Demon priest

[Brandnewbuddy]

so I had a random thought and decided to just run with it:

The Catholic Church is having so much trouble getting people to sign up for the clergy that they decided to start binding demons into doing it. They set a few rules but as long as the demons keep the church goers coming and the collection plates full, they don’t mind too much with what they get up to, as long as they can be discreet.

So the story follows a demon who gets bound into being a priest in a small town and his creative solutions to the town’s problems and his duties as a priest.

I figure he looks perfectly human and the moment he’s bound he creates an identity that seems like it always existed, with only the bishop he’s under knowing he’s a demon.

I figure it would be a mix of erotic and non erotic stories where he just deals with things in unique ways.

For example: non-erotic

He gets invited over to a parishioner’s home and gets ambushed by them wanting to see if he’ll do an exorcism on their daughter. He of course explains that’s not how it works, they should talk to a psychiatrist and therapist first etc…and then daughter walks in and she’s possessed by someone the priest knows so he does an exorcim which is mostly telling the dude to back off.

“Goddamnit Ralph! I thought you kicked the habit.”

“C’mon dude it’s boring as fuck down there.”

“Yeah, cause it’s hell! Now go back there!”

Erotic:

1. Priest listens to confessions and gets tired of hearing about “impure thoughts” so he starts using his abilities to arrange for hookups to occur so he can at least start hearing about some real debauched behavior.

2. Priest also has to provide communion to the local convent. He of course sows a little discord, encourages some of the sisters to get a little friendly with each other but he meets the mother superior and becomes hopelessly attracted as to a demon, purity and faith are a lot more important than age or looks so he’ll do anything to get in her habit.

3. Politician comes to town and starts shaking hands, kissing babies, what have you and then comes to the church to get an endorsement and a photo-op. The priest turns him down as it’s illegal for a church to endorse a candidate…which he gets rebuked for by the dioceses since while it is illegal all the churches do it. The politician of course tries to make things rough on the priest and his congregation and the priest retaliates as only he can: politician’s long lost sex tapes Re-emerge out of the ether, his wife is caught sucking off his campaign team, his daughter runs away to Canada with her new wife, his son punches a Neo-Nazi in the face (with the priest explains that the last two he actually had almost nothing to do with: daughter was gay and Nazis are very punchable, he just gave each of the kids a little push) and his wife leaves him after a new video surfaces of him being fucked by guy (with his publicist even saying “you know we might have been able to salvage this if the guy was white but it’s hard to tell people you’ll be tough on China when you’re getting a hard on from being fucked by a guy from China!”)

By the end the politician is ruined (with him maybe going to the confessional and the priest revealing everything he did and even scarring him for life by showing his true form) and the priest then sets his sights on the pastors and preachers in town who did go along with endorsing the politician.

 

[Rob_Royale]

Regardless of how he got there a demon posing as clergy is a great idea. He uses a type of hypnosis that incorporates the demonic language while he is taking confession or assisting couples, to entice them into debaucherous behavior until the entire congregation are fucking wildly in the fellowship hall.

 

[AchtungNight]

For bonus points he has an Angel as a monitor and possibly a friend.

 

[Rob_Royale]

For bonus points he has an Angel as a monitor and possibly a friend.

It's kinda been done recently though.

 

[AchtungNight]

True.

 

[Lube_it_up]

Instead of fighting the sinful thoughts and impulses of the parishioners, the priest encourages them. And possibly using some demonic stuff in the process. I remembered the manga Demonic Detective Neuro Nougami. As a mage, Neuro summoned various demonic tools that helped him in his investigations. I imagined something similar.

1.The mother complains about a naughty child (of course, an adult)(boy or girl, or both). The priest tells her that the problem must be dealt with harshly and hands her a "sanctified" wooden spanking paddle. The mother doubts, but after another trick of her child, in a fit of anger, she uses the tool. And it works, but there are side effects. -The makes the victim more obedient for only a few days. -After the effect disappears, the person becomes even more naughty than before. -Each hit of the paddle causes a surge of excitement in the one holding it.

2. The wife complains that her husband demands a blowjob from her. But she doesn't want to do it because it's sinful. The priest puts her to rest and sends her home. The next morning she discovers that her pussy, anus and nipples have been replaced with mouths. (From now on, food waste just disappears magically, no need to ask too many questions.) Terrified, she resorts to the priest, but he again reassures her. "The ways of the Lord are inscrutable", "Perhaps he is hinting at something. Returning home, she decides to suck her husband in the hope that her terrible metamorphosis will pass. She starts out very reluctant (and inept because this is her first blowjob) but in the process discovers that she really enjoys sucking cock. After the end, she is excited and apprehensively shows her husband her new look. It immediately turns to rock. They do a lot of hot and kinky sex. But a new problem is revealed, since the wife's clitoris and vagina have disappeared, she cannot cum no matter how much she is excited. She again comes to the priest and he calms her down and sends her home. Now each of her palatine uvula also performs to become a clitoris.

