Cock Talk

[Mei5ter]

And I’d love to meet @Mei5ter because he makes me happy.

And you make me happy too...so I guess it's a date?

 

[Mei5ter]

Meat Up

https://64.media.tumblr.com/5b6ee64a2f0784fdf31202581bdcce2b/318c420e4b50b263-6b/s540x810/18de27818aab7655dd9e85edd65e6d90b029cf5b.jpg

(I wrote a bunch of these questions and realized they were too confusingly written with all the ‘Did you/Would you’ words—so I’m just going to put ideas down and let you answer however you will).

Meet anyone from Lit in person?

I haven't.

For sex or friendship?
In public for safety?

Sex in public? That's...for safety??

Bring a friend for safety?

Sex in public where you each bring a friend??? You have quite an idea of a first date, don't you?

Share recent full face and body pics first?

Anyone here whom I'd consider meeting would already know what I look like.

Who would you most like to meet from Lit (in person) and for what reason?

I didn't join Lit to meet people. I joined to find somewhere to publish my mediocre, turgid stories and where I could talk about sex in a safe, judgement-free environment. That, for me, means maintaining a firewall between Lit and my offline worlds, and I take my privacy and safety seriously.

But you can find amazing people anywhere, and I have been fortunate enough to find some here on Lit. They are now part of my offline world too, and they know me in ways others don't and won't. They know who they are, and I hope they know how special they are, and I'd love to meet them in person if the chance arose.

Do you think the number of Listers who have met and fucked is a high number or low number?

No clue. Low, I think? I assume people who are looking to meet and fuck would be on Tinder or something rather than here?

If there was a Literotica in person group meet up, would you go? Would you go with the intention of sex, or curiosity, or sexual curiosity?

Send me the Zoom link. But I'll be watching with my camera off.

 

[Apisto42]

New thread idea?

Where the hell’s the story?!

Dude. While I expect questions which are thought provoking and entertaining from you on a regular basis, there is nothing in my posting history that suggests I will deliver stories quickly.

Patience. Think of it as the gap between new episodes on tv before streaming.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Tough luck

I just got it waxed. There may be some polishing, though?

I thought you had it lasered. I can only imagine the power needed by that laser to cut through that hippie bush.

Your dad?

This actually made me snort.

I can't quite decide if this was a come on . . . .

Oh Endless. You can’t just throw out words like “come on” on this forum. You’re bound to get immature people like Hotwords and Apisto who will make jokes about cumming on things. It’s a good thing you have a friend like me to look out for you.

Y'all are the meanest flirters I have ever known.

It's kind of terrifying.

She’s been trying for years. No means no.

New thread idea?

Where the hell’s the story?!

I feel like people are really interested in the pmann/Apisto dick story. I actually forgot about it until he reminded me a little bit ago. (That’s not to say his dick was forgettable, ladies).

Come on Apisto… give the people what they want.

 

[Apisto42]

That said, here you go:

I’m never sure on a story like this whether to lead with the punch line or the background. But I suppose I should start with the way I lived it so you can relive the same emotions I experienced (or at least a poor facsimile of said emotions).

It was somewhere around 2016 or 2017, which I can only date loosely because I happen to remember where my cubicle was in the office at the time. I had recently switched positions (got a coveted window cube, yay for me, small wins right?). Lit was also fairly new for me posting regularly in the PG, so it was like a bright shiny new toy. Kind of like when you hit puberty and discover your new favorite toy and companion. You go all in and lose your mind a bit and do stupid shit.

So I had met several woman by this time and experienced the joy of sharing pics and flirting outrageously, sometimes fairly quickly, others being a slow burn. I had not really interacted much with @Lord Pmann though so I didn’t know how he operated.

I also was only on lit three days a week while I was commuting. And only during certain hours of the day. Unlike a lot of lit, the PG has a community of people that form some pretty tight groups it seems to me. It’s easy to find a few threads and people that you interact with easily and it fills your lit time, so it can actually become a bit insular.

Which is a long way to say that I was not aware of all the existing connections between various posters.

You might think at this point I’ve gone off tangent, like an old man telling a story where he starts one story, then works backward to the beginning of time and slowly over the course of three or four hours meanders back to the present day. Which reminds of the book I’m currently reading by Patrick Manus. I read a lot of his books when I was young. He wrote humor (“humour” (just in case a particular Brit is reading and wants to put a “wow” reaction on this post she’ll know what I’m saying)) pieces for Field & Stream. One of his favorite characters often told stories like that. Where you really had no idea what the point was or where it was heading.

Where was I? You’re supposed to keep me on track.

