Deep Tissue, Happy Endings 3, Ian

[such_a_bad_man]

I lay there, feeling a wave of acceptance wash through me as I kept my hand on the small of Sidney's back. I'd lost all track of the work she was doing on my arms and my mind focused on the sensations of my fingers on her skin, feeling another person's skin for the first time in more time than I care to admit.

As she started shaking out my arms, I listened as she spoke about how our time together might be scheduled based on her experience with other clients. I frowned a little at the idea of having longer and longer breaks between visits. I was just starting to relax and give over to the treatment and the prospect of getting it less and less was not desirable, but then again, that might change as we get further along.

"I'd like to stick to weekly visits for now, if you have openings that will work with my schedule. I... I think it's too early to say if we're a good fit; I'd like to reserve that judgement for when we've had a few more sessions." I looked up into her eyes. Something in her gaze held me transfixed. My will to hold to my principles regarding this visit wavered ever so slightly as I looked deeper into her eyes. My brain knew that it was too early to commit, but my heart wanted to give myself over to the process freely.

Swallowing hard, I tried to articulate what I was feeling when Sidney moved up onto the table, straddling me! I swallowed hard as I looked up at her, her mesh top over her bra and what I thought was a skirt turned out to be shorts styled like one. I didn't resist as she moved my hands around to her back, but mostly because I couldn't believe what was happening. I swallowed hard again as she placed them there and I was to feel her breathe.

"I... Did... Did you have to get on me for me to feel this?" I ask, knowing that my body will react to a beautiful woman on top of me any second. I close my eyes for a second and breathe deep. 'She's a professional. Just do as she asks; she's doing this for a reason,' I thought to myself before opening them again and concentrating on the feel of her back expanding and contracting as she began to breathe deep. "Wow... You want me to take breaks and just... breathe?" I ask, hearing her breaths and feeling the force she applied to my hands. "Like this?"

I swallow hard and realize that talking about breathing was not helping. I could already feel the blood starting to collect in my groin as Sidney's ass hovered above me and her thighs rested around me.

 

[Sidney_1]

“Yes, involving as many of your senses as possible helps you to learn, Mr. Harris. We’re using your sense of hearing, seeing, and touch, and now you have your own visceral experience of what I want you to do to help yourself. I work intuitively and that’s what I was drawn to do. I know you see us as two physical people, but when you enter my office, I am also guided by a wise knowing. And that wise knowing in me connects with the wise knowing in you on this table and helps me to tune into you on the level that would be best for you, in the best timing.”

I shift my hands to the front and sides of Ian’s ribs as he breathes deeply.

“Yes, that’s better. It will be even easier once we open up your chest and I work on your back. Yes, I suggest you take a few minutes to stretch and breathe deeply regularly. Since you don’t have any other form of vigorous exercise, this will be very important for you.”

I debate whether to tell Ian to lower his hands to my waist, but I decide to see what he does without guidance. I lean forward to open the armrests to a slight angle from my table. Most of my clients loved the soft handcuffs and overhead positioning when I worked on their torso and abdomen, but I sense this would be too threatening for Mr. Harris. I liked to use that method for invigorating massage. But, Mr. Harris needed more calming methods.

“Breathing this way will help both energize your body and calm your nerves, as I’ve said. Okay, I’d like to isolate your chest, so I’m going to place your arms away from your torso slightly.”

Just trust, Mr. Harris. If you continue to be resistant, this will not be fun for me and I will not be able to continue therapy with you, I thought silently.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

I wasn't so sure that I believed Sidney as she spoke about a "wise knowing" that we both had. Did she mean animal instinct? I couldn't think too deeply on it as I felt her whole torso expanding and contracting with every breath. It wasn't until I felt her hands on my chest that I realized that I was breathing along with her, matching it with my own breathing. Quite naturally, when her hands touched my chest, my hands on her back moved to her chest. They stayed under her top, but I was so dangerously close to touching her breasts. I bit my lip as I looked up at them. Even with the bra, they looked so full and firm. I tried not to think about how long it had been since I had intimate contact with a woman, but it didn't help as I could feel my loins stirring already. 'No, stop... don't...' I thought to myself as I fought against my natural instincts.

I wasn't sure what she was doing as she slid some thinner rests out to the side of the table, but apparently they were armrests. She intended to work on my chest next, but that wouldn't be good with my body reacting to this position.

"Ummm, I don't wanna sound like I know your job better than you, but could we maybe start on the back first?" I ask, trying to keep my voice from cracking. I try to think about anything else, but the beautiful masseuse straddling me in this darkened room is very hard to ignore.

"I mean, that's the problem area..." I add, trying to justify why I might want to start there first. I hope she buys it before it's too late.

 

[Sidney_1]

“No, I’d like you to stay with whatever is causing you fear and resistance and just welcome it into your body, and let it flow, experience it, and then let it leave if it subsides. When you resist something, it creates tension and fear, and then you don’t get the opportunity to build courage muscles, confidence, and grow as much as you could on many levels.”

