[UK] 51yo Male Dom seeks inquisitive Female sub for sensual/mental play and nurturing

[Mindfondler]

As subsequently posted below:

I wish that I could change the subject and content of this advert now. I can see that others have done a much better job of summarising their similar offers — and have received many bites of interest — without resorting to the level of unnecessary detail that I've included.

Fundamentally, I would like to look after someone, ideally with the possibility of meeting offline. The nurturing part is central and the BDSM aspect is secondary — it's not essential to be submissive as an occasional play partner might also fit the bill.

I wonder whether that makes any difference​

Mrs MF and I have previously run joint adverts that have drawn interest from lots of male subs but no female subs at all, so I've been targetting the latter with my own advert. I can only assume that any interested female subs felt too nervous to respond to the original version, so in my revised advert here I've added extra reassurances, safety clauses and additional helpful information.

Any nibbles of interest or items of constructive feedback are most welcome! If nothing else, I'd be grateful to know whether my advert is coherent, and perhaps get some constructive pointers on where I might be going wrong. At the moment, I'm operating in a vacuum!


Who am I?

I'm a straight male Dom from London, UK with a long-standing passion for gentle sensual play, caring domination and kinky nurturing. My wife and I have been exploring BDSM for just over a year. We play regularly together, and we're now both seeking to branch out in new directions.

One of my ambitions is to extend my repertoire of sensual play, both with my wife and with other subs. I have been trained in Indian Head Massage and I'd like to explore using those skills in conjunction with BDSM techniques to provide a rich sensual and mental experience. It fascinates me that each person responds differently to the same stimuli, and I enjoy the challenge of discovering what works best for an individual.

I'm therefore seeking female subjects in and around London, UK who are interested in sharing explorations into these domains.

I'm also keen to nurture a sub who lacks confidence in some area that I can help with. I view self-confidence as a seed that needs to be grown (i.e., it can't be "given") by feeding it and watering it in the right ways and at the appropriate intervals. I'd like to be the person who makes a difference by providing that at first and then, over time, encouraging the sub to feed and water themselves.​

Who might you be?

• You are a young lady in or around London, UK.
• Perhaps you are already accomplished and independent, but you feel that something is missing.
• You are aware that you have a submissive side but you might lack the means to express it.
• You would like to explore submission more, but without entering a new full-on physical relationship.
• Maybe you are curious about your local BDSM community but anxious about approaching it on your own.

My motivation

I'm aware that I face an uphill struggle to persuade even the most intrigued female readers to overcome their scepticism and contact me. Please let me try, though...

Let me be clear: I am not seeking to have sex with you! I have no need for that. The pleasure that I seek here stems from the meeting of minds more than physical aspects.

I'm a gentle, caring guy who gets fulfilment from nurturing: helping others to grow and to learn to fly for themselves. I know that it takes time to build trust, understanding and confidence to that level, but I'm patient.

I'm realistic that not everyone who shows an initial interest will turn out to be compatible. It's simply not possible to cover that off in a short advert! The only way to find out is to make contact and communicate openly. If things don't work out and one of us decides to pull the plug, then that's okay — at least we tried and perhaps we learnt more about ourselves in the process.

I'm still learning my trade as a Dom, and I'm proud of that as I don't believe that I should ever stop trying to improve. I don't pretend to have all of the answers, but I'm a keen researcher. Others tell me that I'm good at listening, encouraging and challenging (in a positive way).

I'd like you to meet my wife and my other friends at local munches so that you can hear more about me directly from them. Any subsequent play between us would be at the play events advertised on Fetlife that these people also attend.

I'm happy to answer any other questions. If you prefer not to send me a private message, then please add a comment under my advert and I'll answer it publicly.

Although I've deliberately written this advert in a serious tone, I have an off-beat sense of humour that's rarely out of the action. I find it difficult to keep a straight face whilst Domming! I enjoy sharing laughter at the sheer ridiculousness of many BDSM predicaments. With the right people, I'm capable of being deliciously wicked! ​

Summary

I'd love to help an inquisitive lady sub to explore and express her submissive side safely and freely, with a blend of sensual play and mind fondling! If you think that could be you, then we can chat more about it. If you let me inside your head, then I'll do my best to unlock the mysteries inside!​

About tinglebliss and Me

My wife helped me to compose this advert and is keen for me to pursue this ambition of mine. I'd like to keep her involved in any follow-ups to my advert (including any initial meetings). I hope that's okay, and a source of reassurance. She's lovely, by the way! ​

Interested? Want to know more? (modified for Lit forum readers)

• Check out my profile
• Visit the Meet Mr and Mrs MF thread
• Read our joint personals advert
• Get in touch! I'd love to hear from you.

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[Mindfondler]

I had some fantastic sensory and mental domination play with Mrs MF yesterday afternoon, and Mrs MF had a second opportunity later on with a male friend.

I can't believe that nobody else out there is interested in sharing a similar experience with me.
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[Mindfondler]

I've added a couple of further clarifications to my advert (shown in Navy Blue text above) based on some feedback received on it (thanks!).
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[Rainbow_Magic]

Well if i were in London i'd be bashing your door down. Good luck with finding someone xx

 

[JessicaRabbit93]

I've read a few of the posts you've made about this and some part of me finds it a very intriguing proposition! However I doubt I'd have the confidence to become involved

On a side note, your advert is indeed coherent and a great read! I wish you luck ^_^

 

[Mindfondler]

Well if i were in London i'd be bashing your door down. Good luck with finding someone xx

I've read a few of the posts you've made about this and some part of me finds it a very intriguing proposition! However I doubt I'd have the confidence to become involved

On a side note, your advert is indeed coherent and a great read! I wish you luck ^_^

Thanks very much for your warm wishes. I'm pleased to hear that I'm offering something that's potentially of interest "out there" if the geography is right.

I hope that you're both able to fulfil your own needs very soon.

For those in the south of the UK:

I will be at the London Munch this Friday with Mrs MF. I'd be happy to have a chat there with anyone who'd like to know more about the background to this advert (or, indeed, anything else). Please feel free to drop me a PM asking me to look out for you.
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[Mindfondler]

Further to the above, I had a great time this evening at the London Munch where I chatted to a wide range of kinksters and I helped Mrs MF to promote a kink event of her own. Nobody asked about my own advert (as above), though. I guess it's a long shot here, but I'll try again...

I will be at the Gatwick Munch this Friday (2nd Sept) and London Alternative Market (LAM) next Sunday (4th Sept) with Mrs MF. Once again, I'd be happy to have a face-to-face chat with anyone who'd like to know more about the background to this advert (or, indeed, anything else). Please feel free to drop me a Private Message asking me to look out for you.

Otherwise, I'm still seeking any expressions of interest, questions or constructive comments, either as replies in this thread or by Private Message.

*crosses fingers once again*
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[Mindfondler]

I wish that I could change the subject and content of this advert now. I can see that others have done a much better job of summarising their similar offers — and have received many bites of interest — without resorting to the level of unnecessary detail that I've included above.

Fundamentally, I would like to look after someone, ideally with the possibility of meeting offline. The nurturing part is central and the BDSM aspect is secondary — it's not essential to be submissive as an occasional play partner might also fit the bill.

I wonder whether that makes any difference — or, indeed, whether anyone will read this footnote.
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