when a man wants it...

[axel]

I think that a couple's urges timing is a very important subject. It is normal that each partner has a different time of a big erotic urge, due to his/her temperament or circumstances like a man coming back from an exhausting day at work and wishing nothing but a quiet sleep or coming home horny like a rabbit while his wife is exhausted from baby care, laundry or job worries .We should not foget mild headaches or stomach indigestions and foul mood.
Our raising requires men to be sex hungry constantly and women to be heavily protected castles requiring heavy siege before opening their gates by storming or negotiations and final surrender. How a man can confront a situation when he is completely out of mood and her beloved soulmate horny like a bitch in heat? How should an exhausted sleepy out of mood woman cope with a bothering ,aching and throbbing lover? And what is the limit between a normal coaxing to lovemaking by a horny man and non-consent coersion?

 

[Ezzie]

I've always believed that being upfront and honest is the best way. If I'm not in the mood for sex, I just tell him. I don't go into "Poor me" details of how tiring my day was or give an excuse that isn't true like the ol' "I have a headache" I figure that if I'm in a safe, loving relationship then he will understand that I'm simply not in the mood. He can try to coax, not force me but chances are when I've made up my mind, it'll stay made up. But the affection and attention he gives me in the "Wooing" process doesn't hurt.

 

[Bliss]

Our raising requires men to be sex hungry constantly and women to be heavily protected castles requiring heavy siege before opening their gates by storming or negotiations and final surrender.

Talk about Fractured Fairy Tales! So sorry if that's truly how you were raised, really.
Nobody has to try to beseige me gates to get some luvin. Wow, this is too funny. Sorry, I'll try to stop laughing so I can be coherent. I suppose SB will write a thread about us horridly forward American women now but tough titty.

My fiance and I both drag in equally tired and it's just the luck of the draw if who wants it more gets it. No one has to do any special song and dance, storm the castle or whatever. That all seems very archaic and removed from today's reality.

Are you sure you're not Axel Rose and just yanking our chain?

_______________________________________________
RAPUNZLE! RAPUNZLE! LET DOWN YOUR HAIR!

 

[axel]

a response to bliss

Bliss,I am glad that you are not raised in that way.Neither do I. But still I would like to remind you that except the USA there are another 200 countries in the world with stll "archaic" as you call it upbringing and social prejudice.
But the most striking is that there is in the USA a rather recently published survey stating that a considerable proportion of wives are raped from their husbands whenever they do not consent to "give in" every time the husband wants it and it is still a matter of debate whether marriage gives a husband the right not to take a "no" as an answer. Of course I abhor those "archaic" laws but they are still in application in several american States, if I am not wrong.Nevertheless, only last spring there was in the European Union the first attempt to change the law that gives a husband the "license to rape" his wife.
As you see, Bliss, the problem unfortunately exists, whether I am Axel Rose or not...

 

[wolfy]

Clones

If you make a clone of yourselves you will never have that problem again! One of you is horny and the other isn't? Clone swapping time!!! Half the work for each clone! Twice the sexual gratification. Yes clones are the wave of the future! Can you cheat on your wife with your wife? Certainly not! Fantasized about having an orgy but you don't want to involve strangers? Clone orgies are the best!Everyone knows eachother already and If your not bi neither is anyone else in the room!

Cloning is not just for sheep anymore! Buy now and your clones will pay later! *lick*


Ps. Can you tell I didn't sleep last night?

 

[axel]

please, keep advertize that !

Wolfy, please do me a favor and keep advertizing the benefits of cloning, because I work professionally with DNA
applications and you feed me with new ideas! Keep up the good job, even if you have to stay sleepless the nights!
I really feel grateful for that feedback ! I 'll buy you a drink the day I will sell the first cloned married couple orgy!

 

[Skitten]

At one time or another women as well as men, are not in the mood when their significant others are. In my opinion just be honest with yourself as well as your partner. Don't just do it because that is what he wants. That is showing him that your feeling don't mean as much as his.

Be honest if your tired or just not in the mood let your partner know, that it just not a good time right now. We all get stressed or have things on our mind. It doesn't mean anything. Being honest with your partner is the only way to have that relationship grow and remain strong. And not being passive just because your partner is in the mood.

Believe me it will be better for you and your partner in the long run. Stay firm in your decision, they will get over it and later when you are in the mood much more enjoyable.

 

[axel]

what if?...