I know I’m being firm with Mr. Harris, and I normally would never push a client too far from their emotional safety, but I know I’m never going to get anywhere if we only stay within the safety zone and walls that Mr. Harris has created. He hates to feel, and that’s part of why he’s tense. His back is not even a problem, it’s a symptom.

“In fact, to help quiet your mind and ease your self-consciousness, many of my clients like a blind-fold at certain points in their massage. Would you find that helpful right now? And don’t worry, I’ll only work briefly on the rest of your front half and then we’ll focus on the area where you feel the most physical discomfort. But, we do need to relax the whole of your body, mind, and spirit. If you want results, you have to be open to the process. I want you to love that voice inside of you that is scared, and also love that wise part of you that knows it’s just an old pattern. And I also want you to start befriending that wise part of you that knows that you’re safe with me. That knows that whatever happens here, I will accept you with positive regard and love, and that I truly hope you can leave here feeling better than when you entered. Transformed.”

As I spoke, I decided that Mr. Harris’s arms needed to be wider, and I adjusted the arms and enclosed his arms in the padded restraints. We needed to embrace the discomfort more fully.

I also decided that I would no longer accept referrals from physicians, unless they had been clients, and could educate their patients to trust my non-traditional, intuitive methods. While I didn’t mind dealing with the client’s emotional, mental, and spiritual blocks, I found it exhausting to have to defend my methods and practice.

With referrals, clients walked in with a baseline level of trust, hope, and excitement which helped them to be open and receptive.

His rigidity and resistance was challenging. His body, mind, and spirit were in a constant battle.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

"When you resist something, it creates tension and fear, and then you don’t get the opportunity to build courage muscles, confidence, and grow as much as you could on many levels."

I blinked my eyes as I heard her words. It was so obvious all at once. Even in electrical circuits, all resistance does is dissipate energy as heat. It's not useful and something that needs mitigation. How had I not thought of it before? Also, her personality and connection with the human body since we bagen told me that she would understand probably better than anyone his boy's reaction. She even brought up the fact that he might need sexual release during the session.

'Why are you being such a child about this?' I admonished myself as I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath to calm my heart and just... let it happen.

I could feel the sheets lifting behind her as I lay my arms out to the sides. They slid off her body as I retreated into my own head and fought to clear it. Down, down into an inky blackness went my mind. I focused on the Hubble Deep Space Image I keep on my computer background and thought about the depth of infinity in a hope to quiet my mind. As I did, I felt so disconnected from my body that everything went limp aside from my groin, so swollen from being so close to Sidney and all the work she'd done without realizing it.

As my mind quieted, I felt my consciousness returning to my body. As I did, the soft restraints on my wrists caused a strange reaction. I didn't freak out about being tied down. Something about being secured like this allowed me to give myself over to the process more readily as suddenly it was out of my hands. Secured as I was, I was no longer an active participant. I was clay to be molded by my new sculptor. I felt my heart rate continue to drop, but my breathing was deep and level. I blinked my eyes open and looked up at Sidney who didn't seem to notice the tent in the sheets behind her yet, or if she did, she was playing it very, very cool.

"I... I'm ready for what's next... Don't blind me. I need to experience this fully..." I spoke, my tone softer than usual. I welcomed the table beneath me and didn't struggle against the restraints or her hands. It was all so... energizing.

 

[Sidney_1]

"I... I'm ready for what's next... Don't blind me. I need to experience this fully..."

“Now that’s what I like to hear,” I said, with a soft smile. I could sense Ian’s receptivity and a little fire in his loins, which was a natural occurrence in most healthy men. Still, with Ian, it was an encouraging sign that he was both relaxed and aroused. Many clients liked to watch me work, too.

Keeping my hands on Ian’s chest, I gracefully dismounted off the table and smoothed the drapes, folding down them down just over his pubis. I tucked the drape underneath each thigh, allowing his penis the space it needed for tenting.

I poured more oil into my hands and then returned to the head of the table and leaned over Mr. Harris so that I cold use long, effleurage strokes to massage his shoulders all the way to his belly in broad sweeping circles.

I moaned sofly, as it did take a bit of flexibility and effort, but the stretch was good.

When I sensed Mr. Harris felt relaxed, I began deep tissue work on his pecs, using my knuckles in a rolling motion. After several minutes, I used my thumbs and hands to massage his intercostals before fimly pressing the muscles over his sternum to open his chest. . . my hands sweeping off his sternum to his flank.

“Wonderful, you’re opening up nicely, Mr. Harris. I think you’ll find that it will be easier to breathe deeply afterwards.”

I removed the restraints and placed his arms back at his sides.

“I’d like to do a little leg and groin work, and then we’ll have you turn over and I’ll focus on your back. How are you doing?”

