Why So Serious?

[princesssexci]

Why So Serious?
By Ravenloft and Princesssexci​

“Now, don’t come back til you have Batman’s head on a platter!” The Joker yelled, pushing Harley out of their secret hide out. Harley sighed as she slumped against the wall of the building. How did her life get like this? One minute she’d been interning for Arkham Asylum, the next she was working hand in hand with a mad man, not that she’d really minded.

“Oh, whats a girl ta do?” Harley said.

This wouldn’t exactly be the easiest job in the world, getting Batmans head on a platter. As she walked down the streets of Gotham, she thought back on her life. How it had been before she’d broken Mistah J out of the asylum, when she wasn’t known as Harley Quinn but as Harleen Quinzel.
*****
“And these are where we place the convicts, here at Arkham Asylum.” The boss lady said. Her name was….Julia somethin. Harleen Quinzel wasn’t really paying attention. Sure, she should have been paying attention. It made sense to actually pay attention. Specially, if she was going to be workin here.
She passed by a few of the inmates whom Batman had fought a few times before. Poison Ivy, Hush, Two Faced….thats when she’d seen him. The Joker.

They’d made brief eye contact, only for a few second before one of Harley’s friends Jessica caught her attention again , whispering about where they’d go for lunch.

She gave the joker one last look before concentrating on her friend and then back to the boss lady. She was talking about the mental capacities of each inmate. Harley raised her hand immediately.

“Uh, Miss Julia will we be…interactin with these inmates?” Harley asked
Everyone’s eye was on Julia. Julia shook her head giving Harley a patronizing smile.

“I’m afraid not," Julia paused and looked down at her clipboard. "Miss Quinzel. Some of these criminals are much too…erratic for mere students to handle. If you do interact with them, it’d be only to give them their medicine and of course there will be a guard with you at all times. ”

She said that like they were inferiors compared to the idiot doctors that worked there! Harleen knew for a fact that some of the bozos couldn’t even get through to most of these convicts heads. The woman had moved on to another subject, leaving Harley to deal with her temper.

http://i435.photobucket.com/albums/qq74/litgirl2121/l_d06f7141987feeaedd00b7857cf5c83c.jpg

 

[Ravenloft]

He watched the group of student interns mill past his cage. Most of them looked away out of fear, one or two stuck their noses up, but one. Only one looked in, into his eyes. He followed her with his eyes until she passed out of sight, never once breaking his impassive expression. Once she was out of sight, he grinned, listening in. "Interactin?" He mimicked under his breath suppressing a chortle.

"Only meds... Meds and guards... What a clever idea." He whispered, this time unable to contain a laugh. Clearning his throat, he reached an arm through the bars of his cage and waved, calling out to them. "Yoo hoo, Miss Quinzel I'm a bit parched down here, might I have a glass of water?"

 

[princesssexci]

Harley stopped in mid-walk. Everyone was out to lunch or leaving for lunch. She bit her lip glancing back at the Joker. She chewed on her lip nervously and then sighed. It wasn't like she was afraid of the big bad clown. What was so...scary bout him anyways?

"Uh, Miss Julia. The clown he wants some...water." She figured it'd be best if she told Julia first, before going over to that cell. Julia nodded and ordered a guard to follow her.

"Don't talk too much to that one." Julia instructed. "He has a way of getting into the minds of others. I have a good feeling about you Miss Quinzel and I would hate for something bad to happen because you were foolish."

Harleen nodded, then poured a styrofoam cup of water then walked back over to the joker, handing it to him. "Here ya go." She said, then pressed her lips tightly together. She forgot she wasn't supposed to talk to him. The guard stood by her side, eyeing the joker suspiciously then pulled Harleen away.

 

[Ravenloft]

He took the styrofoam cup from Harleen. "Thank you." He replied as he lifted the cup to his lips. He looked into her eyes as he slowly drained the cup, ignoring the suspicious guard the whole while. The trick worked, the guard was too busy 'watching him' to notice the note he quickly slipped into Harleen's pocket. "You're an ANGEL!" He called out after her as the guard pulled her away.

