Monogamous Characters making the jump into non-monogamy (or not...)

[Lifestyle66]

Well yeah, but we still learn from the mistakes we see in our past and do not repeat them if we feel we should not. I grew up raised by a strict family that spanked me if I broke rules. My sister did too. We both couldn’t stand it. We considered ourselves good people and you didn’t need to prove that by physically harming us when we weren’t. She’s raising three kids right now without such physical punishment as part of the equation. I like to think it’s capable of working out right for both kids and parents. Last I saw they’re doing fine but the kids aren’t old enough for grade school yet. I’m not going to predict a bad future by saying some crap like she’s spoiling her kids. She’s not far as I know. Neither is their sex positive uncle who puts his fandom of porn on hold whenever he’s around the kids. They have two of those by the way- the other one is gay. And we’re both capable of being a great dad ourselves if we step into those circumstances. I just hope we measure up should we get the chance.

All true.

We remember our past and learn lessons, which we try to apply to our future decisions.

My grandfather was VERY strict raising his own kids. My father was a quiet man and never beat us for his pleasure or even out of anger. But when his stress reached a breaking point, ...

I've learned by watching others (and myself) that when stress increases, our baser instincts take over. We can all be enlightened, civilized parents, spouses, friends, and neighbors. But when stress and frustration reach a breaking point, you can hear it in the voices of those peace-loving, kind, and gentle people, as they gather in groups and pick up rocks.

My ex-wife was a liberal feminist, insisting that we NEVER spank our kids, and that we would NEVER have guns in the house, and they couldn't even have toy guns. And they would only eat healthy meals, and not be given candy or other junk food.

All of that eventually went out the window, first when I caught her spanking our three-year-old for not picking up his toys. Then I found our young boys using sticks as guns when playing with their neighbor friends. And another time I saw my oldest son sitting with a neighbor boy who had some candy. The other boy accidently dropped a piece of candy on the sidewalk and I heard him tell my son "You can have that."

I learned to recognize hypocrisy, and I changed our child-rearing ways. They soon had water guns, nerf guns, and bicycle rides to the local store to buy treats of their choice. And they received a measured amount of discipline to ensure they learned there are other authorities and consequences for bad behavior.

My ex-wife, for all of her learned passivist good intentions deluded herself insisting she was a better parent with her progressive ideals. But she just couldn't do it 24/7, and the kids saw it. My daughter says, "You two should have divorced ten years earlier, we would have had a better childhood." (BTW: All of our kids turned out without going to jail, none are on drugs, all employed, and each owns their own home.)

This is where I picked up that observation by my main character saying about their dysfunctional parents: "Our parents grew up with their own demons and were the best parents they could be."

 

[MrPixel]

I’m dealing with this mono-to-poly issue in one story series. A polyamorous/swinger FC married a traditional mono MC, he fully knowing she was active in the lifestyle - she even invited one of her closest swinger couples along on their honeymoon, although the friends had the common sense to politely decline.

In this case she brought him into sharing her approach to intimate life by keying into the fetish that attracted him to her - her mind: she was a PhD teaching at a major university. Her solution was to make him aware that her swinger group had many Fs with advanced degrees, which broke his resolve to keep monogamous. They’re still working on him up to the point of referring him to a sex-positive counselor, although in a minor twist his primary external interest has become one of the non-college-graduate women in their group.

 

[TheRedChamber]

Published the story that inspired this thread a few days ago.

Bottom line, they stayed monogamous and I punted this question away for the next story (The possibly upcoming one about tennis doubles is going to need answers though). They did have a long conversation about things at the end, but that too ended up on the cutting room floor after discussion with my beta reader.

 

[Lifestyle66]

I just clicked "Publish" on my next story ("Abuse Addict", "Emotional abuse can be addictive … and rewarding.")

This one is 7K words in Loving Wives, with an emotionally abused husband somewhat suspicious of his wife in a sexless marriage, and finally deciding to cheat on his wife. I'm testing the waters in LW to see how they'll react to this one. I build the husband as a retired Army Spec Ops sniper, then have him pontificate on why he doesn't go ballistic on his wife. There's no BTB. Then after divorce, he hooks up with a divorcee (lifestyle "slut") as the extreme opposite of his first wife.

 

[AchtungNight]

I just clicked "Publish" on my next story ("Abuse Addict", "Emotional abuse can be addictive … and rewarding.")

This one is 7K words in Loving Wives, with an emotionally abused husband somewhat suspicious of his wife in a sexless marriage, and finally deciding to cheat on his wife. I'm testing the waters in LW to see how they'll react to this one. I build the husband as a retired Army Spec Ops sniper, then have him pontificate on why he doesn't go ballistic on his wife. There's no BTB. Then after divorce, he hooks up with a divorcee (lifestyle "slut") as the extreme opposite of his first wife.

Sounds like a man I’d enjoy getting to know. A woman too. The second woman, obviously.

 

[Djmac1031]

So what I'm interested in this thread is if anyone has developed characters who were initially intended to be monogamous in early chapters/stories but then one day just broke the rules

Don't know if this will count ultimately, but:

I started The Jenna Arrangement series with just two characters; Tom and Jenna.

I built their relationship slowly over several chapters. The theme of the series was a lot of Exhibition/ Voyeur/ CFNM stuff, so they didn't actually have sex for awhile. It was a long, slow tease and build up.

As it progressed, I introduce Jenna's best friend Trish.

SPOILERS: initially she was there just to help continue the E/V themes but as it progressed Trish did become...more directly involved.

But other than that, Tom & Jenna are monogamous. Jenna likes to tease and flash and even started her own Only Fans page, but has no interest having sex with other men at all.

She's shared Tom with Trish, but after that none of them are looking to bring still more into the action nor going out and finding/ fucking strangers.