Where did my Trolls go?

[MyNecroticSnail]

What was my score? 4.33 or something.
Well on to addressing the real comments:

Forest reverie
by MyNecroticSnail ©
As shadows narrow I escape the glen
as hollow as when I came in.

This is a lovely poem. At first, I didn't notice the form. Sestet? Help me--I'm rusty on forms. For me, this is one of the best MNS poems I've read in awhile. Only six lines, so take the time to read it, please. And comment. It truly deserves better than what I can give it.

----------

you know goddamn well it's just a quatrain with two extra lines, and really you deserve some credit for it, along with Empson

and a comment from Tathagata:

Not crazy

about " fecund"...but that last line is perfect.
Nice work

Tathagata, your reaction is nicer than two others I showed it to. Fecund made them puke. Close to what I wanted. A speed bump.

This air. Cool on dry body. This breathing skin.
As a turtle ascends to the sun from the stream,
in a breeze, I reawake to fecund dream
of childhood; that time, with love, made thin.

As shadows narrow I escape the glen
as hollow as when I came in.

a pastoral demolition

I had a few good lines that were heading in a pastoral, metaphysical direction and I decided to do an 180 midstream. Line four I hoped could be so ambigious that a reading of with love could be bitter and sarcastic.

What you see is not what you get.

as far as the last line being perfect, probably not, but it was the best I could do at this time.

Despite me missing the boat, so to speak I thank you that left comments.

If any of you so-called crunchers and bashers wish to take a crack addict, it would be greatly appreciated. I will NOT accept any cheap PYSCH interps, however. All poetry is fiction. Laughs.

 

[WickedEve]

you know goddamn well it's just a quatrain with two extra lines, and really you deserve some credit for it, along with Empson

Okay. I thought it was something more. Still like the poem.

 

[TheRainMan]

What was my score? 4.33 or something.
Well on to addressing the real comments:


you know goddamn well it's just a quatrain with two extra lines, and really you deserve some credit for it, along with Empson

and a comment from Tathagata:

Not crazy

about " fecund"...but that last line is perfect.
Nice work

Tathagata, your reaction is nicer than two others I showed it to. Fecund made them puke. Close to what I wanted. A speed bump.

This air. Cool on dry body. This breathing skin.
As a turtle ascends to the sun from the stream,
in a breeze, I reawake to fecund dream
of childhood; that time, with love, made thin.

As shadows narrow I escape the glen
as hollow as when I came in.

a pastoral demolition

I had a few good lines that were heading in a pastoral, metaphysical direction and I decided to do an 180 midstream. Line four I hoped could be so ambigious that a reading of with love could be bitter and sarcastic.

What you see is not what you get.

as far as the last line being perfect, probably not, but it was the best I could do at this time.

Despite me missing the boat, so to speak I thank you that left comments.

If any of you so-called crunchers and bashers wish to take a crack addict, it would be greatly appreciated. I will NOT accept any cheap PYSCH interps, however. All poetry is fiction. Laughs.

it's a good poem, Snail. the ending is superb.

i don't like 'fecund' much either, nor the absence of an article before it. that, more than the word itself, made me cringe.

i think your trolls are napping, dreaming in forced rhymes . . . they'll be back.

 

[J.Doe]

What was my score? 4.33 or something.

What's worse than troll attention is no attention.

 

[vampiredust]

all the trolls are out drunk tonight

expect some Fibonacci scoring in the morning

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

Okay. I thought it was something more. Still like the poem.

I like you. And I like your poetry. I wish I had a log. Serious, you do deserve some credit for it, you and Conrad Dimple. And Empson. Your poetry has a chatoyant quality that I tried to emulate here.

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

What's worse than troll attention is no attention.

Good point.

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

it's a good poem, Snail. the ending is superb.

i don't like 'fecund' much either, nor the absence of an article before it. that, more than the word itself, made me cringe.

i think your trolls are napping, dreaming in forced rhymes . . . they'll be back.

Really, I think "fecund" has to be one of the ten most horrible words in the english languauge. Even "taxes" rates higher. If I could figure out how to use both words....
Oh, Oh, article-less. It was a plural, neglect of proper edit. Rethinking line three. Rethinking, too abrupt cut off on the road not taken, also. Thanks TRM.

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

all the trolls are out drunk tonight

expect some Fibonacci scoring in the morning

fecund
taxes
and
Fibonacci scoring

Now that sounds like a challenge

I'm sure there are three or four here that would come up with something good -

make me look totally lame in comparison

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

What was my score? 4.33 or something.

persistent fucker, I dropped to 4.00 without a comment. Now who would have done that, who was here, last night?

Well, I made some dubious progress, I've been 5 bombed also

Back to real comments, I was left with two average scores on my submissions with names attached. Hmm, both had valid points. I could contact them, if I wanted, I didn't thank 'em, I do so here.

Somehow, I feel the ending could have been better, but it's not bad. Laughs.

