Labels: Straight, Bi, Gay, or Lesbian

lc69hunter

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I am in my 70's, and started playing in my teens. My first FMF was at age 16, and my first MFM was shortly after turning 18, so I have decades of history.

My supposition is as follows: The above labels which are tossed about loosely should apply to one's relationship preference, and not necessarily one's sexual activity. Is there a high correlation? Yes. Is it anywhere near 100%? No where near.

Next supposition: Sex, at the end of the day, is nothing more than body parts, bodily fluids, and pleasure, which covers a broad spectrum of activities.

After those many decades of participating in, observing, discussing with individuals, couple and small groups of every sexual persuasion in threesomes, foursomes, and moresomes and all variations thereof, including cuckolding, sharing, swapping, swinging and orgies (my wife and I actually chaperoned a gangbang once to make sure nothing got out of hand, but that's another story), here are my thoughts:

Whatever happens, and whomever does whom, in a multiple (three or more) situation, does not deserve labels, and can do harm to someone's opinion of themselves. The cuck who cleans up her lover's creampie, or even cleans her lover's cock at her request, is not gay or bi, it is just part of the relationship dynamic between the three. Swapping: my wife and I were swapping with this couple on a regular basis on weekends. One Friday night after the meal, the women sat down on the couch with grins, and told us we were cut off until they saw some guy/guy action. Well, neither of us were there to sit around and watch TV all weekend, so we gave them what they asked for. Did it make us gay or bi? No, it was just part of the dynamic. Group situations: Women tend to be freer in these situations than their husbands/boyfriends, as we guys get inundated with that macho/anti-gay bullshit growing up, so quite often it was the wife encouraging the husband to let go. Labeling him as gay or bi would actually be detrimental to his ego and his growth. I fucked several husbands over the years, received a number of blowjobs, and have given a few. It turned none of us gay or bi.

One of the conversations that really highlighted the difference between relationship preference and sexual activity was one with my wife at the time. She loved the scent, the taste, the touch, and the kisses of a woman, and in a group situation would be one of the first women down between the thighs of another woman. Her orgasms and her eagerness worried me a bit, so one day I asked her if I should be worried at her falling in love and leaving me for a woman. She looked at me and without hesitation replied, "You know I love women sexually, but if I were to set up house with a another female, in six months I would be in jail for domestic violence or murder. Does that answer your question?" It did.

What are your thoughts and/or experiences?
 
Totally agree with your thought regarding stupid labels. I've had some great side times with other males. Not many but enough to know it felt great & I got hard & turned on by it all. I NEVER once questioned my sexuality I have always been straight. I don't look at dudes thinking them attractive or their cocks or even look their way. I look at women though all the time my entire life. I'm only "attracted" to females. Sexually I don't want a cock in my mouth or think about much of anything m2m related unless watching some m/m porn. I NEVER wanted to kiss a guy or be passionate with a guy, cuddle, nipple play and any of that it just doesn't turn me on. But get me naked with another guy, I always like the look of a penis like mine, we touch each other's cocks it's hot and I'm willing to have fun just for the pleasure & to "get off". And that is it. It never turned me gay or even bi I've always been straight and I know this. I don't need anyone else putting any label on me IDGAF about their thoughts I know what is in both my heads. And the dumber one gets hard & pleasured it doesn't matter if it's a woman or a guy. And just like yourself, when I was a young guy before I even knew about sex it didn't matter what touched my dick it still got hard and it didn't mean I was gay or bi back then.
And my brain has always found only women attractive period. The penis responds to stimulation regardless. I'd much rather have intercourse with a woman than a guy. I wasn't found of it the very few times I did fuck a guy. Yeah I was excited & hard but it just wasn't like with a woman who I felt the need & desire to be passionate with. With a dude it was just about getting off. Even if that sounds selfish. Much prefer a woman for sex. But now that I'm older & don't get it with women, I figure I might have to be open to other dudes to have sex ever again as I DO NOT want to court, date or bother with the drama & money that comes with dating women anymore. It's too much emotions for women and I don't want to bother with that anymore at my older age. And I'm not into hookers or even anonymous hook ups with guys either I always found that desperate bullshit & sex ain't worth all that. IF I had a woman a hooker isn't for me. I wouldn't want to be doing a chick that I wouldn't know if she really wanted me or not or if it was just for the money. F that. Might as well just find a dude that I know if he's going to give me a BJ he's doing it because he WANTS to & likes it.
 
