Your Hot Wife Conversation

[rickybobby808454]

I -wish- my spouse would entertain this thought. I’d be nervous as hell but I also love the power of knowing it’s all eyes on me and that I’m wanted, so once things got moving I would be fine. The concept of being the desired one would turn me on like mad

i was the one who persuaded my reluctant wife into letting my cousin and I tag team her

 

[Bayzapper10]

In my opinion, it startes and ends with a radical level of honesty. Much of our good marriage had levels of varnished truth, not just keeping things from each other that we assumed would hurt the other’s feelings but things like sexual desires that were contrary to traditional relationships: masturbation, bisexuality or group sex. Learning the techniques to actually communicate with each other took counseling for us, and I would recommend starting there, learning to talk about past hurts without the hurt-er becoming defensive to the hurt-ing. Once you can trust each other to talk about the past successfully then you can have those conversations about a different sexual future.

In my opinion.

 

[000777]

I -wish- my spouse would entertain this thought. I’d be nervous as hell but I also love the power of knowing it’s all eyes on me and that I’m wanted, so once things got moving I would be fine. The concept of being the desired one would turn me on like mad

It's a thrill and so fun for all!

 

[rickybobby808454]

It's a thrill and so fun for all!

fuck yeah it is lol

 

[000777]

i was the one who persuaded my reluctant wife into letting my cousin and I tag team her

That's so hot! Would love to hear more!

 

[Unapologetic_Bull]

I'm not sure if hotwifing is becoming 'normalized' exactly but I think with mainstream media talking about it more, more couples are aware of it and trying it.

I don't see it being adopted across the board but I also think it will become accepted and a lot of couples will have someone in their vanilla ftiend group who does it.

 

[PierceDe]

In my opinion, it startes and ends with a radical level of honesty. Much of our good marriage had levels of varnished truth, not just keeping things from each other that we assumed would hurt the other’s feelings but things like sexual desires that were contrary to traditional relationships: masturbation, bisexuality or group sex. Learning the techniques to actually communicate with each other took counseling for us, and I would recommend starting there, learning to talk about past hurts without the hurt-er becoming defensive to the hurt-ing. Once you can trust each other to talk about the past successfully then you can have those conversations about a different sexual future.

In my opinion.

Elaborate about the radical honesty, please. In most couples being too honest means a fight or hurt feelings.

 

[Bayzapper10]

Elaborate about the radical honesty, please. In most couples being too honest means a fight or hurt feelings.

“Radical honesty” means being able to talk with your S.O. about anything and everything stopping short of gratuitous insults or known hot-buttons with them. I understand the point, as I said above, it took a 3rd party outside counselor to mediate and coach us until we got good at it. My wife and I spent 6-8 months ahead of this in counseling learning those tools.

I would also say that you have to be honest with yourself about where you are at, what you feel and why. After that you must have the desire to be open and vulnerable with your partner, knowing that you cannot control how they will react, still trusting them to see you and want to understand you. If you find yourself holding back things or assuming their response, you have to overcome that first.

Said another way, the vulnerability of being transparent with your partner and wanting them to feel the same level of confidence in you accepting them.

1. I’m not your enemy, you are not my enemy, the problem is enemy, let’s work together to solve the problem.

2. Our relationship must be a safe place to say how we feel. You feel how you feel, Let’s agree to hear each other without being defensive or dismissive.

3. I want to know you, the real you, not the one you want me to see because I want to be the real me with you, not pretend to be someone I’m not.

 

[PierceDe]

“Radical honesty” means being able to talk with your S.O. about anything and everything stopping short of gratuitous insults or known hot-buttons with them. I understand the point, as I said above, it took a 3rd party outside counselor to mediate and coach us until we got good at it. My wife and I spent 6-8 months ahead of this in counseling learning those tools.

I would also say that you have to be honest with yourself about where you are at, what you feel and why. After that you must have the desire to be open and vulnerable with your partner, knowing that you cannot control how they will react, still trusting them to see you and want to understand you. If you find yourself holding back things or assuming their response, you have to overcome that first.

Said another way, the vulnerability of being transparent with your partner and wanting them to feel the same level of confidence in you accepting them.

1. I’m not your enemy, you are not my enemy, the problem is enemy, let’s work together to solve the problem.

2. Our relationship must be a safe place to say how we feel. You feel how you feel, Let’s agree to hear each other without being defensive or dismissive.

3. I want to know you, the real you, not the one you want me to see because I want to be the real me with you, not pretend to be someone I’m not.

That's so hard.

For one you worry how you spouse will take what you say, and then you wonder if you really want to hear them share something you might not be able to digest.

There was a site, I heard of but never visited, that uses some clever mechanism to allow couples to safely open topics together they wouldn't otherwise. I can't recall precisely how it worked, but it was essentially both parties could say what they needed to say by going through a series of questions and then a third party determined where they were on the same page without knowing it, so as to let them know. I think!

 

[Bayzapper10]

You put your finger on it…

you worry how your spouse will take what you say, and then you wonder if you really want to hear them share something you might not be able to digest

… but if you find a way to do it in spite of the thing you’re afraid of losing, you can have a great relationship: nothing hidden, no minefields, no resentments.

You also missed one possibility: something will be revealed that one partner will reject and perhaps deny the other partner. For example, one partner might be on this site, texting and sharing pictures with other people and their partner doesn’t know. It might be that their partner will tell them that they are “uncomfortable” with it and to stop. Or your partner might say they want to have sex with other people, which gives you anxiety, makes you afraid, or jealous. If you can listen and talk from a place of curiosity and understanding and not from a place of defensiveness or selfishness, then you have openness. What could be more important than that?

 

[MrPervYoung]

Don't have a wife because I'm young, but friends think mom is hot.. pm me!

 

[Matt3427]

Back in our 20s, my GF at the time slept with a few men while I was overseas with work. I found out a couple of years later. It became a big turn on for us both. 30 years later we are married with kids and I still love hearing what she gets up to. Has actually kept our sex life alive.

 

[peruchica]

Wife here, and our situation was a little bit different but figured I would offer a different perspective.

My husband didn't necessarily have a fantasy of sharing me specifically; his curiosity stand from him knowing that I enjoyed group sex and had quite a bit of experience with it prior to us meeting. He would ask me about it from time to time until one day he said that he would love to experience it with me. My husband has always given me the queen treatment from the first day that we met so I never felt like he needed to reinforce his love for me. It never popped into my head that he didn't love me or that he didn't respect me just because he wanted to enjoy a threesome with me. If anything, I just wanted to be sure that it was something that he genuinely wanted, and not something that he proposed because he knew that I enjoyed it. We talked about it quite a bit and even when it came to picking the guy that was going to join us, I initially assumed that he would want a stranger but he preferred to invite a close friend of his because he trusted him. It was during that first threesome that he got his first glimpse and enjoyment of just sitting back and watching and that's why eventually developed into a hot wife relationship and also led to us dabbling in other dynamics like swinging and cuckolding. Almost 20 years later and it's still a huge part of our relationship