Which Book Should I Buy?
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le_kinklet
Literotica Guru
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RE: Books
"The Story of O" is a good one, but i am not sure of the author!!
"The Story of O" is a good one, but i am not sure of the author!!
Johnny Mayberry
Golden Boy
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"Ethel the Aardvark Goes Quantity Surveying"
WriterDom
Good to the last drop
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Different Loving is filled with testimonials about people interested in various kinks. Parts are interesting, but if you looking for useful info, then don't buy it.
"The Loving Dominant" is worth a read. "Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns" is also a good introduction book."The Topping Book" and "The Bottoming Book" are both good. I believe they both have been expanded in the past few years, but I haven't read the updated versions.
Don't think I've read 101.
"The Loving Dominant" is worth a read. "Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns" is also a good introduction book."The Topping Book" and "The Bottoming Book" are both good. I believe they both have been expanded in the past few years, but I haven't read the updated versions.
Don't think I've read 101.
Netzach
>semiotics?
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LMAO...good one Johnny.
If you have to ask everyone which book that's been countlessly touted by everyone to get, I have to wonder.
Here's a scary thought. People should read some basic anatomy and psych stuff, maybe a few articles on endorphins, a book on the stockholm syndrome, a book on persuasive rhetoric, a whole bunch of things that might teach you some techniques and things to think about that aren't necessarily labeled "SM for dummies"
It requires making a few conceptual leaps, but it's possible that it might work. Shit, once upon a time there were NO how-to manuals or SM gurus touring the states, what the hell did people do?
Found local mentors, taught each other, and tried stuff out. Huh.
If you have to ask everyone which book that's been countlessly touted by everyone to get, I have to wonder.
Here's a scary thought. People should read some basic anatomy and psych stuff, maybe a few articles on endorphins, a book on the stockholm syndrome, a book on persuasive rhetoric, a whole bunch of things that might teach you some techniques and things to think about that aren't necessarily labeled "SM for dummies"
It requires making a few conceptual leaps, but it's possible that it might work. Shit, once upon a time there were NO how-to manuals or SM gurus touring the states, what the hell did people do?
Found local mentors, taught each other, and tried stuff out. Huh.
da grunt
Literotica Guru
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It seems you desire a book addressing your interests, but we don't know what you've read. I guess for me, the story of o really fixated me. Diary of a Flea is dang hot! I've not read the books you've mentioned, but for what piqued my fixation, and what classically must be called sm101, try desade's Justine, the perils of a woman of virtue.
SierraMoon
Being me
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i've read both "The Loving Dominant" and "Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns".... found them to both be very informative.... 
WriterDom
Good to the last drop
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Netzach said:
A Ph.D. in Psychology along with a 10 year internship with Uday and Qusay would be helpful also. Along with direct lineage to
Marquis de Sade.
If all that fails, reading a book wouldn't hurt anyone. A local mentor would be great, but not always available.
G
Guest
Guest
Books??????
Hmmmm Books........
I dunno - I read 'Diary of a Flea' and assorted others, when I was about fourteen. Someone thought they had them hidden better than they really did. That probably started me on my current path of joyful perversion.
After being in BDsM for a while I saw the Topping and Bottoming books and was rather impressed.
Suggestions:
Play poker - learn how to read the other person.
Buy a couple of good tool user books - It IS cheaper and easier to make your own goodies.
Buy Rice - then shitcan as soon as possible (preferrably in the store, in view of the silly ass goth checkout girl)
Read Justine and 'O'
Learn all you can about the human body, and the psychology involved. It is helpful in more ways than you think.
Find a copy of the "Boy Scout Handbook" nothing is sadder than a proto Dom that can't tie knots. (seen it - Jeeze)
And for a bit of 'tude - Read the novels written by S.M. Sterling Having to do with the Draka - Note: this is not an endorsement of the philosophies espoused by this fictional society.
EKVITKAR
Hmmmm Books........
I dunno - I read 'Diary of a Flea' and assorted others, when I was about fourteen. Someone thought they had them hidden better than they really did. That probably started me on my current path of joyful perversion.
After being in BDsM for a while I saw the Topping and Bottoming books and was rather impressed.
Suggestions:
Play poker - learn how to read the other person.
Buy a couple of good tool user books - It IS cheaper and easier to make your own goodies.
Buy Rice - then shitcan as soon as possible (preferrably in the store, in view of the silly ass goth checkout girl)
Read Justine and 'O'
Learn all you can about the human body, and the psychology involved. It is helpful in more ways than you think.
Find a copy of the "Boy Scout Handbook" nothing is sadder than a proto Dom that can't tie knots. (seen it - Jeeze)
And for a bit of 'tude - Read the novels written by S.M. Sterling Having to do with the Draka - Note: this is not an endorsement of the philosophies espoused by this fictional society.
