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when i die, just throw my body behind a crematorium in Georgia and let it rot

Problem Child

Problem Child

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Joined
Feb 21, 2001
Posts
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Let some fucking redneck yokel collect the payments for my cremation while I rot in the hot Georgia sun and vultures peck my eyeballs out and my skin tightens as my body fills with the putrid gases of decay.

I won't care, cuz I'm fucking dead, right?
 
Long as its not near my house, that might attract some flies...
LOL

blaze
 
Laurel said:
Can I have your shoes?
Click to expand...

Yeah, but be careful when you pull it off, my rotten leg might come right with it, then you'd have to flip up your swivel head to barf.
 
Problem Child said:
Yeah, but be careful when you pull it off, my rotten leg might come right with it, then you'd have to flip up your swivel head to barf.
Click to expand...

Crap, you're right. Maybe you'd better mail them to me now instead.
 
so PC... i hear you have a nice stereo and i was wondering.....

;)
 
Yeah but you are gonna have to pay the vultures, even they have their limits :D
 
Laurel said:


So you say. I'll hang around, just in case.
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Actually I think it was Eric Idle. I'm wearing size 11 mens UGG boots, you want them? They don't even stink much. Well, not as bad as my sunpoached body will, anyway.
 
Problem Child said:
Actually I think it was Eric Idle. I'm wearing size 11 mens UGG boots, you want them? They don't even stink much. Well, not as bad as my sunpoached body will, anyway.
Click to expand...

Sure. If I put on 12 pairs of socks, they should fit like a dream.
 
Laurel said:


Sure. If I put on 12 pairs of socks, they should fit like a dream.
Click to expand...

How do you manage to stand up on Barbie feet with those huge pendulous milk-filled breasts?
 
Problem Child said:
How do you manage to stand up on Barbie feet with those huge pendulous milk-filled breasts?
Click to expand...

Ah, that's a trade secret. If I tell you, then I'll have to kill you. THEN I'll get your shoes.
 
Size 11 mens ugg boots?


I'll walk over your corpse and take the rotting leg as well if i have to.
I mean shit,ya know how hard it is to get a pair of Ugg boots Mid Summer?
 
AusTess said:
Size 11 mens ugg boots?


I'll walk over your corpse and take the rotting leg as well if i have to.
I mean shit,ya know how hard it is to get a pair of Ugg boots Mid Summer?
Click to expand...

Yeah, you'll have to pry em out of my cold dead fingers, baby. As well as off his rotten dead leg.

How about we flip him for it. If it's heads, you win. lol
 
He wont flip right though,having one leg ripped from its socket,he'll be off balance.
You can have the ugg boots.


I need a watch.
Is he wearing a watch?
 
AusTess said:
He wont flip right though,having one leg ripped from its socket,he'll be off balance.
You can have the ugg boots.


I need a watch.
Is he wearing a watch?
Click to expand...

Yeah, I got a watch, it's a casio G-shock. If you want it, just rip my hand off, since that's easier than unbuckling the strap.
 
Of course.


rigor mortis has set in?
I mean,a girl can ALWAYS use another hand around the house.
And when i've finished with it,I'll feed it to the dog.

I mean,You are dead,whats it matter to you?
 
AusTess said:
Of course.


rigor mortis has set in?
I mean,a girl can ALWAYS use another hand around the house.
And when i've finished with it,I'll feed it to the dog.

I mean,You are dead,whats it matter to you?
Click to expand...

Doesn't mean shit to me, I mean I'm dead as a doornail. I'd gladly give up my hand to keep a damn dog alive for another day.

It's not one of those stupid dingos, is it?
 
This reminds me of the term "gump"

It's what oozes out of the pussy of a larger dead woman after she has been wrapped in black garbage backs sitting on top of a Southern 30-story roof for months after she is pushed off and her body hits the ground.

Gotta love 7th grade humor.
 
No,it aint.
It's a staffy,cute lil flea bittn bitch that she is.
My husbands father owned a dingo though.
They always look half starved.
Weird.



Can we get back to talking about putrid gasses?
 
AusTess said:
No,it aint.
It's a staffy,cute lil flea bittn bitch that she is.
My husbands father owned a dingo though.
They always look half starved.
Weird.



Can we get back to talking about putrid gasses?
Click to expand...

They'll get that way if'n you don't give em enough human body parts.
 
Yeah yeah.
I read the gump thingie.*Shrugs*
I was supposed to be impressed?
I dont have a very good sense of humour.


The dingo was well fed.

Sometimes he'd come home from a wander,all bloated like he'd eaten a small child.

Weird.
 
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