why arent some people as open as others

[sexy-girl]

why aren't some people as eager to post their pictures on literotica or to talk about the city they live


two things made me think of this bratcats thread about asking tourist attractions and nasty petitioning me to post my face


i was about to post the tourists sites (there's not many) of my town in bratcats thread but i thought it would be all too easy to find out where i live/work


why am i worried about this im not 100% sure ... but having a stalker in past and being fully aware of how many lurkers are on this board and some other things that happened recently ... i guess with all that i just go on the side of caution ... does anyone else have any special reasons for not wishing to be as open on here


am i stupid or am i missing out by not being open should we all be completely open on these boards ... i do admire the people that are more open do they look down on the others that arent ?

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Rubyfruit]

I've wondered this myself, Sexy.

I am very open. It's hard for me not to be. I don't know why. I trust people and I know how to take care of myself. Also, I think that I'm a fairly good judge of character.

I've never been stalked.

 

[sexy-girl]

i was going to use london but everyone knows it too well ... i did think it was a good idea for a thread though

as for the pics ... we're see



ruby part of maybe why i dont go overboard with revealing to many things is i have a girlfriend to keep me in check that reads literotica ... part of it is also the gayness factor ... i prefer to tell people i choose to about that then people knowing first ... but the likely hood of someone that i would meet for real reading that stuff on here ... i dont know ... maybe people are over cautious that aren't as open


saying that there are four posters at literotica that have seen my face (not saying who) and im not allowed to increase that number while lisa is away lol

 

[Wiggles]

If you live in Alaska, or somewhere else that isn't very populated, then I think it's reasonable to be a little worried.

I don't look down on others for not sharing things, In fact I really don't notice who does or doesn't share info.

 

[Rambling Rose]

The more you reveal the more you open yourself up to invasion of privacy. I don't often talk about where I live, what I do, or even what I really think about many, many things. The internet is so huge and there are so many unregistered viewers on any bulletin board that, if you've had any trouble in the past, it is only prudent to err on the side of caution.

I posted my face as an avatar for a short time and noticed how many views the thread got versus responses. I am often curious about what others look like but not enough to risk exposure myself for any length of time. There are voyeurs and there are those who choose to expose. I admire the chutzpah it takes for some here to be so open with us.

 

[sexy-girl]

I admire the chutzpah it takes for some here to be so open with us.

chutzpah

n : aggressive boldness or unmitigated effrontery; "he had the audacity to question my decision" [syn: audacity, audaciousness, hutzpa]
Source: WordNet ® 1.6, © 1997 Princeton University


i like that word


my town and where i work is small enough that if people knew what i looked like and where i lived they could run into me if they wanted too

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

why aren't some people as eager to post their pictures on literotica or to talk about the city they live

I have posted my pic twice, but I will never use it in my Av. Anybody I trust I will send my face pic (and a little more if I really like them ) via email, but if I put my face up in my Av, and it got around in my local professional community that I frequent Lit. I could find it very hard to get a job (it is hard enough now).

It is one thing for people who have family who understand and/or who don't have a lot at stake professionally, but my parents are so straight laced they won't watch a science show if it discusses evolution (they think it conflicts with creationism), they won't even talk in whispered tones about the fact that one (or more) of my uncles is gay, and I would never hear the end of it if they knew I was here.

As it is, I give away way too much info about myself here - if any of my family read most of my posts they would be able to figure out who I was. I don't think that is much of a risk as I really doubt any of them are here. Family acquaintences on the other hand would recognize my face.

As for where I live - I make no secret about the general area, it being Seattle, there are just too many people here to make any correlation.

 

[*bratcat*]

Re: Re: why arent some people as open as others

 

[Guest]

I don't share where I live cause if I don't want someone to know, it's none of their business. I used to work for a small airline, and I refused to give my last name to irate customers. It pissed them off, but I was listed in the phone book, and I didn't want my house egged or worse, bombed.

On a personal level, when I get to know a person, I will tell them where I live. I've even talked to people here on the phone from Lit. But there are a lot of people that never register, and only read, and I don't know who they are. I certainly don't want strangers to know where I live when I don't even know them.

Course I was raped once, eons ago, and the guy had a very wierd warped sense of reality. I'm a little (or a LOT) protective of my self. It will never happen to me again, or I'll have to kill them.

K, a little strong there, but that's how I feel.

Moon

 

[patient1]

I don't think you should take chances if you've been stalked.

Many of us are aware that an association with a website loaded with stories of non-consent & incest would be frowned upon by existing or potential employers. It doesn't fit in with the corporate culture, or the opinions of the school board.We have liscenses , character references, etc. as requirements in our field.

