StillStunned
Scruffy word herder
- Joined
- Jun 4, 2023
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What the well-dressed man is wearing? Prize for Scripture Knowledge? Rosie Banks?fewer and fewer people who will get PG Wodehouse references
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What the well-dressed man is wearing? Prize for Scripture Knowledge? Rosie Banks?fewer and fewer people who will get PG Wodehouse references
Picasso and Dali are the two I always think about.https://storage.googleapis.com/hippostcard/p/e1effa3f57121061be24d4950955d4c7.jpg
When I started writing, I didn't really know all the rules. In fact, I thought a lot of the rules were old fashioned, outdated. Style was what counted, and style trumped rules.
And I was mostly right. But when I look back at my early stuff, I often cringe, not because it's badly written, particularly, but because I can see how it could have been better. Because the fact is, you need to know the rules before you can break them successfully.
The illustration above is a painting titled Portrait of the Artist's Mother. It is an example of what was considered good, by the rules, portraiture in the late 19th Century.
The artist is Pablo Picasso. Before he broke all the rules, he had learned them.
And Mondriaan. A very accomplished painter before he ventured into abstract art.Picasso and Dali are the two I always think about.
I can't imagine not putting in Easter Eggs - it's like a little reward to myself. As far as I know not one person has spotted one yet as there are no comments about it. I am aware that a lot of stuff I throw in is very obscure, and these days there are fewer and fewer people who will get PG Wodehouse references. I enjoy a lot of the research for the references, too - like finding out who had the best selling 78 in the UK in 1911.
I've just stuck Eulalie Soeurs in a WIP.What the well-dressed man is wearing? Prize for Scripture Knowledge? Rosie Banks?
Nice piece, too.I think that's the longest post I've ever made here...
Nice piece, too.
No first-hand experience with you. We'll have to get in touch with your husband.Me? Or the post?
Also one of the most profound. Kudos, Melissa.I think that's the longest post I've ever made here...
Cultivate empathy for your readers. They are not just customers or consumers. Think of your interaction with them as a shared experience. Somewhere, right now, a young couple are sharing the hot parts of one of our stories to turn each other on. Someone is reading a tender romance to their lover of many decades. Someone is reclined on their couch, shedding tears as she recognizes your character's sorrow, while another reader is sitting at the corner table in a coffeehouse, smiling gleefully at the clever turn of your plot.
I fully agree with you. 100% . Actually I am just having coffee now.A few months ago, in another thread, someone said that they had run some of my stories through AI for analysis, because they wanted to figure out how to write like I do. (I told them I was uncomfortable with that and they were gracious and said they would not do it anymore.) AwkwardMD made the very astute observation that, rather than use AI they could just ask me. I responded and said that my one piece of advice to anyone who wanted to learn from my writing was that they cultivate empathy.
I’ve thought more about that and I realize that it is in fact the key to everything I do, not just as a writer, but as a wife and a friend, in my work and in how I try to live my daily life.
That wasn’t always the case. I started writing seriously at a time when I was trying to pull myself up from the lowest ebb of a troubled life. I had a Tumblr account and I wrote essays about substance abuse, about incarceration, about my relationship with my mother, and about the entanglement of my sexuality and my addiction.
That last point is why, when I got up the courage to turn my experiences into a somewhat fictionalized memoir and present it to a wider audience than the couple of hundred people who followed my Tumblr, I brought it to Literotica. I didn’t know anywhere else that might publish it.
I titled it My Fall and Rise. People often flip it to the more common expression, “rise and fall,” but the story is not about the fall. It’s about the rise. People who fall and don’t rise seldom get to tell their stories. I hoped that if I told mine, made this public allocution, my demons would have less power over me.
As I was writing, I assumed it was a one and done. But the process of writing, of expressing myself; finding the right word, conveying the right emotion, was affirming, empowering. And while the story didn’t reach a lot of readers, many of those it did reach were the right readers. I received comments and DM’s and emails from people telling me how much my story was like their own or how it helped them better understand someone close to them. And I found other writers here, who encouraged me to nurture my talents.
