The Isolated Blurt BDSM Thread

[Oubliette123]

Seeing a poster of a missing/stolen dog this morning. The person requesting help described the thief as 'having a gypsy accent'. In those three words the author tarred the whole community with the same brush and has sown the seeds of discrimination. I wonder if they chose those words because they couldn't get away with saying 'he looked like a gypsy'?

It just makes me mad when certain groups of people are singled out time and time again

 

[Inflicto]

Yep its a form of racism

 

[Loverskitten]

Wow, what a difference! Reading glasses when using my iPhone. I'm old.

 

[the captians wench]

God a love a good ass fuck to start my week.

 

[Ropebunny]

I must finish cataloguing the Playcentre library by Friday night. I got 3/4 of the way through a year and a half ago but have been too lazy to finish the job. The boy starts school on next week and we've had our leaving ceremony so I really should have finished this a long time ago.

But catching up on all the threads I've missed here is so much more pleasurable, albeit unproductive!


Gosh, how I've missed everyone here! Glad to see you are all well.

 

[Dianthus]

[vent]

I wish one of my friends would stop leaving us-girls-have-girl-power-affirming-comments on my facebook. Especially not while she knows I don't feel female inside.

'You are a woman. Period. So new shoes are your right'

Under a picture of black leather hiking boots. On me.

Girl, please.

[/vent]

I feel female right down to my bones and I'm pretty repulsed by the idea that new shoes are my 'right'.

I believe that I have rights. I never considered shoes among them and resent having them trivialized.

 

[graceanne]

I feel female right down to my bones and I'm pretty repulsed by the idea that new shoes are my 'right'.

I believe that I have rights. I never considered shoes among them and resent having them trivialized.

Yeah, ditto. Not to mention that I rarely wear anything but sandals. Why is that because some females are crazy about shoes that mean we all should be? I don't assume that because new nail polish makes me happy that it will make all women happy. It's just so freaken obnoxious and is, to a lesser degree, up there with the view point that all women are the same and therefore all women want to have get married, have babies, obsess (sp?) over shoes, and eat chocolate covered bonbon's while watching soap operas.

And this is coming from someone who's happy doing 3/5 of the above mentioned things.

 

[seela]

After spending a year in a place where I had close to zero social life of my own, I must say friends are pretty awesome. Especially ones that feed you when you have no motivation to cook just for yourself.

 

[ecstaticsub]

I don't usually rant but..

Helicopter parents have become my new daily giggle. My daughter is starting at an expensive liberal arts college this fall. It is a fantastic school and in many ways fits her perfectly. Thanks to a very generous merit scholarship we are able to send her.

I belong to the schools freshman family facebook group. I can not believe some of the things these parents post. They are asking if the closets have room for a shoe rack for their son, how big the closets are, whether their child should have a laptop and desk top or should all kids have tablets. What size fan should they buy for their child.

OMG, people! Your child is at least 18. Let them make their own decisions. If they have questions, let them get their own answers from the FB group made for them. Don't go shopping for them, maybe with them, maybe. I remember the summer before my freshman year waiting until the week before classes started before I (not my parents) went shopping with a bunch of friends once we had made enough money over the summer. It was so much fun. Parents, stop micromanaging your kids.

ok, rant over.

 

[wicked woman]

I don't usually rant but..

Helicopter parents have become my new daily giggle. My daughter is starting at an expensive liberal arts college this fall. It is a fantastic school and in many ways fits her perfectly. Thanks to a very generous merit scholarship we are able to send her.

I belong to the schools freshman family facebook group. I can not believe some of the things these parents post. They are asking if the closets have room for a shoe rack for their son, how big the closets are, whether their child should have a laptop and desk top or should all kids have tablets. What size fan should they buy for their child.

OMG, people! Your child is at least 18. Let them make their own decisions. If they have questions, let them get their own answers from the FB group made for them. Don't go shopping for them, maybe with them, maybe. I remember the summer before my freshman year waiting until the week before classes started before I (not my parents) went shopping with a bunch of friends once we had made enough money over the summer. It was so much fun. Parents, stop micromanaging your kids.

ok, rant over.

I remember many years ago when one of my sons was starting university, attending a parents' session put on by the school. I was shocked at how unprepared their children were. From their parents' comments, these kids didn't know how to do their own laundry, cook their meals or get themselves around town and to classes! I wanted to ask the parents what they had been doing for the last 18 years.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

I remember many years ago when one of my sons was starting university, attending a parents' session put on by the school. I was shocked at how unprepared their children were. From their parents' comments, these kids didn't know how to do their own laundry, cook their meals or get themselves around town and to classes! I wanted to ask the parents what they had been doing for the last 18 years.