 

[FifthFlower]

i read your 10 poems
but was afraid to comment
or even rate them ~
i didn't want to be called
a troll if i didn't like them

or a moron if i did

last time i rated someone i
got a couple emails from the guy ~
safer to stay in my snail shell

i think you need a hug

that corn cob, like, which orifice
did you use? must have hurt ~
i'll bet it hurt

did snow white become rose red
when dopey gave her the diamond?
did you give that bobble-head one of your books
from the top shelf?

i think you need a hug

that guy that said you were an
april fools joke just didn't get it

you do know Davey was cheating
when he came in with the sling shot?
i feel sorry for the pig

i think you need a hug

at first i thought necrotic meant neurotic
then i looked it up ~ duh, i still don't know
what it means

hugs kisses

i'll keep reading yours if you don't get
mad at me ~ i'm like snow white ~
afraid to become rose red

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

i read your 10 poems
but was afraid to comment
or even rate them ~
i didn't want to be called
a troll if i didn't like them

or a moron if i did

last time i rated someone i
got a couple emails from the guy ~
safer to stay in my snail shell

i think you need a hug

You comment, leave a name, it is your reaction, it is valid, it is your take on what is written. I may take issue with it. Mostly I don't. It is supposed to be feedback and discussion. Not a blind H-ville. (that is what the morons want) and thanks for the hug.

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

persistent fucker, I dropped to 4.00 without a comment. Now who would have done that, who was here, last night?

Well, I made some dubious progress, I've been 5 bombed also

Back to real comments, I was left with two average scores on my submissions with names attached. Hmm, both had valid points. I could contact them, if I wanted, I didn't thank 'em, I do so here.

Somehow, I feel the ending could have been better, but it's not bad. Laughs.

well the score dropped to 3.83 without any further comments, looks like the mama's boy brought in some reinforcements.

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

well the score dropped to 3.83 without any further comments, looks like the mama's boy brought in some reinforcements.

Dang~

I ain't been gone that long and the trolls run rampant? <grin
I have been here long enough now that I have seen them come and go, it seems to be a personality explosion in a negative vent. Perhaps they just got off the phone with their ex's new lover and just happen to read your poem. You wound up with the anger they really meant to relay to their ex. I see a negative comment I try and counter it with a positive remark to balance out the trolls action. Of course when a poem has three great comments and one negative it stands to reason that person has a problem deeper than you and I can repair. So, as maria did, it is best to not scoop to that level BY trying to converse/argue with someone that does not see it the same way you do.

I like what neo said, I don't know if there is a need for such negative remarks as much as they are like flys at a picnic, you can expect them to show up <grin Then there are the ones that can not leave a comment without adding 'adjectives' in their verbal excitement that shows their negative views of life in general.

I saw one of these trolls the other day. I was driving to the hospital down towards the big shitty/city and this moron crossed three lanes of freeway with out looking, damn near causeing several collisions while flipping every one the middle finger while weaving in and out of traffic. I got a look at this person and the word 'TROLL' is the only way I can describe them <grin

as you can see Lebroz, we can play Archival re-tree vile , this is a classic
I don't know if there is a need for such negative remarks when a anonomous low score works just as well
speaking of trees: did anyone notice there are none in
Forest reverie
by MyNecroticSnail ©
maybe one limb, the turtle had to crawl up on something
one leave (escape)
it's about "getting it" - what was it Senna said about people leaving, and you bravely pull up things from the past, without comment. Most of these people are beyond you, and it seems very selective, not to as to quality, but something else - 10% of the people will thank you regardless of the quality of the comment, I found that out when I left the <enjoin the rite comments and five bombed everyone last year. What else did I find out? And you play duck and cover.
Come to think of it not much "reverie" either. The Rainman and T where right about "fecund", it should have been "fecunded". Google it. It is so not what it seems to be.
Feel free to leave a comment, Human, all too Human, perhaps.

Comments, Feedback and Discussion, let's not forget Poetry. Go out on that limb, Or do wish to play the H parade and Mr. Fixit?

 

[FifthFlower]

You comment, leave a name, it is your reaction, it is valid, it is your take on what is written. I may take issue with it. Mostly I don't. It is supposed to be feedback and discussion. Not a blind H-ville. (that is what the morons want) and thanks for the hug.

Since you didn't get mad at me, I commented on all of your poems. The comments will not be brilliant, in fact they are likely lame, but I gave you a 10. So for a brief moment the trolls are held back.

I don't read the comments on my poems, so don't bother commenting on mine. Just write more of your own.

 

[WickedEve]

Since you didn't get mad at me, I commented on all of your poems. The comments will not be brilliant, in fact they are likely lame, but I gave you a 10. So for a brief moment the trolls are held back.

I don't read the comments on my poems, so don't bother commenting on mine. Just write more of your own.

I hope you really do read your comments. It appears you have quite a few good ones.

 

[Tzara]

I don't read the comments on my poems, so don't bother commenting on mine.

I'm curious. If you don't read the comments, why do you even have them turned on? You have to explicitly enable them--they are not the default when you submit a poem.

Pardon me that I obviously don't understand your motivations, but to me that just seems strange, even perverse. Though this is a porn site, so perverse is probably good.

 

[FifthFlower]

I'm curious. If you don't read the comments, why do you even have them turned on?

I was going to turn them off. I said to myself why should I waste someone's time? I even mentioned that in a thread somewhere, and LeBroz wrote something that changed my mind. He basically said that he would like the option of leaving a comment and would be annoyed with a writer who did not allow the reader to talk back. I agreed.

So, that's why I leave them turned on. However, if you want to say something to me that is the least likely way to get my attention. The best way is to write a poem in the forum. I do read a lot of them.

 

[MyNecroticSnail]

the ending is superb.

I guess it was

i don't like 'fecund' much either, nor the absence of an article before it. that, more than the word itself, made me cringe.

Pat,
you can take that up with the people that use "fecund'", but not the way I used it. Imagine how Agent Orange I could have made it, if I had spent more than an hour on it.


LOL
as they say in poster land.