When does Desire become Obsession?

sterculius

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I have been married to my wife for more than forty years, and I recently admitted to her that ever since I was a teenager, I have been an eager and enthusiastic closet cocksucker. She was shocked at first, but has ultimately come to accept that this is what I truly am. I left her with the impression that I no longer suck cock, but in reality, I actually still do suck cock whenever the opportunity arises.

Sucking cock has always been my favorite sexual activity, and when I'm not actually sucking cock, I'm usually thinking about sucking cock or watching blowjob porn.

My wife has occasionally noticed me surfing the web for blowjob porn and is of the opinion that my interest in giving men blowjobs borders on excessive.

My wife's sex drive has always been less intense than mine and she doesn't share my passion for sucking cock.

My desire for performing fellatio doesn't prevent me from carrying out my normal daily duties, I just dream about doing it most of the time.

My question is this; At what point does desire become obsession?
 
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When your desires are fulfilled then the word obsession is redundant in my opinion. I feel that an obsession always exists until desires are taken up and carried out.
 
Desire is the want to do something and enjoy it when the opportunity presents.
You control it.

Obsession is when it controls you rather than you controlling it.

When you can neither think nor WANT to think of anything else.

When you engineer everything else in your day to allow you to fulfil your obsession.

When you can no longer complete everyday chores and jobs of work because of it.

When you get in a foul mood when you're prevented from indulging your obsession.

And when you literally don't want to do and have no interest in absolutely anything else.

For those of us with addictive and obsessive personality types (and I'm not just talking sex stuff here), it's a very easy line to define as we live the dichotomy every single day.
 
I have been married to my wife for more than forty years, and I recently admitted to her that ever since I was a teenager, I have been an eager and enthusiastic closet cocksucker. She was shocked at first, but has ultimately come to accept that this is what I truly am. I left her with the impression that I no longer suck cock, but in reality, I actually still do suck cock whenever the opportunity arises.

Sucking cock has always been my favorite sexual activity, and when I'm not actually sucking cock, I'm usually thinking about sucking cock or watching blowjob porn.

My wife has occasionally noticed me surfing the web for blowjob porn and is of the opinion that my interest in giving men blowjobs borders on excessive.

My wife's sex drive has always been less intense than mine and she doesn't share my passion for sucking cock.

My desire for performing fellatio doesn't prevent me from carrying out my normal daily duties, I just dream about doing it most of the time.

My question is this; At what point does desire become obsession?
A desire becomes an obsession when you can't get enough of what you desire. Like me wanting a cock in my ass constantly. Sadly, my cardiologist says that my heart can't take the excitement since my recent heart attack.
 
I started out fantasizing that my wife would fuck her older brother.

Now, I can't cum unless while I'm fucking her, I imagine that she JUST fucked him, and all the liquid inside her pussy is his cum. That's obsession.
 
I left her with the impression that I no longer suck cock, but in reality, I actually still do suck cock whenever the opportunity arises.

If you are looking for an opinion on whether your situation falls under desire or obsession: I think you have an obsession.

and when I'm not actually sucking cock, I'm usually thinking about sucking cock or watching blowjob porn.

You say that your wife has noticed how much porn you watch that is cock-sucking related. I don’t know about anyone else in this forum but I’ve never caught my partner watching porn. Of the women that I know who have caught their partners: those men has sex additions and either put their partner in some uncomfortable and compromising positions or stepped out on their wives quite a bit.

You say it doesn’t interfere with your day to day life but if you and your wife are in a monogamous relationship (you didn’t mention it in your post), then cheating on your wife by sucking men’s cocks whenever you get the chance IS interfering with your life. She should know if you are performing sexual acts with other people (particularly if they are strangers, for a one-time thing) because you are putting her own sexual health at risk here.

I’m not a psychiatrist but I’d file what you described under obsessive tendencies and it wouldn’t hurt to speak to a professional about it.
 
....My wife has occasionally noticed me surfing the web for blowjob porn and is of the opinion that my interest in giving men blowjobs borders on excessive.

My wife's sex drive has always been less intense than mine and she doesn't share my passion for sucking cock.

My desire for performing fellatio doesn't prevent me from carrying out my normal daily duties, I just dream about doing it most of the time.

My question is this; At what point does desire become obsession?
When she makes hourly checks of the closets, looking for evidence? At that point, she might should be referred to a shrink.

:)
 
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