 

[such_a_bad_man]

Part of me was a little disappointed when she slid off from on top of me. Her words allayed any fears I might have had about her reaction to my growing arousal, but it was very distracting all the same. That didn't mean I didn't like the idea of her straddling me. It was why I was as turned on as I am. As she moved above me, I tried to focus on my breathing as I couldn't move anymore, thanks to the restraints.

It became paramount to keeping my mind clear as she began sweeping her hands from my shoulders down to my belly. Such a move made her full breasts hover close to my head and I swallowed hard as they were so tantalizingly close. It also made my cock stir under the tented sheet as she did it. I could feel my head starting to swim as I swallowed hard, trying to focus on breathing deep as she worked and not on my rising arousal. If it was as vital as Sidney said, I should do as my masseuse directs.

I'm not sure what muscle group she worked on; I confess I was too busy ogling her body like a teen at the time. But when she leaned back from working on my chest, it felt like someone had taken a stone off my chest. I felt my lungs filling fuller than I had ever thought possible. My chest ballooned like it hadn't for a long time. I was taking in air like I used to when I was an athlete in my younger days. It was a little astonishing.

I didn't hear her question as I lay there thinking about never being really aware of my breathing before. With my chest as open as it was, I felt like each breath was what I might call a deep breath before. My hands lay at my side after Sidney released them as I still tried to reason this out with myself. 'Maybe it's more than just a back problem...' I thought as I realized Sidney was looking into my eyes expectantly.

"Oh, sorry... I'm... fine. Just thinking about some things. I feel like I'm breathing much better," I added, still not 100% sure what she had asked me. "I trust you to proceed with whatever you think is best." I smiled warmly at her, feeling much more trusting as our session had continued. Maybe all her talk of the non-physical might be worth something after all.

 

[Sidney_1]

“I’m glad you’re starting to feel more relaxed and opened up within your body, Mr. Harris. You really will be amazed if you experiment with the energy of ‘allow’ versus ‘resist’. You open yourself up to all your body’s innate wisdom to heal itself.”

I laid my palms lightly over the space between Mr. Harris’s groin and hip flexors, sending Reiki energy to his first and second chakras, until my hands were filled with heat. I liked to call them the safety and passion chakras and Mr. Harris’s were small and restricted due to his lifestyle and beliefs.

Once I sensed a change in Mr. Harris’s energy system, to receiving, I pressed lightly with my fingers, massaging the tense muscles along his hips.

Although I could see the stirrings of an erection, I hoped that Mr. Harris wouldn’t be troubled or tense, and simply allow it as a natural healthy reaction to opening up and awakening his energy.

I purposely remained quiet, hoping that Mr. Harris would continue to practice relaxing deeply and being more tuned into his body and it’s more pleasurable states.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

"You really will be amazed if you experiment with the energy of ‘allow’ versus ‘resist’."

Again, Sidney had found the one line to cut me to the quick. If I hadn't known better, I'd swear that she'd talked to all my exes. My last long term relationship was with a woman that started calling me 'the place where dates go to die'. She tried to get me into yoga for the longest time, but it was too esoteric and spiritual for my taste. For some reason, Sidney made that part easier. It turned me off to hear her talk about it during the consultation, but her methods were already garnering results. I lay back and kept my mind on my breathing, feeling the pace and drawing it as deep as I could.

I had to keep my mind there as I felt her hands just beside the huge tent I was making in the sheet. I pushed the thought of where her hands were from my head as I kept the focus on the rise and fall of my chest. 'She's jsut doing her work, nothing more...' I told myself as I kept my breathing deep and steady. Then, I felt a warmth radiating out from her hands.

Even with my eyes closed, my brow furrowed. She wasn't rubbing or doing something to cause friction, but the warmth spread through my hips and groin more and more. It pushed my arousal up even more, making me pulse with need of more stimulation. "Sidney...." slipped from my lips, a sighed request that I hoped she understood. It was completely unconscious and I hadn't realized I said it until the silence closed in around me as she continued to work.

I bit my lip and raised my head. I watched her face, curious if she would react to what was happening. Seeing her body glistening slightly in the low light made her all the more alluring. I wanted to reach out and touch her too, but I couldn't. She was my masseuse.

 

[Sidney_1]

And finally. . . a “Sidney”. . .a soft surrender. I knew it meant “Please, you’re making me hot and horny, and I don’t know if I can handle much more. Please, please, give me a release.” But, this was Mr. Harris’s first visit, and I knew I had to address his unconscious needs carefully.

“It’s okay, Mr. Harris. Feeling aroused while I’m working around your intimate areas is perfectly natural and healthy for you. Just let it flow. You were not forthcoming in discussing your sexuality, but I do believe that sex, intimacy, and a deep, orgasmic release can be very helpful in releasing all sorts of tension. As you feel better on all levels, your libido will spike. Some clients come to me for a combination of therapeutic and erotic massage, and they find it very fulfilling, thrilling, and relaxing. With your permission, after working on your legs, I am open to giving you a full body massage. I think just a few strokes, with warm hands…while I send love to that area, with the professional intent of healing . . .would be good for you. I sense this area of your body has been neglected for quite a while, and this would be just a gentle reminder that it is alive. We will have an in-depth conversation before you leave about how to address all sorts of ways that you can help yourself to heal quickly. I have many resources that do not include hands-on techniques if that makes you uncomfortable.”

