Women: Best way to bring up anal sex?

[chatwithme]

This is for Literotica Women?

I have a mistress that I really want to have anal sex with. When we first made love, there was a point where i was kissing near her ass, and she did not feel comfortable about it. When i asked later about her reaction, she said "I'm a midwest girl and never done anything too wild."

I want to carefully introduce the concept, but am unsure what is the best way to bring a woman along to the idea? For those literotica women who have made the transition (and love anal) what is the best approach to take?

 

[dragonhearted]

This is for Literotica Women?

I have a mistress that I really want to have anal sex with. When we first made love, there was a point where i was kissing near her ass, and she did not feel comfortable about it. When i asked later about her reaction, she said "I'm a midwest girl and never done anything too wild."

I want to carefully introduce the concept, but am unsure what is the best way to bring a woman along to the idea? For those literotica women who have made the transition (and love anal) what is the best approach to take?

are you crazy? or are you just blind? if she is not completely comfortable with it, pushing the issue would be unwise. What you could do is when eating her out, lick her anus....if she is clean you could try to tongue fuck her gently...let her get accustomed to the sensation. If she does not like that, do NOT pursue anal intercourse with her.

 

[randy1]

Give her the book..

What's it called, ''Anal Sex for Women'' I believe... Then wait for her to bring it up. Even for those comfortable w/anal, male or female, I'd recommend it. It's very informative and funny too!

hth,

randy

 

[nightnurse]

mmmmm anal sex is scary for women but if you take your time and introduce the subject to her and tell her how much it turns you on she may allow you to try it with her


id also read up on how to do it with out makeing her uncomfortable..........

but if she really is nt keen on the idea .....leave it .......some people are nt into it.................

 

[chatwithme]

Thanks for the advise...let me clarify though- -i have not pushed her. I really think from our other love making that she will open her eyes to the possibilities beyond missonary sex.

What I hope is to gradually bring her along, but being a guy well, we don't see things the way women do. I was hoping that there is a Lit. Woman who was in the same situation, made the transition to the wild side, and can tell me what worked for her.

 

[brinkeedinkee]

Thanks for the advise...let me clarify though- -i have not pushed her. I really think from our other love making that she will open her eyes to the possibilities beyond missonary sex.

What I hope is to gradually bring her along, but being a guy well, we don't see things the way women do. I was hoping that there is a Lit. Woman who was in the same situation, made the transition to the wild side, and can tell me what worked for her.

Hi chat...
I guess u could say I've "gone to the other side" heehee...and I truly love it...although it's still very uncomfortable at first, each and every time, STILL, the orgasms involved are the BEST for ME! But, I'll be honest, my hubby pushed and pushed until I didn't want to even be INTERESTED in it. I was the one to choose to do it when we finally did...all the way. We played for a long time. And he made it clear, it doesn't matter if we do or not. Even though he was nice about it eventually, I still felt like if I couldn't do it, I was not giving him the pleasure HE wanted. That's an awful feeling.
All I can say is...SLOW SLOW SLOW...and if she says no, then DON'T don't don't.
At least you are being honest and seeking some advice. Alot of men would just push it until the woman was so frustrated she coudn't do it if she WANTED to. So bravo for asking!

 

[randy1]

...some people aren't into it...

Actually, I'm sorry to disagree. I've found every partner has come around to loving it. It is more sensitive and intense... Ironically, one partner who had prior negative experiences (bordering on abuse) came around to requesting it more than any other sexual activity (it helps that the physiological results are better than a whole body massage).

Also, after anal penetration (just like evacuation) the heart rate lowers and the resulting relaxation is wonderful.

Those that tend to initially indicate unwillingness usually have false impressions. When they learn of other women's positive experiences, being the social creatures they are, they might want to explore.

That's the reason I mentioned that book. After giving it to a new lover, I received a wonderful email describing her first self-pleasuring experience with full penetration and an expression of appreciation.

Sure, ymmv, but the beauty of giving the book makes it a gift from you to her rather than a request or demand from you!

I guess I'm saying, rather than trying to convince her to do it, instead make it such that she'll come asking for it.

(Reading the book yourself will give you fabulous insight into women's minds on this subject too--exactly why this thread was started...)

Enjoy,

randy

 

[brinkeedinkee]

Actually, I'm sorry to disagree. I've found every partner has come around to loving it. It is more sensitive and intense... Ironically, one partner who had prior negative experiences (bordering on abuse) came around to requesting it more than any other sexual activity (it helps that the physiological results are better than a whole body massage).