OOC: The note has a web address and a user name, but no password writen on it.

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen gave him a timid smile, before turning her attention back to getting something to eat for lunch. She decided to go to the cafeteria, thats where her friends were anyways even though they had discussed going out to eat, getting sick of the hospital food because it tasted like throw up.

Harleen reached into her pocket to pay for her sandwhich and milk, then frowned as she pulled out the note. It had a web address on it, with a user name but no password.

Odd she thought before paying for her food and sitting with her friends.

OOC: In your next post, could you explain what the Joker wants her to do with the note. *is confuzzled*

 

[Ravenloft]

Tabi, one of Harleen's friends nudged her as she sat down. "How about that: 'Miss Quinzel, might I have a glass of water.'" She teased. "And to think, you actually went over and gave it to that nut. You know, I heard he gave himself those scars..." Tabi visably shivered in her seat as she continued. "Eeeew, creepy."

OOC: PMed you about the note.

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen smiled, "Well he is a nut case. I wouldn't be surprised." Harleen said, taking a bite of her sandwhich. "Besides, the guard was with me. It wasn't like he could do anything with the guard there." She wondered if she should tell her friends about the note that the joker had passed to her. She wasn't an idiot, she knew he'd done it. Nah, they'd probably disuade her from lookin at it.

After following the doctors around the whole day, giving inmates water and their medicine. Finally, Harleen arrived home. She got on her computer, went to the web address and quickly jotted down the user name. Puddin. It asked for a password though.

She didn't have a password. What dumbass would give her a note and not....

"You're and ANGEL!"

The words rang in her head.

Quickly, she typed it out. Angel.

It worked! Now, she was staring at the Jokers blog. She smiled, "Too dangerous huh? Well, lookie what I've got Miss boss lady." She said to herself with a smile. They'd definately be lettin her give cooks their medicine now.

 

[Ravenloft]

6-20-08

Mood: NOT Amused!

Damn that Bat and his stupid party favors! Him and his bird brained boy blunder. He spoiled the light show! If only I could get his head on a platter! A silver platter! Yeah, yeah... Polished to a mirror sheen. I know I would have succeeded if only I'd have had someone at my side... A sidekick. Brilliant, that brings a smile to my face! But... Where would I find a court jester worthy of the clown prince of crime!?

Signature: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

6-17-08

Mood: Amused

The invitations have been sent, and the party is only an hour away. I do hope that Batsy comes, cause this partys going to be a BANG! Why, all of Gotham will be seeing THESE fireworks! It'll be a display to remember! Like what Guy Fawkes day should have been. Hah! Hahahahahaha!

Signature: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen read the entries over and over. She had gotten the gist of it, obviously these were previously entered blogs by the joker. It appeared that so far...the only thing driving the joker to his madness was Batman. It was expected of course, after all....The joker had been deemed the villain and Batman the hero, whether Gotham City wanted to acknowledge that or not, it was still true.

"Hm..." Harleen mumbled, as she read over the most recent blog entry. He was lookin for a sidekick? Wasn't that a bit over dramatic? After all, there wasn't anything great about Batman's sidekick. It just made him look more important than he really was.

She continued to read through the past entries.

 

[Ravenloft]

6-10-08

Mood: Jockular

Did you know that fireworks factory workers go up in flames? I didn't know that! It sure was a sight though. Not HALF as spectacular as what I have in store for that bat brained vigilante... And they thing I'm crasy, but at least I don't walk around with rubber nipples on my chest! Hey, to each their own, I wear makeup, he wears black rubber, and his side kick wears tights. But, noooo, no judgments here.

Signature: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

6-1-08

Mood: Jovial

Here's a grown man that stalks the night with a teenaged boy, purportedly striking fear in the hearts of evil men. He calls himself the dark knight, master detective. MAYBE HE SHOULD GET A CLUE! He's scaring no one! Except for maybe GLAAD.

