Things you NEVER want to hear while having sex

I lost a bet. The deal was either I fuck you or blow an elephant and I don't have enough money to go to the zoo.
 
“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided for you. Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, do you wish to speak to me?”
 
"Can I cover your face with a bag? It's just killing my you know.... Dang it grandma I just can't get hard with you looking at me with that dang judgmental look you got."
 
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