Also, after anal penetration (just like evacuation) the heart rate lowers and the resulting relaxation is wonderful.

Those that tend to initially indicate unwillingness usually have false impressions. When they learn of other women's positive experiences, being the social creatures they are, they might want to explore.

That's the reason I mentioned that book. After giving it to a new lover, I received a wonderful email describing her first self-pleasuring experience with full penetration and an expression of appreciation.

Sure, ymmv, but the beauty of giving the book makes it a gift from you to her rather than a request or demand from you!

I guess I'm saying, rather than trying to convince her to do it, instead make it such that she'll come asking for it.

(Reading the book yourself will give you fabulous insight into women's minds on this subject too--exactly why this thread was started...)

Enjoy,

randy

well said randy

 

[daisey69]

thank you

I had read this thread earlier and had thougth about giving a reply, but then chickened out, however randy has given me courage so here it goes.

Long ago before it was ever done to me, I was very fearful of the IDEA of it....after all they portray it to be horrific when it happens on tv shows ( jail rapes etc.) I was ?fortunate? enough to have a boyfriend at the time who just put extra saliva on the tip of his cock and he pushed it in. It was so f-ing intense I still get wet thinking about it, ok it wasn't 'great' the first time.....you have to get used to the sensations you are feeling. however, it is one of my favorites now.

Try getting a shower with her get her nice and bubbly down there are tease with a finger TIP. Also I recommend anal beads..they truly open up more possibilites. slowly insert them in her then fuck her, when she is cumming pull one out at a time slowly, she will learn to love the sensation and crave for "bigger' things to be placed in there Just my opinion.

However if she is truly turned off by this then don't persue it, it will lead to resentment on both sides. Hope I helped some.

 

[dragonhearted]

Re: thank you

Long ago before it was ever done to me, I was very fearful of the IDEA of it.... I was ?fortunate? enough to have a boyfriend at the time who just put extra saliva on the tip of his cock and he pushed it in. It was so f-ing intense I still get wet thinking about it, ok it wasn't 'great' the first time.....you have to get used to the sensations you are feeling. however, it is one of my favorites now.
Try getting a shower with her get her nice and bubbly down there are tease with a finger TIP. Also I recommend anal beads..they truly open up more possibilites. slowly insert them in her then fuck her, when she is cumming pull one out at a time slowly, she will learn to love the sensation and crave for "bigger' things to be placed in there Just my opinion.

My first anal experience with the now EX boyfriend, he tied my wrists. He lubed my ass well with KY, and used a small dildo to stretch me out. He did this for a long time, even used vibration to relax me. Anal beads are good, esp. if the man fucks you, cuz the sensation of them and him together make for a very intense orgasm. Yeow! I will say though, unless I am well stretched and lubed everytime, anal is painful for me, to start with.

 

[chatwithme]

Like a lot of things, i was lucky as a younger man. I sprang it on my gitlfriend after long and intense lovemaking. She had already orgasmed by my oral efforts and regular vaginal sex. I had gotten her wet with my mouth, and then thrust in. I can still hear her screaming "OH MY GOD" which was both thrilling and scary at the time. She later told me that it was like the "other side" of her clit was being massaged....she ended up loving it, and we usually made love in that way after she had orgasmed via other means.

But i also think that i was just lucky...i really want to open my lover's eyes...i know she will love it if i can just show her the way. Please keep your pointers coming, and thanks for posting Daisy...you never should hold back!

 

[linnae]

Take your time

I recommend talking to her. Find out what her fears are. If she allows it, slowly introduce her to it. I love it when a guy has his fingers in my pussy and slowly works his way down to my ass. My natural lubrication and his gentle touch, soon has me begging for "deeper exploration". Talk her through it and assure her that when she has had enough, you'll stop.

I also agree, get the book and read it!

 

[Lady Emerald]

Its been a while but what really worked for me was when he was massaging my clit and putting his fingers in my cunt that he gradually slipped a well lubed (really well lubed) finger in my butt--it is a deep and shocking pleasure. Gradually as I felt that pleasure I offered my butt a little more and a little more until I was craving it. Plenty of lubrication, plenty of stimulation, and let her do the same to you (!). Also the first time we really did it I was on top so I could control the penetration, take it as slowly as I needed. For the woman it is important to feel you can call stop if its getting painful--and trust is a big issue, she needs to feel totally confident that if she says stop you will. Good luck.