As I spoke, I bent Mr. Harris’s knee slightly and used long, sweeping strokes from his calf to his knee, and then from his thigh to his groin. He was finally starting to relax and go with the flow of his body.

I smiled gratefully, as I sensed the energy pulsing from his first chakra down to his legs and feet. Although it was rarely my explicit intent to cause an erection, (with the exception of certain elite clients) it was always a secret thrill when it occurred. I had been told that my sexual energy was healing to others whether I was aware of it or not.

“Wonderful, Mr. Harris, I can feel that you’re releasing a lot of past hurt and sorrow. I don’t want you to feel any shame here; I’m a very accepting person and I want you to embrace all the parts of your being, as do I.”

 

[such_a_bad_man]

My head was swimming. Sidney's hands felt so amazing on my thighs. I could feel my cock pulsing in response as I held back, trying to not lose control and tip over the edge. I blinked my eyes open as I heard her talking about adding erotic massage to their work together. Never in my wildest imaginings did I think our visit would turn in that direction. IN all honesty, my body had never felt more alive than how it did as she worked my legs even more vigorously. Then I felt something strange.

I reached up and rubbed the corner of my eye and felt a tear there. I furrowed my brow, trying to process what that meant. She mentioned that I was getting rid of a lot of hidden pain and sorrow, but I hadn't felt that. I blinked and felt another roll down my cheek on the other side. I didn't feel sadness or self-pity; where was this coming from? I lay back and breathed deep, focusing on her hands. It helped clear my head and it was more invigorating to dwell on the pleasure coursing into me.

But still, as I lay there, I felt tears slipping out at the corners of my eyes. What did it mean? I bit my lip and waited to see if Sidney would notice. I didn't want her to think I wasn't enjoying her techniques, but something in what she was doing was untwisting a knot I didn't even know was there.

"I'll submit to your advice for how to proceed." I offered in answer to her question. As I spoke, I heard my voice crack slightly as my mixing emotions were having an effect on my speech. I waited, curious to hear her view point.

 

[Sidney_1]

I could see the wash of emotions playing over Mr. Harris’s aura. Without the locked door of his intellect, his emotions moved through him without drama. He was now fully receptive and I could sense his mind, body, and spirit were now absorbing the energy around him and given to him through me.

My music was a mix of ambient electronic overlayed with soft drums. I always hoped that the drums would match up with the massage of the lower chakras to aid with release.

As Mr. Harris gave me implied consent, I placed more warmed oil on my hands and gently massaged his scrotum before gently replacing its weight on the table.

With more oil, I gently stroked his erection, from base to tip. A few strokes with just the palms of my hands, and then a few with a gentle squeeze of his glans on each upstroke. My left hand remained on Mr. Harris’s stomach to sense his sexual state. Some clients loved the sensual aspect and would moan gratefully; occasionally, others would curse my name with desire and beg for a release. Very rarely would a man ejaculate unexpectedly. . .I could usually sense it and adjust my technique if I felt as if a manual release would embarrass the client. I preferred sensual and erotic massages to be negotiated from the start, and not a surprise element. . .but, often it was necessary to integrate it on the first session for a complete healing experience.

“Mr. Harris, the penis is not a muscle, but an erection does bring oxygen to the area and helps to keep you feeling vibrant, sexually. This is a purely sensual part of your massage and I won’t work more intensely than this. . .but, I’d like you to really focus on the idea that I’m sending love to this area and that as you open up more, your sex life will only get better and better. You will love more deeply. Sometimes it is helpful to first receive this from a neutral party; someone like myself who can love others freely without attachment, and with full acceptance. We can talk about this further if you have questions in a future appointment, but for now, I want you to relax and be open to whatever your body wants to enjoy or release. You may hear me moan at times, because I do find healing work, and the male body beautiful in all it’s states. . . and I do love my work.”

As I continued to stroke Mr. Harris’s firm cock, I moaned softly. He had come so far, already. His groin had felt like one big abandoned zone, and I was hoping to enliven the area with warmth and hope.

“I strongly believe that we need to love ourselves, show love to ourselves, and receive love from others with good intentions to really thrive. You are not submitting to me. . . you are submitting to the idea that you are worthy and deserving of feeling good, Mr. Harris, in every area of your life. Sexual healing is important, too, by the way.”

I remained quiet for a few minutes, stroking very slowly, using just a few fingers at times, and allowed Mr. Harris to integrate these ideas with his bodily sensations before I stopped my movements, rebalanced him, and allowed him a few minutes of rest or private self release before turning over.

