When life hands you lemons...

simply_subbie

Literotica Guru
Joined
Jul 10, 2007
Posts
2,604
make lemonade.

I know the playground used to have a thread for saying, quotes, proverbs and such, but it is most decidedly MIA.

I love these thought provoking little pearls of wisdom or uplifting sayings that can bring about a laugh.

So if you have any, I'd love to hear them.


Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. - James M. Barrie
 
I always say if life hands you lemons, squirt the juice in the eyes of your enemies...but I'm strange.

"If Wishes were Fishes, no one would starve."
 
If 'ifs and ands' were pots and pans there'd be no need for tinkers. :)
 
life and laughter

My personal motto is: Laugh at life before it laughs at you.

My grandfather also said: "What are you afraid of, you only die once?"
 
Some strange ones I've heard:

"Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it."

"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself"
 
Two sayings my grandfather taught me:

"In anything you do, it's better to do it slow and do it right... than to do it fast, then have to do it all over again."

"The hurrier you go, the behinder you get"
 
"If wit was shit you`d be constipated" is one my mum was always using on me and my sister when we lived at home and gave a bit of sarcastic backchat. I hope never to quote that to my lad who is currently 2 and a half. He`s a good lad, I dont think it`ll ever be necessary :)
 
There is something to be said at how quickly a dog makes friends in comparison to a human.
 
"A man who thinks too much about his ancestors is like a potato — the best part of him is underground"
 
Sex is like Bridge, If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand....Mae West
 
Tis better to stay silent and be considered a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
 
“It’s erotic if you’re using a feather. It’s kinky if you’re using the whole damn chicken.”
 
Success does not consist in never making blunders, but in never making the same one a second time.
 
To the world you may be just person; but to one person you may be the world.
 
g'nothi s'auton - Know thy self
— inscription on the wall of the temple at Delphi
 
An old Scottish saying:

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice... shame on me."
 
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