Now where do I find online sub? BDSM personel shortage of Ladies?

Now where do I find online sub? BDSM personel shortage of Ladies?

Hi there everyone,

I'm newbie here and I don't have any sub/slave or anything [not even vanilla]
I'm single, 21 yrs. Face nice, athletic body.

I went to BDSM personel forum, but to my disappointment, its dead, I mean no new ads from ladies, and the ones who posted haven't checked in since 10-15 days. Looks like there is shortage of sub females here, so where do i find ? let me know some good FREE website/ forum name [don't give me link of anything that involves free registration but you need to buy that golden membership thingy in order to reply to those lovely looking lady profiles , I mean adultfriendfinder type of things, i don't want it.]

After looking at the BDSM glossary, let me describe myself.

I'm a dom without any XP,

I don't want 24/7 [cause I don't have a separate home] I m looking for online thing online, I don't want anything offline
I'm not into abrasion
Age play, anal looks interesting!
I'm not into bad pain,
I don't have money to buy slave in auction !
I like to have some contract [not legal binding]
I'm not into Edgeplay,
I'm not in golden shower,
No gunplay, blood etc

yes i do want to learn the Handkerchie codes,
I'm not in mummification, or needleplay.

I'm a newbie,
I'm NOT a prodom,
my safe word would be RED
yes, I'm interested in vanilla too.
I'm more of a low protocol person!


I'm newbie here and I don't have any sub/slave or anything [not even vanilla]
I'm single, 21 yrs. Face nice, athletic body.

I've yahoo messenger for chat.

You don't want a 24/7 relationship, but do you want an in-person or online-only relationship?

If you're looking for a real-life/in person relationship, I suspect you'll have trouble finding female subs on Lit Personals and most of the popular dating sites because most of the members are not from India. In all of my time here, I have seen very few people from India, and the ones I have seen are males. The same is true for the dating sites I frequent.

You might have better luck if you're looking for an online relationship.

I'm sure there are India/Indian dating sites and forums. Have you thought about trying to meet people on those? Maybe you'd even meet an Indian living in another country who is willing to move back home, or have you come live with her, if your relationship goes well online and on the phone.

If you do post a personal ad, do talk about who you are as a person, use your best language skills (proofread, spellcheck and don't use chat/text speak, like "u" for "you") and avoid making a list like you have above. It's fine to talk about your interests and hard limits, but the list makes you seem inflexible, only concerned with what you like, lazy and somewhat fake.

Put a good amount of effort into showing your personality, interests, talking about the type of person and relationship you're seeking (don't get too specific, though) and what you have to offer the right person. A 21 year old who has no home of his own, experience and lots of dislikes doesn't sound as appealing as a young, smart, funny, caring guy who likes a lot of kinky and vanilla activities.

Also, slave auctions are fantasy (at least in Western nations - they probably take place in some parts of the world, but are unlikely to be consensual slaves) and the handkerchief thing is not usually used by heterosexuals (it originated with gay men). I've never seen anyone with a handkerchief in their back pocket.

Another thing is (and I know this may seem unfair and frustrating) that you say you have no experience and very little knowledge relative to other people in the lifestyle. That's fine--we all have to start somewhere--but I can't see a lot of subs jumping for the chance at a relationship with someone who has so little experience and knowledge.

So, I think you would be smart to learn a lot more and see if you can find some BDSM groups and clubs in India that will hopefully allow you to learn even more, practice some skills and meet others with similar interests. Click Me for a listing of some of the groups in India, and you can find Yahoo groups and such by googling 'bdsm groups India' and similar terms.

Reading and talking to people online are great tools, but there's really no substitute for learning by watching and doing. Hopefully you can find some local groups or clubs that have classes/demonstrations and people who will allow you to try out techniques on them. Some people will not play with young Doms and/or newbies at all, but I've found many subs/bottoms who are very willing to help new Doms/Tops practice, as long as it's done in a safe and smart way.

Many Doms and subs take a good amount of time to learn a lot when they enter the lifestyle before even considering looking for a relationship. Doing so helps them to be safer, communicate better and find better matches when they are ready to start looking. You have plenty of time to find your first relationship, so I think it would be wise to wait until you know more to go searching for it. After all, you may find the right sub, but the relationship could fail because you're too new and lack the necessary ingredients for a successful relationship! However, if you learn more, and meet the same sub in a year or three, it might be a perfect, lasting match.

