"Lesbians have more orgasms than straight women"

[WeShallUnclench]

There is some hard (har har) data that cisgender women who have sex with other women enjoy more orgasms than women who have sex with men.

Now, a traditional knee-jerk reaction might be, "men are just worse at sex" or "only a woman truly understands a woman's body".

Indeed, there is some anecdotal evidence that in cishet couples, penis-in-vagina sex until the dude orgasms is still too often seen as the main event, whereas in woman on woman encounters people tend to pursue activities they find more equally stimulating, with more focus on the clitoris.

But at least in theory, this is "fixable" - cisgender men can take more inspiration from lesbian sex, and there can be more focus on stimulation for women.

This study (sorry, paywall) however suggests that one factor is also "sexual scripts" - women behave a certain way with male partners. They go into encounters expecting less pleasure to begin with, and overall, they expect certain roles for each partner, which just so happen to be less favorable to female orgsams.

So what are your thoughts - should het couples have "more lesbian" sex?
Should both cisgender men and women deconstruct their implicit sexual scripts?
Have you experience doing so?
If you are a woman, do you expect guys to take the initiative in changing the pattern, and vice versa?
Women who had sex with both men and other women, did you feel more relaxed and "receptive", and/or like you had more agency, when you were with women?

Do you prefer the classic "hetero script" even if it is less stimulating? Do you find it more stimulating?

In fiction, do you like to explore more "clitoral" scripts, or do you prefer penis-in-vagina focus?

 

[hadahardon]

As a cis gendered straight male I'll chime in my from my personal experience. My guess is that maybe I'm not the norm referred to in those articles/studies. And the men here on this site, I'd wager to guess might skew outside of the norm as well.

I'm not satisfied until my partner is satisfied. Foreplay and pleasing my partner is a huge turn on for me, and as such, almost always results in my partner achieving orgasm before I do.

There are surely occasions where she'll want to please me only without any reciprocation, but those are few and far between as any focus on me makes me want to focus on her.

Those are my two cents anyway!

 

[dodgeboy2]

There is some hard (har har) data that cisgender women who have sex with other women enjoy more orgasms than women who have sex with men.

Now, a traditional knee-jerk reaction might be, "men are just worse at sex" or "only a woman truly understands a woman's body".

Indeed, there is some anecdotal evidence that in cishet couples, penis-in-vagina sex until the dude orgasms is still too often seen as the main event, whereas in woman on woman encounters people tend to pursue activities they find more equally stimulating, with more focus on the clitoris.

But at least in theory, this is "fixable" - cisgender men can take more inspiration from lesbian sex, and there can be more focus on stimulation for women.

This study (sorry, paywall) however suggests that one factor is also "sexual scripts" - women behave a certain way with male partners. They go into encounters expecting less pleasure to begin with, and overall, they expect certain roles for each partner, which just so happen to be less favorable to female orgsams.

So what are your thoughts - should het couples have "more lesbian" sex?
Should both cisgender men and women deconstruct their implicit sexual scripts?
Have you experience doing so?
If you are a woman, do you expect guys to take the initiative in changing the pattern, and vice versa?
Women who had sex with both men and other women, did you feel more relaxed and "receptive", and/or like you had more agency, when you were with women?

Do you prefer the classic "hetero script" even if it is less stimulating? Do you find it more stimulating?

In fiction, do you like to explore more "clitoral" scripts, or do you prefer penis-in-vagina focus?

I sometimes find some of these studies to be incorrect at least from my perspective as I would say my wife would maybe disagree with that and I am sure many hetro women may also.

For one I have always made sure my wife was satisfied completely before I would seek my own, if she wanted multiple orgasms and then go to bed then that's what she got and well that was my satisfaction, if she wanted more I would do as she wanted as for me her pleasure was what is important to me. She did almost always want to make love but, there were many many months before my ED was diagnosed that I couldn't do more and during that time I would make sure all her pent up sexual desires were met, sometimes only one orgasm was enough and there were also days that there were several sometimes giving my tongue and mouth a very very tiring workout.

Just my two cents on this post!

