Whitherfor art though, Rommeo!!!!!!!

[DurtGurl]

Darn I submitted a story about a weak ago and its still not posted which dirtMan helped me wright. What do you haf to do around hear to get a storrie poasted!

Oh, well I'll entertain myself with some potery and others, too.

Here I sit broaken hearted,
Paid to ............. ummm .... heck Im no good at poutery either.

Truely your's,
DurtGurl

 

[MathGirl]

DurtGurl's dilemma

Dear DurtGurl,
Be patient, dear. I'm sure your story will be posted soon and that it will be wonderful. Remember, we are all on your side.
Lovingly,
MG

 

[DurtGurl]

Gosh!!!!

Dear MathGirle,
Thank you for the lovly reply. Its so kind of you to be nice to a newcommer like me. You must be a wonnderful persan probably smart and georgous too. I'd like too be just like you when I growe up.
Sincerly,
DurtGurl

pS! Is that pitcher that gos with your mesages realy you?????

 

[openthighs_sarah]

Re: Gosh!!!!

Dear MathGirle,
Thank you for the lovly reply. Its so kind of you to be nice to a newcommer like me. You must be a wonnderful persan probably smart and georgous too. I'd like too be just like you when I growe up.
Sincerly,
DurtGurl

That's "persian", I think. And MathGirl's not grown up yet.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Re: Gosh!!!!

Dear MathGirle,
Thank you for the lovly reply. Its so kind of you to be nice to a newcommer like me. You must be a wonnderful persan probably smart and georgous too. I'd like too be just like you when I growe up.
Sincerly,
DurtGurl

pS! Is that pitcher that gos with your mesages realy you?????

She IS smart and gorgeous and wonderful - but just like you, she sucks at languages.

 

[DurtGurl]

Gee whis!!!!!

High everbody,
Gosh your all so nice here!!!! Its really nice to be made to feal right at home in some place Im a stranger to and have never been before either.

I can hardely wait until I can put a pitcher of myself over there on the west side of my massages. How long do i got to wate until I can due that!! I have a neat picther my boyfriend wayne took of my bear pussey. He says its the prettiest one in town and lots of the other guys too.

By for now but ill be back just like arnold in "terminator. ha ha
DGurl

 

[DurtGurl]

Pruritis ani

Hi again al,
I'm begining to wander if there ever going to post that storey on here I sent in about a week ago and that DirtMan helped me wright. I'm really on pens and needels if you know what I mean. You do, right!!!!!!!!

Im so nerveas about it that it makes me sort of itch you know where. Yep, there

DG

I wishe that nice MathGirl would leve me a mesagge here, she's so sweet. Mayebe shel'l see this and write to me I sure hop so.

 

[pop_54]

Re: Pruritis ani

Hi again al,
I'm begining to wander if there ever going to post that storey on here I sent in about a week ago and that DirtMan helped me wright. I'm really on pens and needels if you know what I mean. You do, right!!!!!!!!

Im so nerveas about it that it makes me sort of itch you know where. Yep, there

DG

I wishe that nice MathGirl would leve me a mesagge here, she's so sweet. Mayebe shel'l see this and write to me I sure hop so.

Hello DurtGurl nice to see you here again, shame your story hasn't materialised yet, I'm not using too many big words am I love? Nice to hear all the guys like your pet Beaver as well.

Listen love, between you and me, don't take too much notice of MG, lovely girl, sorry gurl, but she does take the piss a bit, and I'd hate to think of you having the wool pulled over your eyes, probably beats the paper bag but there, sorry I digress.

pops...........

 

[MathGirl]

Disregard the above

Dear DurtGurl,

Don't pay any attention to Pop, dear. Just between you and me, he's full of shit.

Please be patient about your story. You're a new writer here, and maybe the editors are reading your submission especially carefully. I expect they are awestruck at the beauty and fluidity of your artful prose.

You might consider investing in a spell checking program, dear. There are a few minor problems with large, clumsy words with which even the most accomplished author has problems. I suggest that when you shop for the aforementioned spell checker, you select the industrial model designed for hard use.

Best Wishes,
MG

 

[DurtGurl]

Wow!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear MathGirl,
Thank you so much for replyeing to my little note. Its' great to know that somone as nice as you is on my side.

