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Pre-masturbation ideas

Something it isn't

I suppose all of the ideas to get in the mood have been covered. Everyone else just wants to turn this thread into something it isn't.
 
Before you start and while your clothes are still on lay down and decide what you want to think about, something that excites you sexually. Then start at the beginning, did you meet at a bar, in a library, at a campground? Let it play out from the beginning, the kissing, the touching, the conversation. When you start to get excited touch yourself from outside your clothes until you're more than a little excited. When you reach inside your pants use a little lube so it's not like "rubbing your hands together", you can google all kinds of alternatives that you probably have in your house if you don't have any real lube.

That's my suggestion.
 
Last edited:
kitkate007 said:
Before you start and while your clothes are still on lay down and decide what you want to think about, something that excites you sexually. Then start at the beginning, did you meet at a bar, in a library, at a campground? Let it play out from the beginning, the kissing, the touching, the conversation. When you start to get excited touch yourself from outside your clothes until you're more than a little excited. When you reach inside your pants use a little lube so it's not like "rubbing your hands together", you can google all kinds of alternatives that you probably have in your house if you don't have any real lube.

I was raised very religiously and I would feel tremendous guilt if I thought about a real person because it was "adultery". I'm not sure if this is case for you, but if it is what worked for me was making up a man in my head. Giving him a name that I had never heard of before in my life and assuring myself that he wasn't a real person.

That's my suggestion.
Click to expand...

You have advice for masturbation. I'm looking for advice for getting in the mood from other women.
 
greengamegirl said:
I suppose all of the ideas to get in the mood have been covered. Everyone else just wants to turn this thread into something it isn't.
Click to expand...

I do understand, and I think that they're trying to understand, too. It's just outside their experience, and they don't know how to be helpful.

One think that hasn't been mentioned is psychotropic drugs (other than alcohol). For me, marijuana has been a big help, and it was psilocybin (aka magic mushrooms) that really broke the log-jam. Both of them got me to see my body in a different sort of way. Although I'd masturbated before, and gotten myself off now and then, it was very random and hit-or-miss. It was pretty much a matter of giving myself permission, so to speak. I'd done that already on one level, as it appears that you have, but there was something holding me back that didn't become apparent until the psilocybin forced me to pay attention to it. I realized that my not being able to "get in the mood" was an extension of my reluctance to probe my sexual side, and all the "mood enhancers" in the world wouldn't have helped me.

I do recommend that you don't do this on your own. I had an experienced guide whom I trusted. (And no, we didn't make love or stimulate each other sexually, we just talked about what I was experiencing.) Maybe it's something you can to with a therapist; I don't know.

One more thing: if you haven't had a pelvic exam or a PAP smear, I suggest you do it. And I add my vote to robertreams's suggestion to get a copy of "Our Bodies, Ourselves."
 
Athalia said:
I do understand, and I think that they're trying to understand, too. It's just outside their experience, and they don't know how to be helpful.

One think that hasn't been mentioned is psychotropic drugs (other than alcohol). For me, marijuana has been a big help, and it was psilocybin (aka magic mushrooms) that really broke the log-jam. Both of them got me to see my body in a different sort of way. Although I'd masturbated before, and gotten myself off now and then, it was very random and hit-or-miss. It was pretty much a matter of giving myself permission, so to speak. I'd done that already on one level, as it appears that you have, but there was something holding me back that didn't become apparent until the psilocybin forced me to pay attention to it. I realized that my not being able to "get in the mood" was an extension of my reluctance to probe my sexual side, and all the "mood enhancers" in the world wouldn't have helped me.

I do recommend that you don't do this on your own. I had an experienced guide whom I trusted. (And no, we didn't make love or stimulate each other sexually, we just talked about what I was experiencing.) Maybe it's something you can to with a therapist; I don't know.

One more thing: if you haven't had a pelvic exam or a PAP smear, I suggest you do it. And I add my vote to robertreams's suggestion to get a copy of "Our Bodies, Ourselves."
Click to expand...

Okay but it isn't an everyday occurrence. I would just like to be able to do it more often or be in the mood more often. It seems difficult for people to grasp this. Sometimes I'm in the mood already but some days I'm not. Hopefully this helps it make sense for everyone. I don't have problems masturbating. Some days are just better than others. Maybe that is how it should be and this thread is pointless.
 