Right. Cock pics. Which seems appropriate for this thread. So I was doing what a lot of excited inexperienced litsers do and jumping in feet first, cock in one hand, phone in the other and typing with my nose. When a female poster that I had occasionally interacted with in the threads sent me a pm. It was flirty and fun, but not serious. Still my favorite type (you might want to take notes at this point, just a heads up).

Then she asked for a pic. But not just any pic, she wanted it to be fun. A decorated cock pic. Which cracked me right the fuck up. This was new! Different! It was funny. You can usually seduce me with humor (humour). Sensual is great, kinky is titillating, but humor (humour) is the best. At least for catching my attention.

Because sex is fun as one of its main attractions. It’s stupid, animalistic and silly. It can move from raw passion to giggles and back in a heartbeat before ending in gasping breath and screams. It’s better than tacos and I don’t say that about many things.

Where was I?

Decoration.

I’ll get there eventually (you can blame @hotwords229_A and his impatience for the digressions (and this vanpool ride, bumpy as fuck)). Trust me.

I happened to have some card stock on hand at the office and I’m pretty crafty, so I got out the card stock and scissors and made a little sailor hat. I don’t remember if I colored (coloured) it or not with highlighters. If I didn’t, I should have.

Perched that little (not that little! I have a truly magnificent cock, not too big, not too medium, fits just oh so right) hat over the crown and took a quite excellenct photo. I said photo because this was no ordinary pic. It was a work of art. Should be hanging in the Louvre. Right beside the Mona Lisa so everyone knows why she’s smiling.

Sent it off with a laugh and a smile. Wondering how she was going to respond and to my surprise… nothing. I chalked it up to time zone differences and didn’t worry about it. Still nothing the next day.

I figured it was just one of those things. Win some, lose some.

Fast forward to last January/February. Life had changed a lot, Covid, remote, cancer, hadn’t been on lit much, but I was checking in more often as stress release and reconnecting with people. Which was great. This community of perverts has brought me a lot of laughs and solace over the last three years. Thank you.

(Pause for tissue use. For tears, not cleanup. Pervert)

I happened upon a discussion about alts and found out that some people had actually shared usernames and passwords. One of those parings was Pmann and the woman who had requested a decorated pic.

I know right?!? I just dropped the punchline after an emotional (emotionaul) paragraph. What kind of asshole does that?

I was outside walking the dog when I realized that Pmann had talked me into decorating my cock and sending him a pic. I laughed so hard. It was hysterical. What a numpty I was (am).

So when Enny said how funny a dick hat would be, I felt I had to share this.

Hat (lol) off to you pmann.

 

[morelikeasong]

That said, here you go:

I’m never sure on a story like this whether to lead with the punch line or the background. But I suppose I should start with the way I lived it so you can relive the same emotions I experienced (or at least a poor facsimile of said emotions).

It was somewhere around 2016 or 2017, which I can only date loosely because I happen to remember where I my cubicle was in the office at the time. I had recently switched positions (got a coveted window cube, yay for me, small wins right?). Lit was also fairly new for me posting regularly in the PG, so it was like a bright shiny new toy. Kind of like when you hit puberty and discover your new favorite toy and companion. You go all in and lose your mind a bit and do stupid shit.

So I had met several woman by this time and experienced the joy of sharing pics and flirting outrageously, sometimes fairly quickly, others being a slow burn. I had not really interacted much with @Lord Pmann though so I didn’t know how he operated.

I also was only on lit three days a week while I was commuting. And only during certain hours of the day. Unlike a lot of lit, the PG has a community of people that form some pretty tight groups it seems to me. It’s easy to find a few threads and people that you interact with easily and it fills your lit time, so it can actually become a bit insular.

Which is a long way to say that I was not aware of all the existing connections between various posters.

You might think at this point I’ve gone off tangent, like an old man telling a story where he starts one story, then works backward to the beginning of time and slowly over the course of three or fours meanders back to the present day. Which reminds of the book I’m currently reading by Patrick Manus. I read a lot of his books when I was young. He wrote humor (“humour” (just in case a particular Brit is reading and wants to put a “wow” reaction on this post she’ll know what I’m saying)) pieces for Field & Stream. One of his favorite characters often told stories like that. Where you really had no idea what the point was or where it was heading.

Where was I? You’re supposed to keep me on track.

Right. Cock pics. Which seems appropriate for this thread. So I was doing what a lot of excited inexperienced litsers do and jumping in feet first, cock in one hand, phone in the other and typing with my nose. When a female poster that I had occasionally interacted with in the threads sent me a pm. It was flirty and fun, but not serious. Still my favorite type (you might want to take notes at this point, just a heads up).

