When does an online rel.Become a R/L Rel?

[beth-n-mike]

opening a discussion , due to something had read on the boards Several times before ,
so online flirts lovers and seekers, when "exactly" do you feel an online relationship becomes a real real Relationship??
is it when you meet? when you excahnge pictures? snail mail? phone calls?? rings?? weddign vows??
when , how do you tell ?


BTW , experienced online dater here, will chime in my opinion later.
Beth

 

[Ukin]

opening a discussion , due to something had read on the boards Several times before ,
so online flirts lovers and seekers, when "exactly" do you feel an online relationship becomes a real real Relationship??
is it when you meet? when you excahnge pictures? snail mail? phone calls?? rings?? weddign vows??
when , how do you tell ?
BTW , experienced online dater here, will chime in my opinion later.
Beth

Wow..tough one that.

I have met two ladies from on-line and never saw them again...so it can't be when you meet..although some obviously may have better luck that I do and meet honest people who don't lie about ages or send spoof pictures

So, yes..when does it become real? Is it when you make love...and then meet again? I think the first step is in the meeting.

 

[sortacurious]

I have no experience here, but I would think the same rules apply as a "normal relationship" (whatever that is). Communication. When two people decide together that they want to be exclusive, and "with" each other then that would be the beginning. When it moves from playing and flirting to feelings about each other being expressed, and a desire to move it to the next level. I could be way wrong, though.

 

[Ebonyfire]

When is it real?

In my case it was real when we both decided it was real. Our meeting in real life just confirmed what we both knew to be true.

Ebonyfire

 

[bootstomper]

Good question

This is something that i'm going through right now.I've talked to this girl a lot on-line and on the phone.Now I've got plans to go meet her.So we'll see if something substantial is going to happen.I'm hoping there will be, and I know she does too.

 

[lilrosie lips]

When you and the other one define it as such.... I guess it depends on the two people....what they feel a relationship is... its all a matter of perception to me...

Ukin wrote:
although some obviously may have better luck that I do and meet honest people who don't lie about ages or send spoof pictures

people send false pictures to people they are going to meet???? that may be the stupidist thing I have ever heard.... did they think the other person wouldn't notice the discrepancy?? that boggles even my illogical mind...

 

[MissTaken]

It all depends on what you mean by relationship.

I have friends on line, strictly on line that I care for deeply and who have my undying trust,

I have met many people from on line.

In some cases, our meeting was as ebonyfire explained, a continuation of the on line relationship.

On a few occasions, that face to face meeting brought the friendship to a dead stop. Chemistry wasn't there.

I suppose it depends on teh people involved.

I will be watching this thread closely as this is an issue that hits close to home.

Just when I think I have all the answers, they change the rules!

 

[beth-n-mike]

When is it real...
well, when all parties feel it is ...
not , when you fantasize, or when new relationship energy keeps you feeling as if you are under the influence of an herbal tincture, but , when that has passed, and you still feel this person is important, exchanging pictures.. well, i dotn feel its important . so , i guess i would pass on that

phone calls.. well, i guess being a very verbal person , that would mean a lot more to me , than to someone else...

how about when you have a "key word".. a special "sweet nothing" thats only you know "really what it means"..
i dont know , there are so many microsteps involved in building a relationship...
i guess it works outindividual..

for me and mike , it was the first time we met face to face.. i saw him , we had not exchanged pics.. and i met his eyes , and i finally "knew"
wiht us and Bob, it was a lot faster, the second day we talked, we all felt "ah ha" moment...

who knows... we are ultimately all individuals ...

Beth

 

[omahaman2]

I think I should be able to have a little insight to this, for some strange reason. Its hard to discuss this topic in a thread because when the relationship online becomes real both words dont need to be used you just know and the incredible feeling cant be described in the thing man(better say person) created called language. It iust undescriabable. i keep thinking of that line from the movie jerry mcguire, she had me from the first hello.
jenny and i met online at lit in chat. I virtually touched her arm, she had my heart, i touched her knee, she possesed my soul. we virtually kissed and i became hers forever

 

[alwaysawake]

Simple--when oman met Jenny...instant sparks and a match that was meant to be! Two very good friends who ALWAYS have my best wishes!

 

[JennyOmanHill]

I think I should be able to have a little insight to this, for some strange reason. Its hard to discuss this topic in a thread because when the relationship online becomes real both words dont need to be used you just know and the incredible feeling cant be described in the thing man(better say person) created called language. It iust undescriabable. i keep thinking of that line from the movie jerry mcguire, she had me from the first hello.
jenny and i met online at lit in chat. I virtually touched her arm, she had my heart, i touched her knee, she possesed my soul. we virtually kissed and i became hers forever

Yes, Oman... you seemed to have fallen immediately! I "fought" the idea initially (still thinking an online relationship just "couldn't" be for "real"!). Fortunately, it wasn't very long after that I realized I had "found" an incredible friend who was missing from my life. I fell in love with this special friend of mine sight unseen, and was shocked that I could feel this way at all about anyone!

When Oman arrived to finally meet me in NYC, I knew from the instant that I looked into his eyes that this was indeed the man who I had been waiting for all these years!

Hugs and kisses, AA, for being our big bro', and always giving us your good wishes and support!