Despite being focused on Mr. Harris’s needs, my lust naturally stirred. I could feel my own juices between my legs and I fought the urge to remove my shirt and imagine Mr. Harris exploding onto my bare belly or chest. Therapy was never about satisfying my own needs, although I always made certain to be fully present and it was often very creative and erotic for me.

With Mark out of town, I knew I’d likely be taking care of my own needs (later) with the fantasy of riding him slowly and torturously until we both erupted and surrendered.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

My whole body responded when I felt Sidney's hand on my pleading shaft. I twisted and writhed ever so slightly from the tips of my toes up through the top of my head. Not until she touched me so intimately did I think about how long it had been since someone else had touched my cock. And it felt so good. Her long tapering fingers applied just the right amount of pressure and moved with just the right speed to allow my pleasure to build slowly like the steam in a tea pot. I slowly opened my eyes and looked up at her bending over me.

For a brief moment, I lost all thought of her as just a masseuse. My primal brain flashed images of throwing her onto this table and fucking her roughly and for my own pleasure. It made my cock pulse and twitch in her hands as bursts of animalistic pleasure raced through me. I was so focused on what she was doing and my own pleasure that I didn't really listen to what she said as she worked her hands to a steady pace up and down my cock.

“I strongly believe that we need to love ourselves, show love to ourselves, and receive love from others with good intentions to really thrive."

That line cut through it all and hit a pocket of self-loathing deep in my heart. I had to be honest with myself; I was not my own biggest fan. I thought back to the times where I would look at myself in the mirror with disappointment at what I looked like. I felt my brain about to tip over the lip into a rabbit hole of self-examination when a ripple of pleasure pushed through it all, pulling a groan of enjoyment from deep in my chest.

I lay there, feeling better than I had in a long time. Even masturbation hadn't felt this good. It was deeper than just having someone else stroking my cock. Something in how she was doing it felt amazing. I bit my lip as I looked up at her. Without a conscious thought to do so, my hand on her side reached out and began caressing the back of her thigh. My big, slightly rough hands slid up and down her soft warm skin. It felt so good to touch someone else again. I didn't even consider that Sidney wouldn't want me to, but she was touching me so intimately that it should matter.

"Can I see more of your form?" I asked, surprised at how forward I was becoming as she continued. I know that this visit wasn't about sexual gratification for either of us, but something in my brain had clicked over and I couldn't help but want more. I was greedy for my masseuse suddenly. I was not the same man that walked into her office and I didn't care. I wanted more.

 

[Sidney_1]

My hands had moved away from Mr. Harris’s penis and remained on his chest and abdomen, still, while his body rebalanced. Normally, I would have discouraged any touching by a client, but I sensed that any type of rejection would cause him to tense up again. I knew I had to be careful. He likely just forgot our professional relationship, and imagined that I was a lover. . .it was likely just instinctive.

“Yes, I can remove my shirt. Some clients actually bring me outfits that they like me to wear for their massage,” I said, as I removed the gray mesh shirt, revealing the cranberry push up bra.

“I know it feels good when your sexual energies are stimulated, but I’m going to ask you to do your best to keep your hands on the table unless I direct them elsewhere. I do incorporate all different modalities with clients, but that needs to be negotiated in advance. There is a reason that there is a song about ‘sexual healing’,” I said with a wink.

I smiled warmly at Mr. Harris. He was finally letting down more and more of his walls, and I knew it would be easier for him to release tension once he was on his back.

“I’m going to remain just like this until you feel ready to turn over so I can work on your back. Just let me know when you’re ready, Mr. Harris. I think you’ll find that your back is already starting to relax.”

 

[such_a_bad_man]

I lay there and felt myself staring as the mesh gray top came up and off without hesitation. I swallow down my lust as I see her full, round bosom in her elegant cranberry colored bra. Sidney is more enrapturing than I ever thought she could be. Then again, I didn't come here to meet a beautiful woman. I came to get my back worked on. She was right; I moved my hand off her leg and rested it beside me. "Sorry, that won't happen again," I told her, admonishing myself a little in my own head.

Her hands on my chest and stomach left my cock feeling very left out. She had spent such time channeling life and sexual energy into it while stroking it to life. Without her touch, I could feel myself deflating very quickly as the realization hit me that we weren't really here for that and that it was selfish of me to expect such a sudden gear change for our first visit. I draw a few long slow breaths to help calm myself. As I do, I can feel that her work on my chest hasn't faded yet and I feel like I'm breathing down to my toes with my deep breaths now. I shake my head incredulously at what just a short time with Sidney has netted for me physically. If she can do the same for my back, I shouldn't need a second visit. Then again, if she feels she can help me with more than my back, it might be worth the second visit.

I feel myself calming down despite looking at her in just a bra and skorts. I know that I'm going to have no trouble fantasizing about this when I get home. I shake that thought away. 'She's a professional, not some fantasy woman...' I tell myself before speaking up. "Okay, I think I'm ready to flip over now." I settle back, waiting for her to adjust the sheets.

