when is masturbation an addiction?
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KokopelliRises
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It becomes an addiction when it interferes with your everyday life: school, work, relationships.
Which is pretty much the definition of addiction for any activity. I have a friend who's getting close to this point with World of Warcraft and I'm a little concerned we'll have to arrange an intervention soon.
VelvetDarkness
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It becomes an addiction when you're compelled to discuss it on a porn board, while typing with just the one hand.
That's actually a little sad to hear.
DrHappy
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I thought that KokopelliRises had the best answer so far. I'll amend her answer and add the word significantly.
It becomes an addiction when it significantly interferes with your everyday life: school, work, relationships.
What is significant is a little gray and not everyone would agree, but I think that most people would agree that any of the following would be significant:
Are doing it 2-3 times a day? 20 times a day? 45 minutes a day? 4 hours a day?
It becomes an addiction when it significantly interferes with your everyday life: school, work, relationships.
What is significant is a little gray and not everyone would agree, but I think that most people would agree that any of the following would be significant:
- You are avoiding going out with friends so that you can masturbate.
- You are avoiding real sex on a regular basis (assuming that you have a SO) so that you can masturbate.
- Your work or school is significantly suffering.
- You are engaging in risky (and possibly illegal) behavior by masturbating in a public place.
Are doing it 2-3 times a day? 20 times a day? 45 minutes a day? 4 hours a day?
NymphGoddess
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enough of being verbose...it's when you're a nymphomaniac
significant is a good word. maybe i'm coming up to that point. no pun intended. it does kind of effect my work. hmm. but if it takes an hour each time, twice a day, that's 14 hours a week. it's like a part time job.
i'm not avoiding sex. just can't get any.
except with myself and who am i to resist. *daydreams of a threesome.... me and two hands*
i'm not avoiding sex. just can't get any.
except with myself and who am i to resist. *daydreams of a threesome.... me and two hands*
SweetErika
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That sounds like a problem. Being a problem masturbator (or drinker, drug user, gambler, shopper, etc.) doesn't necessarily mean you're an addict, it just means your behavior is affecting your life in one or more negative ways and you may very well be on the road to addiction.significant is a good word. maybe i'm coming up to that point. no pun intended. it does kind of effect my work. hmm. but if it takes an hour each time, twice a day, that's 14 hours a week. it's like a part time job.
i'm not avoiding sex. just can't get any.
If you masturbated less, would it still take you an hour each time? Have you tried cutting back your session frequency, time and altering your routine to see if it helps you come quicker?
Maybe you can't get sex because you're so into having sex with yourself and/or desperate. What if you spent like half of the time you currently spend masturbating doing something that involves bettering yourself and meeting/socializing with a variety of people? Add some of the time you spend online to that, and you'd really have a hobby and social life or part-time job.
Have you considered the possibility that your masturbation problem, insomnia/death thoughts and dating troubles all have a common origin, like depression and/or anxiety? If not, that's something you should seriously look at with a professional. Problems like these often resolve themselves (or just much easier) when the root cause is treated; by the same token, they keep coming back (sometimes with more force/severity) when the root cause is mostly ignored or untreated.
Alcoholism is tested for by applying the CAGE test, a questionaire that's really only after four questions:
Have you ever tried to Cut down?
Are you Annoyed by others criticizing your use?
Have you felt Guilty for using?
Do you use it as an Eyeopener? (ie, you just don't feel right in the morning until you have a beer)
The way it works is that if you say yes to at least 3 of the 4, you are an alcoholic. If you say yes to only 2, maybe there's mild concern, but you're not technically an alcoholic. If you say yes to only 1, you're in the clear.
Now... that's for alcoholism. Obviously masturbation is different in a number of important ways, but it's useful for comparison. The main issue at hand is whether you personally think you do it too much... if you feel guilty for it, try to do it less but can't and you actually have people bitching you out for doing it too much... that's an addiction. You could do it 5 times a day most days and have none of those things be true, in which case it isn't.
