writing in 3rd person

[stlthecuriousone]

I have so many stories ready to post but I never realized that I tend to write in 1st person. The other pages suggest that you dont do that but what is the trick to stop doing so? Im not sure I know how to write in third person where it doesnt sound wierd.

any tips or suggestions?

 

[driphoney]

I have so many stories ready to post but I never realized that I tend to write in 1st person. The other pages suggest that you dont do that but what is the trick to stop doing so? Im not sure I know how to write in third person where it doesnt sound wierd.

any tips or suggestions?

Post a short sample of it, and we'll convert it for you. Just a couple paragraphs and a couple lines of dialogue. We're all secret editors-wannabes!

 

[stlthecuriousone]

very rough but you get the point

Its about midnight and you are sitting in your office, the door is locked and I know your feeling very lonely and bored.

Smiling as I stand in front of the door. I remove a hair pin and "click" unlock it. Quietly I open the door, closing and lock it behind myself. You must be dozing because you didn't take notice to my entrance. Walking towards you, I stand across the desk from you. I untie my coat and underneath is a short low cut red button up number. I start tapping my nails on your desk and you stir looking up at me kind of confused.

 

[soflabbwlvr]

Post a short sample of it, and we'll convert it for you. Just a couple paragraphs and a couple lines of dialogue. We're all secret editors-wannabes!

Did you just "out" all of us?

 

[Boxlicker101]

Its about midnight and you are sitting in your office, the door is locked and I know your feeling very lonely and bored.

Smiling as I stand in front of the door. I remove a hair pin and "click" unlock it. Quietly I open the door, closing and lock it behind myself. You must be dozing because you didn't take notice to my entrance. Walking towards you, I stand across the desk from you. I untie my coat and underneath is a short low cut red button up number. I start tapping my nails on your desk and you stir looking up at me kind of confused.

This is second person, present tense. If you prefer that, that is your outlook, but I would never do it. Besides that, I bolded the errors in these two short paragraphs.

 

[Handley_Page]

It's at this point all my memories of learning English at school leave me.
Colour me completely baffled.

 

[stlthecuriousone]

It was quickly written from

The top of my head so I hadn't really paid close attention to the details.

The question was what are your suggestion to put it into 3rd person.

 

[soflabbwlvr]

The top of my head so I hadn't really paid close attention to the details.

The question was what are your suggestion to put it into 3rd person.

Describe the action as though you were watching and listening to it happen between other people, instead of between you and your lover. Create characters, and then tell their story to your audience. Give the characters names, and then use them.

 

[driphoney]

Did you just "out" all of us?

 

[driphoney]

The top of my head so I hadn't really paid close attention to the details.

The question was what are your suggestion to put it into 3rd person.

You just wrote that off the top of your head?

Why don't you post some of your real story?

 

[driphoney]

Its about midnight and you are sitting in your office, the door is locked and I know your feeling very lonely and bored.

Smiling as I stand in front of the door. I remove a hair pin and "click" unlock it. Quietly I open the door, closing and lock it behind myself. You must be dozing because you didn't take notice to my entrance. Walking towards you, I stand across the desk from you. I untie my coat and underneath is a short low cut red button up number. I start tapping my nails on your desk and you stir looking up at me kind of confused.

It's about midnight, and she sees him sitting in his office. The door is locked [how does she see him?], but [somehow] she knows he's feeling very lonely and bored.

Smiling, she stands in front of the door and removes a hair pin and unlocks it. Moving quietly, she closes and locks the door behind her. Is you dozing, she asks herself, because he fails to notice her entrance ....


Anyway ... get the picture?

 

[stlthecuriousone]

yes thank you!

That's what I thought but wanted to make sure before I took the time and did it wrong.

I didn't post a "finished story". Because I'm still nervous about posting them in the first place . Only a select few have ever read them and I know they like them but I'm not sure what the rest of the world will. I want to perfect them before exposing myself to the critics. That's all!

 

[Boxlicker101]

Its about midnight and you are sitting in your office, the door is locked and I know your feeling very lonely and bored.

