What is considered cheating??

[angel_nbama]

Alright peeps I want your thoughts on this..........

 

[1sexylady]

Alright peeps I want yours thoughts on this..........

When you are with someone other than the one your committed yourself too in a physical way.... Just my opinion...

 

[innocentnbama]

Depends on the situation I think.I used to think cheating was a bad thing but here lately I dont seem to see it the same way.So I guess it would depend on what kind of situation you are in.

 

[angel_nbama]

I think it is still cheating but what if things were bad at home and leaving was not a option?

 

[Kynin]

I think it is still cheating but what if things were bad at home and leaving was not a option?

Think that is a personal question. You can only answer for yourself. For some flirting is cheating, for others its a touch or kiss, still others its intimate contact, and some its not cheating if they feel that they have been emotionally or physically abandoned cause they are just seeking the comfort thier lover should be supplying. Everyone has to answer that question for themselves. Not sure if that helps any but don't know if I can tell you anything that will help.

 

[angel_nbama]

That did help..........very good answer

 

[Kynin]

That did help..........very good answer

Glad to help. Its a subject I've had to wrestle with myself for a long time now. If you need someone to talk to feel free to PM me.

 

[angel_nbama]

I do think about it and I know that the truth when it comes right down to it but you can't help but to think there is way to make it right to cheat......I hope that makes sense

 

[1sexylady]

I do think about it and I know that the truth when it comes right down to it but you can't help but to think there is way to make it right to cheat......I hope that makes sense

To me if your comfortable with what your doing then you shouldn't let others make you think otherwise... Sometimes people don't have a choice... Then again can they handle the consequence if caught???

There is alot to think about and for some alot to lose.... Is cybering cheating....???? I don't think so....is flirting??? I don't think so there either... For some the thought that someone else cares is enough to get by...for others the act has to be there...

As Kynin said it is a personal thing and only you know what is best for you... Forget what others think they don't live in your shoes and it is just their opinion vs yours...

Cheating is only wrong if YOU think so...

 

[Ts Jack]

Alright peeps I want your thoughts on this..........

I take very few things as "Iron Clad Rules", angel_nbama. But this is an exception. There is no justification for giving yourself to anyone other than the person to whom you are committed.

There are two quick seeming exceptions to that. The first is what if it's a bad situation at home and there is no relationship left. I still tend to believe this is not an exception to the rule.

Second, I've heard that phone sex, cyber sex and the like are not really cheating. Again I have to disagree. Anything that interferes with a committment is wrong.

One never knows if a failed marriage or relationship will not reconcile. But would it even have a chance to do so if a secondary relationship blooms? Is that fair to any of the three? Even in a failed or failing relationship isn't there the likelyhood of feelings of betrayal?

And is it worth all the heartache and pain?

You know, only 15% of the people who leave a relationship for second, clandestine relationship ever continue in the second? And finally, would you trust someone not to cheat ON you if he/she cheated WITH you?

Just my thoughts


Ts Jack

 

[Tchalla]

Re: Re: What is considered cheating??

And finally, would you trust someone not to cheat ON you if he/she cheated WITH you?

Just my thoughts


Ts Jack

That statement is exactly how I feel. I will not get into a relationship with someone who is already committed. I may be better than the person they are cheating on, but I know that she could find someone that she feels is better than me also.

As far as what is cheating, to me it is anything that one partner does with someone else that they know that their partner would not be OK with. If you have to hide what you are doing from your partner, then you know it is wrong.

 

[Jenny _S]

Re: Re: Re: What is considered cheating??

That statement is exactly how I feel. I will not get into a relationship with someone who is already committed. I may be better than the person they are cheating on, but I know that she could find someone that she feels is better than me also.

As far as what is cheating, to me it is anything that one partner does with someone else that they know that their partner would not be OK with. If you have to hide what you are doing from your partner, then you know it is wrong.

