What is the most RIDICULOUS feedback you have ever received?

[Svenskaflicka]

No matter if it's good or bad, if it's "great story, I wanked off 3 times!" or "You suck.", what's the most RIDICULOUS feedback you have ever received?

My two most stupid feedbacks are:

About my brother/sister - incest story: "when he wakes up, he not only remembers what they have done, but they do it again, and then they move, and live together, and get married, and have a kid..."

About my mature story: "learn how to puntuate and use quotation marks! Your story might
be pretty good, but it is far too difficult to read because of
the lack of these two grammar skills."

For the first one: no comments.

For the second one: ars gratia artis. (Creator's right to bend the rules in order to achieve an effect.) No, seriously, there are differences between english and Swedish when it comes to the use of quotation marks (in Sweden they are only for direct quotes, not for speech - in the latter case we use a line like this:
-I know, said Mark.) and punctuation.

 

[tenyari]

This message contains feedback for: tenyari
About the submission: Naked Girl Ch. 2
This feedback was sent by: Anonymous

Comments:

It is really amazing how horrible (and how detrimental to the advancement of
blacks) this rap "music" is. What a terrible social trend. Of course, the
people who seek to defend rap by dubbing it "street poetry" are merely condoning
ignorance and illiteracy.

*DO NOT hit the REPLY button to respond to this email.*

To which I went off on a tirade here on the forums about the social benifits of Rap, and the activism of Rap artists.

Of course, the story never once mentioned Rap. But I guess if you have black characters it has to be about Rap music...

 

[Quasimodem]

It is really amazing how horrible (and how detrimental to the advancement of blacks) this rap "music" is. What a terrible social trend. Of course, the people who seek to defend rap by dubbing it "street poetry" are merely condoning ignorance and illiteracy.

Of course, the story never once mentioned Rap. But I guess if you have black characters it has to be about Rap music...

Possibly, it meant 'rape' music, and was comparing it to 'street pokery.'

Oops! I forgot: A bigoted mind is a terrible thing to cut & paste.

 

[deliciously_naughty]

sigh...perhaps it's not ridiculous, but I think it's a silly question. I'm always asked if I'm as wild as my characters. My characters are generally wild...and if I acted like that you bet your ass I'd be making a shit load of money working in porn.

 

[Guest]

My all time favorite!

Got an anonymous feedback once from someone who wrote me regarding my Brother and Sister sexcapades (incest) story. They said something along the lines of:

"I can't understand why you would write a story about incest. I think it's sick!"

And I thought....then why are YOU reading it?

 

[horny_giraffe]

"pls add br rapes sis or how to fuck sis without knowing her something
like that "

This feedback confused me. I couldn't figure out if it was a comment or a suggestion. I've never gotten hate mail or anything remotely negative--unless this one was negative?

 

[Guest]

LOL.........

That was good HG....I'm sure he was wondering if somehow the "brother" could sneak into his sisters bedroom and fuck her without her ever awakening. Gee....haven't we all done that? Don't we all have sisters who are sound sleepers and never DO wake up when we're fucking them like crazy?

I'm sure a number of us have certainly had that experience. And the best part....our sisters never even knew!

Ah huh..........

I remain,

 

[KillerMuffin]

For the second one: ars gratia artis. (Creator's right to bend the rules in order to achieve an effect.) No, seriously, there are differences between english and Swedish when it comes to the use of quotation marks (in Sweden they are only for direct quotes, not for speech - in the latter case we use a line like this:
-I know, said Mark.) and punctuation.

You might want to put this in your biography or in your stories themselves as an author's note. Or something to this effect. You're undoubedtly not shocked, but most Americans are fully unaware that there exists English grammar and punctuation rules outside of US or UK standards.

It seems kind of crappy to have to explain that, but Lit allows non-US and non-UK grammar and punctuation standards where most 'zines and sites require that they follow at least one or the other. This will save some confusion on the part of your fans and will probably stop those stupid emails.

If you choose to put in the stories, you can edit them by putting in whatever you like into the text (use the <I>italicized text</I> codes if you don't already know them to set off the author's note) and resubmitting them as Title of Story **EDIT*** or something like that.

It's easier to do the biography, but sometimes they don't read biographies.

I'm just plumb full of good advice today *sigh*

 

[KillerMuffin]

My most ridiculous piece of feedback was:

"I liked the story and I'd give you a 5, but you're a Republican."

 

[Guest]

I just received the following several days ago.

"i have read your story and it got me soooooooo fucking hot that i
realllly wanna start a efucking rampage with you.... interested???"

I'm happy the story made them hot (he didn't say which story). When I read stories I like they make me hot. But why do a few readers assume I want to personally 'efuck' with them?

I love writing erotica, I enjoy reading the stories and I want other people to enjoy them too. I've been lucky in that my feedback has been wonderful and mostly positive. And I welcome constructive comments (whether or not I take the opinion or advice - lol). I just wonder at times what certain people are thinking???

