When does a Girl Know….she’s a girl?

[amicus]

I have been mystified and enchanted, (Thanx JBJ), with females since I kissed my cousin Patty Ann at four years of age; and been bewitched, bothered and bewildered (song) since.

Having raised five daughters, I personally think girls are different from the moment of birth, but then, I am a bit old fashioned I guess.

Amicus

 

[JamesSD]

Interestingly, I was actually pondering this same question last night. My roommate was watching Heroes, and there was an ad for Tonka trunks that basically had the premise "boys are just built differently". Not having had children of my own yet, and only having experienced being one sex growing up, I wondered "is that claim valid"?

Obviously there are physiological differences between the sexes, especially post-puberty. But it's very difficult to separate the roles of nature and nurture in gender expression and roles. For example, in the US, boys feel very strong social pressure not to show emotion (beyond anger), while it is far more permissible for girls to cry when they are upset. Generally, men express less emotion than women; but how much of that is innate, and how much comes from societal pressure?

My hypothesis has been that society encourages an exaggeration of naturally existing differences, the biological size of which is not clear to me. Men are encouraged and often rewarded for being big, strong, tough, financially successful, etc. Women are encouraged and rewarded for being pretty, delicate, nurturing, etc.

I'm curious about the opinions of those who have had children of both genders, particularly if you worked hard not to treat the boys and girls differently (i.e. handing a girl a doll and a boy a truck from almost day 1). Are there inherant differences in boys and girls? How much of these differences do you think came from their observations of gender roles?

 

[amicus]

Thanks JamesSD, I was considering deleting the thread from lack of interest.

Good questions all. I also had three boys but I don't think I can draw much from my own experiences. Although, during their first several months or so, they seem to exhibit few if any differences.

How much nurture or nature and do we impose expectations? I am sure we do, or most do anyway.

I could say that I think baby girls enjoyed being held and cuddled more than boys, but again, that may be my doing.

I did not wish this to become a political thread so I avoided saying much other than posing the question.

I had more in mind a curiosity about when a girl begins to recognize and realize that boys pay special attention to her because she is a girl, with the longer hair, different clothing; when does she begin to 'doll up' to attract more eyes, that sort of thing.

Amicus....

 

[starrkers]

Seems mum was always trying to get me to be more girlie and I never was - T-shirt and shorts, roaring around on my bike and climbing trees was my thing. With boys it's always been "take me as I am, or leave me. I don't really care and I'm damned if I'm gonna titify myself for you." The few times I have bothered to doll up, it's been for me - to know I can look as good as the other girls if I want to make the effort. But most of the time I couldn't be bothered with it all. I hate fiddling with my hair and it's always cut short. This is a backstory preamble, not a justification.

I have three kids. The eldest is a teenage girl. The other two (sub teen) are boys. When they were babies they were all dressed utilitarianly (is that a word?), in jumpsuits and such that were easy change, easy clean and comfy. My mum bought a really pretty little dress for the daughter when she was born. I put it on her once for a major family reunion - she was the littlest family member at the time, at three months old.
Normally, she wore "boy colours" as much as girl (I borrowed clothes from a friend who had a boy and whose sister had had a boy). The boys wore "girl colours" too.
But my daughter was clothes conscious from the time she could let me know her likes and dislikes. And she liked girlie things - pink and pretty and frilly. She's grown out of pink and frilly now, but still likes pretty things.

The boys couldn't care less. As long as it covers their arse, they're happy.

 

[R. Richard]

I don't know when a girl knows she is a girl, but from the aisle display in the local Wal-Mart there are different diapers for boys or girls.

 

[MaeveoSliabh]

I still haven't quite figured it out.

As for the kids aspect, it just depends on the individual. My boy is all boy. But he's not afraid to cry. The middle one is all girl - except she likes fishing, four-wheelers, and climbing trees. The youngest girl is more like me. She's just as comfortable with boys' toys as with girly stuff.

 

[somberReality]

5 girls? Dear god, i know who to hit up for a daughter.

(I have 3 boys.)