 

[Sidney_1]

Mr. Harris seems at once shy and aroused at the sight of me, but he stares silently and then quietly apologizes.

“No need to apologize. There’s a time for everything, and I’ll do my best to be accommodating to you. Ok, let’s roll over,” I say, as I hold the sheets up while I lean over him at the head of the table.

I catch a faint whiff of my own floral perfume that I had habitually placed between my breasts. Mark had bought it for me a week after we met and had confessed that he had a fetish for smelling scent between my breasts. I tried to remember not to wear it to work, but fortunately, Mr. Harris didn’t seem to notice or mind.

With long, slow strokes, I ease any residual tension from his neck and around his shoulder blades. I lean close enough so that our bodies are still connected- his head is lightly touching just above my skort. There is definitely less tension than I expect, but still a fair amount around his shoulder blades.

I move to the side of the table and focus my attention around each of his scapulas, holding pressure on each “knot” and trigger point until I feel a release.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

She's already seen my cock, but as she holds the sheets up, I can't help but feel self-conscious as I roll over. I can feel it lay on my thigh and I have to adjust myself as I lay on my stomach and put my face in the ring supporting my head. It's all a bit embarrassing, and I don't know why. Still, once I'm back in place, the sounds and the smells of the room pull me back down into the relaxed state again. It feels good to just lay there for a moment while Sidney adjusts the sheets over by ass and legs. With her help and the effect of the aromatherapy in the room, the table feels more comfortable then my bed ever has.

Then, she steps close enough that the top of my head brushes her bare belly. Even that casual touch sends my body racing to react. Touching her skin anywhere has such a powerful effect on my arousal now that I can feel myself growing again as I lay on my stomach. Strangely, that's the only tension I feel as I lay there. As her hands sweep over my back, it feels better than it has in months. Maybe she was right that my back was reacting to bad habits in mychest and shoulders. I blink as I stare at the floor through the hole, considering her diagnosis a little more.

Even stranger, I thought there might be more directed massage at the knots in my back. Instead, her warm hands press directly on them one by one and I feel them melt away, uncoiling on their own. I furrow my brow as Sidney shows me how little I understand about massage. After the first few open up, I groan deep in my chest as I feel my pain starting to leave and I can breathe so much easier. Between her work on my chest and my back loosening, my chest feels like a bellows now. Breath coming and going with great blasts of air now. I smile to myself, but dare not move while Sidney continues.

 

[Sidney_1]

Once I sense that the tightest knots are starting to release, I move down to Mr. Harris’s flanks with effleurage and upward sweeping movements. His unconscious groans indicate changes are happening on multiple levels, but I know I need to push it even further, as his personality is somewhat rigid and I can sense that his body would tighten back up within 2 days.

“We’re going to work just a bit deeper, Mr. Harris, and really open up that chest to counteract your posture at your desk,” I say as I climb atop the table and rest my weight on my heels.

I firmly stroke with my palms and my body weight from the base of Mr. Harris’s spine all the way up to his shoulders to make sure all his muscles feel balanced. After a few strokes, and some soft moans, I feel confident that he’s balanced.

I gently place Mr. Harris’s hands around the back of my thighs, right underneath my buttocks to stretch his chest open further. I lean forward to press his shoulders up and back.

“I know this feels a bit awkward, but we’re teaching your body some new postural techniques.”

After a few deep breaths, I release my hands from Mr. Harris’s shoulders, maintaining my contact at the base of his spine. I wait for his arms to drop back to the table before I dismount and prepare him for one final rebalancing.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

“We’re going to work just a bit deeper, Mr. Harris, and really open up that chest to counteract your posture at your desk.”

I nod at her words as best I can with my face in the comfort ring of her table. "Makes sense." I say, but I'm not sure how well she can hear me as she slips up onto the table with me. My eyes widen as she straddles my ass, her own firm buttocks resting on mine briefly as she adjusts herself. Then, she begins to massage me and I finally know how sugar cookies feel.

With the added force of her body weight behind them, her hands slide up my spine and I wheeze out as she goes. Her strong hands pushing the air from me as I lay there. I don't know if that is the purpose, but it happens with each pass. Once she is done, I don't feel any tightenss in my chest of back any more. I smile to myself as I breathe so easily now. But as she grabs my arms, I wonder what she is intending.

Again, my eyes widen as she folds my hands around behind each thigh. I want to ask what she's doing, but she's beaten me to the punch again.

“I know this feels a bit awkward, but we’re teaching your body some new postural techniques.”

"Oh... okay then." It is a bit strange as I don't find myself in this position very often. Even so, I feel my muscles stretching across my chest as I have to roll my shoulders back to do this position. The added bonus of feeling Sidney's lithe thighs is something just for me, I hope. Again, working on my chest like this, pushes on my lungs which make me wheeze out as my back and shoulders get more work. This has been the most awkward part of my visit so far, but the results don't lie. I feel so much better as she finishes and I ease my hands back to the table. "Mmmmm.... that feels incredible. I have no trouble breathing now, even though I am laying on my chest." I confess, not sure she can hear me because I have to speak out the bottom of the table.

