Online vs Offline

[IronRose35]

Just something I've been thinking about lately, and I'd love to hear how others feel.

- Where do you feel most like yourself — online or offline?
- And where do you feel safer being that version of you?

In everyday life, I spend a lot of energy hiding certain parts of myself. Things I'm into, things I fantasize about, the kinky parts. I keep them tucked away because not everyone needs to know. But even online, I find myself doing a different kind of hiding. I have to be careful about what I share, who I trust, and how much people can find out about me.

For those of you who keep your kink life separate from your day-to-day life, here's something I've been wondering.

If money wasn't a problem, if nothing was holding you back, and you could actually be with whoever your kinky heart wanted… would you change your life to live it out fully?

Or do you prefer keeping it a secret, something just for you and the few people who really get it?

Just curious what this looks like for you.

 

[SirSparky]

I am more my kinky self online and have shared a few of my kinks with like minded people.

If i could,.I would like to be more kinky in my real life, the Dom side of me I want to be for real. Can be a little Dom with my gf, but not fully how i want

 

[MissMandy86]

Online is a lot safer .. especially if your doing taboo stuff

 

[mijayoo]

Online is easier to share deep fantasies however I miss the connection in person when it’s all online

 

[CuriousRick]

I am a bit shy and more reserved in public. So it’s easier to let lose and relax more online. Online relationships can be rewarding too, if both parties are putting effort into. Saying that wouldn’t turn down a offline relationship if it worked out.

 

[EmmAgain]

I’m in a pretty conservative part of the country so I definitely keep my sexuality nice and prim when around neighbours and the in-laws.

The hardest online/offline transition for me has been switching from cam girl to ordinary wife and lover. My husband pointed this one out: I instinctively spread open my pussy when giving BJs, doing anal, etc. it’s pretty much mandatory when you’re having sex as a cam girl, and I still make love like there’s a perving camera around!

I still over-vocalize my orgasms and find it very hard to not communicate on a this sort of forum like it’s just another paying OnlyFans chat.

 

[OddLove]

To the main question, 1. and 2.

I'm completely myself when I'm offline and alone. Especially when I'm alone and doing something creative like writing stories or music. But when it comes to Online vs Offline, it's hard to know. The mask I wear offline around friends and family hides more of my 'secrets' like kink, sexuality, and strong opinions, where as the mask I wear online hides more of my 'dysfunctions' like personality flaws, mental health issues, and emotions/moods. Both masks conceal different parts of me, and leaves me feeling 'not entirely myself' or 'not truly seen' at times.

Short answer. I'm not sure where I feel most like myself regarded Online or Offline.

As far as the other two questions

3. If my wildest kinkiest fantasies could all come true, I wouldn't be interested in those fantasies if it required me to sacrifice or risk close relationships I have with a few friends and family members now. Exciting sex doesn't feel worth my entire life.

4. I do prefer keeping my kinks and sexuality a secret. I don't want to expose my deepest naughty desires to people who are and will forever remain uninvolved in my sex life. That would be reserved for people I'm into romantically/sexually.

 

[SirSparky]

To the main question, 1. and 2.

I'm completely myself when I'm offline and alone. Especially when I'm alone and doing something creative like writing stories or music. But when it comes to Online vs Offline, it's hard to know. The mask I wear offline around friends and family hides more of my 'secrets' like kink, sexuality, and strong opinions, where as the mask I wear online hides more of my 'dysfunctions' like personality flaws, mental health issues, and emotions/moods. Both masks conceal different parts of me, and leaves me feeling 'not entirely myself' or 'not truly seen' at times.

Short answer. I'm not sure where I feel most like myself regarded Online or Offline.

As far as the other two questions

3. If my wildest kinkiest fantasies could all come true, I wouldn't be interested in those fantasies if it required me to sacrifice or risk close relationships I have with a few friends and family members now. Exciting sex doesn't feel worth my entire life.

4. I do prefer keeping my kinks and sexuality a secret. I don't want to expose my deepest naughty desires to people who are and will forever remain uninvolved in my sex life. That would be reserved for people I'm into romantically/sexually.

Well said

 

[IronRose35]

I am more my kinky self online and have shared a few of my kinks with like minded people.

If i could,.I would like to be more kinky in my real life, the Dom side of me I want to be for real. Can be a little Dom with my gf, but not fully how i want

When you say like-minded people, do you mean friends you already had, or people you met because of your kinks?
Were they more on the vanilla side or kinky too?

 

[IronRose35]

Online is a lot safer .. especially if your doing taboo stuff

Taboo, huh?
I find it really interesting that even though the kinky community is huge (at least online), it's still considered taboo by so many.
Seriously, what keeps that stigma alive?