Smiling as I stand in front of the door. I remove a hair pin and "click" unlock it. Quietly I open the door, closing and lock it behind myself. You must be dozing because you didn't take notice to my entrance. Walking towards you, I stand across the desk from you. I untie my coat and underneath is a short low cut red button up number. I start tapping my nails on your desk and you stir looking up at me kind of confused.

It was almost midnight, and Robert was sitting in his office with the door locked. Rita approached, knowing how he would be feeling lonely and bored.

Smiling, she stood in front of the door and removed a hairpin. With a soft "click" she picked the lock, quietly opening the door and locking it behind herself. She realized Robert must have been dozing, because he didn't notice her entrance. Still being quiet, she approached the desk and stood across from him while untying her coat, exosing a short, low-cut button-up number. She started tapping her nails, and he stirred, looking up at her in confusion.

In third person, you use pronouns as I have, or names, or designations such as "her ex-husband" or "the tall redhead" or whatever else is appropriate.

There is nothing wrong with writing in first person, and the majority of my stories are written like that. However, I would avoid writing in second person, as you have done, especially in the present tense.

 

[stlthecuriousone]

perfectly explained!

Thank you very much. I have a tendency to write in first person (I, you, etc) but most of the stories I have read here do not so I wanted to make sure I did it correctly. . I find first person very effective and personally like it better that way but I know that others don't care for it. Switching from first to third will actually be the hardest part of writing them.

 

[driphoney]

It was almost midnight, and Robert was sitting in his office with the door locked. Rita approached, knowing how he would be feeling lonely and bored.

Smiling, she stood in front of the door and removed a hairpin. With a soft "click" she picked the lock, quietly opening the door and locking it behind herself. She realized Robert must have been dozing, because he didn't notice her entrance. Still being quiet, she approached the desk and stood across from him while untying her coat, exosing a short, low-cut button-up number. She started tapping her nails, and he stirred, looking up at her in confusion.

In third person, you use pronouns as I have, or names, or designations such as "her ex-husband" or "the tall redhead" or whatever else is appropriate.

There is nothing wrong with writing in first person, and the majority of my stories are written like that. However, I would avoid writing in second person, as you have done, especially in the present tense.

Had to show me up, did you?





(But I, least of all, am anti-second person.)

 

[Boxlicker101]

Had to show me up, did you?





(But I, least of all, am anti-second person.)

Hi, Honey. People sometimes complain about the lack of character development or plot in most of my stories, but I am mechanically sound.

 

[driphoney]

Hi, Honey. People sometimes complain about the lack of character development or plot in most of my stories, but I am mechanically sound.

Are you kidding? I'm from Texas (well now anyway) so I don't even know what plot is!

 

[glynndah]

Who says you can't write in first person?

 

[driphoney]

Who says you can't write in first person?

Not me! That's for sure. But I do find it a struggle to write, and when it's not done well, even more of a struggle to read.

But that's just me.

 

[bronzeage]

I have so many stories ready to post but I never realized that I tend to write in 1st person. The other pages suggest that you dont do that but what is the trick to stop doing so? Im not sure I know how to write in third person where it doesnt sound wierd.

any tips or suggestions?

We find it easy to write in first person because we think in first person. It is the most natural voice.

It is limiting when writing a story, especially when there are multiple characters.

The advantage of third person is the flexibility. The storyline can be told by someone in the sky, watching the action. This person can know the past and future, if it suits the story. The point of view can shift from one character to another, letting the reader in on secrets which create anticipation and suspense.

Don't worry about sounding weird until it's written.

 

[WRJames]

The poster is scratching his chin -- stubbly from a days growth of beard. Sometimes he writes in third person, but his latest novel, the screamed confessions of a witch bound in her cell, waiting for execution, is written in first person. Actually, some of his favorite novels, Memoires d;Hadrein and I Claudius are written in first person.

Still, there are advantages to third person omniscient, particularly for a longer work. And of course, each character can narrate their own first person experience, within the third person context.