Skitten, i agree with your reply, but I would like your opinion on the following cases:

-many times I have had the experience of a gf who expresses her uncontrollable urges for relief and tesnion release at that very moment and if I refusde thenI am treated as somebody not caring about her need for immediate gratification. Many women told me that there is nothing worse than having to sleep with their urges fogging their brain and straining their body. Personally, I would never leave a gf in that case, whether in the right mood or not
my loving care will realease her tensions and believe me she apreciates it immensely !

-in some case, women get married being unprepared and unaware of the sexual consequences.After the marriage they
realize that they detest sex or that their career affects their libido tremendously or their newly discovered role as a motherhood altered their approach towards sex and their only concern is a quiet undisturbed sleep. Mind that we are talkikng about couples with children and who really love each other, except that specific wife's particularity, and divorce is not an issue.

Skitten, I am definitely not speaking about the cases when today is the wrong day but tomorrow the sun will be bright again.

 

[Bliss]

Re: a response to bliss

Yadda, Yadda, Yadda

None of which gives you license to perpetuate those misdeeds as every day life, regardless of country of origin.

My clear point, Mr. Rose, was that woman have a right, without holding up a protest placard, to be recognized as willing, initiating sexual creatures without playing any stupid "catch me, catch me" games - which can be fun but are wholly unnecessary to the actual love making in the 21st Century.

My American comment was a joke. I've lived all over the planet and I aware of the similarities and differences amongst all westernized nations. You on the other hand seem to operating on outmoded data from 18th Century Transylvania.

No biggie, just cluing you into the fact that the days when you get to tell us how we feel about anything, least of all our own sexuality, are long gone.

Short but sweet, sometimes the woman wants it more than man, instead of vice versa. Whoop de do.

*insert Helen Reddy singing here*

 

[Skitten]

Axel;
After and I mean right after it is quite hard for a woman to forget being a mother and remebering that she too is a sexual partner. Sometimes it is more mind oriented than not wanting to have sex.

As for theese women who are not being satisfied and have theese urges means that maybe. They are not giving all they can into the sexual experience I mean it isn't the mans job to satisfy your every need you have to be an active partner.

And if you man isn't too damn tired wake him up and satisfy him I know that can get those juice flowing and help you feel satisfied too. You always have to remember that it takes two and if she isn't satisfied maybe she isn't giving enough of herself to you. Let the barriers down and really enjoy one another.

Motherhood can be hard, I have 2 of my own but not so much that you forget about how great sex is be supportive, but also let her know your needs and help her to remeber hers. Hope it helps some.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Yes, its true, there are times when I don't want it. I tell the StudMuffin no. There are times when he is so hot and bothered and has to cum that he will continue to badger me on and on. Until I either give in or get violent.

Yes, some places still devalue women. Thats the way it is, and it will change, eventually. More towards home, here in the USA, I can't speak for all women, but when my man tries to force me into sexual activities when I'm disinterested, violence ensues. Its the only language he seems to understand when his prick is doing the thinking for him.

Once I got it through his head that when I was not horny, but gave in anyway, I don't want a 4 hour long quickie, nor do I want to move or contribute. I prefer a hop on, do your thing, then hop off, do you mind if I read? Understandably, at those times, he generally prefers to just jack off.

 

[axel]

my name is not Rose

Bliss, you keep misunderstanding me, i dont know why.
Basically, we do not disagree in anything, why do you have to be so aggressive? As for living two centuries apart....
well, no big deal , it 's fine by me...Every centurie has its attractions...My best regards from the 18th centurie and the depths of the rain forest tribe where you teleported me !!!

 

[axel]

this is exactly my point, KillerMuffin !

I think KillerMuffin's story tells it all ! That's exactly the purpose of the whole post, to show that sometimes that difference in mood can cause serious problems to couples. KillerMuffin suggests a passive giving in
to avoid further trouble with the man returning the favor by hopping quickly on and off. Another indirect suggestion is a jack off. I would take her in my arms affectionately
happy that she is so sexy that makes me so bothered and dreaming of the time she will invite me to share the ecstasy together.

 

[axel]

to skitten

skitten,as I replied to KillerMuffin, I prefer to wait until she is also in the right mood.I love when she sleeps in my arms quiet , despite my excitement.I love the fact that she incites those urges in me for her and I have never
been harmed in any way by sleeping bothered.
As for her, I really liked your suggestion, it could be a solution.But I never let her suffer, I simply cant stand it, no matter how tired and sleepy I feel.
The only solution ,I think, is really loving caring from both parts.
That temporary loss of libido related to motherhood is a very respected and totally accepted situation. Sex drive can be converted into immense affection.