When I began going to university, not immediately after high school, but after two years in the navy and three years wandering around the country mostly on my own, I was continually amused by the fresh-out-of-high-school freshmen who couldn't even read the campus maps to find their dorms, cafeterias and classrooom buildings... despite signs all over campus pointing the directions to (i.e.)

• Alpha-Beta-Gamma dorms
• Student Center
• A-B-G cafeteria
• Social Sciences Classroom Buildings
• etc.

More than once, I stood in front of the Student Center saying, "See, this building has a sign that says, 'Student Center,' and that one's sign [pointing] says 'Alpha dorm.' If you line the map up with the two of those in that same relationship, then the Social Sciences buildings will be [pointing again] that way. See? Just like on the map!"

ETA: Strangely enough, *physical* science majors (& physical science major wanna-bes) almost never had problems of this sort... only Social Sci, Education (except for History/Geography majors, lol!), Psych, etc.

 

[ecstaticsub]

I remember many years ago when one of my sons was starting university, attending a parents' session put on by the school. I was shocked at how unprepared their children were. From their parents' comments, these kids didn't know how to do their own laundry, cook their meals or get themselves around town and to classes! I wanted to ask the parents what they had been doing for the last 18 years.

Exactly! I admit to being a little nervous sending her off on her own, but I have faith that she will be just fine. I know she will make mistakes, maybe get lost or oversleep for a class. She may not budget her money perfectly. But she will figure things out and she will survive. She also knows that if she really needs me I am just a phone call (or text) away.

When I began going to university, not immediately after high school, but after two years in the navy and three years wandering around the country mostly on my own, I was continually amused by the fresh-out-of-high-school freshmen who couldn't even read the campus maps to find their dorms, cafeterias and classrooom buildings... despite signs all over campus pointing the directions to (i.e.)

• Alpha-Beta-Gamma dorms
• Student Center
• A-B-G cafeteria
• Social Sciences Classroom Buildings
• etc.

More than once, I stood in front of the Student Center saying, "See, this building has a sign that says, 'Student Center,' and that one's sign [pointing] says 'Alpha dorm.' If you line the map up with the two of those in that same relationship, then the Social Sciences buildings will be [pointing again] that way. See? Just like on the map!"

ETA: Strangely enough, *physical* science majors (& physical science major wanna-bes) almost never had problems of this sort... only Social Sci, Education (except for History/Geography majors, lol!), Psych, etc.

They must have been kids who were never given the chance to find there own way around as teens.

OTOH, when I try to explain something to my son he waves me off and says don't worry mom, I can look it up on the internet. LOL

 

[Sir_Winston54]

OTOH, when I try to explain something to my son he waves me off and says don't worry mom, I can look it up on the internet. LOL

I have to admit, these freshmen couldn't do that - not in 1970-1971...

 

[CutieMouse]

When The Boy and I toured his university last March, the people running the prospective students weekend had to "urge parents to please let your children explore campus, on their own." I looked at The Boy & his (16 old) sister, and told them to check in by text every 2 hours; I had financial aid seminars to deal with.

School starts in a month, and he's responsible for bringing me a list of wants/needs to discuss, figuring out immunizations, etc. As I told him a few months ago - Life is full of mistakes. I'm here to rescue you, but only if necessary.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

When The Boy and I toured his university last March, the people running the prospective students weekend had to "urge parents to please let your children explore campus, on their own." I looked at The Boy & his (16 old) sister, and told them to check in by text every 2 hours; I had financial aid seminars to deal with.

School starts in a month, and he's responsible for bringing me a list of wants/needs to discuss, figuring out immunizations, etc. As I told him a few months ago - Life is full of mistakes. I'm here to rescue you, but only if necessary.

You are raising young people who will become self-sufficient young adults of whom you will be proud. I wish there were a lot more of you around.

 

[cfuhrer]

Can I be the picked-up-after for a bit?
I'm kind of tired of being the picker-upper

 

[seela]

ES's post touched a subject that's been annoying me for weeks now.

My nephew's 12 and he visited us a couple of weeks ago for a weekend, and he really seemed to enjoy the little visit. But afterwards my sister completely lost it, when she heard what we had done.