3. The parents are worried about their son masturbating too much and ask the priest for help. Parents worry about their son masturbating too much. They ask the priest for help and he promises to talk to the son. In a conversation, he learns that the guy masturbates to chaste porn. Instead of scolding and shaming the boy, the priest offers him a small box. Arriving home, the boy opens the box and sees a cage with a fancy design (Looks like some kind of demonic octopus). When he inserts the key and locks the lock, having tried on the cage, he melts and glues the lock. And the cell begins to move and tease. Further development may go in different ways, but I have no special ideas.

4. Another story of chastity. A young couple is getting ready for the wedding and want to abstain from sex until the wedding. But they worry that they will not have enough willpower and ask the priest for advice. He offers them two chastity belts that look old and worn. He offers them two chastity belts that look old and worn but fit quite comfortably. Now the bride and groom are waiting for their wedding day with a vengeance. On each belt there is some kind of inscription that cannot be read due to wear and tear and a dial with two zeros that does not move. Behind the wedding chores, they do not attach importance to the fact that the belts become more fresh and shiny every day. Also, the belts tease them, but they write it off as excitement. When their wedding night arrives, they return home and find a box, too big for the keys, from the priest. In the box, they find a bottle of lube and a lot of dildos. They call the priest to find out what it means and where are the keys? They get the answer: "Keys? Oh, I forgot to say, these are special belts they will open when the brush reaches a hundred." They inspect the belts again, now the inscriptions can be read, on both belts it is written: "Number of anal orgasms 00"

 

[Lube_it_up]

5. A middle-aged woman spoke disapprovingly of girls dressing too frankly. The priest heard this and now she is allergic to clothes. The skin covered with clothes begins to itch. The more clothes, the more itching. At first it is tolerable but progresses over time. Also, the itching is aggravated by excitement. I would like this change not to be instantaneous and to happen gradually. First, she stops wearing underwear. Then lighter dresses and blouses. At a certain moment, she discovers that in order to make the clothes itch less, she can be without clothes as much as possible. She begins to walk around the house naked, which is noticed by several neighbors. Once, while at a public event, she gets excited at the thought that someone might notice that she is without underwear. This makes the itching worse. She runs to a secluded place and takes off her clothes. The excitement does not subside and now she is forced to return home naked. She tries to sneak in unnoticed but is discovered by a couple of guys. She is forced to serve them so that they do not reveal her.

6. Parents are asking for help with a daughter who listens to heavy metal calls herself the bride of Satan and stuff like that. The priest gave her a geng beng with some demons.

7. The boys find a box of fleshlight. The box says "A replica of [name of their school principal]'s vagina" and even has a picture of their school principal. Fleshlight is a portal to the principal's pussy from the school. After some time, they find the same copy of the anus of their school principal. After some time, they find a torso (from neck to mid-thigh) with the same copy of the anus of their school principal. In addition to the portal, this torso also transmits touches, slaps, etc. Of course, this was arranged by the priest after the headmaster asked for advice on how to deal with negligent students.

 

[madelinemasoch]

1. Priest listens to confessions and gets tired of hearing about “impure thoughts” so he starts using his abilities to arrange for hookups to occur so he can at least start hearing about some real debauched behavior.

This is really funny.

 

[Carnevil9]

I think you could write a long series of stories just focusing on the Demon Priest functioning as an exorcist.

Each demon he encounters is one that he knows, and each one drives a hard bargain as to what it will take for him to dispossess the victim. The Priest and the possessing demon negotiate, in front of the parents and other priests, but in their own demonic language (Enochian? Or is that just for angels?) In the end, they always come to an agreement, and then the Demon Priest has to find a way to make it happen.

Examples:

• The DM has to get the ranking nun of the local convent to appear nude in public.
• The DM has to deliver a condemned criminal just before his execution so the possessing demon can have a new home.
• The DM has to swap the blessed flowers at the entrance to the cemetery with unblessed ones so the demons can get inside.
• (I'm kind of envisioning it as light-hearted but erotic entertainment)

 

[LupusDei]

I think the exorcism scenario can get very steamy hot in various ways. For one, what if, the possessor is a female demon he's got some history with? The girl's body as a toy between them two...

Or, the girl, she has summoned the possessor herself, because she's fantasizing about demons and attracted to everything such, and during the successful exorcism she got caught the priest being actually a demon, so now she's on a mission to seduce him instead.

 

[SoCalAshley]

Here is a different kind of priest story. I decided to take a humorous approach to going to confession. Enjoy.

Coming to Know God - Humor & Satire - Literotica.com