Wife and daughter taken by witch

[bobbrian14]

Looking for help with my fantasy. I'm relaxing at home with my wife and daughter when a man and woman force their way into the house. I'm tied up and made to watch as my wife and daughter are stripped and brutally raped in front of me. Turns out the woman is a witch and the man her assistant. I'm forced at gun point to tie up each of my girls one at a time, take them into the kitchen and present them to the witch. I have to butter them up, rub them down, and prep them for dinner. I'm allowed to have sex one last time with my wife before the witch finishes them both off and pops them in the oven. Personal emails at bobbrian14@yahoo.com Thanks for any help.

 

[Sean Renaud]

Looking for help with my fantasy. I'm relaxing at home with my wife and daughter when a man and woman force their way into the house. I'm tied up and made to watch as my wife and daughter are stripped and brutally raped in front of me. Turns out the woman is a witch and the man her assistant. I'm forced at gun point to tie up each of my girls one at a time, take them into the kitchen and present them to the witch. I have to butter them up, rub them down, and prep them for dinner. I'm allowed to have sex one last time with my wife before the witch finishes them both off and pops them in the oven. Personal emails at bobbrian14@yahoo.com Thanks for any help.

I think you should have sex with your daughter one last time too. Something about the Witch likes them specially seasoned. Definitly good for the brutal, shit why didn't I think of this story line. this has a beautifully brutal flair to it.

 

[Flashlight7.5]

therapy?

I think you need to see a therapist. I could see this being a wild sex story in a fantasy setting where the father/husband has to rescue the mother and daughter from a witch, but your desire to see your wife and daughter brutually raped and then eaten gives me pause.

 

[Never]

An ogress or a hag is more likely to enjoy popping people into the oven. Why does she pick your wife and daughter to eat?

 

[Equinoxe]

Er, perhaps I'm overthinking this, but why does the witch need a gun?

 

[Never]

Why wouldn't she? Magic users in most fantasy literature I've read aren't all powerful spell casters with an infinite supply of juice. If she were so powerful she didn't have need for a gun, why would she be breaking into people's houses? She'd be doing proper witch work like heading an evil cult and sending lackeys to abduct her meals instead of going herself.

 

[Equinoxe]

Why wouldn't she? Magic users in most fantasy literature I've read aren't all powerful spell casters with an infinite supply of juice. If she were so powerful she didn't have need for a gun, why would she be breaking into people's houses? She'd be doing proper witch work like heading an evil cult and sending lackeys to abduct her meals instead of going herself.

My point in general is that he hasn't really made any efforts to identify her as a witch, other than simply saying that she is -- the Hansel and Gretel or Baba Yaga style cannibalism aside. Granted, it's not a particularly developed concept at this point, but the whole witch thing seems tacked on, the character doesn't appear anything more than a cannibal with an assistant really. If he's going to introduce the folk tale or fairy tale element, the supernatural, I think it needs to really be introduced. If she has magickal powers, why isn't she using them? She only has to control one individual, she doesn't need to be all powerful.

Like you asked above, why is she merely breaking into an individual's house to eat his wife and daughter -- why them? It would make more sense if they came to her, if she's a witch, and not vice versa (or perhaps I'm sticking too close to old stories). Perhaps she's a witch in training, perhaps she's not very powerful and this is part of a initiation rite? Or maybe this is more of a modern suspense/cannibal erotica tale, something along the lines of supposed Satanic Ritual Abuse? Then again, perhaps it just doesn't seem a very subtle way of going about it, could the witch maybe charm him into doing it? Of course, that loses the whole unwillingness on his part, but that isn't necessarily a problem, although a sudden realisation of what he's done at the end doesn't seem to fit with the genre.

The gun thing was just sort of a reminder, to me, that he didn't really give anything to support her being a witch, just a brief aside that it turns out she's a witch. I'm probably overthinking it, trying to piece the story together with very little to go from.

 

[Never]

Equinoxe:
" My point in general is that he hasn't really made any efforts to identify her as a witch, other than simply saying that she is.."
He hasn't made any effort to identify the assistant, wife, or daughter other than saying than simply saying that they are.

" If she has magickal powers, why isn't she using them?"
Who said she isn't?

 

[Equinoxe]

He hasn't made any effort to identify the assistant, wife, or daughter other than saying than simply saying that they are.

Who said she isn't?

Those are both valid points; I'm not actually criticising the idea, I'm just trying to get a feel for where the idea is going. I mean, aside from her being a witch (and thus presumably magickal) does this story take place in a "realistic" world? Is she even magickal at all, or is this some other sort of witch? Is her being a witch intentionally mysterious? Is the world fundamentally absurd and things aren't explained, like a twisted modern day fairy tale?

 

[Never]

Okay, maybe the husband enlisted after high school, was wounded in combat, and come back to the states a quadriplegic. He turns to alcohol and surely slides down society's drain until he loses his job, apartment, and friends. He's about to shove a shotgun in his throat when the witch first appears. She promises him everything: a healthy body, a good job, a loving wife, a nice car - typical middle America dream.

Of course, there's a stipulation, something only a person ready to end his life would take. Years pass, he's a clean, hardworking man and 'makes it,' eventually he decides that this is mostly due to his own work and smarts so he renegades on whatever deal he had with said witch.

Nothing happens until his daughter's 18th birthday party, at which time he gets an unexpected but familiar visitor.

Better?

 

[Equinoxe]

Well, that would give a definite idea of the direction of the story, yes. Of course, unless you're writing the story, that doesn't really help -- a rather creative little tale though, I must say.

I somewhat suspect it's a moot point anyway.

 

[Never]

Wait - how would a quadriplegic shoot himself?

What do you mean, "...that doesn't really help..?" Well, fuck you and the horse you rode in on!

 

[Equinoxe]

Make him a paraplegic, some sort of incident with a landmine perhaps.

I meant that it doesn't help me to come up with ideas for his story, since I don't have any idea if that's the direction he's going.

I wish I had a horse, I like horses.