When Silence is Deafening

[lavender]

 

[Svedish_Chef]

I enjoy that silence... I just dont have the other to share it with.

 

[TN_Vixen]

(a.k.a. small Geo or Ford Echo) with about a dozen overly large woofers.

I'm partial to overy large woofers

 

[MorgaineLaFay]

ditto

 

[Guest]

 

[Ice Cold]

I'm more comfortable with the former. Sometimes when we are together we don't say a word, just enjoy the quiet and knowing the other is there doing there own thing. It gives me a sense of comfort. It is a different feeling to do the same activity, and that person is not around. Almost like something vital is missing.

 

[perks]

Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence

In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
'Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turn my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never shared
No one dared
Disturb the sound of silence

"Fools," said I, "you do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you"
But my words like silent raindrops fell
And echoed in the wells of silence

And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said "The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls
And whispered in the sound of silence

 

[Laurel]

Re: Re: When Silence is Deafening

I'm partial to overy large woofers

I love your overly large woofers.

 

[tigerjen]

For me, silence sometimes can be a good thing, when I'm
by myself.......but if there is another person or more with
me, I can't stand silence unless its appropriate for the
situation..........

 

[lavender]

 

[Cheyenne]

So who isn't talking to you? Just post the name already and we'll all gang up on him/her for you. Maybe. Well, probably not. But tell us anyway.

 

[lavender]

 

[Svedish_Chef]

It's all my fault

 

[Nomad4112000]

It makes you want to SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hear you Lav just after my 1st wife left I closed my self to the world and shut everybody out. There where time I almost went mad. But then I realized 1 day that I wasn't so bad and used the silence to learn more about myself. I was a life giving experience.

 

[APhil]

Sometimes.....

A lot of my relationships have ended badly because I was enjoying the silence between myself and my SO.... on the phone.

 

[Cheyenne]

I don't post passive aggressive shit on the board. This has to do with RL.

But are you doing the passive aggressive shit in RL then instead? Have you told this person the silence is upsetting you, or you just posted the news here instead?

Of course, maybe you didn't want suggested solutions but just wanted to vent. That's okay, too.

 

[erosman]

Lawrence Durrell in 'Justine', last paragraph:

"Soon it will be evening and the clear night sky will be dusted thickly with summer stars. I shall be here, as always, smoking by the water. I have decided to leave Clea's last letter unanswered. I no longer wish to coerce anyone, to make promises, to think of life in terms of compacts, resolutions, covenants. It will be up to Clea to interpret my silence according to her own needs and desires, to come to me if she has need or not, as the case may be. Does not everything depend on our interpretation of the silence around us?"


What's your interpretation?

 

[HotXBunz]

I got into a heated political debate with a friend of almost 30 years. She stopped calling and changed her email addy. The silence is deafening.

I very much want to contact her but feel like I would be disrespecting her desire not to have contact with me. The more time that passes the angrier I feel. I have thought about writing her but really do not know what to say. I do not feel I owe her an apology for my opinions and do not feel she should apologize for hers. I am willing to agree to disagree and told her so before she cut off communication. It has been seven months now.

All of it feels very third grade. The passive aggressive silence just pisses me off. She could call me and tell me to get fucked and that she never wants to talk to me again and I would have more respect for her. In her silence she is speaking volumes. The more time that goes by the more I wonder if I even want her in my life again. I have rehearsed a hundred letters in my mind and I keep coming up with the fact she does not want to hear from me or she would not have changed her email address and not let me know the new one. I am not taking this well at all. To complicate things she has several very expensive things that belong to me. I guess a letter to her would be in order but what do I say, hey I want my stuff back? That would just make it more difficult to mend the fences in my opinion. I do not even know if there are fences to mend.


My partner and I enjoy silence but never use it as a punishment. I definitely feel like it is a power play on her part. I told her in my last post to her I wanted to see her and the silent treatment is what I got in return. She lives about three hours from me.

Thanks for letting me rant.

 

[Cheyenne]

I got into a heated political debate with a friend of almost 30 years. She stopped calling and changed her email addy. The silence is deafening.

She's been a friend for 30 years but you don't know her phone number? Why can't you call her vs. her having to call you?

 

[Marxist]

But are you doing the passive aggressive shit in RL then instead? Have you told this person the silence is upsetting you, or you just posted the news here instead?

Of course, maybe you didn't want suggested solutions but just wanted to vent. That's okay, too.

Cheyenne you nitwit you nailed it and then some.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Re: Re: Re: When Silence is Deafening

I love your overly large woofers.

You say the sweetest things.

 

[HotXBunz]

Cheyenne, that is the real kicker. She had just moved from the left coast to the east weeks before our encounter. All I had was her cell phone number and a P.O. Box. She has changed her cell number and her home is unlisted. I am really bummed about the whole thing. I do not even have her address or I would just barge in on her. I have even tried tracking her through eBay. She changed her user name.

Our dynamic changed radically when she moved close. I don't know what happened but things were different. I was not as comforable around her. She was very judgemental of my life. Strange things like me having grown kids that I get along with and a spouse that adores me. She would say things like "I'm glad I don't have the hassels you have with having to be there for everyone. I like being single and unattached. How do you stand it?" I thought that was what life was all about, making long lasting attachments. She was even critical of my decorating style. "Too fru fru." It was very strange and painful to have the comfort zone gone. Online and over the phone we shared every secret and played. In person she was very very different.

 

[Cheyenne]

Online and over the phone we shared every secret and played. In person she was very very different.

I thought you'd said you'd been friends for 30 years. In all that time, you only talked on the phone and played online? How did you meet in the first place and not actually see each other? There was no "online" 30 years ago...

 

[lavender]

 

[Cheyenne]

Cheyenne -

Maybe you should read his post more carefully, particularly the last sentence.

Lavender, maybe you should read HER posts more carefully.

My summary so far (I think): they have been girlfriends for 30 years, although one lived on the west coast and HotXBunz on the east (gulf coast.) When the one on the west (left) coast moved closer, they actually were able to see each other in person being only 3 hours away. The west coaster it seems doesn't approve of HotXBunz family or decorating skills, not to mention political views, and has cut off all contact with HotzBunz.

Now, it is one thing to have a great friend online and by phone who turns out to be someone you don't really care for when you first meet in person. Shit happens. But the story as presented about a 30 year friendship gone bad doesn't make sense to me.

Lavy, you may continue your posts criticizing my posts' contents, style, and timing if you'd like. But I won't be changing anything about me for you. My suggestion is that if you don't like my posts as they are, save yourself some future irritation and just don't read them.