I have one sleight problem, thouhg. Some sonofabitch put somthing about "morning lighte" at the bottom of my mesages and i can't get it off. Oh, I didn't mean it like that. Of coarse i can get it off with a guy or even with my vibrattar. I mean I cant' get the gosh darn "; morning light;" thing off my bottom. No, i didnt wright that righte. Its not on my botom; its' on the botem of the mesages. can you help me with tht!

Waighting with baited breathe,
DG

See it's that "i sea the mourning light" shit down there

Ps. Oh almost forgot. I submitted another storey to go along with the first one that hasent' been poasted eather yet. I hope it wasnt DirtMan who put that "i see the moaning lite" stuff on there because im pissed about it and he helped me wright it. The storey i mean, not the "i see the morning leight' shit

 

[DurtGurl]

No more stuff on my bottom

Well i found out how to get that 'i sea the moaning light' stuff off my bottom. You cant see it anymore because its not there because i remoaved it all my mysealf. ha ha
DG

 

[MathGirl]

There, there

Dear DurtGurl,
Settle down, dear. There's no "I see the morning light" at the bottom of your messages. I think you've just had a bad dream. It's going to be okay, so just relax.

I think you're just upset that your story hasn't been posted yet. Why don't you just relax and drink that other bottle of Ripple. I'm sure that will make you feel all better.
Motherly,
MG

 

[openthighs_sarah]

Maybe DurtGirl could take a swing at the General Board tonight... I'm really looking forward to when she hits 100 posts, so we can all see that bear pussy.

 

[Dirt Man]

Dear Durtgurl

With a name like yours, you're going to go places in here I'm sure. Welcome to the forum.

As Always
I Am the
Dirt Man

 

[MathGirl]

Durtey

DurtGurl is in bed for the night. A cool cloth on her fevered brow and a quart of Ripple in her bloodstream. She says she'll maintain a near lethal blood alcohol concentration until her story is posted.

MG

 

[sirhugs]

Re: Durtey

DurtGurl is in bed for the night. A cool cloth on her fevered brow and a quart of Ripple in her bloodstream. She says she'll maintain a near lethal blood alcohol concentration until her story is posted.

MG

well, lets hope she doesn't overdoses- I need at least one poster here whose typing is worse than mine.

 

[DurtGurl]

#$%^&#$^%&*!!

Dear All,
Shit Im devestated and pised both at the same time together. My first story was REGECTED!!!!!!!!!!! The reason givin was that some words ran to long and the speling was bad.

DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDdaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrnnnnnnnnnnn

Cant they take a joak?

Im gonna go get drunke.

DGG

 

[Pookie]

Re: #$%^&#$^%&*!!

Im gonna go get drunke.

DGG

Sweetie, you forgot the "r" at the end of "drunke".


Pookie

 

[DurtGurl]

Re: Re: #$%^&#$^%&*!!

Sweetie, you forgot the "r" at the end of "drunke"

Dear Pookee,
BRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrtttttttttttttttttttttttt
DG


http://www.eroticstories.com/my/story.php?id=17952

As lest somebody will publisch it.

DG

 

[MathGirl]

Re: Re: Re: #$%^&#$^%&*!!

http://www.eroticstories.com/my/story.php?id=17952
As lest somebody will publisch it.DG

Dear DG,
Don't despair, dear. Your art apparently does not meet the high standards of this site. Congratulations on finding a bottom feeding site which will publish almost anything.
MG

 

[pop_54]

Hello

Hello again DurtGurl how are you today.

I'm not going too fast for you am I, I'm typing slowly because I know you aren't too good at reading quickly.

Sorry to hear your story appears to have been shot to fuck by this site, some folks have no sense of humour, sorry I meant sense of style.

With your undoubted high levels of intellect and writing skills, I was wondering, had you'd thought of fairy stories as an alternative to the grown up porno stuff.

If you like I could help you to make a start, I actually have a fairy story I started a while back but haven't finished due to the complexity of such tales being beyond my talents.
If you like I could sign the first bit over to you and you could finish it as your own.

pops.............

 

[pop_54]

Hello again DG

Hello again DG darling, by the way MG was asking after you earlier on another thread.

Anyway love here's that Fairy tale I started on, maybe you could finish it and post it somewhere, Mars sounds like a good destination they're going there in a week or two.




Binkie the fairy was happy, very happy, 237th birthday, legal at last, so happy and chatting away to the world in general. “I can drink strong Berry juice and get merry, I can go of on trips alone, I can even get laid”.

Parreimore and Dinglebance two local Elves were passing the tree Binkie was sitting in.