Then she asked for a pic. But not just any pic, she wanted it to be fun. A decorated cock pic. Which cracked me right the fuck up. This was new! Different! It was funny. You can usually seduce me with humor (humour). Sensual is great, kinky is titillating, but humor (humour) is the best. At least for catching my attention.

Because sex is fun as one of its main attractions. It’s stupid, animalistic and silly. It can move from raw passion to giggles and back in a heartbeat before ending in gasping breath and screams. It’s better than tacos and I don’t say that about msny things.

Where was I?

Decoration.

I’ll get there eventually (you can blame @hotwords229_A and his impatience for the digressions (and this vanpool ride, bumpy as fuck)). Trust me.

I happened to have some card stock on hand at the office and I’m pretty crafty, so I got out the card stock and scissors and made a little sailor hat. I don’t remember if I colored (coloured) it or not with highlighters. If I didn’t, I should have.

Perched that little (not that little! I have a truly magnificent cock, not too big, not too medium, fits just oh so right) hat over the crown and took a quite excellency photo. I said photo because this was no ordinary pic. It was a work of art. Should be hanging in the Louvre. Right beside the Mona Lisa so everyone knows why she’s smiling.

Sent it off with a laugh and a smile. Wondering how she was going to respond and to my surprise… nothing. I chalked it up to time zone differences and didn’t worry about it. Still nothing the next day.

I figured it was just one of those things. Win some, lose some.

Fast forward to last January/February. Life had changed a lot, Covid, remote, cancer, hasn’t been on lit much, but I was checking in more often as stress release and reconnecting with people. Which was great. This community of perverts has brought me a lot of laughs and solace over the last three years. Thank you.

(Pause for tissue use. For tears, not cleanup. Pervert)

I happened upon a discussion about alts and found out that some people had actually shared usernames and passwords. One of those parings was Pmann and the woman who had requested a decorated pic.

I know right?!? I just dropped the punchline after an emotional (emotionaul) paragraph. What kind of asshole does that?

I was outside walking the dog when I realized that Pmann had talked me into decorating my cock and sending him a pic. I laughed so hard. It was hysterical. What a numpty I was (am).

So when Enny said how funny a dick hat would be, I felt I had to share this.

Hat (lol) off to you pmann.

I can’t believe you’ve been hiding this from my dick tricks thread this whole time

 

[AlpineFresco]

Meet anyone from Lit in person?

I have done this with two people and am open to it again.

For sex or friendship?

One for a relationship and one for friendship.

In public for safety?

I haven't been concerned about safety (I'm a guy, the calculations are different) but I'm very open to public setups to ensure other people feel safe.
My romantic connection was less public but still out in public, my platonic meeting was 100% in public.

Bring a friend for safety?

I've not felt the need to do this. If someone I were to meet wanted to that'd be a bit weird, but I can direct them to people I've met if they need references to confirm that I am who I say I am

Share recent full face and body pics first?

I mean, I'm not meeting someone unless I feel I know them somewhat well. Definitely face pic exchange - I need to recognise you!

Who would you most like to meet from Lit (in person) and for what reason?

Who I haven't already met? PLP, we've been friends for years but live many thousands of miles apart, and one day will get a beer.
I don't hear from her so much nowadays but it'd be lovely to catch up in person with Indie also, but again the distance is a real killer.

Do you think the number of Listers who have met and fucked is a high number or low number?

...? Relative to what? As a percentage? I truly don't know. I would imagine probably very few active members have actually physically met someone else from here. Now of those who have, what percentage have fucked? I have nothing to go on, 'cause people form genuine friendships here.

If there was a Literotica in person group meet up, would you go? Would you go with the intention of sex, or curiosity, or sexual curiosity?

Probably not. I prefer smaller gatherings, anything much above 10-ish people feels like a lot to me and it becomes hard to really engage with people.

 

[Apisto42]

I can't quite decide if this was a come on . . . .

Despite what the stick man said, I’m going to refrain from childish comments.

Y'all are the meanest flirters I have ever known.

You should have seen my flirtations with Corbal. Twas not fit for public viewing. Girl was terrifying.

 

[hotwords229_A]

you can blame @hotwords229_A and his impatience for the digressions (and this vanpool ride, bumpy as fuck)

I will gladly take the blame for a story like this!

 

[Endless_Night]

That said, here you go: >

1) You sir, are quite the raconteur.
2) (I laughed so much.)
3) And an excellent sport.
4) That it was ten years later when you realized adds all the icing to the cake.