This is for Literotica Women?

I have a mistress that I really want to have anal sex with. When we first made love, there was a point where i was kissing near her ass, and she did not feel comfortable about it. When i asked later about her reaction, she said "I'm a midwest girl and never done anything too wild."

I want to carefully introduce the concept, but am unsure what is the best way to bring a woman along to the idea? For those literotica women who have made the transition (and love anal) what is the best approach to take?

 

[MusBPh8]

I'm a novice in this area myself. Have done it one time, did like it, but I think I'll like it more next time. There were moments that it was really fantastic and moments it was really painful. But I think knowing what to expect next time I'll be more relaxed, use more lube, and will spend more time on the fantastic parts.

My boyfriend was very reluctant to tell me that he had fantasies about that. In fact had made a few derrogatory comments about it probably in order to gauge my reaction. But ultimatley he did admit to wanting to try it. So I read about it, got a video, a toy... It did take some adjusting to the idea I have to say. It isn't something most women just naturally want to try. But many women, once they try it, will want to do it again.

If your girlfriend doesn't leap at the idea right away maybe you can ease her in with some porn, a toy, some finger play, some dirty talk, some erotica, some how-to guides... Not all at once or in a pressuring way. Just as you think you can 'slip it in.'

 

[chatwithme]

Wow...does lit work?

Last night as we were making love, i was orally satisfying Denise, and low and behold...i used my lubircated finger to press her puckered back side and she orgasmed with so much intensity....i told her how much i had wanted to introduce this into our lovemaking....she smiled and said she would on one condition....that i must be willing to allow her to introduce her own idea...

then she took me in her mouth, and used a small, somewhat curved vibrator around my balls and pressed the tip inside me right when i orgasmed...i spurted everywhere and A LOT....she says that she wants to dress special on Halloween, and that I can have her cherry that night- - if i am a good boy....

In the meantime, she wants to prepare,......maybe she has been reading this book everyone mentions?

Nervouse, but already horny!

 

[chatwithme]

Wow...does lit work?

Last night as we were making love, i was orally satisfying Denise, and low and behold...i used my lubircated finger to press her puckered back side and she orgasmed with so much intensity....i told her how much i had wanted to introduce this into our lovemaking....she smiled and said she would on one condition....that i must be willing to allow her to introduce her own idea...

then she took me in her mouth, and used a small, somewhat curved vibrator around my balls and pressed the tip inside me right when i orgasmed...i spurted everywhere and A LOT....she says that she wants to dress special on Halloween, and that I can have her cherry that night- - if i am a good boy....

In the meantime, she wants to prepare,......maybe she has been reading this book everyone mentions?

Nervouse, but already horny!

 

[chatwithme]

Wow...does lit work?

Last night as we were making love, i was orally satisfying Denise, and low and behold...i used my lubircated finger to press her puckered back side and she orgasmed with so much intensity....i told her how much i had wanted to introduce this into our lovemaking....she smiled and said she would on one condition....that i must be willing to allow her to introduce her own idea...

then she took me in her mouth, and used a small, somewhat curved vibrator around my balls and pressed the tip inside me right when i orgasmed...i spurted everywhere and A LOT....she says that she wants to dress special on Halloween, and that I can have her cherry that night- - if i am a good boy....

In the meantime, she wants to prepare,......maybe she has been reading this book everyone mentions?

Nervouse, but already horny!

 

[dragonhearted]

hmmmmmmmmmmmm...a triple post? Looks like someone is overjoyed at the turn of events!

 

[daisey69]

LOL

LOL, I have to admit, his enthusiasm is catchy....Iam all excited just reading his post

 

[chatwithme]

Sorry about the triple posting...it must have been the EXCITEMENT!

Well...last night we did it...we had time...we had the candles lit....we took a jacuzzi.....i used my mouth first....and boy did she go wild.....then I got some of that slick stuff and went slow at first, her on top like you said...it was just like the "lit" stories...she said it hurt at first and then she relaxed...she actually started saying really dirty things....but her orgasm was incredible...and so was mine. She also used her and to stimulate her clit which seemed to almost regulate the timing of her orgasms

later that night she gave me a blow job and used her tongue on me...when i was close to orgasming, she put her finger into me....man I think I'm the one going crazy now!