 

[WeShallUnclench]

As a cis gendered straight male I'll chime in my from my personal experience. My guess is that maybe I'm not the norm referred to in those articles/studies. And the men here on this site, I'd wager to guess might skew outside of the norm as well.

I'm not satisfied until my partner is satisfied. Foreplay and pleasing my partner is a huge turn on for me, and as such, almost always results in my partner achieving orgasm before I do.

There are surely occasions where she'll want to please me only without any reciprocation, but those are few and far between as any focus on me makes me want to focus on her.

Those are my two cents anyway!

True, one thing to keep in mind is which communities you are talking about/to.

Sometimes I hear and read things that remind me that in the wider world, standards can actually be really low, compared to what I expect in my own mariage.
You hear things like "Urgh. Men only want blowjobs and 10 seconds penis-in-vagina sex" and you realize, your experience and that of the people you hang out with are not universal.

 

[hadahardon]

That's a very good point. You can definitely get a lot of confirmation bias if you socialize and interact with people that share similar views and experiences.

I often hear stories that I'm appalled at: the behavior of the men and how they treat women. And I realize that things like that don't happen within the circle of acquaintances and friends that I surround myself with.

 

[SPARTAN047]

For all we know, an angry lesbian feminist made up that study.

Gay guys fuck around a lot more and cum a lot more than straight guys and girls.

Draw your own conclusions.

 

[NewFrontier]

"Lesbians have more orgasms than straight women"​

Now that is a study the USAid should fund!

 

[Sebastian2001]

There is some hard (har har) data that cisgender women who have sex with other women enjoy more orgasms than women who have sex with men.

Now, a traditional knee-jerk reaction might be, "men are just worse at sex" or "only a woman truly understands a woman's body".

Indeed, there is some anecdotal evidence that in cishet couples, penis-in-vagina sex until the dude orgasms is still too often seen as the main event, whereas in woman on woman encounters people tend to pursue activities they find more equally stimulating, with more focus on the clitoris.

But at least in theory, this is "fixable" - cisgender men can take more inspiration from lesbian sex, and there can be more focus on stimulation for women.

This study (sorry, paywall) however suggests that one factor is also "sexual scripts" - women behave a certain way with male partners. They go into encounters expecting less pleasure to begin with, and overall, they expect certain roles for each partner, which just so happen to be less favorable to female orgsams.

So what are your thoughts - should het couples have "more lesbian" sex?
Should both cisgender men and women deconstruct their implicit sexual scripts?
Have you experience doing so?
If you are a woman, do you expect guys to take the initiative in changing the pattern, and vice versa?
Women who had sex with both men and other women, did you feel more relaxed and "receptive", and/or like you had more agency, when you were with women?

Do you prefer the classic "hetero script" even if it is less stimulating? Do you find it more stimulating?

In fiction, do you like to explore more "clitoral" scripts, or do you prefer penis-in-vagina focus?

Such studies have been widely reported but there is likely NO direct correlation -- I would prefer more PIV as central theme but definitely female orgasm is key !

 

[bbwAlexa]

I think its just because there are too many guys who do not know how to get a woman off. In my lifetime it's a 1:10 ratio. Too much thinking that acting like a porn star is what sets women off.

 

[Jw75766]

Curious, how many orgasms do you consider normal? My goal with my wife is at least to get her three before I penetrate (unless she's just in the quickie mood). I take a lot of pride in getting my wife her max pleasure because I know she has a much easier time orgasming (not a word but what the hell) when she's the main attraction. Once I'm in, she uses her vibrator and can have a couple to few more orgasms but I usually have to "jump start her first". Do most men leave their women feeling left behind?

 

[FuckRad]

Curious, how many orgasms do you consider normal? My goal with my wife is at least to get her three before I penetrate (unless she's just in the quickie mood). I take a lot of pride in getting my wife her max pleasure because I know she has a much easier time orgasming (not a word but what the hell) when she's the main attraction. Once I'm in, she uses her vibrator and can have a couple to few more orgasms but I usually have to "jump start her first". Do most men leave their women feeling left behind?

