What do you do when you're depressed to pull yourself up?

[FurryFury]

True enough. But in the case of erotica…
I already fuck myself plenty (me and my unruly appendage have an excellent relationship). When I’m writing erotica I don’t want to just jack-off. AS I’m writing it, I’m explaining things to myself – via the natural reactions of the characters I’m inhabiting. So while the purpose is very much to transfer belief and satisfaction to the reader? I wouldn’t bother to undertake the piece unless there was some knowledge in it I wanted to discover and understand. Thereby making it more visceral and satisfying for me than an exclamation mark to my own tetherball session.

You mentioned you did an anal erotica thing beFORE you went for the actual package (pun intended). I’m thinking you found yourself convinced once you were through drawing it out, that’s something you now understand and you want to experience for real. And you’re now glad you did? Hey – mission accomplished! (Not that we should all run out and try all this crazy shit we’re funneling through a keyboard). You used the transfer to page to discover. Rather than write down what you ‘already know’.

I’m actually stepping OUT of myself – rather than taking what’s already sure of itself and hammering you with it (in fact, my most satisfying stuff was written from a female perspective. I like being that deep inside her). Since I am, in fact, one stubborn bastard? And I think I’m ‘right’ more often than I possibly could be. Tackling sexual situations I don’t “know”…

Is perhaps on a similar level of satisfaction for me – as letting go of all your responsibilities is for you. It’s humbling. (Unfortunately, it’s also educational. So when I’m finished? I’m even more arrogant than I was when I started. Ooops (I much prefer the word ‘ego’ to arrogant. But some would claim one is more accurate than the other)).

In short… When I’m having sex I’m not just giving her what I already know. I’m listening to her body and finding out what she is. Same thing when penning erotica.

And that’s why I can’t go trashing people when I suddenly think to do so. Cuz I don’t have all the information. With the above information I would ABSOLUTELY support what you’re doing then. Permission from those who could be harmed was granted – and the results benefit him. Which means you’re out there doing exactly what I support – exploring your sexuality with a firm belief it’s your right to do so.

There are dangers in that as well though. Sex is the most complicated of all things (delicious). Sometimes it’s not always productive. Sometimes people want re-occurring harm forced upon them, likely in an effort to remove the guilt of past sins/experiences. And I don’t think I’m for that. It hurts me to see that. Which is another of the reasons I barked at you. Sometimes a kiss is not what you need to cure where the damage is occurring.

However, as you mentioned, I’m well aware many subs are unusually strong-willed women. They just want a chance to drop the decisions to someone else and free them up to relax. I get that. But a lot of these ‘subs’ just want to be harmed. Period. And that bothers me. (Bothers me about a lot of the world, actually). I can very much appreciate you prefer the term ‘help-mate’.

What am I after? Respect. And Equality! (Like your husband). And since I’m such an arrogant prick – that’s a tall order. And I like a lot of drool. Lots and lots of droooooool (it’s all Jenna Jameson’s fault).


So… wanna cyber? (I’m kidding!!)

Thanks for your kindness,

XX

Hi XX,

You are most welcome for the kindness! I'm glad we can talk now, in a nicer way!

Drool? Um, well, I rarely drool though I understand gags are good for that. I have no idea who Jenna Jameson is. A porn star maybe? I don't watch porn. It's the words that do me. I think I sometimes drool when I'm really drunk or drugged and sleepy as hell.

You are after mutual respect and equality in a RL sexual romantic relationship right? Then subs are not right for you, I'm thinking. I often tell my men friends. Start off with someone who seems normal then find their naughty bits later! I have some friends who always wanted the girls that "looked bad." Those bitches were mean and not often faithful. Most of my male friends eventually did what I told them and hooked up. I think there is a nasty girl inside most of us.

See in our relationship, I have never been a sub. We are equals. We do respect and like each other a very great deal. I mean I've loved people who I really didn't like. This is far better. It's because of that love and respect, that we do things for each other. It's to give sensation and joy to the other person as they will do for you. I like this very much.

Sometimes I'd like to experience the whole Master/sub thing very much. I won't because he is not into it. I treasure him above my own deeply felt interests in this area. I think the give and take we have is a wonderful thing. I love our relationship and would never want to damage it.

I like to try things in general. Sometimes when I try them I am done and ready for the next thing. Bungee cord jumping and the chain trick (twice) for instance. Sometimes I want to do these things over and over. Like Anal for instance. I just never know what I will say, "Oh okay done that, next!" and what I will say, "Oh! Yeah! More!" about.

