On reviewing aka the EmilyMiller review

[Omenainen]

[No personal attacks, including creating threads to single out another author. Heated discussions are fine, even welcome. However, personally attacking / kink-shaming a fellow author or reader is not allowed within the Author's Hangout. Threads which devolve into the exchanging of insults will be closed and repeat offenders will be given a timeout, per the AH rules.]

 

[AwkwardlySet]

I am considering making a long post to touch on some of the issues and challenges of what you and AwkwardMD are doing, and to offer my opinion and some suggestions for the future. I don't intend to make this about Em's story at all. I didn't read the story and I don't intend to read it or contest the points you have made about that story. It is not my intention to review your review but to review the reviewing process in general. I believe I have a fairly balanced opinion on this subject. I also believe there are things you should improve in your approach. Of course, your thread and your reviewing process are your own, yet we keep pointing out the community aspect of all this, so that is why I am considering offering some insight that might benefit you and your potential reviewees. (BTW, this is not a community in my opinion, so I am using this term for the lack of a better one. I also have no clue if 'reviewee' is an actual word. Grammarly thinks it is not)
I still haven't decided about actually writing it as I really do want to let things settle down first, even if someone always keeps perpetuating this issue, one way or another. I am also not sure I am in the mood to write about these things.

Anyway, to conclude this with a question. Were I to write such a post, where would you rather have it, here or in your own thread? Or not at all?

 

[onehitwanda]

Is it not perhaps time to leave the dead where they have fallen? I feel like enough damage has been done from this topic and maybe we should all just try to learn something from it.

 

[KeithD]

Is it not perhaps time to leave the dead where they have fallen? I feel like enough damage has been done from this topic and maybe we should all just try to learn something from it.

I'm not sure that some "get it" on what the real concern/message is yet.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

A Post Review: I'm considering something, but there's a 99% chance I won't go through with it. Where would you prefer me not to proceed?"

It is a matter of timing, mostly.
By the way, how is life treating you? Did you consider appealing your case rather than lurking with alts? Just a thought.

 

[BobbyBrandt]

The one thing outside the story that we look for is the author’s “Lit experience”, evaluated by the amount of stories posted. If asked to review someone’s first story (or close to it), we are more lenient on the content and more likely to offer advice on categories and other site mechanics. While I do think all reviews should theoretically have the same approach, I think first-time authors (or close to it) deserve more encouragement than the story itself might warrant. On the other hand, I think that a more accomplished author benefits from an in-depth approach as opposed to “really nice, keep it up, I came.” I don’t think anyone benefits from feedback that is not honest.

I believe that you neglected to practice this where Emily's review was concerned. You admitted at the beginning of your review that your perception of her experience led you to believe that "by now you should know better". All of her relatively short submissions since September 2022 do not make her as proficient as your review portrayed her to be. Your presentation was prejudicial as a result.

 

[AlinaX]

New and new-ish authors crave reviews. The stories we write mean so much to us and while it's fantastic to have views and favourites and even the occasional short comment, there's a hunger to have someone really read and appreciate them. Even a middling review can be nice, but a critical review can hurt bitterly.

I have never asked A&O to review me, in part because I know my stories are mostly daft, and in part because I have no desire to have faults in my writing pointed out, so why waste everyone's time? But I think some people see that thread as a challenge, a source of potential validation rather than a resource for self-improvement.

 

[djrip]

From EmilyMiller’s reaction to the review it seems to me that she lacks this distinction. She doesn’t differentiate between herself and her stories, and our persons and our review, and that’s why she feels like we’re attacking her personally. If this is the case, I understand where she’s coming from, but her lashing out at us with accusations and insults is still unacceptable behavior.

If one is to believe Emily, you did attack her personally in PM, and that was the issue, not the review. So if you're going to bring her up and analyze her reaction, maybe address the actual topic that she said caused her reaction--your accusation that anyone who has said her writing was good was just objectifying her.