When a sub needs her Master's comforting...

[Ms_Lilith]

and He doesn't seem to care.

I'm awake from terrible nightmares. He greeted me with sexual inuendo, and I told Him how I felt, what kind of fear and pain I am experiencing.. and then He ignored me.

Not what I needed.

The dream:

http://www.literotica.com/forum/showthread.php?threadid=98025

 

[tassie]

is this the guy you met online?

you havent known each other for long, maybe he just cant read you well enough.

or (more likely) he's an online arsehole. he's not worthy of your time. i've read your posts, i know a little of your story. your honey will be there for you today, the online dom sounds like he's in it for kinky play and nothing else. im so sorry.

your interview will be fine. you will be fine. please dont let one arsehole spoil it all for you.

they will find the california rapist, and you're getting help. it's a long road. youve done so well.

i'll be thinking of you today. best luck

 

[Ms_Lilith]

my honey is asleep and he woke when I screamed, but then rolled over and went back to sleep, though I told him I was scared...

And I didn't ask Master to read me, I told him 'this is how I feel', and 'I'm scared', and 'I need comfort'.

And he ignored me and got offline.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Masters DON'T ignore you and go offline..BIG warning signal here..perhaps you should be very glad it happened before you vested to much of your heart and soul into a long term disappointment...


If you need to talk to someone that will listen please feel free to PM Me anytime.

 

[cellis]

Oh Vixen

Shadow is so right... Real Dom's don't abandon you when you need them...

This is a BIG warning signal, Darling....

I am here for you too...

You can pm me anytime...

 

[Kirabeth]

I am here for you also Vixen if you ever need a friend to talk to you, I have been there I was raped in 1996, its a long hard painful road but you are not to blame you are strong you are not a victim but a survivor.

I wish you lots of luck on your interview.

and I agree with most what everone else said about him, if he was not there for you the way he should have been its not a good sign, you deserve better.

 

[MissTaken]

Just dittoing what everyone else said....

dump the Dom.

Nail the interview.

Pm me if you wish.


Smiles and huggles to you.

This sounds like a manipulator with one goal in mind, and that isn't a serious engagement in D/s whether on line or real time.

Sorry to be so blunt, but hate to see you hurting and hanging....

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Just wanted to also ditto what's been said....and to wish you the best of luck with the interview.

If I were you I wouldn't invest anymore time in a Dom that was that callous to my feelings....Not a good sign.

You have my good thoughts and prayers.

 

[cymbidia]

Vix?
I'm not unsympathetic at all to your plight.
I've posted in your very long rape thread.
I know your interview will be a good thing in your life - has been, perhaps, by the time you read this.

I want to say two things to you, though, and both are meant with all the kindess i have to offer you.

1. We focus on BDSM in this forum. It's not really a place that's appropriate for discussion of other issues unless they have a BDSM focus. Please remember that.

2. Most importantly, we focus on the discussion of issuses that relate to real life BDSM. Most of us never, ever do online chat room kinda BDSM play because so many who do play that game are just that: gameplayers. They have *no* concept at all of what it is to really be in this lifestyle, to approach this with honor and honesty.

In my opinon, your online , umm, errr, ~sigh~, "Master" is a prime example, i'm afraid, of the total imbiciles who use the net and inexperienced women like you as more jerk off material.

If you want to learn about BDSM, do it by reading and by talking to the kinds of people who make this place up. Don't think you're going to learn much of anything from some instant Master on the net. Every focused, real dominant in the world knows that it takes months, perhaps more, of very focused time together to get to the level of trust and reciprocity of feelings that is necessary for someone to call yyou "Master" or "Mistress". Someone who wants it, who arrogantly requests it almost instantly is a fraud.

So we keep to BDSM subjects in here, Vix, and we don't discuss much that has to do with chat room style BDSM: The Online Fantasy Game because that crap is a fraud.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

Masters DON'T ignore you and go offline..BIG warning signal here..perhaps you should be very glad it happened before you vested to much of your heart and soul into a long term disappointment...


If you need to talk to someone that will listen please feel free to PM Me anytime.

I know that Masters don't do that. And I actually PMed him and I told him so. I'm going to be let go, I know, but I think it's worth it. I told him
"hey, Sir, y'know? This was one of those times that we talked about where I need to know you care and support me. This is one of those times where I need you to tell me it's okay, and I need you to offer your shoulder. This is what you're supposed to be there for."
I haven't heard back from him.
So this tells me he's not what I'm looking for...

 

[SexyChele]

Vix - can I give ya a hug? *Huuggg* There, ya got one anyway!