4) @Lord Pmann, you are such an appendage.

 

[Endless_Night]

Despite what the stick man said, I’m going to refrain from childish comments.

You should have seen my flirtations with Corbal. Twas not fit for public viewing. Girl was terrifying.

Corbal. She once butchered Chained for four solid pages of a thread.

She was a force of nature.

A scary force.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I feel like we are still in need of the other half of the story. Hopefully, Enny can conjure another Pmann appearance.

Also, Corbal is greatly missed. I remember once she was roughing me up and I posted a cute little puppy pic and she melted.

 

[Apisto42]

Corbal. She once butchered Chained for four solid pages of a thread.

She was a force of nature.

A scary force.

I will add that I gave as good as I got. It was a scary love affair of scathing insults.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I happened upon a discussion about alts and found out that some people had actually shared usernames and passwords.

This is pretty fascinating.
How many people share their passwords?
Why?
How can this lead to anything other than seeing Apisto’s sailor hat?

 

[Wand3rlust]

I don't share any of my passwords or alt details.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I don't share any of my passwords or alt details.

We will keep trying to hack you though.

 

[Wand3rlust]

We will keep trying to hack you though.

Ah is THAT what that was....

 

[Wand3rlust]

Kind of like when you hit puberty and discover your new favoUrite toy and companion.

*shakes head*

He wrote humor (“humour” (just in case a particular Brit is reading and wants to put a “wow” reaction on this post she’ll know what I’m saying)) pieces for Field & Stream

Bless your heart.

One of his favoUrite characters often told stories like that.

*sighs*

Right. Cock pics.

*perks up*

Which seems appropriate for this thread. So I was doing what a lot of excited inexperienced litsers do and jumping in feet first, cock in one hand, phone in the other and typing with my nose. When a female poster that I had occasionally interacted with in the threads sent me a pm. It was flirty and fun, but not serious. Still my favorite type (you might want to take notes at this point, just a heads up).

*notes*

Then she asked for a pic. But not just any pic, she wanted it to be fun. A decorated cock pic. Which cracked me right the fuck up. This was new! Different! It was funny. You can usually seduce me with humor (humour). Sensual is great, kinky is titillating, but humor (humour) is the best. At least for catching my attention.

happened to have some card stock on hand at the office and I’m pretty crafty, so I got out the card stock and scissors and made a little sailor hat. I don’t remember if I colored (coloured) it or not with highlighters.

I appreciate your efforts. You've always been my favoUrite.

 

[Lord Pmann]

That said, here you go:

I’m never sure on a story like this whether to lead with the punch line or the background. But I suppose I should start with the way I lived it so you can relive the same emotions I experienced (or at least a poor facsimile of said emotions).

It was somewhere around 2016 or 2017, which I can only date loosely because I happen to remember where my cubicle was in the office at the time. I had recently switched positions (got a coveted window cube, yay for me, small wins right?). Lit was also fairly new for me posting regularly in the PG, so it was like a bright shiny new toy. Kind of like when you hit puberty and discover your new favorite toy and companion. You go all in and lose your mind a bit and do stupid shit.

So I had met several woman by this time and experienced the joy of sharing pics and flirting outrageously, sometimes fairly quickly, others being a slow burn. I had not really interacted much with @Lord Pmann though so I didn’t know how he operated.

I also was only on lit three days a week while I was commuting. And only during certain hours of the day. Unlike a lot of lit, the PG has a community of people that form some pretty tight groups it seems to me. It’s easy to find a few threads and people that you interact with easily and it fills your lit time, so it can actually become a bit insular.

Which is a long way to say that I was not aware of all the existing connections between various posters.

You might think at this point I’ve gone off tangent, like an old man telling a story where he starts one story, then works backward to the beginning of time and slowly over the course of three or four hours meanders back to the present day. Which reminds of the book I’m currently reading by Patrick Manus. I read a lot of his books when I was young. He wrote humor (“humour” (just in case a particular Brit is reading and wants to put a “wow” reaction on this post she’ll know what I’m saying)) pieces for Field & Stream. One of his favorite characters often told stories like that. Where you really had no idea what the point was or where it was heading.

Where was I? You’re supposed to keep me on track.

Right. Cock pics. Which seems appropriate for this thread. So I was doing what a lot of excited inexperienced litsers do and jumping in feet first, cock in one hand, phone in the other and typing with my nose. When a female poster that I had occasionally interacted with in the threads sent me a pm. It was flirty and fun, but not serious. Still my favorite type (you might want to take notes at this point, just a heads up).

