Words that should be porn words

[shereads]

He stroked her silken nebula with the throbbing tip of his credenza.

 

[neonlyte]

He stroked her silken nebula with the throbbing tip of his credenza.

and watched syllabub seep twixt crenelated fissure

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Florence King wrote a ton of porn books between 1966 and 1972. She said she tried using Latin in one of the books.

http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9B0DE4DA133DF930A35756C0A961948260

 

[shereads]

Beauregard's lexus grew hard at the sight of Pamela's naked flan.

 

[pellso27]

cumquat

 

[TE999]

Cedric slowly circumnavigated Penlope's aching meridian, his throbbing sextant entering her wet astrolabe.

 

[fieryjen]

Cedric slowly circumnavigated Penlope's aching meridian, his throbbing sextant entering her wet astrolabe.

Love it!

 

[shereads]

Cedric slowly circumnavigated Penlope's aching meridian, his throbbing sextant entering her wet astrolabe.

"Fool," she snapped. "That isn't my astrolabe. It's my barouche!"

 

[TE999]

"Fool," she snapped. "That isn't my astrolabe. It's my barouche!"

"I thought we agreed to experiment," he replied, projecting his mercator into her axis.

 

[shereads]

"I thought we agreed to experiment," he replied, projecting his mercator into her axis.

Which is how Lord Sedgewick found them when he entered the room. "Penelope," he cried, "you shameless gig! Do you want the servants to see your curricle?"

 

[TE999]

Which is how Lord Sedgewick found them when he entered the room. "Penelope," he cried, "you shameless gig! Do you want the servants to see your curricle?"

"An ablation on the servants," Penelope retorted. "Cedric and I will convolvulus wherever we choose." She stormed out of the room, her hand defiantly on Cedric's pentacles.

 

[shereads]

"An ablation on the servants," Penelope retorted. "Cedric and I will convolvulus wherever we choose." She stormed out of the room, her hand defiantly on Cedric's pentacles.

Cedric paled. "Where are you going with those? They are borrowed, you know."

"It serves you right," said Sedgewick. "Only an idiot would let Penelope get her hands on his pentacles. You're lucky you still have your hassock and cameroons."

 

[neonlyte]

"Hush child, don't weep."

"But his noggin, Mama... it's scarcely big enough to mark a furrow."

"Is that what saddens you child of my voluptuous oyster. Remember the old proverb, A ploughman's noggin is only as good as his ability to turn the furrow before planting the seed"

"I told him that at breakfast. We were talking about horticulture... the season is right. I thought I might slip it in while he worked the horses"

"And what did he answer my slippery pearl?"

"He said, 'You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think.'

"I think you need to change the battery of your babblefish."

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

"Amanda, I know this is a bit kinky, but I want to watch you masticate."

Rumple Foreskin

DIRTY WORD
by Bod Dylan

(The Traveling Wilburys)

He love your sexy body, he loves your dirty mind
He loves when you hold him, grab him from behind
Oh baby, you're such a pretty thing
I can't wait to introduce you to the other members of my gang

You don't need no wax job, you're smooth enough for me
If you need you oil changed I'll do it for you free
Oh baby, the pleasure would be all mine
If you let me drive your pickup truck and park it where the sun don't shine

Every time he touches you his ass stands up on end
His legs begin to quiver and his mind begins to bend
Oh baby, you're such a tasty treat
But I'm under doctor's orders, I'm afraid to overeat

He love your sense of humor, your disposition too
There's absolutely nothing that he don't love about you
Oh baby, I'm on my hands and knees
Life would be so simple if I only had you to please

Oh baby, turn around and say goodbye
You go to the airport now and I'm going home to cry

He loves your...

Electric dumplings
Red bell peppers
Fuel injection
Service charge
Five-speed gearbox
Long endurance
Quest for junk food
Big refrigerator
Trembling Wilbury
Marble earrings
Porky curtains
Power steering
Bottled water
Parts and services

Dirty world, a dirty world, it's a ...ing dirty world

 

[Oblimo]

"I found this in your sock drawer." The dipthong dangled from her fingers. "Care to explain how it got there, young man?"

 

[jomar]

She yearned for Todd to caress her swollen uvula then violate her anemone with his prodigious capstan.

 

[shereads]

fuselage:

"Herbert's fuselage was showing."

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

She had a hot pulsing Volvo

 

[tickledkitty]

The sight of her tippled nuptuals and glistening mangrove inspired Mike to stroke his dangling participle.

 

[Lisa Denton]

She had a hot pulsing Volvo

He crashed into it with his lil economy sized compact Kia, her hot pulsing Volvo spurted out juices which ignited, basting them in an inferno of road passion.

But he really wanted her sister Mercedes, he died impotent and out of gas, for true love was not to be. His Deville withered as he took his last breath.

 

[jomar]

Girard stroked Wilhemina's silken vizla with the throbbing tip of his tanqueray.

 

[Guest]

"Hush child, don't weep."

"But his noggin, Mama... it's scarcely big enough to mark a furrow."

"Is that what saddens you child of my voluptuous oyster. Remember the old proverb, A ploughman's noggin is only as good as his ability to turn the furrow before planting the seed"

"I told him that at breakfast. We were talking about horticulture... the season is right. I thought I might slip it in while he worked the horses"

"And what did he answer my slippery pearl?"

"He said, 'You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think.'

"I think you need to change the battery of your babblefish."

Okay my sides hurt this is funny...

 

[Mark_Ilaan]

Struck by the beauty of her femoral sheath, his inguinal ligament ached as it grew behind his zephyr. He wanted to plunder her vascular pulse, and abductor hiatus. Just when he thought he could bear no more, she opened her popliteal fossa, welcoming him into the folds of her femoral triangle.

Jesus, I’ve been around too many medical people and locked up with my sister’s bodice rippers for too long. Someone get me out of here!

 

[TE999]

Cedric paled. "Where are you going with those? They are borrowed, you know."

"It serves you right," said Sedgewick. "Only an idiot would let Penelope get her hands on his pentacles. You're lucky you still have your hassock and cameroons."

Penelope strode down the hallway where she encountered Lady Sedgewick.

"I see you have Cedric's pentacles," she said admiringly.

"I tired of his constant preturbation so I removed them," Penelope replied. "He can find another way to confabulate and he doesn't need me."

"Care to see my new dilatory then?"

"Only if we can both organza with it," Penelope replied with a grin.

 

[fieryjen]

You should get this past 750 words and submit it. Seriously. I'm in stitches.