I'm in the same age group as the OP and have a similar sexual history.

I don't disagree with anything he outlines in his post but my attitude is a little different. I like labels, they do matter, at least to me. I regard myself as bisexual, I present myself as bisexual in these various online communities, I have no problem with that. It also helps me put the world in order in my head when I'm interacting with others.
 
The thing that pisses me off the most about this subject is that, from my perspective at least, those who dislike labels want to ban them. Their attitude seems to be I don't like this practice so nobody should practice it. If you don't like ;labels, fine, don't use them. If you like labels, use them to your hearts content. Then, both sides, mind your own fucking business.
 
Ag
The thing that pisses me off the most about this subject is that, from my perspective at least, those who dislike labels want to ban them. Their attitude seems to be I don't like this practice so nobody should practice it. If you don't like ;labels, fine, don't use them. If you like labels, use them to your hearts content. Then, both sides, mind your own fucking business.
Agreed. Love and let live.
 
I was in a MFM threesome in my early 20s (early 70s) that involved a male friend and me with a woman from a bar. My friend became upset because the woman wouldn't fondle and stroke his cock while he sucked and played with her nipples. He had become verbal about it and was ruining the fun. I had my face buried in the woman's pussy, which she had clearly been enjoying. Out of the side of one eye, I saw my friend laying beside me, facing toward me, with his erection. While I continued attending to the lady, I reached a hand to his cock and started stroking it. It did calm him down.

I consider myself straight. Was I bisexual? LOL

The only other instance I was going to be agreeable to involved a husband part of the couple on-line which began as a couple seeking a male for a threesome. This was about 10 years ago. He claimed initially it was all for his wife, "the nymph", as he referred to her. He asked if I had any cock pics I could send to show her because she was still picky on WHAT she fucked. So, I took some cock pics of myself and sent them to him. He quickly replied "I sure would like to suck that cock". I then asked him if he was BI. He showed as straight on their profile. He replied that many a time, his wife also loved to see him suck another man's cock. I told him initially that if his wife was going to accept a threesome with me and it was going to be her desire for him to suck my cock, I would let him. He was happy and would get back to me about setting a meeting date.

But then I got to thinking that the guy was lying because of how he reacted to my pics. He said "I sure would like to....".
I messaged him back to forget it. I told him I didn't believe his wife probably even knew about his exploiting other men for cock pics and believed his wife wasn't even involved in any outside sex play.

I consider myself straight. Was I bisexual for accepting initially to allow my cock to be sucked?
I would NOT have reciprocated had that ever happened.

I've been told because of the latter I probably had "gay tendencies".

Any comments to any of my post?
 
I was in a MFM threesome in my early 20s (early 70s) that involved a male friend and me with a woman from a bar. My friend became upset because the woman wouldn't fondle and stroke his cock while he sucked and played with her nipples. He had become verbal about it and was ruining the fun. I had my face buried in the woman's pussy, which she had clearly been enjoying. Out of the side of one eye, I saw my friend laying beside me, facing toward me, with his erection. While I continued attending to the lady, I reached a hand to his cock and started stroking it. It did calm him down.

I consider myself straight. Was I bisexual? LOL

The only other instance I was going to be agreeable to involved a husband part of the couple on-line which began as a couple seeking a male for a threesome. This was about 10 years ago. He claimed initially it was all for his wife, "the nymph", as he referred to her. He asked if I had any cock pics I could send to show her because she was still picky on WHAT she fucked. So, I took some cock pics of myself and sent them to him. He quickly replied "I sure would like to suck that cock". I then asked him if he was BI. He showed as straight on their profile. He replied that many a time, his wife also loved to see him suck another man's cock. I told him initially that if his wife was going to accept a threesome with me and it was going to be her desire for him to suck my cock, I would let him. He was happy and would get back to me about setting a meeting date.

But then I got to thinking that the guy was lying because of how he reacted to my pics. He said "I sure would like to....".
I messaged him back to forget it. I told him I didn't believe his wife probably even knew about his exploiting other men for cock pics and believed his wife wasn't even involved in any outside sex play.

I consider myself straight. Was I bisexual for accepting initially to allow my cock to be sucked?
I would NOT have reciprocated had that ever happened.

I've been told because of the latter I probably had "gay tendencies".

