Why do people lie...

[Kajira Callista]

when the truth is usually easier to deal with then the lie?

 

[WriterDom]

And the truth is so much easier to remember.

 

[Kajira Callista]

I suppose this is a question that can't be answered eh?

 

[fallon2]

especially

Especially when people lie to cover up the lie.

 

[dolf]

i dunno...
i occasionally try to lie, but i get bored after a few minutes and tell the truth truth is much more fun {and so much better to offend with} i'm a big fan of honesty.

i think perhaps people lie out of habit. maybe it starts in childhood {to get out of trouble or to try to impress people} and they never grow out of it. every compulsive fibber i ever met was seriously lacking in maturety and social skills.

i'm sure someone smart will come and answer your question for you KC
xx

 

[Desdemona]

Maybe they lie because they can't face the truth. It's a cowardly thing to do.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I'm not sure I have the answers either....I think compulsive liars in the pathological sense have a real problem that needs therapy in most if not all cases. Those who choose to lie sporadically I think often do so because as Des says, it appears easier than telling the truth, risking offending another, can be a way to try and make people like them etc., or worse, is a game to them. Complex and much too difficult to try and keep track of the lies IMO. Hope whatever is troubling you feels better soon.

Catalina

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[bunny bondage]

lying is a way to control the situation. it's a sign of severe insecurity, and as dolf said, it is usually indicitave of other social problems as well

 

[incubus'_sub]

May we ask what prompted the sad question from our happy girl? I suspect there's a large hurt been caused by someone's careless little lie.

 

[Kajira Callista]

People lie to me all the time, and something else is...they assume i lie because they do. Strangely i believe people are honest because i am, so when it ends up to be a lie i kind of feel betrayed in some way. So even if it is a "little white lie" (which is still a lie to me) it makes me feel kinda bad. I dunno if it makes sense but it was just on my mind last night, was wondering how other people see, understand, and feel about lies.

 

[catalina_francisco]

People lie to me all the time, and something else is...they assume i lie because they do. Strangely i believe people are honest because i am, so when it ends up to be a lie i kind of feel betrayed in some way. So even if it is a "little white lie" (which is still a lie to me) it makes me feel kinda bad. I dunno if it makes sense but it was just on my mind last night, was wondering how other people see, understand, and feel about lies.

I used to feel much the same but now sem to have moved to thinking it is their choice. I don't have to do the same, nor do I have to understand why they do it, I just accept they do now and move on. I have a problem though with the fact no matter how many times a person lies to me, it takes a huge amount of times before I begin to presume what they say could and likely is a lie. I try not to judge them for it, and find it is more the norm than the exception in today's world unfortunately which means it is something I find I have to learn to live with.

I am developing better strategies for protecting myself, but ultimately I believe it has to be their choice, them who lives with the consequences either now or later in a spiritual sense, so I do not feel I have to avoid their friendship or acquaintance because of it unless it has been hugely harmful to me or mine, nor do I have to judge them harshly for it because it is not my way. It has taken a long time to reach that point of comfort and acceptance though.

Catalina

 

[FungiUg]

I've always assumed that people lie for reasons of personal insecurity... or to get what they want, regardless of the other person/people.

So the common one of the married man lying about being single, for example -- because he wants sex, and most women won't go with a married man.

So it's all too often because we are very selfish, I guess.

 

[A Desert Rose]

People lie for lots of reasons.

I hope you're ok.

 

[WriterDom]

So the common one of the married man lying about being single, for example -- because he wants sex, and most women won't go with a married man.

There are women who prefer a married man. I've never heard of a single guy lying about being married though.

The last time I lied online was 1996. I was chatting with a 25 year old when I was 39 and told her I was 32. Little did I know that one day I would fly up there to spend a sex filled weekend with her. I pulled it off too, until the bartender at the airport read my birth year out loud when I ordered a green beer. It was St. Patrick's day. Of course she was sitting right there. I didn't know I was busted till I got back.

