eastern sun
hungry little creature
- Joined
- Nov 19, 2005
- Posts
- 2,703
It is perhaps hard to believe but I have never compared my two Dominant's styles or "Domliness", both because they are in two totally different domains and levels (one being a Sadist and the other more of a Sensualist), but mostly because the two relationships are just different both in scope and time I can dedicate to them.
Yes, I might notice and get upset or dissatisfied with Hubby's shortcoming, but that is just part of a growing relationship and never for a moment I felt that I could get what I do not get from Hubby from someone else. Only Hubby can provide what Hubby can provide. If it makes any sense.
I just found out that it has been (and it is) more Hubby that compares himself with the Sadist and believes I don't need his style of Dominance. What came out from a discussion I had with him is it has been him that has not seen himself as Dominant due to lack of "Domly" activities. While I realized that deep inside, as I wrote above, submissive is just the way I am and feel within the marriage and it does not need any specific actions.
I have always suspected that you were smarter than me. This confirms it.
We reached the same conclusions you and your Hubby did in the end, but I had to learn it the hard way over a rocky, and somewhat treacherous, road. In the process, I discovered a very mean and dismissive side of me that I don't like at all.