Women Want Good Boyfriends, Not Just Any Boyfriends

[JackLuis]

I found this and wondered if I'm out of the loop?

If you think about it for a millisecond, the possibility that these girls have a bunch of guys lining up at their doors, offering egalitarian and loving relationships full of tenderness and respect—and that they’re saying “nah” and moving on—is completely implausible. Indeed, Brown says later:

And what they are crushingly disappointed about is in the era of electronic media…girls really are just summoned to get oral sex, they come over, they’re supposed to like it – they hate it! The fact of the matter is, sex with young men is usually a fumbling disastrous experience. I mean, lets face it: boys are lousy at sex.

The gist of the article is that women want a man who wants them, for more than five minutes at a time. It seems that girls now are just as picky as they were 40 years ago, but more open about it.

I guess I have always been weird, I've never thought hanging with buds, preferable to hanging with a woman. Of course in my day games were as pitiful as "Pong".

 

[lovecraft68]

Crap.

This means the wife's just using me until a good one comes along.

 

[robertreams]

I have been a high school teacher for a long time. I find the premis of teh article to be untrue. (or perhaps it is an age thing) I had many students who preferred to have any man, even an abusive one, to not having any man.

Older women - -20-30 might have this attitude but een older 50-70 are extremely picky and want what they want. Personally i prefer a woman who knows what she wants, its less effort on start up.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Why does anyone give a fuck what the gals want?

They want money, schlong, security, and a fool to work their games on.

What do they have to offer? Pussy.

 

[damppanties]

They want money, schlong, security, and a fool to work their games on.

If by security, you mean commitment, I suppose the problem is that no one really has all four qualities at the same time.


About boys being clueless about oral sex... well, yes. And so are a lot of girls. The majority of young people are really self-involved nowadays and don't much care about the partner other than going about the motions mostly.

 

[lovecraft68]

I suppose the problem is that no one really has all four qualities at the same time.

True, sadly I have no money

 

[damppanties]

True, sadly I have no money

The wife's just using you until someone rich comes along.

 

[RoyceConnors]

I don't see where the complaint is? They get what they picked, so shut the fuck up, that's who they are and who the fuck are you to want them to change? Pick somebody else and leave the poor guy alone. You want attention, talk to some mothers with 35 yr. old sons still at home. They'd be happy to set you up with them.

 

[lovecraft68]

The wife's just using you until someone rich comes along.

Yup, but she says then when she finds her sugar daddy, she'll cheat on him with me.


I get to be the pool boy!

 

[damppanties]

I don't see where the complaint is? They get what they picked, so shut the fuck up, that's who they are and who the fuck are you to want them to change? Pick somebody else and leave the poor guy alone. You want attention, talk to some mothers with 35 yr. old sons still at home. They'd be happy to set you up with them.

Are you ranting at me?

 

[RoyceConnors]

Are you ranting at me?

No darlin', not at you personally. Just those women who complain about the guy they're with. He was like that when they met him, so be happy they aren't alone with ten cats.

 

[lovecraft68]

No darlin', not at you personally. Just those women who complain about the guy they're with. He was like that when they met him, so be happy they aren't alone with ten cats.

Many women see the faults and for some reason think they can change them.

 

[damppanties]

No darlin', not at you personally. Just those women who complain about the guy they're with. He was like that when they met him, so be happy they aren't alone with ten cats.

Not at me personally but women in general then?

That's a very misogynistic statement. Males and females both want their partners to be better. I could argue that men complain about wanting their women to be slim and in shape or whatnot. Wanting better than what you have is a human trait. Not exclusive to women at all.

 

[RoyceConnors]

Not at me personally but women in general then?

That's a very misogynistic statement. Males and females both want their partners to be better. I could argue that men complain about wanting their women to be slim and in shape or whatnot. Wanting better than what you have is a human trait. Not exclusive to women at all.

