Bistro Bijou

Coles notes after briefly perusing this thread................

• Tight pussies abound.
• Homburg is a fisting liability
• Bijou is eyeing LeBroz's leg.
• Double pumper isn't nearly as dirty as it sounds
• Homburg uses metaphors 'n shit
• Ange's daughter likes Johnny Depp

WickedEve said:

Wow. I didn't know they cost that much.
By the way, who are you?
I know you're new around here. Poet?

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Poet? Me? Nah. I'm just some perv that likes to tie people up. bijou dragged me over here because she's trying to... Hmm, I have no idea what she's trying to do.

I think I am to be the floor show on odd nights. That might be it.

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Angeline said:

He keeps saying "no," but I read his poems and he's using metaphors and stuff.

Anyway, you know us. We grind them all up and throw them into the poetry machine. Hmmm, maybe I don't mean it quite that way. I just had a long conversation with my daughter about Sweeny Todd.

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That movie was so beautifully evil. I simply HAD to do knifeplay afterwards. My gal got assaulted many times in the week or so after screening that film, knife in hand and me humming the tune to "Pretty women".

So very tasty.

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Tristesse2 said:

Coles notes after briefly perusing this thread................

• Tight pussies abound.
• Homburg is a fisting liability
• Bijou is eyeing LeBroz's leg.
• Double pumper isn't nearly as dirty as it sounds
• Homburg uses metaphors 'n shit
• Ange's daughter likes Johnny Depp

Click to expand...

I don't personally fist (my hands have proven too large thus far). I simply encourage, enable, and direct the activity for my viewing pleasure.

Tristesse2 said:

Coles notes after briefly perusing this thread................

• Tight pussies abound.
• Homburg is a fisting liability
• Bijou is eyeing LeBroz's leg.
• Double pumper isn't nearly as dirty as it sounds
• Homburg uses metaphors 'n shit
• Ange's daughter likes Johnny Depp

Click to expand...

Correctamundo and her liking him preceded Sweeny Todd. I was telling her about when the play was on Broadway with Len Cariou and Angela Lansbury and which theater it was in and blah blah, well until she started saying "Yeah Mom, uh-huh" over and over, which means "Shut up and listen to me talk about Johnny Depp again."

OMG where do I start? I've just found out why Eve is wicked!! Yeah right well I do have an itsy vagina the other half reckons it's like feckin' a virgin and has the bruised dong many a time to prove it. Homb you can keep your fists to yourself more than 2 fingers is hard to accomodate not that a teensy bit of pain is a bad thing! I prefer my grenadine in a tequila sunrise, The cake thing? well like it's my birthday today so guys do you wanna make my day? A threesome I've tried but a moresome never! We could make the 'screaming orgasm' not necessarily a drink. I know LeBroz has thing about blondes and this blonde is collar n cuffs!

UnderYourSpell said:

The cake thing? well like it's my birthday today so guys do you wanna make my day? A threesome I've tried but a moresome never! We could make the 'screaming orgasm' not necessarily a drink. I know LeBroz has thing about blondes and this blonde is collar n cuffs!

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Ah yes, the right little blonde would be my undoing as she'd spend her life wrapping me around her little pinkie!

Did somebody say something about a b-day threesome? Let's see what I can cook up for our little sweetie!

.
.

UnderYourSpell said:

OMG where do I start? I've just found out why Eve is wicked!! Yeah right well I do have an itsy vagina the other half reckons it's like feckin' a virgin and has the bruised dong many a time to prove it. Homb you can keep your fists to yourself more than 2 fingers is hard to accomodate not that a teensy bit of pain is a bad thing!

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Oh, stop. Stop! You are bragging about it! Okay, fine. Mine is so tiny that my boyfriend prefers the comfort of my nostril.
And I saw your Bday thread. So, you know... Happy you know what.

Soooooo I've got the right to brag not many ladies of my age can say its still as tight as when they were 16 and first did it! Thankyou for the happy wotsits by the way lol only just found the thread myself and am blown away by it thankyou Broz xxx am now awaiting instructions on how to wear HER out having never been down that road before!

oy it's been busy in "real life" today! Don't these people know I have an imaginary life to tend to?

Tristesse2 said:

Coles notes after briefly perusing this thread................

• Tight pussies abound.
• Homburg is a fisting liability
• Bijou is eyeing LeBroz's leg.
• Double pumper isn't nearly as dirty as it sounds
• Homburg uses metaphors 'n shit
• Ange's daughter likes Johnny Depp

Click to expand...

Yup. *nods, nods* that about covers it.

Homburg said:

Poet? Me? Nah. I'm just some perv that likes to tie people up. bijou dragged me over here because she's trying to... Hmm, I have no idea what she's trying to do.

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Once the Cock is syndicated, you'll be a celebrity and that will make the Bistro look good.

That's all. It's not personal or anything.

*didja hear, kids? The Cock is about to get his own monthly column, as it were.*

Angeline said:

Correctamundo and her liking him preceded Sweeny Todd. I was telling her about when the play was on Broadway with Len Cariou and Angela Lansbury and which theater it was in and blah blah, well until she started saying "Yeah Mom, uh-huh" over and over, which means "Shut up and listen to me talk about Johnny Depp again."