First, the amusement park. Apparently I shouldn't have let him go on all the rides he wanted to go to (and was sufficiently tall and old to go to, I might add). That was really, really, superduper irresponsible of me, and she really made it clear to me. He loved everything he did that day, but clearly that didn't matter.

But the thing that really made my sister have a hissy fit was when I told her that her son had *gasp* COOKED! "But there are all kinds of sharp things involved in cooking, oil splashing, water boiling, he basically could have killed himself cooking!" Yeeeeeah. I didn't really know what to say to that. Clearly cooking has become a lot more dangerous over the years, because I know for a fact that she was cooking and baking at that age, as was I, and we did quite alright. Eventually mom got her to calm down, but man, she really was livid about that cooking thing.

How stupid does she think her son is? Is it really that strange for a 12-year-old to cook? I chopped the onion, because it was making him cry, but he chopped the other incredients for the tomato sauce (ok, I made the dice a bit finer), he made the meatballs (baked in the oven, no hot oils involved) and cooked spaghetti. I helped, of course, and I made sure he doesn't kill or maim himself in the process, but he really did most of the cooking and liked it, too.

It just annoys me every time to see parents not let their kids do anything themselves! I mean, it's not like I'm trying to advocate child labor, but shouldn't a 12-year-old be allowed to slice their own bread and tomato for a sandwich? Well, my nephew isn't, because my sister thinks he'll chop off all his fingers in the process. He couldn't even peel potatoes when he went to school, because my sister had always done it for him! I mean, damn, the kids (and parents) these days.

 

[ecstaticsub]

seela, that would annoy me, too.

My son has been helping me cook since he was old enough to pull up a chair to the stove and stir pudding, sauce, soup, whatever, which was about when he was 3 yrs old. If your sister isn't cooking with her son she is missing an excellent opportunity to spend time with him while teaching him valuable life skills.

The conversations that come up during cooking especially in the teen years will be even more important than the actual cooking.

I do hope for your nephew's sake your sister changes her ways.

 

[Keroin]

Helicopter parents...

When L and I worked on The Rock, our little adventure resort attracted a lot of newly graduated university students who were traveling for a few months (sometimes a year) before settling down into "real life". We were absolutely gobsmacked at how the vast majority of these young people were unable to care for themselves.

They were traveling around the world and did not think to bring an alarm clock, a hat, sunglasses, etc. I don't mean they forgot to pack these items, they simply did not consider they would be necessary. No sunglasses, in the tropics?

One young fellow actually arrived and then the next day stood in our common area looking at me, utterly confused. "So... what should I do?" he asked. Dudes, the beach was 30 feet away. A beautiful, sandy beach with warm water, coral, colourful fish, etc. Is this rocket science? Not to mention the huge book that was sitting right in front of him that had a list of all the sights and activities on the island.

Has this generation been rendered so inept that they do not even know how to take a vacation on the beach?

And on the other end of the spectrum, you have the kids I know who were fishing, chopping wood, building fires, hunting, and canoeing before their 13th birthdays. So all hope is not lost.

 

[Oubliette123]

It cotton wool culture!

Years ago I worked as a kitchen assistant for a small tearoom where everything was prepared on site. It was a small concern and this particular day I was in the kitchen working and I asked the waitress (who was about 17) to shell some eggs for me, to make an egg mayo sandwich. 10 mins later she still hadn't done it, so I went to find her and to my utter amusement she was chipping away at it with a knife! I asked her what she was doing and she explained she had never 'peeled and egg before'.

When I had my children I vowed I would never let them leave my house to move out until they could do the basics, cooking, washing, cleaning and general DIY. It would embarrass me as a mother to see my kids struggle when they first set out in life!

Thankfully they are pretty independent, even down to things like working out bus/train times, going places on their own, working cash point machines etc. I'm no mother monster but I have made sure they are able to think for themselves at the age of 12 and 14. Cooking is such an enjoyable thing to do with kids, its quality time imo

 

[Netzach]

I had it pretty soft and easy because my one job in school was to bring home the best marks possible. It was my function in life, so the idea of an after school job was completely out of the question.

And my family hovered and drove me batshit insane, so I'll say that the saving grace is that no, these people will actually be able to learn to wipe their own ass in the wider world. Bounce some checks and you learn not to fairly quickly.

Make horrible vegan bean paste enough times and you decide you're going to read a book to learn how to make flavors.

