What would you do if you were no longer permitted to work?

[KillerMuffin]

After the initial rejoicing and merry-making. You know, after the week has passed and you realize you are bored stupid.

The StudMuffin may never be permitted to work again. You know he has that wildly raging Post Traumatic Stress Disorder thing going on. Yes, he is a danger to himself and more specifically others, the docs at VA aren't releasing him to work. Yes, he can go get a job and just not tell the employer that he has PTSD but doing so makes him non-compliant and he loses all of his well earned VA benefits.

So now he gets to come home and sit on his ass until VA rates his disability. The doctors, all 5 of them, have strenuously recommended 100%, we'll see if that happens. So this translates to a physically relatively healthy StudMuffin with too much free time and not a whole lot to fill it with. He's always worked. No, he can't go to school either. VA regulations prohibit work or school with 100% disability ratings. I know what the Stud is going to do, go stir crazy and take me with him.

The question is what would you do? You can't get a job, you can't start a business, and you can't go to school because doing so would not only make you lose benefits, including the medical ones you need, but force you to pay some or all back. How do you fill your time? Would it affect your emotional well-being?

Maybe the StudMuffin will learn to crochet or make knives or something.

 

[R Nitelight]

KillerMuffin

Volunteering?

 

[Matthew D]

Hey KM,
That is an idea, he can try to teach himself something new..Does he like drawing or something along those lines.. he might be able to get that as part of his treatment and learn something at the same time.. just a thought

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

If I couldn't work, I'd sit around and......

Whack off.

In SM's case - I'm sure the Doc's would concur - let him play with guns, knives and explosives.

Great theropy that one.

Seriously though - he should get into something he can do at home - to work and make money. Cars baby! Restoring'em, fixing'em, building hot rods - etc..

A lot better'n doilies and duck decoys.

 

[Juliangel]

Working on cars like Sparky said. A hobby like wood working something that will keep his hands and mind busy.

I sketch when I need an escape from my life, it really helps.

 

[Ambrosious]

Sparky

What the fuck do you have against doilies? I've been making 'em ever since I was a wee little dependent of the state. They are not feminine! Shut up, youse.

 

[brazenblaze]

Maybe he can try volunteering or like was said early, pick up a hobby or something he can do at home that will make him feel productive. If he's used to working and staying busy he'll need something to keep him occupied so he doesn't feel as he is a burden. Woodworking, framing, writing, art...there are a lot of choices. He'll just have to find the one that suits him.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Volunteering? Um, the Stud has PTSD from a warzone where people did nasty things, like die, and he got to help them along. He is, to put it mildly, dangerous. He doesn't play well with others, he has anger issues, he knows how to kill people, and he has killed people before. Get him in a desert and he loses it.

I know what the stud is going to do, he's going to go to the woods and likely not come back out very much.

The question was, what would you do?

I know what I'd do, did it for a while, I would stay home and write. The more I write the more I'd do it. Whether I do it well is my opinion or not is anyone else's.

 

[Juliangel]

The question was, what would you do?

Well I haven't had a job outside the house for over 11 years. I have stayed home with the kids since the first one started causing problem 3 months before he was born.

I sketch, cross stitch and learn other new hobbies and I surf the internet and talk to other adults. Other than that I fix peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch and watch Disney a lot.

 

[Guest]

I have an uncle who learned to fix watches. You would be surprised how hard it is to find someone to do that until you need someone to do it! You put an ad in the paper once he is good enough to do it. Buy him some books then go to yard sales or dollar stores to buy some for him to take apart. Trying to help hope that does!

 

[coach]

KM I know what I'd do. I'd go into the woods and not come out unless I had to.
No I'm not joking. The bush is the only place thats untouched by mans fuck ups. You go there and its just you and nature in all its untouched innocents. Like a baby never been touch by evil, uncorrupted and totaly innocent.
I envey Stud and hope thats where he finds his peace, because if there is any place he can, its there. So just be there for him when he comes out.

 

[brazenblaze]

re: what would you do?

I would go completely off my rocker. I only have 5 years left with Uncle Sam and I'm already planning my next career. I love my husband and my kids, but to stay at home. YUCK!!! Guess, I'm too driven. Took 3 days off from work and I've been here, just to keep from calling to make sure everything is surviving without me.

 

[Nogard]

Might work as a volenteer with VA. Lots of vets have ptsd some in worse shape than him. Not only can he help himself but others. Also helps with self respect

 

[Nogard]

Coach, Apparently you have never encountered the vets that return to the bush. They are one step away from murder or suicide. Completely out of touch with reality. They constantly live with their fears and become extremely dangerous not only to others but themselves. PTSD is a mental condition they need help, not isolation where they can feed on their paranoia

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Well, if........ if........ if.......

I had to stay home, and not interact with many other folks out there - and I had you........

I'd volunteer for some type of sexual, on-line experimentation - you know, that made web generated income for us both.

I'd Kama Sutra the hell out of you baby - let people watch on the web and rake in the jing. $$$$$!!!!

I'd create an entire interactive sex environment, right in the old barn there - roll bars hanging from the ceiling and all.

Take sex requests from the web - for mucho bucks.

There problem solved - everybody happy?

 

[Skibum]

I would write a lot more. Maybe even write that novel I've been threatening to write for years.

 

[Guest]

 

[Curious Guy]

What I would do

I am good at building and making things. So I would probably build wood craft novelties for my wifes new craft business. (Have you noticed the prices on that stuff?) My part would be strictly a hobby.

To keep busy is probably the key to not going completely off the edge. Most hobbies today can also turn a profit. Helps when the family provider can still feel needed and useful.

 

[naudiz]

For the past three years, I've been pretty much house bound. I've taken on a lot of projects, mostly online but some around the house. I like to sew and cook, and I'm always making up new recipes. I read a lot. I volunteer when I can, but I'm rarely well enough to be around people for very long. I do a lot of writing when I'm up to it, and even though I try to avoid the television, occasionally I get sucked in to watching it.

Problem is, no matter what I do, the boredom comes. So does feeling helpless and trapped. The biggest problem I run into is I get lonely. I used to be an active person with a lot of social contacts. Now, I'm in solitary confinement and didn't even commit a crime. I can tell I'm having a bad day when the telemarketers can't wait to get off the phone with me.

I never thought about what I would do if I ended up like this. I never thought it could happen to me. Being in this situation, I've learned that keeping busy is important; finding something to build, to create. Society teaches that if you aren't healthy and productive, life isn't worth living. I struggle constantly with feeling like I have no right to be alive because I'm not able to go out into the world and earn my keep. People making comments like "If I wasn't able to work I would just kill myself." doesn't help - yet people tell me this, like it's some kind of macabre and unsubtle hint.

I've had a lonely, angry day so I'm not being particularly upbeat about this, and for that I apologize. On the good days, everything falls together and I have no trouble finding things to do. On the bad days, when the energy or creativity just isn't there - that's when it gets rough. Right now, my no-energy-no-creativity busywork of choice is writing lists of names I might use for characters in future stories. It gives me something to do, and it puts me in a mental state of looking forward to a time when the creativity will be there.

 

[Never]

Write and draw and write some more.
But that's just me.