Tips on writing a foursome?

[LezNymphoLuvsFeet]

Hi, I'm having an idea for a story involving a (lesbian) foursome between celebrities, but even before I have started writing I realise that I probably have to go about it differently than just trying to describe all the action.
So much is going on simultaneously in a foursome, and if the participants are somewhat active in changing positions and changing what they do, it's kind of messy and confusing even if you're a participant - even for a participant it's difficult to keep track of what everyone is doing at any given time. Hence, describing it is difficult without making reading cumbersome and losing the flow to too many details.
So, this brings me to my question: does anyone have any tips on how to write a foursome? I'd be most grateful for your input.

 

[Bamagan]

Hi, I'm having an idea for a story involving a (lesbian) foursome between celebrities, but even before I have started writing I realise that I probably have to go about it differently than just trying to describe all the action.
So much is going on simultaneously in a foursome, and if the participants are somewhat active in changing positions and changing what they do, it's kind of messy and confusing even if you're a participant - even for a participant it's difficult to keep track of what everyone is doing at any given time. Hence, describing it is difficult without making reading cumbersome and losing the flow to too many details.
So, this brings me to my question: does anyone have any tips on how to write a foursome? I'd be most grateful for your input.

Suggestion 1: Keep the principal focus on just one of the participants. Easy enough if it's a 1P narrative, but if you're inclined to jump perspectives in 3P, consider restraining that urge for the scene. Let them be a voyeur for the reader, trying to capture the eroticism of the interlude as they perceive it, rather than just whose fingers are in whom at any given time.
Suggestion 2: Minimize mechanical descriptions of positions and the like. A tight focus should help with that. If the reader needs diagrams or troop deployment maps to visualize the scene, that's a problem. A play-by-play analysis may be helpful for a sporting event, but probably less so for group sex.
Suggestion 3: Give each of the participants a distinctive style or energy for the event. For example: one is timid but fascinated, one is loud and lewd, one vacillates between intense passion and languorous voyeurism, and so forth.

Good luck!

 

[AlinaX]

Even with a foursome, it’s unlikely that all four are at the centre of action. A drifting POV can work as long as you’re clear whose head you’re actually in at that point. With four women, the pronouns are an issue but not an insurmountable one.

 

[LezNymphoLuvsFeet]

Thanks guys for great suggestions!! I really do appreciate it!

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

I have written one foursome story...i tried to include everyone in the fun.. But some feedback from readers wanted more interaction between the couples... Can't win em all

 

[Bazzle]

Hi, I'm having an idea for a story involving a (lesbian) foursome between celebrities, but even before I have started writing I realise that I probably have to go about it differently than just trying to describe all the action.
So much is going on simultaneously in a foursome, and if the participants are somewhat active in changing positions and changing what they do, it's kind of messy and confusing even if you're a participant - even for a participant it's difficult to keep track of what everyone is doing at any given time. Hence, describing it is difficult without making reading cumbersome and losing the flow to too many details.
So, this brings me to my question: does anyone have any tips on how to write a foursome? I'd be most grateful for your input.

You put your left arm in, your left arm out
In, out, in, out, you shake it all about
You do the Hokey Cokey and you turn around
That's what it's all about.
Whoa-o the Hokey Cokey
Whoa-o the Hokey Cokey
Whoa-o the Hokey Cokey
Knees bent, arms stretched
Rah! Rah! Rah!

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Easier in first person. Also I vowed after writing Turkish Delight that if I ever wrote a same-sex foursome again, I'd at least ensure they knew each other's names! It was a gay couple and two guys who massaged them first, so there's a fair bit of 'my guy' and 'his guy'.

So obviously I then wrote a party with ten women, most of them getting it on in groups - Naked Bisexual Lube Wrestling. Keeping them straight (fnar!) was tricky - I had five couples and each having a couple key characteristics and emotions going on, and wrote the highlights, not every move. The less you write about whose hand and knee are where, the less likely you are to write something painful or impossible!

 

[AlinaX]

Yes! It’s so important to find out people’s names or at least give them a temporary nickname.

 

[EmilyMiller]

When I’ve written foursomes third person, I’ve generally written two couples with the pairings shifting. Or loose connections, such as two women kissing while the others go down on one each. That or three women focus on pleasuring the other one, with the focus moving to the next woman post orgasm. Linking them all together - save for maybe a cunnilingual square, can be challenging.

Also I never had an FFF, let alone an FFFF, IRL, so it’s often less realistic than my typical sex scenes, or done by extrapolating / adapting from groups involving guys.

 

[AlinaX]

The Pauli Exclusion Principle in action. FF works because one F spins up, the other spins down.

 

[TiberiusPrime]

IMO, it's easier to do as third person. Clearly define the relationships between the four long before you get to it and, when you do get to that scene, mainly focus on one couple. Do a 60/40 split in the description. It'll also help a bit to have one couple just watch at first before they start in, this way the reader isn't confused.

 

[EmilyMiller]

The Pauli Exclusion Principle in action. FF works because one F spins up, the other spins down.

That gets a

 

[EmilyMiller]

The Pauli Exclusion Principle in action. FF works because one F spins up, the other spins down.