Signature: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen couldn't help but laugh at the other two entries. It sorta made sense, everything the joker was sayin. Sort of. Though, she couldn’t really get into his head by just readin stuff he wrote. She had to delve deeper and the only way to do that, was to become his councelor. It made perfect sense, besides it would push her up the latter to psychology success.

Harleen took one last look at the four entries, printed them out, then went to bed. The next morning, after making the doctors coffee and serving some of the inmates, excluding the joker because…Tabbi was serving joker today, she talked to Miss Julia.

“Miss Bo..erm, Miss Julia. Has the councelor for the joker come in yet?” Harleen asked Julia casually.

Julia looked up from her paper work and raised her eyebrow, checked her watch, and then shook her head. “No, he hasn’t. Odd. He must be delayed. Thank you Harleen. I should probably call the other psychologists and see..”

“I could do it!” Harleen exclaimed

Julia paused and looked at Harleen, raising her eyebrow again. “Do you realize what you’re asking? The joker is a dangerous man. What he deems as fun is a potential danger. You’re new here and he could easily take advantage…”

“I can do it, really! I promise ya, I won’t disappoint. I just think that…maybe he needs a bit of a feminine touch. I mean, really guys would never confess to another guy his own feelins, makes him look weak. He is still a man, after all.” Harleen gave her best smile.

Julia nodded, “Fine, you have a half an hour. If you’re not out by then…”

“I will be, I swear!”

“And remember Ms. Quinzel, this is a test run. Don’t expect to do this every day.”

And so, now Harleen stood outside the jokers cell, biting her lip before slowly entering.

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker stood with a palette in one hand and a paint brush in the other, wearing a french beret on his head as he painted something on the canvas before him. He looked up. "Hello Puddin, I was hoping you would be comming today. Come, look what I painted." He said, motioning her over to see, stepping back and folding his arms to ponder his work critically.

It was a picasso-esque rendering of her, dressed in a jester's outfit. "I hope you don't mind, after you gave me that cup of water, I felt... Inspired. What do you think I should call it? I was thinking: 'The makings of a mad-woman.' Catchy huh?"

 

[princesssexci]

"Hello Puddin, I was hoping you would be comming today. Come, look what I painted."

"Harleen...or Ms. Quinzel." Harleen instantly corrected. She walked over to the see the painting, interested and thought that maybe it would give her some insight on the mad clown.

Her eyes widened and she stared at the joker in question.

"I hope you don't mind, after you gave me that cup of water, I felt... Inspired. What do you think I should call it? I was thinking: 'The makings of a mad-woman.' Catchy huh?"

"I hardly think so." She grumbled, crossing her arms against her chest. "Anyways, down to business. For the next.." she glanced at her watch, "25 minutes, I'll be ya councelor for the day."

Harleen took a seat in a chair. "So, it says here that your childhood is unknown, why dontcha tell me about that."

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker placed his hand over his heart, bowing his head slightly. "Too soon for pet names? I appologize, Ms. Quinzel. Not an art person, I take it? Oh well." He replied as he went and stretched out on his cot.

"You wanna know about my childhood? My father...was...a drinker, and a fiend. And one night, he goes off craaazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn't like that. Not...one...BIT. So...me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me...and he says..."WHY SO SERIOUS?". He comes at me with the knife..."WHY SO SERIOUS?!". Sticks the blade in my mouth..."LET'S PUT A SMILE ON THAT FACE!"...aaaand...why so serious?"

 

[princesssexci]

"Too soon for pet names? I appologize, Ms. Quinzel. Not an art person, I take it? Oh well."

Harleen didn't respond, obviously this man was mad. Who would give their own councelor a pet name though she was sort of flattered. Sorta. She watched him warily as he laid down on the cot.

"You wanna know about my childhood? "

"Yep."