No need to limit ourselves or our raises unnescessarily.

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

it's understandable sexy-girl

as for me noone knows where I live even after I tellthem so I don't care about telling.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Re: Re: Re: why arent some people as open as others

I know where you like to eat.

Well everyone knows what I like to eat - pussy. Ohhh! You said where I like to eat! Ooops! Never mind.

 

[CarolineOh]

I haven't had any problems with stalkers, if I did I might become much less open.
But as it is, I live smack dab in the middle of a city of 4 million people, I own my own business, which is not likely to be adversely effected by anyone seeing me here, my SO is a registered member, I don't have kids who might stumble across it,my friends would all think it was cool that I post here (a few lurk) and my family would just roll their eyes and think "well what's she up to now?"
Change any one of those factors and I would be much less open. So it isn't a matter of character to me, as much as it is opportunity.

 

[Sillyman]

Well, there is fear of judgenment, fear of scary Net people, fear of discovery by relatives or friends, whole bunches of stuff. I don't care if anyone in my family recognizes me. If they don't want to see me like this, they should fuck off, but few people are as comfortable as me.

 

[LukkyKnight]

why am i worried about this im not 100% sure ... but having a stalker in past and being fully aware of how many lurkers are on this board and some other things that happened recently ... i guess with all that i just go on the side of caution ... does anyone else have any special reasons for not wishing to be as open on here


am i stupid or am i missing out by not being open should we all be completely open on these boards ... i do admire the people that are more open do they look down on the others that arent ?

Bravery and stupidity are very hard to distinguish. Caution is appropriate when you aren't sure. Many read who never post, obviously, and some are predatory. Never forget that.

 

[SleepingWarrior]

Personally I have no problem showing my pic or naming the city I live in even though it isn't all that big. But when it comes to information about who I am inside I guard that fiercely. If you can figure out general stuff by what and how I post thats fine but when it comes to hard details about my personality its no way, no how. Call me weird if you want but hey it's what I think.

 

[Nora]

Hell, I don't enjoy looking at myself. Why would i assume anyone else would be?

 

[concrete]

can't fully understand this radical parriniod sensation that as swept across this country
post ..what you want to post
,if you are scared...............get a bigger dog
,if you cannot be yourself... then life out your sick fantasy's latter

 

[morninggirl5]

I've posted enough here that someone who knew me would be able to figure out who i am, pretty easily. I don't post my pictures or anything more identifying because quite simply, i could lose my job. Each year when i sign my contract, i have to swear an oath to uphold all the laws of the state. There are also clauses in the Code of Ethics that discuss moral behavior. Since teachers in my state are no longer able to be tenured, if the principal wishes to, my contract can be non-renewed, no reason necessary to prove i'm not doing my job. One parent in my school who knows me and sees my face here and it would very likely happen. That's the reality.

 

[cymbidia]

I've been very open about quite a lot of personal stuff in the time i've been here. I won't ever, however, post a pic of my face here or give out too much info about where i live (though if you'd been half conscious and read 1/8 of my posts in the last year you'd already know). Additionally, i've been unfortunate enough to have an online stalker who followed me around the net for along time before showing up at my front door one sunny morning, a fistful of roses in one hand and his suitcase in the other. He'd come to stay awhile and get to know me better. I'm not risking that happening again.

I have kids.
I live in a small town.
When i'm working, i'm a public school teacher.

Ergo: limited public openness from me about me.

 

[modest mouse]

sexy-girl,

Its more about what you're comfortable with. keep in mind that this is a completely public forum. It can be deceiving witht he sense of community but all info on the BB is public, totally, absolutely.

having control over what info is available about you is not always being closed off, or unavailble. It can be perfectly healthy and has no realation to waht you can share with friends.

You should not feel somehow left out or less than brave for not posting pix and disclosing information. Each person's situation is unique and you know yours better than any of us so your decision should be the one that matters.

(Miss the football bikini av)

 

[Guest]

Open! Open? Hey look, I'm nekked and fucking here!

 

[YogiBare]

Sexy-girl, I don't think that there's any official "right answer" to the privacy/disclosure issue. Do whatever is comfortable, and be comfortable with whatever you do.

I do no post my face or name for professional reasons.

 

[Private Vasquez]

that kinda info is on a need-to-know basis.

I don't think that telling folks the city I live in is so bad, but I also don't think it's all that important for folks to know.

As for pictures, I also don't think that's important. There is one picture of me in one of the threads here...when I was 4. What I look like is also on a need-to-know basis. If someone was cool, and just curious as to what this private looks like, I'm sure I could email something...but that depends on the individual asking. Not that I mind if folks know what I look like, I'd rather just be a Barbie around here.