You know you're having a bad day when...

[wishfulthinking]

You're tutoring class and you tell one kid that they are a lazy shit and tell another that if they put glue in my hair I will chop their fingers off.



Edited to add: and yes, a kid squirted glitter fabric paint in my eye and it still stings.

Adorable buggers!

 

[magicalmouse]

I've always wondered why teachers aren't issued with battle shields, flack jackets and goggles. Sorry to hear ya had such a bad day. There's one kid in my youngest son's class that makes his teachers life a nightmare... i love kids but this one is a little barsteward, every time i see him i expect his head to rotate 180 degrees, i'm quite sure he won't disappoint me either.

 

[bg23]

"Small children are good to eat."
- Anonymous.

No, I'm not Hannibal Lector in disguise...

 

[cantdog]

I went back, uncredentialed this time, to substitute teaching. I did the real thing once, but I was so callow I blush at myself now.

Subs get no respect, particularly at the middle school level. They are a resource in that they are there to abuse and dehumanize. It makes reaching the kids a little bit difficult, even though I have a lot more on the ball, in my opinion, now than back when I held a teaching certificate.

My best day was with the second graders. We all saluted the flag together, and they helped me to understand what the unit was for, that the teacher I was working for was working on. There was one appalling sociopathic child, though. But the second graders, on the whole, responded as warmly to me as I did to them. I was humbled and delighted all at once. The middle school is another bag altogether.

Your occasional glimpses from the trenches remind me of the subbing in the seventh grade. You ought to be knighted or canonized or something.

Stay focused and kindly do not bite their little fingers off. There's a special place in paradise that I'm sure someone will screw up your pass to, but it is reserved for you.

cantdog

 

[Guest]

"All children should be put in a barrel at bith and be fed through the bunghole. At the age of 18 make the decision to take them out of the barrel, or drive in the bung." - Woodrow Wilson Long

 

[SlickTony]

Subs get no respect, particularly at the middle school level.

That's what turned me off teaching, middle school students. I decided I'd rather have a job hosing down walls in a slaughterhouse. Dead pigs don't talk back.

 

[Bizkit_Writer]

The story I am trying to write isn't going in the right direction!

 

[psychocatblah]

In the past couple of months several people have told me that I'd make a great teacher. Reading this sort of thing is why I know I wouldn't. My mother is a teacher and I get to hear about all of the insanity she has to deal with, and to be honest, the kids sound like the least of it.

Maybe it's just the school district that she's in, but I can't imagine I'd last very long in doing any of it. Not the paperwork, not the bs with the administration, and most certainly not with the kids.

On the upside, I was generally rather nice to my teachers. Although admittedly I took advantage of more than my fair share of substitutes. But generally just for passes to the library that would free me up to do what I wanted. Sadly, I was such a nerd, what I wanted to do was usually to actually go to the library and read. *snorts*

 

[Belegon]

Sadly, I was such a nerd, what I wanted to do was usually to actually go to the library and read. *snorts*

Nothing wrong with that...one of the reasons I so enjoyed my brief foray into professional athletics was because all that time on the bus I could read. Though I must admit, most teammates could not understand the lack of pictures.

 

[psychocatblah]

Nothing wrong with that...one of the reasons I so enjoyed my brief foray into professional athletics was because all that time on the bus I could read. Though I must admit, most teammates could not understand the lack of pictures.

What did you play?

I loved nipping away to read or sneaking off to play music.

Maybe you should've brought them some books with pictures in to settle them down a bit.

 

[wishfulthinking]

The story I am trying to write isn't going in the right direction!

I hate it when the characters start telling you what they want to do, rather than the other way around

BTW - I'm not a teacher, saintly creatures that they are, but simply a crafts tutor on the weekend for an australian craft chain store. I love it, more than my serious job, I just wasn't in the mood for the buggers. I only have myself to blame though, because it is usually me who is covering them with paint

 

[Belegon]

What did you play?

I loved nipping away to read or sneaking off to play music.

Maybe you should've brought them some books with pictures in to settle them down a bit.

Was lucky enough to play baseball as a job for a couple of summers.

Watch Bull Durham, they get as much stuff right as they get wrong. Not a criticism, usually they get way more wrong then right. I was older than most of them, like Crash.

I wish I could say I was lucky enough to ever meet a Millie or Annie, but I was not.

 

[psychocatblah]

Was lucky enough to play baseball as a job for a couple of summers.

Watch Bull Durham, they get as much stuff right as they get wrong. Not a criticism, usually they get way more wrong then right. I was older than most of them, like Crash.

I wish I could say I was lucky enough to ever meet a Millie or Annie, but I was not.

Ahh, I never saw that movie. It had sports AND romance. I'm more of a hardcore horror or action sort of girl.

Still, if you love the game it's a great job. I rather liked baseball, just not really enough to play it. Well, it would be softball for me anyways. I did play a bit of basketball and volleyball, but in the end I'm just not very competitive and got bored with it. I lasted in Tennis for much longer, but since I've been out of school I haven't really had anyone to play.

I never got much into watching sports, though. But I plead girl on that.

 

[Randi Grail]

Dead pigs don't talk back.

Hopefully.
T
ry herding 40 ten year olds through the London subway system during rush hour. You'll start thinking in terms of acceptable losses.

 

[SlickTony]

Try herding 40 ten year olds through the London subway system during rush hour. You'll start thinking in terms of acceptable losses.

No, thanks. I know what my limitations are.

 

[kinky shy girl]

Ahh, I never saw that movie. It had sports AND romance. I'm more of a hardcore horror or action sort of girl.

Oh, you're missing out. I don't like baseball movies, but I really enjoyed that one.

 

[psychocatblah]

Oh, you're missing out. I don't like baseball movies, but I really enjoyed that one.

I'm sure there will be some mixture of bored afternoon and nothing else on and I'll think, "I'm a fool!" But until then... I'm hiding from it!

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

...you wake up.

...you're awakened at 7:50 am by your idiotic neigbor using a weedeater after sleeping only 4 hours.

...the neighbor is making such a racket that when the garbage men run you can barely hear them.

...two of your (adult) cats get into a fight over which of them gets to sleep on your head.

...your husband, who works nights and usually comes home surly, takes one look at the expression on your face and immediately says "whatever it is, I didn't do it!"

Thank the gods for coffee.

 

[SlickTony]

...minutes before you're supposed to go out somewhere, it starts raining so heavily you can hear it dinning on the gutters and the chimney liner, and your umbrella's in the car.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

The story I am trying to write isn't going in the right direction!...

My last three stories went in precisely the right direction.

STRAIGHT into the incinerator!

 

[Guest]

You wake up face down in the gutter.