@sweet erica

Thanks for such a long reply!

but i'm searing something online, i mean not looking for anything offline sinec i know its hard to find offline.

@Erika

I'm sorry for making u type so much, I'm not looking for anything offline sorry I forgot to mention that

*points at the personals*

Thar she blows, cap'n!

@all

theslaveregister.com is also a good free website, with lot personals and all, though i've been without anything there though being active and nice.

[posted this so you don't advice me to go to TSR []

what does that mean?

FungiUg said:

*points at the personals*

Thar she blows, cap'n!

Click to expand...

i m confused???

Sir_Joe said:

i m confused???

Click to expand...

There have been several threads in the BDSM personals about good places to find more people.

Literotica isn't a great choice for finding a partner, even an online one. The people here generally come here to chat and talk and hang out, rather than to pick up (or be picked up).

So back in the personals section, find the threads that tell you where else you can look. They will mention sites like bondage.com, alt.com, collarme.com and so on. Those sites are specifically oriented towards meet/mix/match etc.

let me try

FungiUg said:

There have been several threads in the BDSM personals about good places to find more people.

Literotica isn't a great choice for finding a partner, even an online one. The people here generally come here to chat and talk and hang out, rather than to pick up (or be picked up).

So back in the personals section, find the threads that tell you where else you can look. They will mention sites like bondage.com, alt.com, collarme.com and so on. Those sites are specifically oriented towards meet/mix/match etc.

Click to expand...

thanks for the advice, let me try out

Collarme ruled out

collarme.com

i checked it, too many fake people from india listed to increse the traffic.

most of them are posh prostitute from india

Sir_Joe said:

collarme.com

i checked it, too many fake people from india listed to increse the traffic.

Click to expand...

i know india very well, [that's why not seeking anything offline]

bondage.com also ruled out

Upgrade to Premium for advanced search features [means one way or the other, it'll ask u to pay if u want to reply to the lady profile u're interested.]

there are only 2 places i trust for being FREE and genuine people
TSR
Literotica

on most paysites, they're likely to put fake lady profiles [and showing them online] to increase traffic.

they keep eye on ur I.P. adress, I'm from india, so look they're showing me girls from my city, while i know all of them are fake.

to the new people , CAREFUL

I finally decided..

I'm going to stay here on Lit and on TSR,
make friendship with people know more abt the stuff,

lets wait and watch and see where the things go.

I know this world is big and there IS atlest one lady for some online company

copy paste post to increase my post count to 100 so that i can have an Avatar like the others.

CutieMouse said:

And don't copy/paste to get your post count up... it's tacky. There are fluffy nonsense posts in the BDSM Cafe where you can actually make individual posts to get your count high enough for an avatar...

Click to expand...

Great minds....

http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=24389112&postcount=12

Thanks for the advice

CutieMouse said:

Ok.

Anyplace you .....................u can actually make individual posts to get your count high enough for an avatar...

Click to expand...

Though i've reached almost 90 with that cheap trick, but i'll keep ur advice in mind.

thanks for taking tiem in replying

Is English your first language? I'm just curious. I see signs it might not be. Getting some background on a person, reading read posts even fluffy ones can help you find someone and they, you.

no engish is not my first language

FurryFury said:

Is English your first language? I'm just curious. I see signs it might not be. Getting some background on a person, reading read posts even fluffy ones can help you find someone and they, you.

Click to expand...

I'm indian and in india
let me send u a pm on details abt me

*****

ok no problem

CutieMouse said:

In case you didn't pick up on it... my comment was a polite way of pointing out you aren't making a very good first impression.

Click to expand...

and this makes my 96th posts

i m trying to be as nice and polite as i can but if i fail to make a good 1st impression then i m sorry, i can't fake to be acting like someone that i m not

..........

nice avatar subbie !

silent_subbie said:

I think theres alot of free sub's around here Joe, good luck with finding ya the special one!

Click to expand...

so finally u crossed the 100th mark huh? i m also near just a 3 more posts

thanks for ur 2 cents

CutieMouse said:

You are polite, and obviously enthusiastic...

[perso.............
Just my two cents...

Click to expand...

i don't know why i got so eager to have my own avatar and started doing that useless junk post. anyway its too late, to undo my mistake, i'll be careful in future.

right now going to sleep. good night everyone