2^-0.5 | > + 2^-0.5 | >

 

[MrPixel]

When I’ve written foursomes third person, I’ve generally written two couples with the pairings shifting. Or loose connections, such as two women kissing while the others go down on one each. That or three women focus on pleasuring the other one, with the focus moving to the next woman post orgasm. Linking them all together - save for maybe a cunnilingual square, can be challenging.

This is roughly how I've been writing it. Foursomes, pairs swap (for fun, add a timer); more-somes, like the sextuplet I just wrote, has FF off to the side in 69 while FMFF has one on top in cowgirl and lots of hand and action to and from everybody else. Theeeeeeeen... shuffle, watch out for stray feet vs. heads. Of course, this is not a party/orgy scene of people who just met, these are steady lovers who more or less know the drill. Sometimes, not everybody gets off, but they have loving, satisfying fun nonetheless. Many variations on that theme, but clinical detail tends not to work well since the literary camera (narrator) can't focus on everything all at once.

2^-0.5 | > + 2^-0.5 | >

Nerds untie!

 

[SimonDoom]

Suggestion 1: Keep the principal focus on just one of the participants. Easy enough if it's a 1P narrative, but if you're inclined to jump perspectives in 3P, consider restraining that urge for the scene. Let them be a voyeur for the reader, trying to capture the eroticism of the interlude as they perceive it, rather than just whose fingers are in whom at any given time.
Suggestion 2: Minimize mechanical descriptions of positions and the like. A tight focus should help with that. If the reader needs diagrams or troop deployment maps to visualize the scene, that's a problem. A play-by-play analysis may be helpful for a sporting event, but probably less so for group sex.
Suggestion 3: Give each of the participants a distinctive style or energy for the event. For example: one is timid but fascinated, one is loud and lewd, one vacillates between intense passion and languorous voyeurism, and so forth.

Good luck!

This seems like really good advice to me. I would add this:

In addition to focusing on just one participant's perspective, focus on the perspective of the LEAST EXPERIENCED person, especially if YOU are not that experienced with this scenario. This accomplishes several things.

First, as the narrator you don't have to be an expert in the subject. You can approach things from the perspective and with the point of view of someone who is experiencing something for the first time. It's easier for you as an author.

Second, if you lack knowledge the story will be more plausible by focusing on the narrative this way.

Third, it may be more erotic. I have a motto with erotic stories: first time is best. The first time you do a foursome is the best, for purposes of an erotic story (maybe not for real life!). All the new sensations, the hesitation, and especially that feeling of crossing an erotic boundary for the first time, transgressing what most people consider "normal."

 

[EmilyMiller]

This is roughly how I've been writing it. Foursomes, pairs swap (for fun, add a timer); more-somes, like the sextuplet I just wrote, has FF off to the side in 69 while FMFF has one on top in cowgirl and lots of hand and action to and from everybody else. Theeeeeeeen... shuffle, watch out for stray feet vs. heads. Of course, this is not a party/orgy scene of people who just met, these are steady lovers who more or less know the drill. Sometimes, not everybody gets off, but they have loving, satisfying fun nonetheless. Many variations on that theme, but clinical detail tends not to work well since the literary camera (narrator) can't focus on everything all at once.

Actual experience tends to lead to more realistic storytelling.

Nerds untie!

Intentional or typo? Then it beats avengers assemble.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I have a motto with erotic stories: first time is best. The first time you do a foursome is the best, for purposes of an erotic story (maybe not for real life!).

IRL while you lose the frisson, practice makes perfect. Maybe it’s as I’m in my dotage now, but sex with someone who knows me inside and out (literally) and with whom I’m totally comfortable, is greatly more fulfilling than my youthful hijinks. Not that I either regret them, nor am I suggesting that what works for me works for everyone. We are all different with different needs and different ways of fulfilling them.

 

[crookedletter]

So much is going on simultaneously in a foursome, and if the participants are somewhat active in changing positions and changing what they do, it's kind of messy and confusing even if you're a participant - even for a participant it's difficult to keep track of what everyone is doing at any given time.

I think I would lean on this as a focus. As others have said, stick to a limited perspective maybe, and embrace the chaos. Tangled limbs, sweaty bodies, maybe the character you're focusing on doesn't always know who's touching her but allows herself not to care, just enjoys it. Moments of eye contact or individual attention can add some character interaction and allow you to zoom in on specifics. But then things escalate and blur and back to the chaos.

 

[SimonDoom]

IRL while you lose the frisson, practice makes perfect. Maybe it’s as I’m in my dotage now, but sex with someone who knows me inside and out (literally) and with whom I’m totally comfortable, is greatly more fulfilling than my youthful hijinks. Not that I either regret them, nor am I suggesting that what works for me works for everyone. We are all different with different needs and different ways of fulfilling them.

No doubt about it. But what do you think about my comment about the difference between the real world and the erotic story world?

Practice makes you better at anything, and in the real world it's more enjoyable to do something if you are better at it. It's true about sex, and it's true about skiing.

