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Hummmm. Actually a good point. I did a quick copy & paste on my way out the door this morning. I did not pay attention to the formatting.
Thank you for the feedback.
I am distracted by the mix of pronouns throughout. Try to be consistent so the reader is not confused trying to figure out who is talking and thinking.
There is also an inconsistent use of quotation marks. Either use them or don't. But figure out how to indicate the speaker or the thinker. This helps propel the story and keeps the reader from trying to sort it out for themselves.
Good luck.
Just FYI, you're not allowed to post stories on the forum.
Says who?
Says who?
It's generally covered under Forum Guideline #11 which says that all content should be posted in the most appropriate place.
It's generally covered under Forum Guideline #11 which says that all content should be posted in the most appropriate place.
No, because for rule #11 the content is only moved, not deleted.
If this is a rule, then rule #2 is fairly stupid:
You may not post sexually explicit stories featuring anyone under 18 years old.
If I may not post stories anyway, why not just write that?
ETA: It's back there on #10. Must've been a glitch I saw.
Yes, you can actually get the webserver to glitch. Just hit Refresh multiple times on the forum rules page and with 3-4 or attempts you will get a different version.