I guess you have to spend some time on the receiving end of things to know what guys are talking about. I loved my woman when she was slim and loved her just the same when she was twenty pounds heavier, wrinkles that no amount of cream would hide, too. Asked me to change who I am to suit her, see ya. I am who I am, take me or leave me, but don't try to change me.

 

[damppanties]

I guess you have to spend some time on the receiving end of things to know what guys are talking about. I loved my woman when she was slim and loved her just the same when she was twenty pounds heavier, wrinkles that no amount of cream would hide, too. Asked me to change who I am to suit her, see ya. I am who I am, take me or leave me, but don't try to change me.

I understand what you're saying but you use one personal experience to make a general statement. My point is that men and women alike have high expectations from their partners and are bored / complain when those expectations aren't met. Or want more once they have something.

 

[RoyceConnors]

I understand what you're saying but you use one personal experience to make a general statement. My point is that men and women alike have high expectations from their partners and are bored / complain when those expectations aren't met. Or want more once they have something.

And that's why relationships are as throw-away as everything else these days. People don't come with apps and upgrades, we come with who we are and a desire to be educated better today, than we were yesterday.

Pretty packaging means nothing, when it's nothing but shit inside. People have to accept imperfections, in others and in themselves.

 

[3113]

And that's why relationships are as throw-away as everything else these days.

Oh, fucking YAWN! Yeah, things were SOOOO much better in the days when men and women couldn't throw away relationships, when they married for life....And if you'd been married to that woman who wanted to change you, but you couldn't say "see ya!," you'd be so much happier than now when you can say "see ya" and leave?

I mean, really. Here you are talking about "see ya" and that girls who should leave guys they want to change, and yet YOU are complaining that today's relationships are too "throw-away"? You can't have it both way, dude.

Seriously. Sounds to me like you're advocating throw-away even as you complain about it. And to top it all off, you don't seem to realize that relationships now are the same as back when, with some people happy and willing to work at the relationship, and most unhappy and unwilling to make it work. The only difference is that the unhappy now get to leave. And that's good, as they set free guys like you who don't want to be stuck with a partner who will do nothing but complain and try to change you.

 

[HeyAll]

Where's the link to the article?

I'd be interested to read it.

 

[RoyceConnors]

Oh, fucking YAWN! Yeah, things were SOOOO much better in the days when men and women couldn't throw away relationships, when they married for life....And if you'd been married to that woman who wanted to change you, but you couldn't say "see ya!," you'd be so much happier than now when you can say "see ya" and leave?

I mean, really. Here you are talking about "see ya" and that girls who should leave guys they want to change, and yet YOU are complaining that today's relationships are too "throw-away"? You can't have it both way, dude.

Seriously. Sounds to me like you're advocating throw-away even as you complain about it. And to top it all off, you don't seem to realize that relationships now are the same as back when, with some people happy and willing to work at the relationship, and most unhappy and unwilling to make it work. The only difference is that the unhappy now get to leave. And that's good, as they set free guys like you who don't want to be stuck with a partner who will do nothing but complain and try to change you.

All I said was people should be happy with who they decide to be with and not try to change them. I'm all for working on a relationship, but not to change who someone is, so the other person feels better about it.

 

[slyc_willie]

<rant>

Even given that there's no link provided to the original article, I don't think it would matter for the context of the basic gist of the matter. It's yet another diatribe about "what women want," which could just as easily be "what men want."

Why is there this assumed dichotomy between men and women? Why the ridiculous notion of the "battle of the sexes?" When the hell did that start, anyway? During the sixties?

Sure, there are differences between men and women. Well, duh. But when it comes down to it, all human beings want the same thing: security, companionship, dependability, and sex. Love is an external ingredient thrown in to make the relationship better. It's great if you can find that, or develop it, but it's not something we automatically look for.

I hate all this "men are from Mars, women are from Venus" crap. We aren't two alien species living together. We come from the same damn place. We all want the same things, we just go about it differently. The key is to be mature, honest, open about yourself, and willing to take criticism. Forget what Cosmo or Maxim tells you about the opposite sex, and have the guts to be honest with your partner.