 

[knitedreams]

I knew I was a girl all along because my mom had a thing for dressing me in frilly dresses. Once I got into first grade, I saw a boy and thought he was cute. My Aunt told me how to "catch" him, which involved chasing him around the playground, cornering him, and then kissing him all over his face. Around third grade, I saw that boys had a lot more fun than girls and decided to act like a boy. I still knew I was a girl, but just didn't care. I knew nothing of fashion or the "in thing." All I knew was baseball and the best video games. Actually...I'm still like that today.

So I always knew I was a girl. I just thought boys had the good side of life.

 

[jomar]

I had more in mind a curiosity about when a girl begins to recognize and realize that boys pay special attention to her because she is a girl, with the longer hair, different clothing; when does she begin to 'doll up' to attract more eyes, that sort of thing.

Amicus....

I think you'll need more females to respond to your specific question.

However, biology beyond sex has a strong impact. Kids in the same family are born with different temperments and dispositions regardless of sex, which plays a role.

Having said that, I had a daughter then a son three years later. Middle school (6, 7, 8th grade) is a hotbed of hormones and budding sexual awareness and hope. Teachers hate the smell of Axe, by the way. So i would say that at least by middle school, girls are aware, and probably sooner these days.

I'd be curious as to what the ladies of Lit have to say.

 

[ms.read]

when did i realize i was a girl ? when i had c cup breasts in like fifth grade. I was constantly made in fun of by every one. (large boobies run in my family)... I was a tomboy though. I never dressed up for anyone.

I have recently come into my womanhood though... I like looking good. I like the looks I get from the men who check me out. I wear very little makeup because i don't need it.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

AMICUS

I have 3 daughters and 5 sisters. None of these females ever showed any interest in traditional male activities. I have 6 grand-daughters, and all of them are very feminine.

I taught my daughters basic car service, but none of them had the same level of interest in cars that my son had. Steve's about as macho as men can be.

 

[Chantilyvamp]

I think maybe I was the strange girl. I liked to play with the boys toys as well as the girls toys. I could (i say could cos i havent done it in a long time now) weld better than most men. I hated frilly dresses when young as I was forced to wear them and had a tendency to not like being forced to do anything I didn't want to do. Yet today I love to wear something nice and slinky and femine for a night out. Go figure. As to when I knew boys showed an interest in other girls...probably 3rd grade. As for when i knew boys actually took an interest in me (besides the one who asked me to marry him in kindergarten (no memory of the whole thing just told by him and others) ) when I got into university. I was blind to the whole issue. I knew what I felt but not what anyone else did. And I didnt realise that I scared men off with my confidence and the I don't want all the attention attitude. Which when I was older they all started telling me.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Men couldnt care less about confidence or any of the issues women imagine men fret about. In fact, a big paycheck is a plus. Men want what we've always wanted from females. Pussy and someone to raise the kiddies.

I'll go further. When women show up at work its a sure sign the industry is on the decline and its time to find work with a future. The machines are never far behind the ladies.

 

[lesbiaphrodite]

I realized I was a girl when I was about 4 years old. My next door neighbor chased me around the house and kissed me. Then, he proclaimed his undying love for me.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I think I was about 3. My mother put me in the bath with my brother (I rarely mention him - he tragically died young). I pointed and laughed, "What the hell is that thing?"

 

[Guest]

girls

I always knew I was a girl. I had only sisters for most of chidhood, I had only aunts and their husbands did not matter. My aunts had only female children. Oh I knew there were men they just did not matter in my little girl world.

Then I grew up, boy cousins and little brother were born, and noticed that boys have cool toys like planes and electric train sets and racing cars! Dolls that cry and pee themselves just can't compare.

I wanted those, and my parents just would not oblige. So I waited till I could get real ones. I have not one day of my life regret being a grown up.

Maharat

 

[Guest]

Two weeks ago for Me....

Seriously.

It took some amazing friends, oodles of tears, pain that I didn't know that I needed, and one HELL of a MAN

I am a girl... I am a female... I am a woman

 

[XXplorher]

As soon as her clitoris does not become a cock (truth to how it happens in the womb)… she knows.