 

[tenyari]

There are a lot of people who go through life and never quite get it that the universe does not revolve around them.

 

[Guest]

Gee Sweetsubsara........

Just looking at your Av makes me want to efuck with you. Though as you can see by mine...I'm a bit one dimensional. Still....could make for an interesting coupling don't ya think?

I remain,

 

[Guest]

Re: Gee Sweetsubsara........

Just looking at your Av makes me want to efuck with you. Though as you can see by mine...I'm a bit one dimensional. Still....could make for an interesting coupling don't ya think?

I remain,

Big sigh - your AV may be one-dimensional, but your stories certainly aren't!! Such nice reads. . .

(Now, how to get our AV's together? Hmmmm)

 

[Guest]

Well........arn't you sweet?

Thank you SSS.......<wink>

Your place...or mine?

 

[MissTaken]

Most ridiculous feedback...

"I love your stories, wanna chat?"



Ridiculous, because I have no stories submitted!

 

[Quasimodem]

"I love your stories, wanna chat?"
Ridiculous, because I have no stories submitted!

That's just NOT FAIR!

Did you chat with him, and tell him that HE was MissTaken

 

[Wyatt]

I have feedback suggesting I can't spell. E.G. COLOUR....not COLOR. If they check my Bio they will see I am a Brit. I have a whole CATALOGUE of these spelling mistakes....also why do all my feedbacks on my one and only incest story say it would be great if I did a sequel but the aunt had several children by the nephew? What is the link between incest and pregnancy that is so alluring?

 

[Svenskaflicka]

It's actually quite hilarious... how narrow-minded people can be. When I write feedback, I try to stick to things that actually MEAN something, like "I didn't like your story because it was so unrealistic" or "I liked your story very much because you have such a beautiful, poetic vocabulary", but I NEVER bother pointing out minor details like spelling mistakes or grammar boo-boos.

And what IS this fascination some people have with having sex with people that are not really aware that they are having sex? If you just want a peg or a hole, may I suggest using a dildo or an artificial vagina?

One of the greatest part about sex, to me, is to get response from my lover. Narcissist as I am, I get really turned on by seeing, hearing, and feeling how much I arouse my partner.

Me thinks us Europeans need a special Category. No, not Non-English, I was thinking more along the line of "Stories in English by Non-American Writers". The category could have a disclaimer, just like Celebrity does, and it point out that these stories are written in Non-American English.

If those spelling/grammar/brother-fucking-sister-without-her-knowing-it-until-she-becomes-pregnant-loving morons would actually be able to understand such a disclaimer...

 

[DVS]

I feel left out. All I get are a little feedback stating "I loved your story." Or, "it was AWESOME."

Don't get me wrong. These, and all of mine are great for the libido, but not something I could categorize as ridiculous. Some of these I have read in this thread are RIDICULOUS!

 

[MissTaken]

That's just NOT FAIR!

Did you chat with him, and tell him that HE was MissTaken

*giggles*

I already have an identity issue....

That would really confuse us all!



Actually, I said " thank you" and asked how he got into the notebooks under my bed as that is where all my stories hide!

 

[NaughtyMike]

Very interesting. While its difficult to separate your fact from fiction, your
essay for a HOOT & a HALF!

I just emailed copies to my wife and my son.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-sorry I'm kinda dence
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X_ Could the story be developed more fully? That is, is it too short to do
the plot justice? Is it under 750 words?
[This was on a story that was submitted being 5 pages long-sent to me by our editors.]

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The left tit is larger than the right tit because years ago the women worked
and carried the babies in their left arm
and breast fed while working. Ref: Readers Digest, Janes left breast. About
20 years ago.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

[Guest]

The left tit is larger than the right tit because years ago the women worked
and carried the babies in their left arm
and breast fed while working. Ref: Readers Digest, Janes left breast. About
20 years ago.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eeeek.

 

[DVS]

The left tit is larger than the right tit because years ago the women worked
and carried the babies in their left arm
and breast fed while working.

Reminds me of a joke that goes something like...
A man goes to the doctor, concerned because his cock leans to the right.
"Doc, my cock leans to the right. Can you help?"

"Try using your left hand for a while," replied the doctor.

OK, I know it isn't much. And, I am sure I have some how told it wrong. But, if you heard it told correctly, I am sure you would be laughing now.

Maybe there was a duck in it somewhere.

 

[Guest]

Maybe there was a duck in it.

So the duck goes to the doctor?? Is the duck eating too many cheetos?

(there was this joke about a guy with an orange dick, and the doctor told him to stop eating cheetos before jacking off, but I digress)

 

[DVS]

So the duck goes to the doctor?? Is the duck eating too many cheetos?

(there was this joke about a guy with an orange dick, and the doctor told him to stop eating cheetos before jacking off, but I digress)

Very likely a version of the joke I tried to tell.
The duck? There always seems to be a duck in those jokes.

Oh, and I don't like cheetos. Would Ritz crackers do the same thing, you think?