 

[IronRose35]

Online is easier to share deep fantasies however I miss the connection in person when it’s all online

Oh darling, online is never meant to be the final destination.
For most of us, it's just the easiest way to start exploring this lifestyle, and for some (maybe few), just a first step toward offline connections.

 

[IronRose35]

I am a bit shy and more reserved in public. So it’s easier to let lose and relax more online. Online relationships can be rewarding too, if both parties are putting effort into. Saying that wouldn’t turn down a offline relationship if it worked out.

Yes, online connections can be just as meaningful when both people put in the effort.
And I always say it's easier to start online than offline (maybe that's why so many choose to begin that way.)
But connecting for something real online can actually be harder than offline, and it often takes more effort, because it's so easy to put on a mask or fake things online.

 

[IronRose35]

I’m in a pretty conservative part of the country so I definitely keep my sexuality nice and prim when around neighbours and the in-laws.

The hardest online/offline transition for me has been switching from cam girl to ordinary wife and lover. My husband pointed this one out: I instinctively spread open my pussy when giving BJs, doing anal, etc. it’s pretty much mandatory when you’re having sex as a cam girl, and I still make love like there’s a perving camera around!

I still over-vocalize my orgasms and find it very hard to not communicate on a this sort of forum like it’s just another paying OnlyFans chat.

Haha, that sounds like a real and funny challenge!
It must be wild switching from “performer mode” to just being an ordinary wife and lover.
Mind if I ask where you're from?

 

[EmmAgain]

Haha, that sounds like a real and funny challenge!
It must be wild switching from “performer mode” to just being an ordinary wife and lover.
Mind if I ask where you're from?

I’m a Texas girl originally (Houston) but started my camming career while on exchange in Argentina.

 

[IronRose35]

To the main question, 1. and 2.

I'm completely myself when I'm offline and alone. Especially when I'm alone and doing something creative like writing stories or music. But when it comes to Online vs Offline, it's hard to know. The mask I wear offline around friends and family hides more of my 'secrets' like kink, sexuality, and strong opinions, where as the mask I wear online hides more of my 'dysfunctions' like personality flaws, mental health issues, and emotions/moods. Both masks conceal different parts of me, and leaves me feeling 'not entirely myself' or 'not truly seen' at times.

Short answer. I'm not sure where I feel most like myself regarded Online or Offline.

As far as the other two questions

3. If my wildest kinkiest fantasies could all come true, I wouldn't be interested in those fantasies if it required me to sacrifice or risk close relationships I have with a few friends and family members now. Exciting sex doesn't feel worth my entire life.

4. I do prefer keeping my kinks and sexuality a secret. I don't want to expose my deepest naughty desires to people who are and will forever remain uninvolved in my sex life. That would be reserved for people I'm into romantically/sexually.

Well said!
Though I think I'm a bit be the opposite though. I tend to show my messy side more online—my flaws, moods, all of it. Maybe that's exactly why I find it harder to trust in online spaces? Just a thought.

 

[SirSparky]

When you say like-minded people, do you mean friends you already had, or people you met because of your kinks?
Were they more on the vanilla side or kinky too?

Like minded people i have found online like here. The onky person i have shared some kinks with in real life is my gf. She knows I like to be Dom and enjoys a good spanking

 

[MissMandy86]

Taboo, huh?
I find it really interesting that even though the kinky community is huge (at least online), it's still considered taboo by so many.
Seriously, what keeps that stigma alive?

Well... I ment safer as in CNC since you could be dealing with real predators

 

[sluttymood]

Well... I ment safer as in CNC since you could be dealing with real predators

i completely agree with that

 

[PleasureDaddy]

I’ve had casual online/phone play partners and also some that were intense and long term. for most purposes they felt like a full relationship.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

I've never seen the attraction in online BDSM - it's a very physical sensory thing for me. Dirty talk, yeah, love that, and online works.

I have friends where I can be very much myself with, but not necessarily the time/energy/space to do much kink, which is something I and others are trying to work on, now children are grown, etc.

 

[IARainman]

Just something I've been thinking about lately, and I'd love to hear how others feel.

- Where do you feel most like yourself — online or offline?
- And where do you feel safer being that version of you?

In everyday life, I spend a lot of energy hiding certain parts of myself. Things I'm into, things I fantasize about, the kinky parts. I keep them tucked away because not everyone needs to know. But even online, I find myself doing a different kind of hiding. I have to be careful about what I share, who I trust, and how much people can find out about me.

For those of you who keep your kink life separate from your day-to-day life, here's something I've been wondering.

If money wasn't a problem, if nothing was holding you back, and you could actually be with whoever your kinky heart wanted… would you change your life to live it out fully?

Or do you prefer keeping it a secret, something just for you and the few people who really get it?

Just curious what this looks like for you.

I would throw away my phone entirely and simply serve my queen (who I would have to find)