This just in: All your cocks are elongated clitoris’ (clitorises?). We ALL start like She. And that’s a fact.

So, from a purely, uh, (man, I'm havin' trouble with the biology here) the question might be better…


When did you know you owned a COCK? Or didn’t?

Or… “Would you rather be a clit or a Cock”? Now THERE’s a thread!


Holy shit, now THAT’S a good thread. Am I wrong? Someone needs to make that happen.




...crap. That is SO the 3am thread. It owns me. Adios. (Do it here and be smarter than me. I never said I was smart)

 

[amicus]

As soon as her clitoris does not become a cock (truth to how it happens in the womb)… she knows.


This just in: All your cocks are elongated clitoris’ (clitorises?). We ALL start like She. And that’s a fact.

So, from a purely, uh, (man, I'm havin' trouble with the biology here) the question might be better…


When did you know you owned a COCK? Or didn’t?

Or… “Would you rather be a clit or a Cock”? Now THERE’s a thread!


Holy shit, now THAT’S a good thread. Am I wrong? Someone needs to make that happen.




...crap. That is SO the 3am thread. It owns me. Adios. (Do it here and be smarter than me. I never said I was smart)

~~~

As I mentioned, I did not intend this to be a political or ideological thread, just an inquiry for the ladies, as to when they realized the benefits of being a girl, or female in general.

When they 'knew' , that fixing their hair, doing make-up, wearing certain clothing, walking and glancing in a certain way, drew attention from the males...and to those who spoke of a 'tomboy' beginning, I am doing a story on that, as to the moment she discovers,,"I'm a Girl", and begins to figure how to live with it and, ahem, if I may, exploit it.

Amicus...

 

[XXplorher]

yer...

I didn't actually read it intelligently (I tend not to do that at this hour). I apologize for that, mate. Your question is worthy. I'll want to view your thread after I'm done being an animal.

As far as I can tell? They're girls way before 'guys' are expecting. I mean...


How old were you when you first slapped your pussy? Like, SLAPPED at it? When did you first want to alter the angle of the shower? When's the first time you got under the faucet when you pretended to take a bath? How long have you actually been rubbing it? When's the first time you actually said... "I know what I'm doing with this and why I'm doing it" How long did it take until you admitted that to yourself? When's the first time your body tore away at itslef... and finished?

How long did it take for a cock to have anything to do with that?


Does that help the thread, mate? I didn't mean to be a... dick (but having done it now? I definitely meant to be a cock. Any answers out there girls?)

 

[Selena_Kitt]

yer...

I didn't actually read it intelligently (I tend not to do that at this hour). I apologize for that, mate. Your question is worthy. I'll want to view your thread after I'm done being an animal.

As far as I can tell? They're girls way before 'guys' are expecting. I mean...

How old were you when you first slapped your pussy? Like, SLAPPED at it? When did you first want to alter the angle of the shower? When's the first time you got under the faucet when you pretended to take a bath? How long have you actually been rubbing it? When's the first time you actually said... "I know what I'm doing with this and why I'm doing it" How long did it take until you admitted that to yourself? When's the first time your body tore away at itslef... and finished?

How long did it take for a cock to have anything to do with that?

Does that help the thread, mate? I didn't mean to be a... dick (but having done it now? I definitely meant to be a cock. Any answers out there girls?)

I was eleven when I first had an orgasm... but I'd been touching it for years. With the intention of feeling good? Because it made me breathless and dizzy... and eager for something... more... ? Since I was... eight? (that seems young, but I swear I remember doing it the year before my first kiss and that was at nine...) But it was really after my first orgasm at eleven that I knew what I was doing and why I was doing it... then I just didn't stop. (How did you know about the bath trick!?!? A girlfriend taught me that when we were twelve... we'd take turns in the tub... until there was no more hot water! And oh my GOD, when my parents invested in a shower massage, I suddenly LOVED being clean... 2-3 times a day, even!)

This just in: All your cocks are elongated clitoris’ (clitorises?).

Clitori? *snerk*