Who is controlling who?

Sometimes I like to dip into the mind control stories. My favorite ones are ones where there are multiple controllers or anyone can get a hold of the device or technique in question. What I'd like to se more of though are stories where the one in control is secretly being controlled by someone else.

For example: Guy calls his friends over saying he finally completed his mind control device and wants to show it to them. They come over, thinking he's full of crap when his step/sister strolls out in her underwear and slinks down the stairs. She then gets told to strip and serve them. Guys are ecstatic and beg him for the secret. Guy points to a device he's wearing and has sis grab the others he made and has her hand them to each one. Guys start thinking of all the girls they will get to have power over when sis clears her throats and tells them to be silent.

She then reveals that they are holding conditioning devices which make them utterly under the control of one person: her. Far from the bimbo they thought she was she actually completed her brother's design and perfected it while inverting the purpose: accepting commands as opposed to broadcasting. Brother is under her control and has been for some time. She then tells them they have the job of spreading the devices to other people in town.

The problem i see is creating some adversity with a story like that. Because let's face it if everything went perfectly in a mind control story it would be kind of boring. Take one of my favorite examples called "The nude gun" i think its called. Thats one of the mind control stories i think works.

Well the above example would only really work as a oneshot.

A longer story would require some sort of plot. Maybe a secret society of psychics is working to keep their presence unknown when suddenly a huge explosion of mind control incidents start happening in the public eye. The psychics have resistance so they start investigating, only to have their numbers get taken over.

They catch the rogue psychic only to discover he's far too weak to have done most of the acts he's accused of.

So it becomes a matter of trying to unravel who is in charge and finding out who is behind everything (the two might not be the same).


For villain obstacles it could be that they have to stay in close proximity to have full control over their proxies and can only give them general instructions that they have to obey when they aren't under control.

I like the idea quite a bit. But I don't think the story needs that many characters.

Tweak: Nerd has finally finished his mind controlling machine, so he puts on the device and decides to test it on his unsuspecting assistant (yeah, really not into incest). He orders her to strip, which she does; he orders her to do [mild sex act], which she also does. Nerd is ecstatic. They go on to do [more intense sex act] and [even more intense sex act], it gets more and more extreme. At one point, nerd starts wondering why they are doing [kind of extreme sex act], because he can't remember ever having been into that. Turns out that the assistant had completed and reversed the devide, and nerd has in fact been controlled all along and used as her sex toy. Nerd is helpless and can't stop the train of events now, [sexy climax here.] Afterwards, assistant is satisfied with the results, and orders the nerd to go and distribute copies of the device amongst the local football team.

That could work too.

Had one (no incest this time): real psychic goes to hypnotist show. When hypnotist whispers to her, she whispers back to make the commands raunchy. Crowd thinks hypnotist is doing it while she's manipulating them like a puppet.

For MC to interesting, the controller must pay a price. Every use of the MC technology or magic drains something from the user: soul, lifespan, intelligence, whatever. TANSTAAFL.

In the above schema, nerd builds MC machine; sister or assistant reverses the device, controlling nerd but also empowering him -- her essence drains into him while she uses him. If devices are passed around town we'll see ever-energized guys stridently pounding their ever-weaker (but happy) 'controllers'. The logical inevitable ending is almost necrophiliac.

Breakout: one gal realizes what the device is doing to her, and discovers how to strengthen herself... by having her toy-boy use it on her, draining his essence into her. Does she share her discovery?

Sounds great, i love the hypnotist idea, I'd love to steal that but i won't!

JayG88 said:

Sounds great, i love the hypnotist idea, I'd love to steal that but i won't!

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