Back on track

I already masturbate and know how to masturbate. I would like to more often.

I'm looking for advice to get into the mood for days that I'm not.

I don't need masturbation advice.
 
???

Everyone else seems to wait to be in the mood to masturbate or they are always in the mood. I can see how it would be beyond those people to think of the possibility that someone could not be in the mood but want to get themselves in the mood so they can masturbate anyway.

It might be hard for some people to understand but sometimes I don't want to wait around to be in the mood.

It also doesn't matter to me if I have an orgasm or not. When it happens great but if not it doesn't matter.

If there aren't anymore ideas for how to get in the mood, then that's fine.

However, the how to masturbate and related posts are way off topic.

Once I'm in the mood, I can take it from there. I don't need help.
 
Lower my expectations

Based on the responses I should lower my expectations. I should only masturbate when I'm in the mood because getting myself in the mood seems to be ridiculous.

I don't believe this but it sounds like this is what people are trying to tell me.
 
Don't wait for the stars to align - get up there and start hoicking them about and see if that does anything. General wellbeing enhances one's interest in sex. Try looking after yourself, see if that helps anything. Exercise helps me. Maybe it will help you, too. If not, there's always bubblebaths.
 
Closed

Never mind, most of the posters don't know the difference between advice for getting in the mood to masturbate and masturbation advice. I was asking for the former, not the latter. Alternatively most people tried to turn this post into something else. I should have just called it getting in the mood but that probably would have still confused everyone.

People can continue to post for their own entertainment but I'm done with this thread.
 
Okay. Generally I don't have much problem getting in the mood to do it. However, as a prelude to the actual down and dirty, I enjoy just lying naked and thinking dirty thoughts, rubbing my breasts/body against the bed, or I have a very soft fluffy blanket I enjoy rubbing against myself. I don't mean between my legs, just all over, especially my face, neck and breasts. I will tease myself until I know I am wet and aroused before even going for any downstairs action.

Sometimes, if I am really into it, and feeling very focused, I try to separate the two different sensations. Those of my hands and those of my body. As I run my hands over my skin, I try to isolate the feeling of being touched, and the feeling of my hands doing the touching. When it works, it's awesome. I jokingly say it's the closest I will get to having sex with a woman. :D
 
greengamegirl said:
I'm looking for advice from other women on what I can do before I masturbate to make my experience better. I have a thread about advice for curious beginners. I'm hoping this angle will be more helpful to me and any other women who encounter similar problems. Some people may not have read the previous thread so I will provide a little information about myself. I will also try to answer the questions I was frequently asked from the other thread.

First, I'm 24 and I'm a virgin in every sense of the word. Some people will understand what this means but I will provide clarification for others. It means I haven't had vaginal, oral or anal sex. I haven't experienced foreplay and I haven't been kissed. I have been groped so I've been touched that way. There wasn't anything erotic about those experiences. I've never had a boyfriend and I don't have one right now. I'm also straight. I'm also a women. I've never had a pelvic exam or pap smear. It also doesn't bother me that I'm a virgin and I don't need to be saved from being a virgin. (I only added this because of some crazy PMs I get sometimes).

I don't want this thread or PMs to focus on my virginity so hopefully this short paragraph answers all of the questions I usually receive when people find out. If any of this seems too detailed, the purpose is to avoid the same PMs over and over. I apologize to everyone who could have easily figured out all of this on their own.

Second, I have masturbated before. I'm looking for advice on how to make it more enjoyable. I've also tried to find other threads like this. I could have been looking in the wrong places but I didn't find something quite like this. My problem is that I usually just end up touching myself and it just feels like I'm touching myself. It doesn't feel good. It feels as good as rubbing my hands together. I've also tried rubbing against things. I usually end up frustrating myself.

I'm mainly looking for advice from other women. It can be through a PM if anybody doesn't want to post in the thread. I don't want to offend any men but their advice won't be helpful unless they used to a woman or something. I've received advice before and most of it is along the lines of watch porn or they would have to see to help. I hope I have provided enough detail and this thread doesn't get too off topic.
Click to expand...