I competely agree. If I do a three some, it's always with a couple. If I entertain an individual that person will always be unattached. Why bring more grief into this world.

 

[1sexylady]

Nobody owns anyone and I think if your not happy with your relationship but for important reasons you can't leave then you deserve to be happy...and not have to sit there frustrated.... Again until your walking in someone's shoes it is best not to judge... I don't...

 

[sirhugs]

my stock answer is to say its not cheating if you are honest about it. cause if you lie, the truth wil leak out, if not fully, through actions, and the price will be severe.

However, your case may call for a revised opinion. Perhaps if the partner has breached your covenant, its not cheating to make your own new rules.

 

[Arden]

I do think about it and I know that the truth when it comes right down to it but you can't help but to think there is way to make it right to cheat......I hope that makes sense

It sounds like you're asking us to agree that cheating is ok - you're looking for ideas on how to make it feel 'right', or 'fair'. For some reason, you can't leave the relationship right now, and you want to have sex outside of that relationship without guilt. You have special circumstances that warrant it. Doesn't everyone who cheats? "My wife (husband) doesn't understand me, or won't give me what I need in bed" is the oldest, and most sorry excuse out there.

I'm sure my ex used that line on the women he slept with when we were married. I was working 58 - 60 hours a week, had two children. He made more money than I did, but most of his income went to booze and drugs. I could barely get half a month's rent from him each month. I was supporting the family, and he was out sleeping around asking for sympathy.

But, I never cheated on him. Two wrongs don't make it right. What I did was formulate a plan to get out of the marriage. I chose not to cheat so that there wouldn't be any objections to my character when I asked for custody of our daughter. It took me close to a year, but I managed to save enough money to get myself and the kids out of there. Best decision I ever made in my life.

Cheating won't cure your problems at home. If you're unhappy, and see no possible resolution to the problems, make a plan for yourself and get out. It makes no sense to waste years of your life in an unhappy relationship.

Good luck!

 

[SuperShyGuy]

My take on it is this.

Some people have truly open relationships, and I'm perfectly fine with that. As long as you know you can be open with your partner(s) about what you are doing I don't consider that being unfaithful. But the moment you feel the need to hide what you are doing I think you crossed a line. Just my 2 cents.

 

[sirhugs]

It sounds like you're asking us to agree that cheating is ok - you're looking for ideas on how to make it feel 'right', or 'fair'. For some reason, you can't leave the relationship right now, and you want to have sex outside of that relationship without guilt. You have special circumstances that warrant it. Doesn't everyone who cheats? "My wife (husband) doesn't understand me, or won't give me what I need in bed" is the oldest, and most sorry excuse out there.

I'm sure my ex used that line on the women he slept with when we were married. I was working 58 - 60 hours a week, had two children. He made more money than I did, but most of his income went to booze and drugs. I could barely get half a month's rent from him each month. I was supporting the family, and he was out sleeping around asking for sympathy.

But, I never cheated on him. Two wrongs don't make it right. What I did was formulate a plan to get out of the marriage. I chose not to cheat so that there wouldn't be any objections to my character when I asked for custody of our daughter. It took me close to a year, but I managed to save enough money to get myself and the kids out of there. Best decision I ever made in my life.

Cheating won't cure your problems at home. If you're unhappy, and see no possible resolution to the problems, make a plan for yourself and get out. It makes no sense to waste years of your life in an unhappy relationship.

Good luck!

but if as a result of his cheating, your needs aren't being met.... why not, until you can get out?

 

[Noor]

Cheating to me is when one partner puts someone else before their partner. It is a question of intimacy, not necessarily just sex, there can be cheating without sex.

Breaking a committment to be monagamous is cheating, as is breaking any commitment between two partners.

Is cyber cheating?, it can be. When your cyber lover knows more about things that effect your life than your spouse, it is definitely cheating even if your spouse is okay with cyber.

Just my crabby opinion of the day