But a story about your first time going all the way to the top of the mountain and skiing down it is more fun than a story about the 100th time you've done it. There's more drama, more tension. I think this applies in particular to stories about sex.

I'm probably more taken with the "transgressing boundaries" aspect of erotica than some are. For me it's one of the best parts of it. If I were to write a foursome story I would write it from the perspective of someone doing it for the first time, and I think this approach makes particular sense if you are an author who is taken with the idea but has not actually been involved in a foursome.

 

[EmilyMiller]

But a story about your first time going all the way to the top of the mountain and skiing down it is more fun than a story about the 100th time you've done it.

There is greater drama, I agree. I think it sometimes comes down to: is the story about the sex, or is the sex part of the story. If the former, then building up the meaning of the sex works. If the latter, I’m happy to write people who know each other having great sex. I think I’ve used familarity to say that one partner brought another to orgasm quickly as they knew exactly which buttons to press in which order. I’ve actually done it a lot with couples reuniting after a break, which gives you the best of two worlds.

 

[SimonDoom]

There is greater drama, I agree. I think it sometimes comes down to: is the story about the sex, or is the sex part of the story. If the former, then building up the meaning of the sex works. If the latter, I’m happy to write people who know each other having great sex. I think I’ve used familarity to say that one partner brought another to orgasm quickly as they knew exactly which buttons to press in which order. I’ve actually done it a lot with couples reuniting after a break, which gives you the best of two worlds.

That makes sense. I tend to write stories about sex, not stories with sex.

 

[EmilyMiller]

That makes sense. I tend to write stories about sex, not stories with sex.

I do both, but seem to be gravitating to the latter, with the occasional ‘release’ of a pure fuck-fest in between. It can be fun just writing orgasms for a change.

 

[Husky_Embrace]

I can't find it right now, but in one if the writers threads the suggestion was simple. Threesome? Fine. But only if it's FFM or FMM. They showed in three sentences of writing how difficult an FFF would be, as the amounts of "her" or specific names to allow you to follow what is happening with whom becomes insane. FFFF will be complete chaos.

Going off that suggestion we can see what is needed to minimise that damage. As others suggested, do not focus on the mechanical nature of it. So less "and she grabbed her titty," and more "the hot union of flesh made her brain melt." If titties still need to be grabbed, maybe it is better to keep it vague. "A titty was grabbed," and not "Celeb A titty was grabbed by celeb B." We can then go back to the more vague descriptions what it does for the grabber or grabbee.

If we still want the more mechanical, split it up. Few interactions of 3 or more people are all together. As suggested by some, two can be 69, while to others are doing something with a strap on. They are in a foursome, but there's distinctly different things happening to separate the action for the reader.

If I would write it I would mix the above in a first person perspective. She's in the union of flesh, feeling her body being moved and moulded by the bodies. That's specific yet vague, and everyone's involved. Then you separate it. She watches one put on a strap on and taking the other, while recieving the gift of tongue herself. After a bit you put them in a pile again, where she doesn't know exactly what's happening and who's kissing her x or rubbing her y, to then progress to the next separated scene. It'll keep the idea of 4 people action alive, with specific actions to follow at times.

Though my best suggestion for any story is to make it mean something. As an intense example, a couple having regular old sex does not give as much emotion as a brother and sister for the first time, even if everything else is word for word the same. The story behind it, however small it may be, can make or break the story.

So the first question is, why would these four ladies come together for sex, and is it compelling? Are all four out of money and decide to do it for their fans? Do they want to show they still have sex appeal? Have they never had a lesbian experience, because they can't trust non-celebs not to blab about it? What changes for the women to do this, and how will it affect them in the future?

 

[EmilyMiller]

I can't find it right now, but in one if the writers threads the suggestion was simple. Threesome? Fine. But only if it's FFM or FMM. They showed in three sentences of writing how difficult an FFF would be, as the amounts of "her" or specific names to allow you to follow what is happening with whom becomes insane. FFFF will be complete chaos.

As I wrote in the thread I think you are referring to, try writing a lesbian FFF where all three women are identical (though unrelated) .

 

[Husky_Embrace]

As I wrote in the thread I think you are referring to, try writing a lesbian FFF where all three women are identical (though unrelated) .

She stroked through her golden hair. Her blue eyes reflected her own, a deep blue ocean in a deep blue ocean. She lowered herself on the lips, feeling a wave of passion as the tongue touched the centre of her being. At the same time woman C kissed her perky breasts, having the same size as her name would suggest. Confusingly, all women could be called woman C, she reflected.

Woman A looked at the above and was shocked at the confusion of the writer, who couldn't put together a few sentences without getting a writers block. B looked shocked as well, though it was hard to tell if that was because of the wonderful taste of pussy. How was it so difficult to write a few sentences of FFF without breaking your head on how to separate each individually? The part of near identical women hardly featured in it!

Just like the sex they were having now, maybe it would be best to leave it to a woman. They'll write that hot mess of male fantasy better than anyone else. Right...?


(Incidentally, I've been thinking about a contest where male and female fantasies are written by the opposite sex. Could be interesting to see how the opposite sex views the other's 'prototype' fantasy.)