Have you ever thought the reason you can't experience anything is because you're not looking at what you want properly? Maybe you're watching porn with a man and a woman having sex. Maybe you should be watching a fantasy rape scene? Just a thought, but it sounds like you need to explore a darker lifestyle that what it sounds like you need. Prepping before a masturbation experience is perfectly fine, but the problem is you need to already be ready for it. Think of masturbation as just a way to relieve what's built up from earlier. My sub, Sarah, was the same way. She wasn't a virgin, but she had been very vanilla, didn't know how to play with herself, wasn't sure what it should feel like, etc. Nothing worked until a little pain was introduced. We watched a humiliation scene of a girl being gagged, I spanked her a few times with my shiny new whip, and then i let her do the rest. She wen't from not knowing what an orgasm was, to having one on her own in about 15 minutes. while I know that's probably not what you want, it may be what you need?
:D
 
The simplified version of this post

in the mood to masturbate = masturbate

Not in the mood to masturbate = don't masturbate

According to the posts this is the simple answer.

Here is a simplified version what I was originally saying.

In the mood to masturbate+masturbate=does feel good

Not in the mood to masturbate+masturbate=does not feel good

The question was

Not in the mood to masturbate+X+masturbate=does feel good

Solve for X?

Hint: X does not = masturbate
 
Simplified response

yillbs said:
Have you ever thought the reason you can't experience anything is because you're not looking at what you want properly? Maybe you're watching porn with a man and a woman having sex. Maybe you should be watching a fantasy rape scene? Just a thought, but it sounds like you need to explore a darker lifestyle that what it sounds like you need. Prepping before a masturbation experience is perfectly fine, but the problem is you need to already be ready for it. Think of masturbation as just a way to relieve what's built up from earlier. My sub, Sarah, was the same way. She wasn't a virgin, but she had been very vanilla, didn't know how to play with herself, wasn't sure what it should feel like, etc. Nothing worked until a little pain was introduced. We watched a humiliation scene of a girl being gagged, I spanked her a few times with my shiny new whip, and then i let her do the rest. She wen't from not knowing what an orgasm was, to having one on her own in about 15 minutes. while I know that's probably not what you want, it may be what you need?
:D
Click to expand...

ggg+in the mood to masturbate+masturbate=actually does feel good

ggg+not in the mood to masturbate=does not feel good
 
greengamegirl said:
Never mind, most of the posters don't know the difference between advice for getting in the mood to masturbate and masturbation advice. I was asking for the former, not the latter. Alternatively most people tried to turn this post into something else. I should have just called it getting in the mood but that probably would have still confused everyone.

People can continue to post for their own entertainment but I'm done with this thread.
Click to expand...

I think you are trying to figure out how to increase your libido. So that you are in the mood more often. Libido drives desire. Desire/mood drives masturbation. I am very sexual and masturbate one to two times per day. And you are incorrect in assuming it has to do with my erection. It has everything to do with my mood and desire level. Which is controled by my thoughts and chemistry. I suggest you focus on sex more. Think about it alot. If ideas are sexy to you think about them dwell on them. Look at hot guys in public, check out couples and imagine them masturbating for each other. Read hot stories here. Most of the peeps here are not going to understand because most of us are already heavily focused on sex. You seem smart, you can easily understand that you have to think about sex to get in the mood. When i say think about sex it can be as sime as thinking about how good it is going to feel when you get home and get undressed and make love to yourself.
 
BiTodd said:
I think you are trying to figure out how to increase your libido. So that you are in the mood more often. Libido drives desire. Desire/mood drives masturbation. I am very sexual and masturbate one to two times per day. And you are incorrect in assuming it has to do with my erection. It has everything to do with my mood and desire level. Which is controled by my thoughts and chemistry. I suggest you focus on sex more. Think about it alot. If ideas are sexy to you think about them dwell on them. Look at hot guys in public, check out couples and imagine them masturbating for each other. Read hot stories here. Most of the peeps here are not going to understand because most of us are already heavily focused on sex. You seem smart, you can easily understand that you have to think about sex to get in the mood. When i say think about sex it can be as sime as thinking about how good it is going to feel when you get home and get undressed and make love to yourself.
Click to expand...