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Okay this means it's about time for the next Bistro Challenge. We are about to create a true meme, if we do this right. Watch this space for more info soon.

WickedEve said:

Oh, stop. Stop! You are bragging about it! Okay, fine. Mine is so tiny that my boyfriend prefers the comfort of my nostril.
And I saw your Bday thread. So, you know... Happy you know what.

Click to expand...

Meme 2:
I'm so tight...
Local jewelers sharpen their diamond-cutting tools on me.

continue...

UnderYourSpell said:

Soooooo I've got the right to brag not many ladies of my age can say its still as tight as when they were 16 and first did it! Thankyou for the happy wotsits by the way lol only just found the thread myself and am blown away by it thankyou Broz xxx am now awaiting instructions on how to wear HER out having never been down that road before!

Click to expand...

If I have my way, LeBroz' life would look like this
Look! They're all blonde, even!

UYS Here's a nice topical cake for you. I liked that it's actually pierced...

happy earth day, sweetie.
bj

unpredictablebijou said:

Once the Cock is syndicated, you'll be a celebrity and that will make the Bistro look good.

That's all. It's not personal or anything.

*didja hear, kids? The Cock is about to get his own monthly column, as it were.*

Click to expand...

Two, actually. Just a little online quarterly thing. Nothing huge, though a print version will be avilable once there's enough reason to print it (translation: advertisers )

I do believe that Nala plans to include erotic poetry in the journal. Just a thought.

If I have my way, LeBroz' life would look like this
Look! They're all blonde, even!

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I would take a slice of that cake.

unpredictablebijou said:

If I have my way, LeBroz' life would look like this
Look! They're all blonde, even!

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Just look at all them munchies. And they're all low calorie too!
I'll never come to an end with this bountiful display.

.
.

Exactly. No more birthdays until this cake is finished .

Homburg said:

Two, actually. Just a little online quarterly thing. Nothing huge, though a print version will be avilable once there's enough reason to print it (translation: advertisers )

I do believe that Nala plans to include erotic poetry in the journal. Just a thought.



I would take a slice of that cake.

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Interesting. Well, I hear there are some people around here who do that...

So your Cock needs a corporate sponsor?

oh the possibilities that come to mind. I just don't even know where to start. The endless, endless punchlines...

Perhaps that's Meme 3.

LeBroz said:

Just look at all them munchies. And they're all low calorie too!
I'll never come to an end with this bountiful display.

.
.

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Sweetie, did you finally find your link?

champagne1982 said:

Exactly. No more birthdays until this cake is finished .

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I will totally help with that.

Totally.

bj

I did a rather silly thing and fully expect to be yelled at ...... I took two strong painkillers (prescription strength) then I got indigestion so I took a Cemetedine and I dont know if they dont go very well together or what .... but they knocked me out! Mind you I had the best sleep I have had in a long time but I was too woozy to get ready to go out lol

unpredictablebijou said:

Interesting. Well, I hear there are some people around here who do that...

Click to expand...

Could be just why I mentioned it.

So your Cock needs a corporate sponsor?

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My Cock's Needs are few, but His Wants are many.

oh the possibilities that come to mind. I just don't even know where to start. The endless, endless punchlines...

Perhaps that's Meme 3.

bj

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Which is probably 85% of the reason I do what I do there

UnderYourSpell said:

I did a rather silly thing and fully expect to be yelled at ...... I took two strong painkillers (prescription strength) then I got indigestion so I took a Cemetedine and I dont know if they dont go very well together or what .... but they knocked me out! Mind you I had the best sleep I have had in a long time but I was too woozy to get ready to go out lol

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Did you have a particular preference as to who would be yelling at you and in what manner? We do aim to please, especially since it's your birthday and all.

I'll start. Lemme see:

Young lady, that will be quite enough of that sort of behavior. Accidentally mixing prescriptions is simply no way to celebrate your birthday. Who do you think you are, Hunter S. Thompson? Now settle down and get shit-faced drunk like a normal human being.

right then.

how was that?

Homburg said:

Which is probably 85% of the reason I do what I do there

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Never underestimate the value of a good punchline. God gives dozens of extra points for making him laugh.

bj

unpredictablebijou said:

Did you have a particular preference as to who would be yelling at you and in what manner? We do aim to please, especially since it's your birthday and all.

I'll start. Lemme see:

Young lady, that will be quite enough of that sort of behavior. Accidentally mixing prescriptions is simply no way to celebrate your birthday. Who do you think you are, Hunter S. Thompson? Now settle down and get shit-faced drunk like a normal human being.

right then.

how was that?




Never underestimate the value of a good punchline. God gives dozens of extra points for making him laugh.

bj

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It's pretty obvious to me that no matter what else one thinks about God, he/she has a great sense of humor.

Angeline said:

It's pretty obvious to me that no matter what else one thinks about God, he/she has a great sense of humor.