But of all the reactions I received, one comment stood out. It staggered me when I read it and it stays with me now, almost eight years later. The commenter said that My Fall and Rise was “the story of a young woman who feels empathy for everyone else, but has to learn to have it for herself.”
I recognized that truth. Empathy without self regard can be dangerous. It can become, “It’s my fault he hits me.” It can become, “I’m not worthy of their love.”
I read that comment and I realized that by writing my story, I had found it within myself to let go of guilt and regret.
I continued to write and it became one of the most important things in my life. Yes, I’m aware that some might say, “Well, you just found another addiction,” and there may be a kernel of truth to that, but I also found a man who loved me unconditionally. I found that I was capable of going to college and succeeding. Eventually, to find a career that fulfills me.
I described my second project, Mary and Alvin, as “the biography of a relationship,” but more than anything, it was an exploration of empathy. I spent the next three years with those characters, and I put them through many of the situations we encounter in our lives, from falling in love to losing those close to us. There were births and deaths and family fights and nights singing together around the campfire. And every word of it came from a place of empathy for each character, whether it was the leads or someone they met in an incidental encounter. That’s the heart of my philosophy of writing, a standard of “character care” I have tried to maintain ever since.
Cultivate empathy by actively observing and listening to those around you, whether they are your significant other, your rival at work, or the worker at the drive through window. Try to imagine how they see themselves. Remind yourself that they have hopes and concerns and dreams like you do, that they are the center of their own universe. Try to understand them, and if you can’t, try to understand why not.
Will doing that make you a better person? Yeah, probably, but that ain’t my concern. I’m here to tell you that it will make you a better writer. When you apply the fruits of all that observation to your characters, they will come alive in your heart, then in your words, and then in the minds of your readers. AwkwardMD has said that my characters “shine” and I don’t know just what she means by that, but I think she senses the empathy that went into their creation.
Cultivate empathy for your readers. They are not just customers or consumers. Think of your interaction with them as a shared experience. Somewhere, right now, a young couple are sharing the hot parts of one of our stories to turn each other on. Someone is reading a tender romance to their lover of many decades. Someone is reclined on their couch, shedding tears as she recognizes your character's sorrow, while another reader is sitting at the corner table in a coffeehouse, smiling gleefully at the clever turn of your plot.
You are there with them. Respect that. Honor that.
Cultivate empathy for yourself. This is often the hardest to do, as I well know. Write to express yourself, or write just for kicks. Whatever brings you satisfaction. It’s not a competition, there is no objective standard of success. As someone said earlier, if you write, you’re a writer. Take pride in that. Treat yourself to an ice cream or something.
Elegantly said, thank you.I responded and said that my one piece of advice to anyone who wanted to learn from my writing was that they cultivate empathy.
Cultivate empathy for your readers. They are not just customers or consumers. Think of your interaction with them as a shared experience.
You are there with them. Respect that. Honor that.
Underlines are mine.Like a movie, like a film, very visual, uses all the senses.
Lots of observation, tiny details, what I call grace notes.
Those two stories are each 750 words, but illustrate the point, perfectly. I think if you read any other story of mine, you'd find a similar emphasis on tiny details, and the longer the story, the more the senses are deployed.I didn't review any of your older stories to see how often this technique is used, but it was interesting (exciting?) enough to prompt me to post 2 or 3 threads here in AH.
Ok, fair enough. But I still think the practise of using one intensely described detail in the opening of the scene, to get the reader in the intense focusing mood, is a tool that can be used to great advantage.Those two stories are each 750 words, but illustrate the point, perfectly. I think if you read any other story of mine, you'd find a similar emphasis on tiny details, and the longer the story, the more the senses are deployed.
May I suggest you read the three vignettes that begin The Floating World, you'll find many similar small details. The moment (movement) a clock hand makes when it ticks; the passing of time observed in a shadow moving on the floor; the observation of the skin of a girl's belly, or the dark dusk of hair on her arm.
As an aside, "all the senses" comes from several comments about various stories, making me realise I did that. But I never deliberately think, it's time to invoke another sense now, it's much more an subconscious thing, bringing the senses into play.