Almost always 2 to 3 for her before going in for mine. Getting her going makes things so much better for me. We are similar.

 

[Jw75766]

Almost always 2 to 3 for her before going in for mine. Getting her going makes things so much better for me. We are similar.

Yep, I get a great deal of pleasure and satisfaction knowing she got a good go before I got mine.

 

[Saint_Ann]

What's the opposite of a straight woman?

 

[LinusLattimore]

As a cis gendered straight male I'll chime in my from my personal experience. My guess is that maybe I'm not the norm referred to in those articles/studies. And the men here on this site, I'd wager to guess might skew outside of the norm as well.

I'm not satisfied until my partner is satisfied. Foreplay and pleasing my partner is a huge turn on for me, and as such, almost always results in my partner achieving orgasm before I do.

There are surely occasions where she'll want to please me only without any reciprocation, but those are few and far between as any focus on me makes me want to focus on her.

Those are my two cents anyway!

You describe my understanding as if I'd written it myself. It's an understanding I was lucky to be able to develop over many years of patient tutoring by Her.

 

[SusanHoward]

I can’t say whether that’s true or not.

But I can say that straight men have had many more orgasms with me!

 

[Handeguy]

I'd LOVE for my partner to have as many orgasms as she can handle. If I'm not doing what it takes, I'd gladly show a great eagerness to learn more, be all ears for any suggestions she might have, enthusiastically change my "moves", or add to my repertoire if that's what it would take. A huge part of my pleasure comes from giving her pleasure. For me, it's not about who deserves what or the expectations one should or shouldn't bring to the bedroom or what role(s) one should or shouldn't play. All I know is that her pleasure only magnifies my own.

 

[lovecraft68]

I would imagine this is because female lovers make an effort to please while male lovers don't

Except here of course where every schmuck in the forums claims they "Live to make women cum and satisfy them."

That's why they spend all their time here.

 

[MaturemanAJ]

Who knows the true answer as studies are B S. Remember when eggs were bad for you?
In our swapping years I definitely learned a few things about sex by paying attention and learning years afterwards what you think is right necessarily isn't as everyone is different.

I assumed in our swapping years with 3 other couples that long cocks were more enjoyable for women.
At least for my wife it wasn't true but I assumed she was having the time of her life with 3 8"cocks to play with.
I learned from her that having your cervix repeatedly slammed into does not lend to orgasmic sex at least for her.
She put a stop )to the swapping because she never had an orgasm during and got tired of hearing her female friends have orgasms with me. Her words not mine.

Now what I personally learned was that once I decided that I was going to be better ( forced learning by me) I learned how to read a woman's body language, sounds, squirms and so on. I very good at oral before, during and after sex. I put away the stigma of being afraid of cum.
Once I put my female partners before my satisfaction I actually became more satisfied sexually and the female orgasm drove me.
During the swapping years I had female partners thanking me for their orgasms.
My wife has told me " I never imagined in my life I would have the amount of orgasms you have given me and continue to give me" she is 68
Some here will say I have a big ego and that's fine because I admit I love hearing, seeing, feeling a woman orgasm.
I love multi orgasmic ones that say " one more, one more, one more" or when they cry afterwards because they are so emotional.
I love sex and even more I love to please.

 

[JimDee676]

I've always enjoyed bringing my female partners off. I happen to love eating pussy, stimulating their clit with my tongue or fingers and I'll even go down on their ass if they're into that activity. Same goes with their nipples. I love stroking them and licking them and sucking them. If she gets off, she's happy and hen I'm happy.

 

[GoodnessO]

Who knows the true answer as studies are B S. Remember when eggs were bad for you?
In our swapping years I definitely learned a few things about sex by paying attention and learning years afterwards what you think is right necessarily isn't as everyone is different.

I assumed in our swapping years with 3 other couples that long cocks were more enjoyable for women.
At least for my wife it wasn't true but I assumed she was having the time of her life with 3 8"cocks to play with.
I learned from her that having your cervix repeatedly slammed into does not lend to orgasmic sex at least for her.
She put a stop )to the swapping because she never had an orgasm during and got tired of hearing her female friends have orgasms with me. Her words not mine.