Click to expand...

And he obviously smokes weed. I mean c'mon: possums.

bj

unpredictablebijou said:

And he obviously smokes weed. I mean c'mon: possums.

bj

Click to expand...

eagleyez and I are watching the primary election coverage with the biggest smiles on our faces. Huge voter turnouts, loads of young people voting, people standing in lines waiting to get into polling places. I tell you it does this old radical's heart good. Something's happening out there. The times, they are a-changing.

Angeline said:

eagleyez and I are watching the primary election coverage with the biggest smiles on our faces. Huge voter turnouts, loads of young people voting, people standing in lines waiting to get into polling places. I tell you it does this old radical's heart good. Something's happening out there. The times, they are a-changing.

Click to expand...

Here where I am, they had to move the venue from the small concert hall in town to the local fairgrounds because the crowd was suddenly getting so big.

and in a little college bar a couple of weeks ago, i heard the best campaign slogan invented since "I like Ike":

Obama. For your Mama.

go kids go!

bj

unpredictablebijou said:

Here where I am, they had to move the venue from the small concert hall in town to the local fairgrounds because the crowd was suddenly getting so big.

and in a little college bar a couple of weeks ago, i heard the best campaign slogan invented since "I like Ike":

Obama. For your Mama.

go kids go!

bj

Click to expand...

Hmmmm.

Obama
drama
pajamas
llama
Osama
Bahamas
comma
trauma

The drama of Obama:
me in my pajamas
worried about Osama,
sick of fucking traumas,
playing with the commas,
dreaming of a meadow
where a llama turns to me,
says "Welcome to Bahamas."

Bistro Mini Challenge:

Take a candidate's name, come up with all the rhymes you can and write a poem.

Angeline said:

Hmmmm.

Obama
drama
pajamas
llama
Osama
Bahamas
comma
trauma

The drama of Obama:
me in my pajamas
worried about Osama,
sick of fucking traumas,
playing with the commas,
dreaming of a meadow
where a llama turns to me,
says "Welcome to Bahamas."

Bistro Mini Challenge:

Take a candidate's name, come up with all the rhymes you can and write a poem.

Click to expand...

You rawk! an Excellent challenge.

I read your poem to a friend who just returned from the local raucous caucus. He liked it much. He lol'ed, even.

hm... pillory... distillery...

I'm off for tonight. dinner calls.

Tomorrow: the meme.

bj

Well, there's some baaad weather in Kansas. I hope all is well.

Random Link

In the beginning

there was nothing

the big darkness

the long darkness

the separation of Rangi and Papa

formed man/people

formation of young warriors

formation of young chiefs

if you aim for the mountains

you will hit the plains

if you aim for the sky

you will hit the mountain peaks

climb up, thrive

to the pathway of knowledge

to achieve excellence

spiritually, mentally, physically

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Warrior poetry.

We got a BUNCHA snow last night. It's gorgeous out today, now that the sun is out. Messy, but gorgeous.

Here's the beginning of the meme. I hope it will go far.


Top Johnny Depp Facts:
(originals generated in some very interesting chick-parties at My Bar.)

1. Johnny Depp is so hot the Sun gets Depp-burns.

2. Every single one of Johnny Depp's sperm is wearing a tuxedo.

3. Girls don't go through puberty. Johnny Depp thinks of them and they instantly blossom into women.

4. Johnny Depp's gaze has caused 85-year old-women to conceive.

5. Johnny Depp is so hot, God has to go to a therapist for self-esteem problems.

6. Johnny Depp turned wearing filth into a style.

7. The only person hot enough to have sex with Johnny Depp is Johnny Depp.

8. Johnny Depp can turn being a barber into a sexy profession.

9. Johnny Depp is so hot he can make Jerry Bruckheimer look like a good director.

10. Johnny Depp is so hot you can light a cigarette off his ass, but you don't have to smoke around Johnny Depp because he is the answer to all addictions.

11. Johnny Depp is perfect but he cannot go to Heaven because all of the chaste angels would fall from grace.

12. Out of respect, Johnny Depp keeps at least 10 miles away from all convents. Otherwise nuns would not be able to keep their vows.

13. The Great Plains were once an inland ocean but Johnny Depp gave it a long, steamy gaze and all the water boiled away.

14. The Fountain of Youth has finally been found. It is Johnny Depp's cock.

15. If Johnny Depp had been there instead of the serpent, Eve would have eaten the entire tree.

16. Johnny Depp's gaze has the power to compel anyone to do anything. But he has never had to use it; he just asks nicely and gets the same result.

17. Women rip off their clothes whenever they get close to Johnny Depp, but they never get cold because his Hotness creates tropical conditions within a 100-mile radius.

so.

your contributions?

bj

Homburg said:

Random Link



Warrior poetry.

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Perhaps the opposing teams have all translations of the Haka................


English Translation:
It is death! It is death!
It is life! It is life!
This is the hairy person
Who caused the sun to shine
Keep abreast! Keep abreast
The rank! Hold fast!
Into the sun that shines!


.....not quite as intimidating.