 

[snowy ciara]

Couldn't tell you why. But it'd be cool to know if you figure it out.

 

[PyroDemon]

KC, if you can ever find out why people lie and cannot be honest about even the simplest of things, please, let me know. I have a hard time ever trusting someone ever after even the smallest of lies and deceit. Of course, I take everyone at face value till they prove otherwise. But lies tend to always catch up with you eventually, no matter what they are about.

 

[Marquis]

Always remember, you can't trust people, you can only trust people to be themselves.

This reminds me of something that happened to me once. I was dating two girls at once and I came home to find both of them waiting at my doorstep.

My real girlfriend grabbed my collar and screamed "this little slut told me she's been sucking your dick for 3 months!"

I said "you can't believe her, just last week she told me she wasn't going to say nothing."

Hope I could cheer you up a little KC.

 

[Desdemona]

There are all sorts of lies. For instance, why would a man you meet online send you a picture that's at least 15 years old? Why would he tell you he is 6'1" and when you meet him he is 5'3"? It seems so silly to me. It's not the appearance that bothers me... it's the fact that he would be dishonest about something that will smack me in the face as soon as I meet him for the first time. That leaves me thinking: "If he will lie about such a simple thing, then what else is he lying about?"

Oh yeah, this happened Saturday night. Needless to say, I don't trust him any further than I could pick him up and heave him across the room and won't be going out with him again simply based on these simple untruths.

 

[Kajira Callista]

Kasey isn't sad or hurting no wories people. She is just in that weird deep thinking phase these days. I really just wanted to know why people lie.

 

[DVS]

Kasey isn't sad or hurting no wories people. She is just in that weird deep thinking phase these days. I really just wanted to know why people lie.

In some cases, it's habitual. They don't know any different and think everybody does it.

They might have no life of they're own, always lying about it, instead. And, if they always lie, they will never have a life.

They might think you want to hear something one way, and that will get them what they want, sooner. There's a lot of those out there.

Or, they might have an image problem, no self-esteem. They want to be more than they are, so they create an image as a front. They don't think any further than this front, and think it will be enough to get them the thrills they need in life.

Who cares, if someone's hurt in the process? Life goes on. Even if you see though their front, another chump will come along, soon.

 

[DVS]

WOW, we've got our first snow of the winter! There's 18 inches of heavy wet snow out there, and all of the limbs are about to break from the weight. I might lose electiricy at any time, and I could also lose my phone, and that would mean my Internet connection would go, too.

So, if you don't hear from me for a while, it's probably because some limb couldn't handle the weight and fell on

 

[DVS]

Sorry, but I lied. It was just a little white lie. Ha Ha...get it? White? Snow?

Well, we did get our first snow of the winter. But, it's only about 6-8 inches. It is very wet and heavy, though, and the limbs are having a problem with the weight.

My lights have flickered a few times, and I sure hope the electricity stays on. There are parts of town without lights because limbs fell on power lines. Electricity is necessary. It runs the furnace!!

 

[Despina]

Lying serves many purposes.

Sometimes, it's for good: protection, safety, biding time, etc.

Often, it's to avoid: avoid causing pain, instilling doubt, admitting failure, etc.

Always, it's manipulative. Whether for good or bad, a lie is a manipulation.

As a child, I lied for two reasons.

1) To escape judgment.
2) To see if I could get away with it.

As an adult, honesty is paramount.



~D

 

[Kajira Callista]

Sorry, but I lied. It was just a little white lie. Ha Ha...get it? White? Snow?

Well, we did get our first snow of the winter. But, it's only about 6-8 inches. It is very wet and heavy, though, and the limbs are having a problem with the weight.

My lights have flickered a few times, and I sure hope the electricity stays on. There are parts of town without lights because limbs fell on power lines. Electricity is necessary. It runs the furnace!!

thats what the fireplace and generator are for silly dvs