Why

[T.H. Oughts]

1.Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those
little bottles of Evian water?? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAÏVE

2.Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing
section in a swimming pool??

3.If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea....does that mean that one
actually enjoys it??

5.Why do we say something is out of whack?? What's a whack??

6.If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular??

7.Why is the man who invests your money called a broker??

8.Why do croutons come in airtight packages?? Aren't they just stale
bread to begin with??

9.If lawyers are disbarred & clergymen are defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys
deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked & dry cleaners
depressed??

10.Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks??

11.What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men??

12.If American mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons &
forks, ever wonder what Chinese mothers use?? Toothpicks??

13.Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?? What
are we supposed to do, write to them?? Why don't they just put their
pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while
they deliver the mail??

14.If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are
the others here for??

15.You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive!!

 

[riff]

Be sure you check out my upcoming thread on Dallas. I got a driving story to tell.

 

[Siren]

Hahahaha

 

[naudiz]

Whatever happened to Preparations A thru G?

 

[Guest]

 

[Daddyslilpet]

LMAO those are too funny!!

dixicritter

 

[markb325]

That was good....


Now riff what is this about Dallas?????

 

[T.H. Oughts]

1.Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those
little bottles of Evian water??

Ok, so who are the people that buy bottled water because it is trendy to be seen drinking it??????

 

[APhil]

How is it that we can be over whelmed, but not underwhelmed, or even whelmed?

Interesting scenario: BP (British Petroleum) bought out Tobacco Road, and are now selling Amoco (American Oil Company) gasoline. WTF???

 

[AnnaB]

A few that I got in an email to add to this!

Why does your gynecologist leave the room when you get undressed?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?

If you mated a bulldog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit?

Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for
centuries have a 'use by' date?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no-one would eat?

Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?

What do people in China call their good plates?

Can you sentence a homeless man to house arrest?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but not to their crotch when they ask where the toilet is?

 

[T.H. Oughts]

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Cause he was waiting for a chance to seduce Mary Ann.

 

[AnnaB]

Cause he was waiting for a chance to seduce Mary Ann.

Well there is that! *giggles*

 

[riff]

That was good....


Now riff what is this about Dallas?????

I spent my weekend in Dallas and brought my handicam with me.

You know, a camera is more powerful than a gun? I learned that this weekend.

 

[InnocentAngel81]

wow you got me thinkin now

 

[LadyDarkFire]

5.Why do we say something is out of whack?? What's a whack?? It's the hit you give something that's out of whack to put it back the way it should be.

6.If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?? Because Love is Blind, but Lust isn't.

11.What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?? Generally the color of the hair that he had before the guy went bald, as the man fills out the application, and is generally a wishful thinker.

14.If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?? To help themselves

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no-one would eat? So you know what setting to put it one under from.