Then she asked for a pic. But not just any pic, she wanted it to be fun. A decorated cock pic. Which cracked me right the fuck up. This was new! Different! It was funny. You can usually seduce me with humor (humour). Sensual is great, kinky is titillating, but humor (humour) is the best. At least for catching my attention.

Because sex is fun as one of its main attractions. It’s stupid, animalistic and silly. It can move from raw passion to giggles and back in a heartbeat before ending in gasping breath and screams. It’s better than tacos and I don’t say that about many things.

Where was I?

Decoration.

I’ll get there eventually (you can blame @hotwords229_A and his impatience for the digressions (and this vanpool ride, bumpy as fuck)). Trust me.

I happened to have some card stock on hand at the office and I’m pretty crafty, so I got out the card stock and scissors and made a little sailor hat. I don’t remember if I colored (coloured) it or not with highlighters. If I didn’t, I should have.

Perched that little (not that little! I have a truly magnificent cock, not too big, not too medium, fits just oh so right) hat over the crown and took a quite excellenct photo. I said photo because this was no ordinary pic. It was a work of art. Should be hanging in the Louvre. Right beside the Mona Lisa so everyone knows why she’s smiling.

Sent it off with a laugh and a smile. Wondering how she was going to respond and to my surprise… nothing. I chalked it up to time zone differences and didn’t worry about it. Still nothing the next day.

I figured it was just one of those things. Win some, lose some.

Fast forward to last January/February. Life had changed a lot, Covid, remote, cancer, hadn’t been on lit much, but I was checking in more often as stress release and reconnecting with people. Which was great. This community of perverts has brought me a lot of laughs and solace over the last three years. Thank you.

(Pause for tissue use. For tears, not cleanup. Pervert)

I happened upon a discussion about alts and found out that some people had actually shared usernames and passwords. One of those parings was Pmann and the woman who had requested a decorated pic.

I know right?!? I just dropped the punchline after an emotional (emotionaul) paragraph. What kind of asshole does that?

I was outside walking the dog when I realized that Pmann had talked me into decorating my cock and sending him a pic. I laughed so hard. It was hysterical. What a numpty I was (am).

So when Enny said how funny a dick hat would be, I felt I had to share this.

Hat (lol) off to you pmann.

Next to @aussiegeekygal , no one has made a stronger attempt to get my approval on their genitals than this. He dressed it up in a little hat and everything. But Aussie got a vegetation management crew out to trim hers.

I honestly completely forgot about this instance until Apisto reminded me. The only thing I could think of as to why I did this specific request... I once dressed my hat up like the Pope. I made a (very large) pope hat. I don't know why. Sometimes I'm like a child.

I suppose it was a super dick move. Especially to ask for it and not even respond. But that was probably part of the humour. Like, you have a weird request. But then you say nothing. Just silence.

It's nice to know I was that clever 10 years ago, just as I am today.

 

[Endless_Night]

I feel like we are still in need of the other half of the story. Hopefully, Enny can conjure another Pmann appearance.

Also, Corbal is greatly missed. I remember once she was roughing me up and I posted a cute little puppy pic and she melted.

Clever, Muscles. Very clever.

And roughing up is the most excellent term ever for Corbal's interactions. She once said she'd been raised with three brothers. I cannot even imagine that household!

I will add that I gave as good as I got. It was a scary love affair of scathing insults.

That, sir, is impressive.

 

[Endless_Night]

-I don't share any of my passwords or alt details.

*fist bump*

How many people share their passwords?
Why?
How can this lead to anything other than seeing Apisto’s sailor hat?

-
-
-

Also, my passwords will be immolated with my cold, dead body.

 

[Endless_Night]

But Aussie got a vegetation management crew our to trim hers.

It's so, so, SO wrong. But I have to laugh.



Sorry @aussiegeekygal.

It's nice to know I was that clever 10 years ago, just as I am today.

There are things I want to know.

1) Did he do a good job with the hat?
2) What did the person's account that you used have to say about these shenanigans?
3) Did you keep the picture?

 

[Endless_Night]

It's so, so, SO wrong. But I have to laugh.



Sorry @aussiegeekygal.

Damn it! I forgot the user names links won't change color!

 

[Apisto42]

Sometimes I'm like a child.

Sometimes? Whatever you say dude.

It's nice to know I was that clever 10 years ago, just as I am today.

Yep. Right. Just as clever as a the child you’re like.

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

Also, Corbal is greatly missed. I remember once she was roughing me up and I posted a cute little puppy pic and she melted.

Did you ever learn of her alts? She had one that was