I said:

ggg+in the mood to masturbate+masturbate=actually does feel good

ggg+not in the mood to masturbate=does not feel good

ggg+not in the mood to masturbate+X=does feel good

You said:

X = think about sex
X = increase my libido
X = think about how good it will feel to masturbate

My answer:

Not in the mood+think about sex=still not in the mood
Not in the mood+increase my libido=does feel good
Not in the mood+think about how good it will feel to masturbate=not in the mood

Alternatively:

In the mood+think about sex=does feel good
In the mood+increase my libido=does feel good
In the mood+think about how good it will feel to masturbate=does feel good

*hint: If I'm in the mood, all of your suggestions work because they are for masturbation. This isn't about masturbation.
 
greengamegirl said:
ggg+in the mood to masturbate+masturbate=actually does feel good

ggg+not in the mood to masturbate=does not feel good
Click to expand...

What you don't seem to understand is that no one can get you in the mood or tell you how to get in the mood. Triggers are different for each and every person. So when you aren't in the mood and you try to masturbate you don't get the satisfaction you are wanting because at that point you are trying to force something your body isn't wanting.

People here have given you many different triggers that work for them, but you seem to not be hearing them very well.

Good luck, you will need it!
 
Let's review

BreezySnow said:
What you don't seem to understand is that no one can get you in the mood or tell you how to get in the mood. Triggers are different for each and every person. So when you aren't in the mood and you try to masturbate you don't get the satisfaction you are wanting because at that point you are trying to force something your body isn't wanting.

People here have given you many different triggers that work for them, but you seem to not be hearing them very well.

Good luck, you will need it!
Click to expand...

Not in the mood to masturbate+X+masturbate=does feel good

So far posters think X is:
1. watch porn
2. read erotica
3. use candles
4. listen to music
5. drink alcohol
6. do some other drugs
7. don't do anything because why bother
8. masturbate
9. wait until I am already in the mood
10. go to a doctor because obviously something is medically wrong
11. don't feel guilty about sex
12. things do when I am already in the mood that won't work if I'm not in the mood
13. think about sex

My answer:
1-13 only works if I'm already in the mood.

What next?
Trial and error (obviously)
 
BreezySnow said:
What you don't seem to understand is that no one can get you in the mood or tell you how to get in the mood. Triggers are different for each and every person. So when you aren't in the mood and you try to masturbate you don't get the satisfaction you are wanting because at that point you are trying to force something your body isn't wanting.

People here have given you many different triggers that work for them, but you seem to not be hearing them very well.

Good luck, you will need it!
Click to expand...

Actually it is like this:

1. someone says try X+I haven't tried X+I try X= I will say if X worked

2. someone says try X+I have already tried X= I say X does not work

3. someone says try something that would work if I was in the mood or already masturbating

*2 and 3 usually happens
 
COYS4414 said:
Is it possible to force yourself to be in the mood for something? I understand your question and have given it thought and really can't think of anything?

Maybe browse lit and talk to people until something starts to turn you on?
Click to expand...

Apparently people think:

In the mood to masturbate=masturbate
Not in the mood to masturbate=don't masturbate

I asked:
Not in the mood to masturbate+X=in the mood to masturbate

But X doesn't seem to exist.
 
greengamegirl said:
I said:

ggg+in the mood to masturbate+masturbate=actually does feel good

ggg+not in the mood to masturbate=does not feel good

ggg+not in the mood to masturbate+X=does feel good

You said:

X = think about sex
X = increase my libido
X = think about how good it will feel to masturbate

My answer:

Not in the mood+think about sex=still not in the mood
Not in the mood+increase my libido=does feel good
Not in the mood+think about how good it will feel to masturbate=not in the mood

Alternatively:

In the mood+think about sex=does feel good
In the mood+increase my libido=does feel good
In the mood+think about how good it will feel to masturbate=does feel good

*hint: If I'm in the mood, all of your suggestions work because they are for masturbation. This isn't about masturbation.
Click to expand...

So sorry, i have concluded that your situation is unique to you based on your limited understanding of logic.
 
greengamegirl said:
Apparently people think:

In the mood to masturbate=masturbate
Not in the mood to masturbate=don't masturbate

I asked:
Not in the mood to masturbate+X=in the mood to masturbate

But X doesn't seem to exist.
Click to expand...

Not in the mood + browse lit/naughty PMs = in the mood
 
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