“Wos Binkie on about Parrie, she fucked up in the ead or what?”

“Dunno Dingle, dippy tart, probably on somefink.”

“Oi Binkie, wos the occasion, why you so appy?”

“237 today Parriemore, 237 today, I’m legal at last, I can get married if I want now, I can get drunk now if I want, and hey you know what else.” Binkie replied with a huge grin, meaning take long trips to other lands alone, but the Elves took the phrase the wrong way.

“Hey Parrie, Binkie’s legal, I feel like a fuck, always fancied Binkie, ow about you?”

“Too bloody right mate, almost had a go at her a couple of years ago and fuck the law, pretty little number that one, cor I’d like to shag the ass off her.”

“Ere, less get her drunk and fuck her Parrie.”

“Yea, I’ll go get some apple juice from old Barnabyburtmangle, you keep her talking Dingle, and no shagging it before I gets back.”

“Naa wouldn’t do a dirty on my old mate like that, we’ll go two’s up with her, break it in properly like.”

“Hey Binkie, ow about a celebration drink then? Parrie’s gunna get some Apple Cider then we can all three of us have a nice birthday party for you.”

“Ohh Dinglebance that would be nice, can we, can we.” Binkie said excitedly.

“Yea darlin, you chat to old Dingle while I goes and gets the booze, then we’ll all get fucked out of our heads.”

Oh Parriemore you are crude, but I like you.” Binkie whispered with a blush.

Parriemore set off for the local Off Licence to buy the strong juice; Dinglebance joined Binkie in the tree.

“Lovely birthday dress darlin, like you’ve got on, nice and short ennit hey, Mmm nice legs on you Binkie.” Dinglebance whispered as he positioned himself alongside the fairy leering at Binkie’s nice shapely legs.

“Oh Dinglebance don’t be so forward, I’ve only just turned legal, you’ll make me blush.” Binkie replied with a wicked little grin.

“Call me Dingle Binkie, all my friends do, we’re gunna be friends aint we darlin.”

“I hope we can be good friends Dingle, I like Elves I’ve heard things about you Elves.”

“Wot nice things like Binkie darlin?”

“Well I mustn’t be naughty and forward must I?” Binkie teased and giggled.

Dinglebance grinned, he thought he knew what Binkie meant, Elves did have a reputation for that, and it was true, ‘Ohhhh I’m gunna fuck you in every hole you got.’ Dingle thought as he studied Binkie’s lovely legs and nice protruding little tits.
He visualised the little fairy naked and his cock began to stiffen quite a bit.

Parriemore suddenly re-appeared with a huge bottle of Cider under his arm, “Come on down out of that tree you two, I aint getting pissed up in a fuckin tree, too fuckin dangerous”. He cried up to them.

Binkie spread them, her wings that is, and fluttered down from the tree with ease.
Dingle began the climb down, he was having some difficulty; Elves you see have a problem, the problem being a disproportionately large penile member compared with their body size, Dingle had a raging bone-on and his oversized weapon was causing him problems with his descent from the tree.

The average elf around that area was about 2 ft 4ins tall, the average elf cock size being about 6 to 7ins this meant a large proportion of their body size was made up of prick, and when erect said prick tended to cause all manner of problems with ease of movement. It also caused a lot of elves to pass out momentarily with lack of blood to the brain should they become very sexually aroused and said prick elevate very rapidly.

Dingle was feeling a bit light headed and the swollen cock lump in his tight trousers kept catching on twigs and branches, it also prevented him from bending about freely.
As he neared the ground the little elf lost his grip and fell to Earth with a thump.

“Ughh bollocks, fuck that urt”.

“You alright Dingle love, here let me help you”. Binkie chuckled as she flew over to Dingle, she couldn’t help laughing at the little chap as he lay face down rocking from side to side his huge hard prick lump acting like a rocking horse skid beneath him.

“Get up you daft bastard, let’s get on with the party I’m gagging for it, a drink like”. Parriemore urged his friend whilst studying Binkies pretty young arse cheeks that were exposed as she bent to help Dinglebance up from the ground.

“Ah come on then let’s do it, I’m fuckin gagging for it now as well”. Dingle said as he rubbed his aching cock lump to comfort said item after the fall.
Parriemore was also rubbing his hard member in his trousers, but this had nothing to do with any injury but all to do with the memory of Binkie’s plump young arse cheeks and tight pink panties.