"You Could Be Having Sex Right Now!"

[Strangebuddy]

So, when I'm perusing porn online and Adblock fails to stop a banner from loading, I often see the above statement flashing. It got me thinking, what if there was a website or app where all you had to do was just log in and press a button stating you want sex, what acts you want to experience, and how many partners? After entering this info you will have a willing partner or partners in your room.

So a couple possibilities, feel free to share your own:

1. My obligatory post about demons. Like a porn parody of a shin megami tenseI game, the app or website is actually summoning demons to carry out your wishes...but they want to get paid. Our lead summoned a demon who settled for devouring compost afterwards but now he has a reverse gang-bang with several sultry succubii and as he's about to climax, they start to thank him for his soul.

2. The app taps whoever is in a near proximity to you and you have 10 minutes at most before the act starts. Use it on a subway for a blowjob? Well, that homeless guy and you are about to get acquainted. Use it in a hospital? Well, you could end up with a sexy nurse or doctor...or you could wind up with a bombshell who has MRSA.

And yes, this would mean taboo situations could occur...or tentacles, banana slugs, unicorns, whatever if they're around.

The other twist is that once you accept the terms of service, your body will crave your partner during the act, regardless of what you might want.

 

[Hypoxia]

A non-demonic scenario could work in (sub)urban settings. But what about out here in my mountainous rural boonie-toons? Delivery drones might be needed to haul the fucker(s) to the remote target address. Where's the Android app for that?

Yes, we could have a range of possible sources behind the service.

* Demons -- pay to have your soul slowly devoured.
* Aliens --conducting research on human mating patterns.
* Gov't agency -- they have some dire nefarious plot in mind.
* Corporation -- profiting with money and blackmailable information.
* Innocent geek -- she only developed the enterprise for fun.
* Incompetent geek -- he built it for breeding ferrets.
* Alien geek -- it's its version of a gloryhole.

Back to the urban setting. A guy is stuck in commute traffic. He sees the billboard: "You Could Be Having Sex Right Now!" and the 1-888 number and app name. He signals the service. Minutes later, his passenger door opens. A BJ is administered. The blower exits. Traffic breaks up. He's only a few minutes late to work.

 

[CeasarBoobage]

Lying in bed, with the remnants of the dream still remaining in his mind, Toby starts groping at the woman sleeping next to him. She smacks his hand away and he gets up to use the bathroom, feeling like he just got the best BJ of his life.

He remembers pressing that special button on the porn website while his lady was hanging out with her sister in the other room, then the web page switched to his facebook account, and out through the screen comes the sister of his GF/wife. Completely oblivious as to how her body is being used, the sister fulfills his every need, then her FB account goes back to 'offline' status. Toby isn't sure how he connected his dream to his deepest secret crush, but he goes along happily with his dream.

Several minutes later, Toby is confused and turned on, so he gets out of bed to see the sister in the kitchen washing her hands and gargling mouthwash. She sees him and blushes, saying she has to get back to her own bed where her husband is waiting. Stopping to give Toby a hug, she holds his hand against her bra-less breast through her thin pajama top, then kisses him on the cheek before she leaves with a giggle.

As she walks away, Toby goes back to bed, promising himself he will stop drinking. While he takes the sister's slippers from beside the bed to put them by the front door, he is no longer sure his dream was as imagined, but he can't bring himself to mention it to anyone. No one would believe or understand his confusion.

 

[scsinclair]

I like the idea of a more "real world" version of this - the app already comes with a built-in GPS tracking function (using the GPS in your phone or device), and the moment you click on it, your request is processed and someone from the local branch of the service is dispatched to your location to fulfill it. Rather than magic, demons, aliens, etc., it's the sexual equivalent of Uber.

The fantasy aspect of it comes primarily from the fact that the app always gets your request absolutely perfect. For example, a guy gets all hot and bothered looking at pics of Playmate & model Sarah Jean Underwood, and decides he needs some female companionship. Though the app only allows him to specify hair color, ethnicity, age range, and body type in his request, it can also access his browser history and determine his more specific tastes. After the request goes in, the app searches and sees that the guy was looking at Sarah's Instagram right before he placed his order, that he follows her on Twitter, Facebook, etc., and that he's searched her name 111 times in the last year. Extrapolating from this, the app searches its own database of available ladies and finds one that looks in many ways very much like SJU. So instead of just some random blonde showing up at his door fifteen minutes later, the girl at the door looks very, very much like the one he wanted to fuck in the first place.

This could be taken to extremes. Say the guy is watching a classic porn film on a tube site with a scene with Taija Rae, Ginger Lynn, and Crystal Breeze all taking on one lucky guy. Instead of beating off, he hits the app. And just by virtue of its advanced technology and seeming endless supply of available employees, the app sends three girls who not only look very much like those legendary porn queens, but are even dressed in '80s fashions, with their hair and make-up done up in that style.

The app is specifically designed so that you don't know just how close what you'll get is to what you wanted in the first place, so the surprise will enhance the excitement of your encounter. Want to bang Jennifer Lopez? The girl who shows up is her doppelganger, bubble butt and all. Want a threesome with your ex-girlfriend and the two identical sisters you always wished she had? Here come three girls who you'd swear were them! Fantasizing about that cheerleader in high school you were too shy to ever talk to? Surprise! Her "twin"is at your door,

 

[Carnevil9]

I don't see any reason why this app couldn't work for real. You create an account, load a photo of yourself, list your kinks. When you are in the mood for a tryst, you push the "do me now" button and see who gets suggested. Or you see who is online and available nearby. One of you sends the other a "Fuck Request," which the other is free to accept or reject. Of course, the first thing you would do is check their feedback, just like on eBay. If they have 99% positive reviews, you go for it. You hook up, do the dead, and leave feedback for each other.

Totally plausible, and totally ripe with story possibilities.