 

[Curious Guy]

A little different view. Sometimes I come home, dead on my ass and the wife says " ya wanna fool around?"

I say "sure"

I may be tired, but, just a little taste of that sweet honeypot and I am all of a sudden not as tired as I was.

It could be because she usually finds the inspiration to fulfill my urges when she does not feel like it, also. It is a two way street.

 

[Bliss]

Re: my name is not Rose

Bliss, you keep misunderstanding me, i dont know why.
Basically, we do not disagree in anything, why do you have to be so aggressive? As for living two centuries apart....
well, no big deal , it 's fine by me...Every centurie has its attractions...My best regards from the 18th centurie and the depths of the rain forest tribe where you teleported me !!!

LOLOL! You take yourself too seriously. You really believe that there is NO time ever never when the roles are reversed? When, for example, the self assured outspoken Muffin wants it like the dickens and StudMuffin can't or won't "provide services"?

I am simply pointing out to you that women are not the frail, must be talked into sex creatures that you seem to believe in.
It's sadly true that there are partners, of either sex, who are idiotic with their "need" (really just a want) and attempt to force themselves on the other person. But that is NOT the majority.

Isn't anyone else out there dating or married to or sleeping with normal people who expresses themselves with something besides extreme physical violence?

Oh, well, maybe axel is right. All of y'all live in relationships that make SmackDown 2000 look peaceful and just don't want to talk about.

And dude, please. Voicing my opinion is not aggressive. In this country, it's my right. *flag waving, Greenspan worshipping, Capitalist right here*

Nuff said.

 

[Curious Guy]

Bliss dear, read the post just before yours. We seem to be in agreement here.

 

[lala]

here i go again,.... this one's a doozy- i hope it works

axel, people have to be honest, and feel safe. i do see (as an american!) vestiges of just that- making men out to be aggressors, and women to be defenders. i think it sucks. i ignore it like i ignore the concept that you should be married before you have sex, you can't love someone of your own gender or of a different race, etc. it's outdated. just like a lot of other concepts.

we at literotica defy all sorts outdated social attitudes, i can't even list them all, there's too many. we have to be responsible people and change what we don't like. and it starts in the bedroom. (the place where we sleep, make children, nurture them, and each other, where we care for each other, the center of home, our place of comfort, safety, and security) we are the instigators of social change!

as for being in that situation, should it arise:

i think everyone should have lots of confidence. i wish everyone did, but i know some people were raised otherwise or are just not like that. what i hate is passive-aggressive behavior, not saying anything, then resenting the other person,

i've said before, but why not again? we make our own decisions in life and need to be responsible for them.

do not let someone else screw you- figuratively or literally. do not let it happen.

that means if you don't want it, say so,... and let me say, i don't know about you but i can successfully fight off a significant other, whether it's by clamping my legs shut, writhing like an eel, hitting, clawing, etc. (i've only had to fight someone off once- someone i didn't know well, but i was letting them stay with me. and i felt no need to be gentle.) and it's hard to keep it up when it's being kicked, bitten, or can't get in. if they don't respond to that- it's rape. plain and simple.

that also means if you want it- pay attention. if someone else doesn't want it, do you get off on your partner being unhappy? then get counseling if you do! look at their face, as you pound away or whatever it is you're doing, are they smiling? have you ever made someone cry by having sex with them? do you like it? do you normally make your significant other cry when you have sex? if so, i'll say it again, get counseling damnit!

Sidenote : sometimes we want someone to gently bring us into the mood- doing things we like, etc. if we still don't come around,... there are always defining points in a situation,...where it becomes clear either it will happen or it won't,... why prolong it to the point of risking injury?

i hope this helped a little bit,...

 

[Bliss]

Bliss dear, read the post just before yours. We seem to be in agreement here.

Curious George, darling, read my first posting way at the top of this thread. I said it first! Neener, Neener, and then even more NEENER!

*I'm more tired than you, rub my feet*

 

[KillerMuffin]

LOLOL! You take yourself too seriously. You really believe that there is NO time ever never when the roles are reversed? When, for example, the self assured outspoken Muffin wants it like the dickens and StudMuffin can't or won't "provide services"?

Its quite simple. I don't get any. I writhe around on the floor howling with furstration, in the beginning, and then in a little boring self gratification. But thats when he can't, cause he hurts too much. When he just won't, then he's a sweet sexy soul who will just hold me while I get myself off. Interesting how my doing that will occassionally get him excited. Occassionally. Most of the time, all I have to do is bend over, ass in the air, on any pretext and sproinnggggg instant joystick.