I can understand the need to want to explore the submissive side of your sexuality. And sometimes it's just not in the stars to be able to engage in it in real life. But this guy doesn't sound like what you need right now. I will simply say "ditto" to what has been said before.

I don't mean to take the focus off the board, and cym, please forgive me. But I've discovered there seems to be a rash of this "online" stuff. As I've said, I've engaged in this for a short time. It was fun. But I knew it wasn't real. And so did he. But it satisfied a need at the time.

Vix, what you are trying to do is okay. But I would strongly caution about simply jumping into a D/s relationship with that being the primary goal from the beginning. It takes a lot of trust, as well as getting to know the person very well. And "Master" is a title that should only be given to one you have truly come to know and who knows you.

Unfortunately, I've seen so many Literoticans who have known some one for less than a month, and then suddenly he is their "Master" and one true love. It don't work that way in real life. There are ways to do what you want, Vix. But you need patience - and lots of it! You need to try to weed through the pricks and find the flowers that hide from view. They are out there, but they can be hard to find.

As I've stated - the guy who I engaged in a D/s relationship last summer turned out to be a great friend this summer. We no longer have that type of relationship, and we are fine with that. But it wasn't something we "jumped" into, either.

Again, if you need to talk, just PM me.

cym - sorry for drawing attention to the "online" thing, but it just upsets me when these guys find young women (and sometimes older ones) who they think they can use just to get off. It truly gives the whole lifestyle a bad name. I'll try to refrain from this type of discussion in the future.

 

[cymbidia]

There will be severe limits placed on the number of threads in this forum that are devoted to chatroom type (instant) "Master-slave" relationships.

That's all i'm saying here.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

Hey, Cym, I apologize. I overstepped a bound. Let the thread die, everyone.

Sorry again.

 

[WriterDom]

A Master isn't a sugar free pill you drop into your life to sweeten it up. Your submission is your greatest gift. If the level of commitment you offer is an online fantasy, then don't complain when real life interrupts your fantasy.


If you do seek this life, it's a journey not a destination. Until you accept that what you know is only a small part of what you need to know, then you will be on the right path.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

A Master isn't a sugar free pill you drop into your life to sweeten it up. Your submission is your greatest gift. If the level of commitment you offer is an online fantasy, then don't complain when real life interrupts your fantasy.


If you do seek this life, it's a journey not a destination. Until you accept that what you know is only a small part of what you need to know, then you will be on the right path.

Cym would like this thread to dissolve...

so let's let it.

 

[cymbidia]

I don't own this site.
I don't own this forum.
I don't own this thread.
I don't own these words.
I don't own your thoughts.

Post whatever you like, all of you, any of you.

As a moderator, my voice is just as loud or quiet as anyone's, and echoes/enforces only that which is held to be of value by the community at large.

As a community member, my thoughts are just as important or banal as anyone's, no more, no less.

Don't pout though, please, while you're doing whatever it is that you feel like doing.

Thank you.
cym
BDSM Forum community member

 

[Soron]

Throwing My Two Cents In

In all honesty I don't get the 'exclusively online' relationship
ESPECIALLY when it concerns D/s...

My love bluemouse has been on the threads for a year off and on...me about three months now...we made a pact that we would do this online BS only to work towards a real life future

we've had one weekend together as yet and plan another one in September...if not for that, working towards a real future, I could not do this...we don't cyber and hell we don't even have phone sex...after having her for that weekend it would seem even more fake to me now

Posting to each other and to others...that's what it's all about...talking and talking and talking....can't do enough of that when you're a thousand miles apart

if I've gotten off the subject I apologize folks

 

[Cirrus]

I'm sorry to hear of your disappointment, but, and I speak from very personal experience, most (and I say MOST) online relationships be they D/s or nilla don't work out.

Fantasies are nice...they're fun, they're usually safe, they can be anything you want them to be. They can fulfil a purpose and even be healthy. But they are just that...fantasies.

I was, and still am, deeply scarred by an online relationship that was only a fantasy, but which I thought was more. When we met and things didn't go well, it was easy for him to walk away, easy for him to betray and dispose of me because I/we simply weren't real. Each existed to the other as phosphors on a screen for 2 years. We only shared the good times and had fun with each other...neither was there to help the other through the normal day to day life bullshit we all go through. It's like we were both figments of the other's imagination.

vixen, I don't know you so I could be way off the mark here. You've been through some tramatic events and I respect your emotions and your survival. I'm not unsympathetic in the least. But I think those events have left you weekend, and instead of building up your own strenght and your own faith in yourself you're looking to someone outside to do it for you, and you get disappointed when they don't live up to what you wished you'd see in yourself. You are strong, you have every reason to have faith...just believe it.