Of course, at that point, "addiction" isn't that helpful a concept. It really just means "it's a problem for you," which you already know whether or not you use that word. Do you think you do it too much? Then try to do it less. If you can't despite trying, there are a few anti-addiction techniques that may be helpful, but I'll save that for another post.
Have you ever tried to Cut down?
Are you Annoyed by others criticizing your use?
Have you felt Guilty for using?
Do you use it as an Eyeopener? (ie, you just don't feel right in the morning until you have a beer)
The way it works is that if you say yes to at least 3 of the 4, you are an alcoholic. If you say yes to only 2, maybe there's mild concern, but you're not technically an alcoholic. If you say yes to only 1, you're in the clear.
Now... that's for alcoholism. Obviously masturbation is different in a number of important ways, but it's useful for comparison. The main issue at hand is whether you personally think you do it too much... if you feel guilty for it, try to do it less but can't and you actually have people bitching you out for doing it too much... that's an addiction. You could do it 5 times a day most days and have none of those things be true, in which case it isn't.
Of course, at that point, "addiction" isn't that helpful a concept. It really just means "it's a problem for you," which you already know whether or not you use that word. Do you think you do it too much? Then try to do it less. If you can't despite trying, there are a few anti-addiction techniques that may be helpful, but I'll save that for another post.
SweetErika
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No, you misread.
He said he does masturbates TWICE a day for an HOUR each time, so TWO HOURS total daily, or FOURTEEN HOURS each week.
In other words, while you're spending 15 minutes a day, he's spending 120 minutes, or EIGHT times more time than you do masturbating.
Elenia26
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No, you misread.
He said he does masturbates TWICE a day for an HOUR each time, so TWO HOURS total daily, or FOURTEEN HOURS each week.
In other words, while you're spending 15 minutes a day, he's spending 120 minutes, or EIGHT times more time than you do masturbating.
I did misread it, just because I really couldn't believe it.
Here is my next question then to the OP - does it take you an hour to come? Or do you come multiple times in that hour?
How do you ever get out the door????
just once each time. like now. i should be sleeping but i'm wanking. i just have to. in the morning so i don't get the random boner. at night to sleep. and it's nicer at night. not rushed.
i get out the door rushed. an it just takes an hour. i tried to build up some endurance and then it stuck. an hour. i've done 15 minutes. that's fast for me but i feel rushed then. it's not as good.
i get out the door rushed. an it just takes an hour. i tried to build up some endurance and then it stuck. an hour. i've done 15 minutes. that's fast for me but i feel rushed then. it's not as good.
see? i timed myself. i made posts before to see how long it takes. about an hour. *wonders what a gf would think, or if she'd stay up for it that long*
16 minutes here. but i started shortly before that. possibly i cut it down to 40-45 minutes but it also doesn't feel as good. a little rushed. and i'm sore. going faster kinda hurts. maybe i'm desensitized but it will take more time to get that back.
six hours of sleep again. crap. gets lonely too. sometimes i'm looking for something new or someone who's nice.
16 minutes here. but i started shortly before that. possibly i cut it down to 40-45 minutes but it also doesn't feel as good. a little rushed. and i'm sore. going faster kinda hurts. maybe i'm desensitized but it will take more time to get that back.
six hours of sleep again. crap. gets lonely too. sometimes i'm looking for something new or someone who's nice.
FloridaSmoothie
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Hanon, your post "*examines penis* i think i have scar marks from wanking. not scars exactly but worn spots. lol skin turns darker from rubbing. lol i have a multi-hued penis. lol" is very close to home for me! Before getting married, I had a masturbation weekend where the same thing happened to mine, and I used lube. Still have the dark spot.
tastylover
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If you can't stop, its an addiction.
ms_sub_liminal
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uninstall it from their computer, hide the disks, then change their password so they can't download it.