EKVITKAR
Netzach
>semiotics?
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I like the poker playing suggestion.
The more experience you have with subtext the better.
I disagree about the knots though. I can affix a person to a thing beautifully and I always wind up tying granny knots or a series of about six half-hitches for a grand quick-release thingie.
I learned to do that from my bottom, who used to take turns tying up his equally as submissive ex girlfriend. Mentors are all over the place, really.
All of the books mentioned are perfectly fine references as introduction. I prefer the drier wit of Warren to the goofy puns of Miller and Devon, it's all similar info presented in different ways and it's all pretty good and common sense.
I do like the way that Miller and Devon deal with subspace, which doesn't get described as in-depth in some other books. That's the magic in what we do, it's the thing that makes really no sense to someone who's not experienced it, and 90% of scenes gone bad, in my experience, have to do with a Top forgetting how vulnerable, precarious, and intense a space that is for the bottom.
This can also be learned from talking to a lot of bottoms, or reading the internet postings of a lot of bottoms on a subject like...oh...subspace.
Fiction is not good as a how-to guide. However it presents relationship paradigms to us. Some don't resonate some do. GOR resonates with a whole lot of people out there, but not me. The equally as intense M/s dynamic in Mr. Benson is more meaningful to me, whereas my partner sees retro gay leathermen with mustaches and uncut dicks and laughs his head off....it's all personal. It does what fiction does, it tickles our imaginations, it taps our desires. I don't find it reliable as a hard and fast road map, but I do find it useful in learning about what you'd like, and what you like about what you like.
The more experience you have with subtext the better.
I disagree about the knots though. I can affix a person to a thing beautifully and I always wind up tying granny knots or a series of about six half-hitches for a grand quick-release thingie.
I learned to do that from my bottom, who used to take turns tying up his equally as submissive ex girlfriend. Mentors are all over the place, really.
All of the books mentioned are perfectly fine references as introduction. I prefer the drier wit of Warren to the goofy puns of Miller and Devon, it's all similar info presented in different ways and it's all pretty good and common sense.
I do like the way that Miller and Devon deal with subspace, which doesn't get described as in-depth in some other books. That's the magic in what we do, it's the thing that makes really no sense to someone who's not experienced it, and 90% of scenes gone bad, in my experience, have to do with a Top forgetting how vulnerable, precarious, and intense a space that is for the bottom.
This can also be learned from talking to a lot of bottoms, or reading the internet postings of a lot of bottoms on a subject like...oh...subspace.
Fiction is not good as a how-to guide. However it presents relationship paradigms to us. Some don't resonate some do. GOR resonates with a whole lot of people out there, but not me. The equally as intense M/s dynamic in Mr. Benson is more meaningful to me, whereas my partner sees retro gay leathermen with mustaches and uncut dicks and laughs his head off....it's all personal. It does what fiction does, it tickles our imaginations, it taps our desires. I don't find it reliable as a hard and fast road map, but I do find it useful in learning about what you'd like, and what you like about what you like.
Last edited:
Daedalus77
Literotica Guru
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I like "Screw the Roses". It is light hearted and gives advice but suggests you find your own way.
catalina_francisco
Happily insatiable always
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SM for dummies
I like the suggestion of SM for dummies, I think we should all pull together and write it .
But if I would have to advice one book it would have to SM 101.
Francisco.
I like the suggestion of SM for dummies, I think we should all pull together and write it .
But if I would have to advice one book it would have to SM 101.
Francisco.
Ebonyfire
Ball Stretcher
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- Jan 6, 2002
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Maledoms vs. Femdoms
I did have SM 101 first, and I give it to others as gifts, but I personally found Different Loving more helpful to Me as a Femdom.
It discusses the problems relating to male submissives and female dominants very well.
It helped me formulate my requirements for male sub behaviour.
I did have SM 101 first, and I give it to others as gifts, but I personally found Different Loving more helpful to Me as a Femdom.
It discusses the problems relating to male submissives and female dominants very well.
It helped me formulate my requirements for male sub behaviour.
catalina_francisco
Happily insatiable always
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- Jul 29, 2002
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Personally, after finding it on the get together weekend, my favourite has become The Bullwhip Book. Small, but full of useful details, instructions, and expertise, all delivered with a spattering of humour.....and hey, it seems I was a clever girl to have the kangaroo leather bullwhip made on my last visit home to Oz...is the recommended ultimate whip in size, place of origin, leather type, and design...yah, now to keep submitting with pleasure as his practice target!!!
Catalina
Catalina
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