I don't know how to clean a fish or buy a house, or fix a sink. I'm a bit annoyed at some of the gaps in my basics, but to be fair, 3 generations of NYC renters are going to have a different set of skills. I know how to avoid a fucked up situation, and I'm better at discerning a fucked up situation from just some basic street dysfunction. Mass transit is always my friend. I know how to eat *well* for fast food prices almost anywhere.

My mother was the OG of helicopter parenting.

If kids only got what their parents gave them, the world would be a lot worse.

 

[seela]

Whew, I'm glad I'm normal in thinking that my sister is not normal with her paranoia about knives and boiling water. At least in a couple of years my nephew will be having home ec in school and then my sister will definitely have no reason to not let him in the kitchen. Or maybe she's just expecting someone else to teach the basics. I don't know.

My sister's 12 years older than I am and we've never been too close. We're the complete opposites in so many ways and I often find it really difficult to understand her way of thinking and doing things. So I guess it makes sense that we have completely opposite ideas of kids cooking, too.

Oh, and the irony of ironies -- she was a professional chef for many years until she switched careers about 5 years ago. Cobblers, children, lacking footwear.

Ranting about stupid college students feels wrong because I'm still one myself, but Keroin, that story about the guy who didn't know how to be on vacation has got to be the most idiotic thing I've heard in ages! (It also made me want to go somewhere where there are colorful fish and pretty coral, too.)

 

[Netzach]

Whew, I'm glad I'm normal in thinking that my sister is not normal with her paranoia about knives and boiling water. At least in a couple of years my nephew will be having home ec in school and then my sister will definitely have no reason to not let him in the kitchen. Or maybe she's just expecting someone else to teach the basics. I don't know.

My sister's 12 years older than I am and we've never been too close. We're the complete opposites in so many ways and I often find it really difficult to understand her way of thinking and doing things. So I guess it makes sense that we have completely opposite ideas of kids cooking, too.

Oh, and the irony of ironies -- she was a professional chef for many years until she switched careers about 5 years ago. Cobblers, children, lacking footwear.

Ranting about stupid college students feels wrong because I'm still one myself, but Keroin, that story about the guy who didn't know how to be on vacation has got to be the most idiotic thing I've heard in ages! (It also made me want to go somewhere where there are colorful fish and pretty coral, too.)

If she was a pro, she's thinking of commercial kitchens and all the accidents therein, and she's being silly for that reason, but maybe slightly less silly because commercial kitchens are not a place for a kid, for all those reasons. She needs to realize that you're not moving at breakneck speed and the simpler you start him off the better. "We made pasta today" involves just one or two hazards.

 

[Keroin]

If kids only got what their parents gave them, the world would be a lot worse.

Agreed. And, to be fair, these kids probably learned more on their vacations than they did in all their years at home and in school.

Ranting about stupid college students feels wrong because I'm still one myself, but Keroin, that story about the guy who didn't know how to be on vacation has got to be the most idiotic thing I've heard in ages! (It also made me want to go somewhere where there are colorful fish and pretty coral, too.)

It was pretty funny. And sad at the same time. I guess I also have to realize that the lens through which I view the world is coloured by being Mrs. MacGyver.

You think I'm bad? I'm actually kind. You should hear L rant about the general uselessness of young folks. Yikes.

 

[seela]

If she was a pro, she's thinking of commercial kitchens and all the accidents therein, and she's being silly for that reason, but maybe slightly less silly because commercial kitchens are not a place for a kid, for all those reasons. She needs to realize that you're not moving at breakneck speed and the simpler you start him off the better. "We made pasta today" involves just one or two hazards.

Yep, my kitchen (and hers) have very little in common with commercial kitchens. No hot oils swooshing in weird place here, at least not when there's anyone in the kitchen with me. When I'm alone, I'm a klutz and manage to find new ways to hurt myself all too often.

It was pretty funny. And sad at the same time. I guess I also have to realize that the lens through which I view the world is coloured by being Mrs. MacGyver.

You think I'm bad? I'm actually kind. You should hear L rant about the general uselessness of young folks. Yikes.

I'm still kinda jealous of your Mrs. MacGyver-ness.

I didn't mean your rant was bad or reading/hearing people rant about college students is bad. I just feel bad when I rant about them, because it makes me feel all kinds of holier than thou.

I find it somewhat alarming, that I complain about the uselessness of young folks and I'm not even 30 myself. I'm going to be a horrible old lady one day.