</end rant>

 

[TxRad]

<rant>

Even given that there's no link provided to the original article, I don't think it would matter for the context of the basic gist of the matter. It's yet another diatribe about "what women want," which could just as easily be "what men want."

Why is there this assumed dichotomy between men and women? Why the ridiculous notion of the "battle of the sexes?" When the hell did that start, anyway? During the sixties?

Sure, there are differences between men and women. Well, duh. But when it comes down to it, all human beings want the same thing: security, companionship, dependability, and sex. Love is an external ingredient thrown in to make the relationship better. It's great if you can find that, or develop it, but it's not something we automatically look for.

I hate all this "men are from Mars, women are from Venus" crap. We aren't two alien species living together. We come from the same damn place. We all want the same things, we just go about it differently. The key is to be mature, honest, open about yourself, and willing to take criticism. Forget what Cosmo or Maxim tells you about the opposite sex, and have the guts to be honest with your partner.

</end rant>

Quit talking common sense, you'll scare these people.

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence
But you still have to mow it and you'd better do a damned good job
Or you'll be out on the other side of the fence again.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

<rant>

Even given that there's no link provided to the original article, I don't think it would matter for the context of the basic gist of the matter. It's yet another diatribe about "what women want," which could just as easily be "what men want."

Why is there this assumed dichotomy between men and women? Why the ridiculous notion of the "battle of the sexes?" When the hell did that start, anyway? During the sixties?

Sure, there are differences between men and women. Well, duh. But when it comes down to it, all human beings want the same thing: security, companionship, dependability, and sex. Love is an external ingredient thrown in to make the relationship better. It's great if you can find that, or develop it, but it's not something we automatically look for.

I hate all this "men are from Mars, women are from Venus" crap. We aren't two alien species living together. We come from the same damn place. We all want the same things, we just go about it differently. The key is to be mature, honest, open about yourself, and willing to take criticism. Forget what Cosmo or Maxim tells you about the opposite sex, and have the guts to be honest with your partner.

</end rant>

It aint crap, dear. There really is a Santa Claus. But the problem aint tween males and females, the problem is tween females and females. If your woman suddenly hates you its cuz her friend or sister is got somthin a wee bit better, and it works on her mind like a toothache.

And youre wrong about love, too. Its a process NOT a thing or event.

 

[StrangeLife]

Why does anyone give a fuck what the gals want?

They want money, schlong, security, and a fool to work their games on.

What do they have to offer? Pussy.

Depending on the quality of the merchandise that's not always a bad deal...

 

[JackLuis]

Where's the link to the article?

I'd be interested to read it.

I missed the link in my OP.
Here

I thought it would draw some interest (fire?) but screwed up. Sorry.

 

[slyc_willie]

Quit talking common sense, you'll scare these people.

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence
But you still have to mow it and you'd better do a damned good job
Or you'll be out on the other side of the fence again.

Yeah, I know. It just gets me that people are looking for answers in articles and magazines when they're already right there in front of us.

It aint crap, dear. There really is a Santa Claus. But the problem aint tween males and females, the problem is tween females and females. If your woman suddenly hates you its cuz her friend or sister is got somthin a wee bit better, and it works on her mind like a toothache.

And youre wrong about love, too. Its a process NOT a thing or event.

You scrape the edge of an occasional truth there, Jimmy. Don't forget it works both ways. Either way, though, it's a cop-out excuse for not having taken the time to invest time and effort in the relationship you have.

And I contend that love is an event. It's a sudden, blossoming thing that pops up when you least expect it. To say it's a process is to liken it to tending a garden and watching it grow. You can adore the garden and be especially fond of it, but love is that sudden weed that blossoms into the most beautiful flower overnight.

Okay, enough fancy-shmancy romantics. I need to get back to writing.