 

[Sidney_1]

“It’s definitely a good stretch to counteract your desk posture. I doubt you’ll feel any residual soreness, but don’t be surprised if you do,” I said as I dismounted from the table.

Mr. Harris was breathing slowly and regularly, and I could sense he had a more relaxed mien. Despite his resistance, he had allowed just a bit of a new experience to expand his possibilities of what was available to him.

I covered the draping sheet over his back. With light, sweeping movements, I ran my hands lightly over the length of his body from his head to his toes, brushing off his physical body vertically and then horizontally.

Although I could have let the massage conclude there, as Mr. Harris was relaxed, I sensed he did want to ‘see’ me, and that it would help him to feel more embodied.

“Wonderful, when you’re ready, just roll onto your back, and I’ll balance and ground your energy one last time. You can keep your eyes open or closed,” I smiled.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

“It’s definitely a good stretch to counteract your desk posture. I doubt you’ll feel any residual soreness, but don’t be surprised if you do,”

I nod, acknowledging her advice. Part of me was a little disappointed as she slipped off of me. I was hoping to stay under her, but it felt like our time was wrapping up. The sheet came back up, covering me again and for a moment, I contemplated drifting to sleep. I was so comfortable and warm in this room; the music playing added to the calming atmosphere and it would be so easy. It is late though, and I should get home. After my time with Sidney, I should have no trouble sleeping tonight.

“Wonderful, when you’re ready, just roll onto your back, and I’ll balance and ground your energy one last time. You can keep your eyes open or closed,”

I nod again and turn over slowly. I grab the sheet and help keep it over my body as I roll onto my back. Once again, I breathe deep and feel it so deep in my chest. If anything, such a deep breath helps wake me back up again. I smile over at Sidney as I lay back. She looks so desirable in her colored bra and tight skorts. I bite my lip as I lay my head back, waiting for her to finish up. I already know that I want to come back again. I have to spend more time with this enticing, caring woman.

Her talk of sexual therapy is still burning deep in my mind. I know it shouldn't be a big deal to talk about it as she mentioned it herself, but something in me feels like I would be overstepping my bounds to inquire about that. It all felt so sordid, but I couldn't help but think about it. Still, I remained quiet, keeping it to myself as our session was about to come to an end. I lay back, waiting for Sidney to perform the last step.

 

[Sidney_1]

Mr. Harris slowly turns over, which is a good sign that he feels relaxed and transformed. I smile gently as his eyes meet mine.

With both hands, I lightly touch the top of his head, his crown chakra, and breathe slowly, until I feel his energy is balanced. I move slowly downwards; and while Mr. Harris appears relaxed, I can still sense a nervousness as I move to his solar plexus.

“Just let go and relax completely, Mr. Harris. Let the stagnated feelings go and allow any new feelings to enter without judgment,” I say, in timing with my hands on the side of his hips, the closest that I’m comfortable to being to his first chakra.

“Yes, just take a few breaths here.”

After a few breaths, I make long sweeping strokes down the length of his upper body, arms, and legs, shaking my hands at end end point until I sense a feeling of completion and calmness in Mr. Harris.

I walk quietly to his side, careful not to keep my hands away from his body.

“That concludes your massage, Mr. Harris. Some clients enjoy taking five minutes to just deeply relax with their eyes closes after their massage, or to focus on the pleasurable sensations in their body for a few minutes. So, I can set a timer for you if you’d like. If you’d like to skip that; that is fine, just move slowly as you sit up so that you don’t feel dizzy. I think we worked deeply on a lot of levels on your body, so you will feel lighter, literally, but your brain hasn’t gotten the message yet. If you like, we can take a few minutes to discuss your session and I can make some suggestions to help you feel vibrant. I made a lot of suggestions as they occurred to me during your massage, but if you forgot them, then I can try to sum them up. Okay? I’ll set a wind chime alert, just in case you’d like to deeply relax, and if not, then I’ll meet you up front whenever you’re ready.”

I slip my mesh shirt on as I pause at the door in case Mr. Harris is able to speak in his relaxed state.

 

[such_a_bad_man]

I lay there and felt a soothing calming energy spreading through my body and mind. It pushed the idea about a sexual therapy visit away and unknotted the ball of nervous energy I was carrying about it. I breathed deep through my nose again. I hadn't noticed, by my chest was rising and falling much more as I breathed now. I closed my eyes and considered Sidney's words. I wasn't sure what I needed or wanted right now. I lay there, letting my body feel this relaxed state fully as I considerd everything Sidney had said since I walked in. The clack of her shoes as she walked to the door resounded in my ears and before she could leave, I had to say something. "Sidney..." I said into the darkness around me. "Thank you..." I said simply as I lay there under the sheet, really feeling myself breathe for maybe the first time.