Any comments to any of my post?
I think maybe you were or are too hung up on "does this make me gay or bi?" thing. Who cares so long as you like it and it doesn't effect you in a bad way. It's nobody's business. I'm straight but have had some M2m experiences & enjoyed them for what they were. Didn't pound my head with asking myself if I was gay or bi or not. I know in my heat that I'm straight. The penis usually reacts to any kind of arousal usually in most cases. I never once thought that makes a person gay or bi. Reaching out to your friend with a helping hand in that situation was very cool of you. I'm surprised that didn't lead to you both getting together later on. And even if you had, it wouldn't make either of you gay or bi imho. In the situation with the guy & his wife, you have to just call it the way your gut is telling you. And if you truly are not into doing anything sexually with other guys then so be it. Just because something might be in your head (or if you even want to maybe experience more with other guys), that doesn't mean you are gay or bi either. Too much thinking into things ruins it. But if that guy you felt wasn't being honest then probably best that you said no.
 
I think maybe you were or are too hung up on "does this make me gay or bi?" thing. Who cares so long as you like it and it doesn't effect you in a bad way. It's nobody's business. I'm straight but have had some M2m experiences & enjoyed them for what they were. Didn't pound my head with asking myself if I was gay or bi or not. I know in my heat that I'm straight. The penis usually reacts to any kind of arousal usually in most cases. I never once thought that makes a person gay or bi. Reaching out to your friend with a helping hand in that situation was very cool of you. I'm surprised that didn't lead to you both getting together later on. And even if you had, it wouldn't make either of you gay or bi imho. In the situation with the guy & his wife, you have to just call it the way your gut is telling you. And if you truly are not into doing anything sexually with other guys then so be it. Just because something might be in your head (or if you even want to maybe experience more with other guys), that doesn't mean you are gay or bi either. Too much thinking into things ruins it. But if that guy you felt wasn't being honest then probably best that you said no.
Thanks for the comments. But I think you are trying to psychoanalyze me rather than comprehend the context of my story. You totally misinterpreted my post. I don't go for anyone subjectively judging another's sexuality and then believing what they think is right.

The problem I had, is that when I write and expose things in interest of adding to a conversation about what I have done in the past---on this site----, will anyone here assume I am bi because of what I did without any consideration of the circumstances? My questions of whether I was bi or not were facetious.

I don't need bi males suddenly start messaging me wanting to know, or offering to, engage in gay contact. I'm here to be liter-erotic with females, period. If what I write turns a guys crank, that's fine. But I think I made it clear enough that in my opinion it is wrong for someone else to label another's sexuality. That is only the right of the individual themself.
 
Thanks for the comments. But I think you are trying to psychoanalyze me rather than comprehend the context of my story. You totally misinterpreted my post. I don't go for anyone subjectively judging another's sexuality and then believing what they think is right.

The problem I had, is that when I write and expose things in interest of adding to a conversation about what I have done in the past---on this site----, will anyone here assume I am bi because of what I did without any consideration of the circumstances? My questions of whether I was bi or not were facetious.

I don't need bi males suddenly start messaging me wanting to know, or offering to, engage in gay contact. I'm here to be liter-erotic with females, period. If what I write turns a guys crank, that's fine. But I think I made it clear enough that in my opinion it is wrong for someone else to label another's sexuality. That is only the right of the individual themself.
I wasn't at all trying to psychoanalyze really. I was just going by what you wrote it seemed to me that you possibly questioned certain thoughts & actions is all. You asked if you was bisexual for accepting initially to allow your cock to be sucked? So I'm not sure what I misinterpreted in your post. No worries though it doesn't matter. Have good day.
 
The labels. The little boxes.

I had always thought of myself as straight until I encountered my first transgender woman on a cam site. I never imagined that she was trans until she showed me her cock and I surprised her by telling her I wanted it.

After this I spent a decade worrying about whether this meant I was gay. As a result I delayed acting on my desires for a very long time.

So now I am the bottom for my lovely trans girlfriend. Am I gay? Am I straight? Am I bi? I am happy.
 
Very good topic.

When I was a senior in high school, there was gossip in school that two stronger bully boys had forced a nerdy, weaker boy to crawl across the floor and kiss the tops of their shoes.

I remember thinking it was so hot and wishing those bullies did that to me.

But I knew I wasn’t gay. The fantasy for me transcended labels of sexual orientation, it was simply being aroused by humiliation.
 
I guess if you feel the need to wear a label, wear it.
Just don't shove it in my face cos I really don't care what you see yourself as.
Just be a decent human being.
 
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