Ideas for telling your partner you like to dress...

[OpenMouth]

Hi

I didn't want to hijack threads about being in the closet because I really want my wife to know, and I am eventually going to talk to her about it. A lot of what we talk about will hopefully also be useful for guys who don't dress but have or want to have physical contact with other men, but it's mainly for those of us who enjoy feminine underwear, clothing etc.

My opportunity to talk on such matters will have to come once my wife is relaxed enough for us to have sex again. It's probably been a year but I know things will improve and eventually I'll be able to bring up the subject. I will remind me of the time 15 years ago when she used to put her knickers on me, and actually bought me a pair to wear when we went out. We had great sex in those days, but it did eventually taper off.

The poor woman has been so stressed that she has probably pushed everything to the back of her mind. I'm sure if she thought about it she will know it's not gone away. She knows I shave my body and a few months ago she spotted my long and manicured nails: "they look like woman's hands!" It made me dizzy to hear her say that.

I'm thinking I'll remind her about the black lace knickers she bought for me, and that the enjoyment stayed with me for a long time. I'll tell her I have bought myself a few pairs and I like to wear them to masturbate. Then I will tell her I occasionally wear them during the day, under my male clothes.

I suspect she will ask why I'm telling her all this; my honest answer is that I'm worried she will find out, because I want to do it more regularly.

She'll ask why... the standard answer is that I like the way they feel, but I know that won't be enough. It's a start, but I need her to know that I like to wear pink knickers, that I find the idea of feminisation erotic and exciting.

She knows I have an interest in dildos and cocks, especially black ones, so it might even be possible to explain that when I masturbate in my pink knickers I'm often watching videos of cocks. I only worry that she might ask me if I've acted on my stated desire (again, some years ago) to be fucked. In the ideal world she would understand that acting on my desires has been a vital safety valve since our physical relationship ran down; but there's also the very real possibility she will see it as a betrayal.

 

[OpenMouth]

Does nobody else intend to ever come out to a partner? Maybe it's just me. I know it's scary.

 

[ChrissyCD64]

Hi

I didn't want to hijack threads about being in the closet because I really want my wife to know, and I am eventually going to talk to her about it. A lot of what we talk about will hopefully also be useful for guys who don't dress but have or want to have physical contact with other men, but it's mainly for those of us who enjoy feminine underwear, clothing etc.

My opportunity to talk on such matters will have to come once my wife is relaxed enough for us to have sex again. It's probably been a year but I know things will improve and eventually I'll be able to bring up the subject. I will remind me of the time 15 years ago when she used to put her knickers on me, and actually bought me a pair to wear when we went out. We had great sex in those days, but it did eventually taper off.

The poor woman has been so stressed that she has probably pushed everything to the back of her mind. I'm sure if she thought about it she will know it's not gone away. She knows I shave my body and a few months ago she spotted my long and manicured nails: "they look like woman's hands!" It made me dizzy to hear her say that.

I'm thinking I'll remind her about the black lace knickers she bought for me, and that the enjoyment stayed with me for a long time. I'll tell her I have bought myself a few pairs and I like to wear them to masturbate. Then I will tell her I occasionally wear them during the day, under my male clothes.

I suspect she will ask why I'm telling her all this; my honest answer is that I'm worried she will find out, because I want to do it more regularly.

She'll ask why... the standard answer is that I like the way they feel, but I know that won't be enough. It's a start, but I need her to know that I like to wear pink knickers, that I find the idea of feminisation erotic and exciting.

She knows I have an interest in dildos and cocks, especially black ones, so it might even be possible to explain that when I masturbate in my pink knickers I'm often watching videos of cocks. I only worry that she might ask me if I've acted on my stated desire (again, some years ago) to be fucked. In the ideal world she would understand that acting on my desires has been a vital safety valve since our physical relationship ran down; but there's also the very real possibility she will see it as a betrayal.

I wish I could help, but my wife knew that I was a CD and a bisexual when we met. That is what drew us to each other, she is also bisexual and loves to dress up sexy as much as I do.

 

[OpenMouth]

I wish I could help, but my wife knew that I was a CD and a bisexual when we met. That is what drew us to each other, she is also bisexual and loves to dress up sexy as much as I do.

You are so lucky!

 

[yukonnights]

Hi



… The poor woman has been so stressed that she has probably pushed everything to the back of her mind. I'm sure if she thought about it she will know it's not gone away. She knows I shave my body and a few months ago she spotted my long and manicured nails: "they look like woman's hands!" It made me dizzy to hear her say that.

I'm thinking I'll remind her about the black lace knickers she bought for me, and that the enjoyment stayed with me for a long time. I'll tell her I have bought myself a few pairs and I like to wear them to masturbate. Then I will tell her I occasionally wear them during the day, under my male clothes.

I suspect she will ask why I'm telling her all this; my honest answer is that I'm worried she will find out, because I want to do it more regularly.

She'll ask why... the standard answer is that I like the way they feel, but I know that won't be enough. It's a start, but I need her to know that I like to wear pink knickers, that I find the idea of feminisation erotic and exciting.

She knows I have an interest in dildos and cocks, especially black ones, so it might even be possible to explain that when I masturbate in my pink knickers I'm often watching videos of cocks. I only worry that she might ask me if I've acted on my stated desire (again, some years ago) to be fucked. In the ideal world she would understand that acting on my desires has been a vital safety valve since our physical relationship ran down; but there's also the very real possibility she will see it as a betrayal.

just a thought; In the parts I highlighted above, take note of the fact that your explanations to her are all about you. It came to my mind that you might have better results if you said something like; 'I just want to get back to the intimacy we used to share, etc." In other words, make it about her too.

That said, we guys have to remember that many women's libido slows down with age. In some cases intercourse becomes painful. So perhaps she might be more open to things like using a dildo on you, or pegging you, or role playing, etc.

After having this discussion, it may be that she isn't able or interested herself, but at that point she might be more open to you finding a nice safe man to satisfy some of your needs.

Good Luck!