Now what I personally learned was that once I decided that I was going to be better ( forced learning by me) I learned how to read a woman's body language, sounds, squirms and so on. I very good at oral before, during and after sex. I put away the stigma of being afraid of cum.
Once I put my female partners before my satisfaction I actually became more satisfied sexually and the female orgasm drove me.
During the swapping years I had female partners thanking me for their orgasms.
My wife has told me " I never imagined in my life I would have the amount of orgasms you have given me and continue to give me" she is 68
Some here will say I have a big ego and that's fine because I admit I love hearing, seeing, feeling a woman orgasm.
I love multi orgasmic ones that say " one more, one more, one more" or when they cry afterwards because they are so emotional.
I love sex and even more I love to please.

And I'd love to meet you. As for large cocks, they need to especially bridled. Cervix slamming is definitely not a turn on for me... until I'm begging for it, then for me, a little slamming .

 

[Bigboobbabe]

Charlie Sheen said it in two and a half men. My partner took it to heart.

"Ladies first"

My Master, on the other hand, won't stop until I have had many.
16 was a high number before I was permitted to pleasure him.

 

[Bigboobbabe]

My Master would argue that. 18 we counted in one night.

My ex's best friend will also argue.
45 minutes and somehow he didn't drown.

 

[SmokingFap]

I can only say that I’ve become very critical these days when it comes to so-called scientific postulates. Science has become extremely politicized, especially when it comes to pushing agendas.

As a matter of fact many drunken one-night stands result in rather bad sex, but in relationships, I’ve never experienced partners not learning to push each other’s buttons in the right way.
Still, there are couples with a pretty dormant sex life who don’t work on themselves and don’t communicate. But you don’t need a study to know that such things exist.
It's also worth considering that lesbians probably rely a lot on sex toys during sex. Vibrators, for example, are specifically designed to bring women to orgasm. So maybe it's an unfair comparison, since many heterosexual couples only use sex toys occasionally if any at all, as in theory, their own bodies are enough to stimulate each other.

However, promoting same-sex sex as some kind of philosopher’s stone makes me personally very skeptical—skeptical of the kind of people who conducted this study and whether a certain bias played a role. Because that kind of thing is very common in science nowadays.

Besides that, most women simply aren't open to it, because they are just into men, not women. I know a lot of straight women who have always dismissed the idea when asked about lesbian sex. The usual answer was, “That’s not for me—I want a guy. Women just don’t turn me on.” As a heterosexual man, I completely understand that. If someone suggested I try gay sex, I’d reject it too, because I’m 100 percent not into it.

You simply know what turns you on and what doesn’t. For me, it’s f.e. female curves and naturalness. And for straight women, it’s masculinity—something they simply can’t find in other women.

This meme hits the nail on the head when it comes to agenda pushing "science" today:

View attachment 2531200

Dude (I'm assuming), have you ever actually been with a woman before? Or just known one? Maybe get your head out of science books and male-oriented YouTube videos or put your grad school thesis down for a while and actually meet a human female.

 

[SmokingFap]

Instead of arguing your point in any proper way, or somehow refuting mine, you wrote bogus fanfiction about me.
I suspect a deep rooted inferiority complex in your case as the motivating factor behind this post, which doesn't even bother to criticize anything I've written, but instead immediately resorts to ridiculous personal attacks. When you can't refute the message, you attack the messenger — a classic sign of weakness.
If I sound too intellectual for you — which clearly seems to trigger you — that already tells me a lot about you, but nothing about my success with women. It's also delusional coming from someone who has accumulated insane 11,646 posts on an online adult forum. Which one of us is more likely to spend most of his time in the real world with real people?

Dude, you couldn't carry my mental jockstrap. I just don't debate completely retarded premises.

 

[32aaPixie]

I would imagine this is because female lovers make an effort to please while male lovers don't

So true. For women, the orgasm, or orgasms' is the 'main event'. For Guys getting her off so that THEY can get to their 'main event' is on their mind. IMHO.