 

[_Lynn_]

We find it easy to write in first person because we think in first person. It is the most natural voice.

It is limiting when writing a story, especially when there are multiple characters.

The advantage of third person is the flexibility. The storyline can be told by someone in the sky, watching the action. This person can know the past and future, if it suits the story. The point of view can shift from one character to another, letting the reader in on secrets which create anticipation and suspense.

Don't worry about sounding weird until it's written.

'We'(I) do not find it easy to write in first person. I'm sure some of my earlier crap was in first, but I don't find it natural at all.

writing in 3rd person
I have so many stories ready to post but I never realized that I tend to write in 1st person. The other pages suggest that you dont do that but what is the trick to stop doing so? Im not sure I know how to write in third person where it doesnt sound wierd.

any tips or suggestions?

Write whichever way you prefer. First is fine. So is third. As long as you have a good plot, use proper grammar and correct punctuation, etc., it is your choice which to write in.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

I have many stories written in the first person...I don't know how well they are written but I assume by the vote score they must be doing something for the reader. I have also written many in the third person. I have also written in the first person, shifting POV among the characters.

I do however find myself, when I start a new work, beginning with first person and then somewhere around the ten paragraph deciding that it should be told in the third person.

Sure am glad I'm not doing this stuff on an old fashion typewriter!

 

[KillerMuffin]

Thank you very much. I have a tendency to write in first person (I, you, etc) but most of the stories I have read here do not so I wanted to make sure I did it correctly. . I find first person very effective and personally like it better that way but I know that others don't care for it. Switching from first to third will actually be the hardest part of writing them.

Honey, you are NOT writing in first person. First person is an effective, wonderful story-telling point of view that includes all pronouns in the narrative except the pronoun you.

First person plural includes the pronoun we (and conjugations). It encompasses the I character and, depending on the tone of the narrative, either the reader, the general you, or other characters.

You are writing in second person. Second person includes the pronoun you in the narrative, as well as I. It's the worst point of view to use unless you have a very specific reason for it (the story is a letter, the theme demands it, you plan on sharing it only with the "you" that you're writing to). Second person has a tendency to alienate readership quickly. You, the writer, cannot predict what the reader is like or how the reader will react to any given stimulous, so dictating to them in your story engenders bad feelings. How would you react to a story that prominently describes you getting off, multi-orgasmically, on the taste of water?

Third person has all of the pronouns in the narrative except I, we, and you.

Narrative is the parts outside of quotation marks, that is, not dialogue. POV is not changed by anything inside the dialogue.

How do you switch? Think about your audience before you write and while you write. Who, specifically are you writing for? A "you" generally comes with a single person you're envisioning, a lover or a fantasy lover. Wipe the lover out of your head and reconfigure the audience. Make it a large room full of people in various shapes, sizes, and genders. People that include fantasy lovers and people that you would not have sex with (though you might find them attractive enough to be in the porn with your fantasy lover). This puts what we call narrative distance in your brain between you and the reader. It allows you to shift from second person to first person. Tell this room full of attractive non-lovers what you and your fantasy lover do. There is nothing wrong with first person at all. It's an excellent POV.

Second person has a false intimacy in it. It gives the writer an impression of closeness with the reader, that the writer is very intimate with the reader because the reader is very, very close in the writer's imagination while he or she writes. This is a false intimacy because the reader does not generally feel it. The reader must fall within a tiny range of very specific physical and psychological characteristics in order to meet that intimacy. How many people do that? Very, very few. That's why the intimacy is a false one. You feel it when you write, imagining a closeness with your reader. The reader does not feel it when he or she reads because he or she is not the you that participated in the creation of the fantasy and does not match that character. Instead of feeling an intimate closeness, the reader feels pushed away. Some disagree with this, but most people find second person distasteful. Troll the site for second person stories, they're out there, and read them for yourself. Find out how much you like them. Better yet, here's a few from erotic couplings, one written by a male to a female and one written by a female to a male:
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=388081
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=256606

 

[Boxlicker101]

Muffie! Where have you been for the last decade or so?