The door opened and closed and I was left alone in the massage suite. I let my mind wander of everything that had happened since I arrived. I could picture myself walking into the office to start the appointment and as I replayed my behavior upon meeting and talking with Sidney at the start, I felt so disgusted and disappointed in myself. I don't know if I really apologized for being such a brick wall to her approach initially.

What my mind gripped to was when I started weeping on the table. The tears flowed so easily, yet I wasn't sad. As I lay there, I kept tugging at that string, trying to unravel it. Before I can get very farr, the wind chimes began to play. They are soothing in their own right and I sit up slowly. As Sidney said, my body did feel lighter. It wasn't such a strain to sit up from a laying position. My back didn't even twinge as I did it. I smiled to myself as I took another huge breath of air. I slid off the table and returned to my changing room. As I drop the sheet, I look at the small shower stall in the room. You hadn't said anything about leaving the oil on my skin, but it feels... strange.

Opting to feel clean, I shower quickly and redress before walking to Sidney's office. I walk back in, my hair still a little damp as I sit back down again. I can't even look her in the eyes as I start.

"Sidney, let me begin by apologizing for my attitude when I arrived. I can see now that such an approach was not conducive to a healthy start to our work. I can already feel my body responding to what you did. I... I hope we can keep working until I don't need your help anymore... but I hope you'll let me keep coming... er, returning..." I swallow hard, kicking myself for the poor word choice.

 

[Sidney_1]

Wrap-up visit 1

Upon returning to my office, I exchanged clothes once again for something less revealing, but informal. It was Friday, my last appointment of the week, but I tried to never appear sloppy. I slipped a snug white tank and black lounge pants. . . it was casual. . .but, not atypical if I had to run out for an errand or relax at home. Surely Mr. Harris had to know that he was my last appointment as it was 8:45 pm on a Friday.

I gathered my tote and suit while I waited for Mr. Harris to return. It was always interesting to hear the client’s response to the session.

Mr. Harris entered my office quietly, avoiding eye contact.

"Sidney, let me begin by apologizing for my attitude when I arrived. I can see now that such an approach was not conducive to a healthy start to our work. I can already feel my body responding to what you did. I... I hope we can keep working until I don't need your help anymore... but I hope you'll let me keep coming... er, returning..."

“No need to apologize, Mr. Harris. Most clients are referred to me through a prior client, so some of them might be more prepared for my style. . . although I do work with each client a bit differently. I’m sure your doctor referred you to me because he might have heard about me through his other patients. I’m not certain.

In any case, I’m glad you were willing to be open during your massage therapy session. I try to make them as personal and as nurturing as possible. I’m glad that you can feel a difference already. I know you were quite tense and rigid in many regards when we first started, but I applaud you for being open.

You’ll find that when your mind relaxes, your body will follow suit. Or, vice versa. That's why people come to me. I think if you make the changes that you mentioned and that I discussed during your massage. . .taking frequent breaks, stretching every few minutes. . . you should see significant relief in your muscle tension. You’ll start to feel more vibrant and energetic.

But, yes, I think a follow up appointment within a week to ten days would be good for you. Are there any questions that you have about anything we’ve done or that I’ve suggested during your massage? Please don't be surprised or concerned if you feel a full range of emotions and sensations in the coming week.”

I sip a glass of water and then get up to take a water out of the fridge for Mr. Harris.

“Please… take it to go. Try to drink a lot of water tomorrow. It’s hard to explain, but I’ve literally changed some of your energetic patterns and your body will want to hold onto the old way of doing things and handling life. Water will help to keep you in the new, healthier pattern of being.”

 

[such_a_bad_man]

I stood up from the chair and accepted the bottle of water. I opened my phone and looked at next week's schedule as she had mentioned a follow-up appointment. I did feel fine, but we were starting my healing so there was a good chance that I'll be in need of Sidney's service again. "I hate to deprive you of the start of your weekend, but is it possible to meet at this time next week? I can't really get away from work during the day and my weekends are usually packed as I like to stay busy. If this doesn't work for your scedule, I can move some things around over the weekend and call back on Monday." I offer, looking hopefully at Sidney as she stood there.

Even in her casual looking outfit, she still looked stunning to me. I guess that my mind was filling in the image with what I saw when she was working on my massage earlier. I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to see her again. Another thing eats at me; I hesitate to ask as we have only wrapped up our first session. Sidney did mention it during the session so maybe she would be okay with it. "I, uh..."

But I froze. A part of my brain realized what I was about to ask and shut me up very quickly. "I... wanted to say again that I appreciate how much of a help you've been today. I'll take your messages to heart and be mindful of them this week. Thank you." I say, turning for the door before she can read my awkwardness any more.

I move for the door, moving slowly to give Sidney one more chance to stop me if there was more she wanted to say.