"My father...was...a drinker, and a fiend. And one night, he goes off craaazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn't like that."

She started writing this down, immediately. Drinking father, scared mother. Things were sort of starting to make sense.

"Not...one...BIT. So...me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me...and he says..."WHY SO SERIOUS?"

Her eyes widened as she quickly scribbled that down. Now things were really starting to make sense...not only was his father an abusive towards his mother but a drinker as well.

Oh she was gettin bonus points for this.

" Sticks the blade in my mouth..."LET'S PUT A SMILE ON THAT FACE!"

Harleen gasped, no man could really do such a thing...to his own child could he?

"...aaaand...why so serious?"

She paused in her writing and glared at the joker, though a small smile tried to appear really quickly. "That wasn't very funny..." Oh jeez, what if he wasn't jokin? Then what? "If that was a joke..." Harleen glanced at her watch. "And ya got...15 more minutes. So lets move onto another subject then, huh?" She paused trying to remember somethin from the blog she'd read the night before. "Oh! Tell me about ya relationship...with Batman."

 

[Ravenloft]

"Ah, the Bat!" The Joker exclaimed as he sprang from the cot he'd been laying on, clasping his hands behind his back and pacing back and forth. "The Dark Knight, the Caped Crusader, the world's greatest spoil sport! Always crashing my parties, never shares his toys. You just know he must have been an only child, right? Hehehehe! I think thats why he has that bird brained side kick of his, to make up for his lonely childhood... To be frank, if anyone belongs in here, its Batsy!"

 

[princesssexci]

He had caused her to smile...again, though she tried not to as he spoke of Batman. He seemed to get more energetic when talking about him, more lively. She watched as he paced back and forth. Harleen could practically see the..vigor in his eyes as he spoke.

"Hehehehe! I think thats why he has that bird brained side kick of his, to make up for his lonely childhood... To be frank, if anyone belongs in here, its Batsy!"

Harleen pursed her lips trying not to let her smile be seen. "And why do you think that?"

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker narrowed his eyes, his permanent grin growing wider still as he continued pacing back and forth. "I have a theory. And it goes a little something like this. The Batman causes more trouble than he's worth! Oh, he's such an inspiration! Striking fear in the heart of crime, cleaning up the streets of Gotham, protecting the innocent? Pft!"

The Joker stopped pacing and crouched down in front of Harleen, his hands on his knees, so as to be at eye level with her, the intensity in his eyes unmistakeable. There was no doubt that he wholeheartedly believed everything he was saying. "How many criminals do you supposed he's locked away? A hundred, five, a thousand? And still more take their place. And does he ever realize that he's fighting on the losing side? Noooo, he actually thinks he's making things better. He's just a bandaid on the hemhoraging wound that is Gotham City.

The Joker reached out and gently lifted Harleen's chin so that she looked into his eyes as he said. "Now the secret, the dirty little secret is, the longer he plays this game, the more villains he creates. His very existance just begs for opposition. The Penguin, the Riddler, Two-Face, Poison Ivy, etc., etc., etc. Oh, he's definately an inspiration, but don't you think he's inspiring the wrong people, Ms. Quinzel?"

The guard outside of the cell took notice of the Jokers close proximity to Ms. Quinzel and tapped at the bars with his baton. "Is everything alright Ms. Quinzel?" The guard asked as his keys jingled in his hand.

 

[princesssexci]

The joker didn't stop pacing but his mood seemed more determined, more...jovial at talking about Batman's miscomings. She watched, her pencil stuck on her notepad.

"I have a theory. And it goes a little something like this. The Batman causes more trouble than he's worth! Oh, he's such an inspiration! Striking fear in the heart of crime, cleaning up the streets of Gotham, protecting the innocent? Pft!"

