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The Structure of a Limerick

It is the easiest form of wit,
Limericks tax not the brain a bit,
Two lines in rhyme,
Then different time,
You add one more, that's all of it!
 
there can be something lost in translation between accents in english and american english, and even between regional american accents. threw me for a loop reading some of the pieces that read 'wrong' to my british ear

a limerick's satan's own folly
no umbrella term, more a brolly
to cover the pain
of a butt-naked brain
pushing rhymes in a squeaky-wheeled trolley
 
A limerick, while normally in anapestic meter, can be written in amphibrachs (a metrical foot that is a stressed syllable surrounded by two unstressed syllables). I find it kind of fun to write something consistently amphibrachic, like this:

There was a young lady from London
Who longed to be chained in a dungeon
She thought she'd be whipped on
But found she was spit on
By some old disgusting curmudgeon.
​
But then I like crossword puzzles too. :rolleyes:
 
Continued from above...
​
The scene, having left her quite woozy,​
She hoped that she wasn't a floozy—​
That base degradation​
Evoked such elation​
She bathed in it like a jacuzzi.​
​
 
...

Experience varies so widely.
Let none of you look at her snidely.
That, drenched in saliva
While clothed like Godiva,
Is not to be treated too idly.
​
 
...

At least she now knows what is needed
To get herself off unimpeded—
Some chains and some spittle,
An old guy and it'll
Be Orgasm City exceeded.
​
 
there was a prim lady from Bude
whom no-one had seen in the nude
there'll be no denying
of gents trying spying
but all gave her up as a prude
 
it's said there's a man from Dry Wood
with balls made of brass and he should
perform quite a jingle
when wagging his dingle
as many men would if they could
 
when counting a limerick's beats
some tap with their fingers or feets
a sheik preferred nipples
as told by the ripples
of laughs in the harem, discreet
 
a Dom got his subbie quite drunk
then poured her a cocktail of spunk
he ordered her "Drink!
Just swallow, don't think!"
so she did—an impressive slam dunk
 
This is starting to look like a Battle of the Bands...

When butters is rhyming so spritely
I have to respond, though politely.
I try to be clever
Which works out, like, never.
Perhaps I'll just bow out contritely.
​
 
Tzara said:
This is starting to look like a Battle of the Bands...
​
When butters is rhyming so spritely​
I have to respond, though politely.​
I try to be clever​
Which works out, like, never.​
Perhaps I'll just bow out contritely.​
​
Click to expand...
no battle, it's more like addiction
the limerick bug's my confliction
i try not to start
cos i know i will fart
a mess lacking any conviction
 
a young man whose thing was an ankle
got terribly cross; he was rankled
by ladies in jeans
or boots tall and clean
so grew older, awfully crankled

Definition of Crankle​

  • (v. t.) To break into bends, turns, or angles; to crinkle.
  • (v. i.) To bend, turn, or wind.
  • (n.) A bend or turn; a twist; a crinkle.
Click to expand...
 
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a woman renown for her cunning
and cruelty—her brand of funning
was ever so glad
and never too sad
and tortured her beaus with bad punning
 
a gentleman ever so tall
liked ceilings raised high on their walls
his noggin protected
in sex acts elected
for bumping his swollen bound balls
 
a lad born with tongue twice the length
was encouraged to find it a strength
and now all the wimmen
delight in his strimmin'
though speaking's still somewhat a wrength
 
A girl in a bright yellow dress
Stirred a teacup of marital stress
Her legs at eleven
Took husbands to heaven
But their wives wouldn't clean up the mess
 
A hitchhiking Texan dressed up as LA Laker
was picked up by Serial Anne, they called Widowmaker
she rode 'em hard till their heart said bye
But six hours gone, she wondered: Why?
Sorry, gal, I don't get off in a pink Studebaker
 
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