She looked up at him, raising her eyebrow as she watched his facial expression and leaned back against the chair as he made eye contact with her after crouching near her, ever so closely. Did he honestly believe all this crap he was saying? It appeared so. She averted her gaze back to her clipboard of notebook paper and wrote down, Jokers theory

"How many criminals do you supposed he's locked away? A hundred, five, a thousand? And still more take their place. And does he ever realize that he's fighting on the losing side? Noooo, he actually thinks he's making things better. He's just a bandaid on the hemhoraging wound that is Gotham City."

He certainly did have the oddest way of describing things, didn't he? Her chin was lifted and she gulped as she wasn't able to look away this time.

"Now the secret, the dirty little secret is, the longer he plays this game, the more villains he creates. His very existance just begs for opposition. The Penguin, the Riddler, Two-Face, Poison Ivy, etc., etc., etc. Oh, he's definately an inspiration, but don't you think he's inspiring the wrong people, Ms. Quinzel?"

Harleen gulped and opened her mouth to answer his question with a question. It was how most psychiatrists did it, even when she was in college she learned, not to take sides...especially with those her were a bit loopy, though loopy wasn't exactly the right word to describe the Joker.

"Is everything alright Ms. Quinzel?"

The guard's voice broke through her thoughts. "Yeah, everything's fine."

She glanced at her watch...10 minutes left. "Alright, so you dislike Batman." She stated, still attempting to be nuetral. "But I mean, is it really even necessary to have him drive to the point of...." her voice trailed off, not wanting to say the wrong thing, to upset him.

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker stood up and waved politely at the guard as he scoffed and turned his back on them.
The Joker waited for Harleen to finish her sentence for a few seconds before offering a word. "...Murder?" He looked down at the pad of paper in her hands. "You'll want to write that down... Em, You, Are, Dee, Eee, Are."

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen had another choked back laughter start to rise. "I know how to spell, thank ya very much. Just because I'm blonde, doesn't mean I'm a dumb blonde..." She stood up after glancing at her watch. "Times up, and if I stay here any longer...well they might think I'm plannin your escape or somethin." She said, it was meant as a joke but there was total serious behind it.

"If all goes well, i'll see ya tomorrow, mistah J."

 

[Ravenloft]

"We wouldn't want them to think that, now, would we?" The Joker replied, flashing Harleen a grin. "Mistah J... I like that... I don't mind telling you, I feel like a million bucks. And believe me, I KNOW what a million bucks feels like. Kind of dirty really, but good, oh so good! Be seein' ya tomorow, Ms. Quinzel."

The Joker spent the rest of the day humming 'pop goes the weasel' to himself as he politely co-operated with the guards. He even got a walk on the asylum's grounds where he picked a little flower and stick it in the chest pocket of his shirt.

 

[princesssexci]

The next day, Julia had been so pleased with how Harleen had handled the joker. "You got a lot more information than his normal doctor gets. Mr. Winslow was actually rather shocked. We'll keep you visiting him, after all...I do see a point to where he might respond better to a woman."

Harleen smiled brightly as Tabi watched her in near envy. "I can't believe you've already been promoted to doctors assistant. How can you stand being in the same room with...that?" She nodded her head towards the joker's cell.

Harleen rolled her eyes, "Hey, ya gotta do whatcha gotta do to get where ya gotta go."

A few hours later, Harleen walked into the jokers cell. "Hello, Mr. Joker." She said, sitting down in the chair once again, "How has your day been so far?"

 

[Ravenloft]

"My day's much better, now that you're here. Please, Harleen, my dear, no need to be so formal though. Mr. J is just fine. In fact, I've been thinking, and I was wondering what you would think of a nick name... I know, I know, all your books say NOT to allow such things, but hey... I figure we're all friends here, right? I mean... Aren't we?" He asked, holding his hat in his hands, fiddling with the brim as he asked.

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen took a quick glance out of the cell where the guard stood in case the joker needed to be apprehended. She didn't see any harm in having nicknam,es, after all...it was just a name, right? Harleen bit her lip and nodded, "Alright..." she said, hesitantly.

Man, if anyone were to find out.