Personally I don't know if you are, as you say an "arrogant prick" of what your definition of it happens to be. That could certainly mess up a relationship if you are quick to judge and/or down on yourself as well.

I don't judge others even if they want to be harmed. I do not want to be harmed as I have said. Not significantly anyway, but with the right person I trusted, there is little I wouldn't do for him. He knows that. He has no desire to hurt me. Part of my struggle with the spanking was that he didn't understand how that could feel like sensation and not pain. Until I showed him. *grins*

Yeah I know there are dangers with what I am doing and what I'd like to be doing. What saves me so far is his great ability to communicate with me and not be ego centric or judgmental but supportive. That and the fact I am careful to not go where we would possibly be jeopardizing the relationship even if I have his express permission and support.

Each time we talk I am blown away by his love, self awareness, liking of me and generosity. I can't say enough what that means to me. Men have always liked my looks, always wanted to fuck me, but to like me, the real me, and respect me? Well that blows me away. Also most of THEM were clueless about themselves.

I sort of see us as a team, who support one another in whatever it is the other person wants to do. I would always do this with my men but he is the first one to do it with me. I LOVE that about him.

I do understand what you are saying about erotica. I have been there and done that. I only wish I could write it myself, atm. Yes like you I have tried out things in writing before doing them RL. Yes I wrote anal before I did it and researched it a lot. I did it with a very open mind and yes! I am SO glad I did. So glad I also did it in real life in February! Still when I write I try to keep it very "real." I try to think what I would really feel in that situation and do. I both write what I know and at times what I don't. I mix the two and watch them solidify into something new. I know what you mean by that. It helps me work things out. I was both fascinated and terrified of Anal before. I wrote about it a LOT and researched the hell out of it before I arranged that hotel night.

Yep, life can be GOOD! At times.

I know you were kidding about the cybering but I used to LOVE that. I can't hardly do it anymore or any sex writing. *pouts*

Fury

I usually go to the gym and work out, which to me is the best wy to deal with stress. Im very laid back and never get to mad, upset and stressed out very often anyway.

Hi Petboy!

That is a great way to deal with stress! If you can make yourself go! However stress and depression are two sort of different things.

I love the gym! I love the machines and weights, the cardio room with it's epileptical machines is great. I don't like the lame music in the gym, the clanking of the machines, and the know it alls. My daughter and I haven't gone this summer cause I've been sick and stuff. Hopefully we will start back up when the weather isn't hellishly hot.

Kinda funny, one day we were in the cardio room and they have TV's in there. That sort of pisses me off everywhere I go. If I wanted to watch TV! I'd freaking stay home! I rarely watch any TV these days. Anyway, the two TVs in there are usually tuned to CNN(!) and ESPN . *gags*

But we were the only two there. Hehehe! So we put them on BET! We were dancing on the machines to some funky stuff and these two bitchy suburban mom's came in and nearly shit! LOL!

And there was the time we put on a Black Eyes Peas CD in the player and turned it up! I bet they hate us there, those snobs. Oh hey! Maybe I'm a reverse snob? LMAO!

Fury

to pull myself up... HMM! i normally just grab the rope and pull... granted normally it's attached to hooks in my body, but oh is it a great feeling!

Hooks in your body Ammre? Wow! That is something I haven't tried and probably won't, but if you like it, good for you! Is there much scaring? What do you find that you like about that?

Were you just being funny and provocative or do you really feel this helps you when you are down?

Fury

Yeeeaaaaaah, I'll stick to Petboy's solution.

Yeah me too if I ever get over this sinus crap. *rubs sore ass* Damn doctors and their shots!

Fury

When I'm depressed, I usually think of people who are in worse situations than me. There's always someone with more of a reason to be depressed.

Hi Jasonlf!

Heh! That's why I used to watch soaps! They always had more shit going on than me and that was a good thing. It was a damned hard thing to find in the RW. So soaps were my buddies once. I don't watch them now. The writing has gone to hell. TV's and books used to make me feel safe and take me to other worlds where no one wanted a piece of me.

I tell you I never felt safer than with Grandma Horton eating donuts. I want her couch. I got a slip cover that reminds me of it. I already have those dishes. (That was a totally subconscious purchase that I don't regret.) It's not Christmas though if I don't see the ornaments go up on the Horton tree. Love that Soap Net gave me another opportunity this year for that.

I was so upset that nothing was happening online and about all my freaking obligations I forgot to tape. I hardly watch TV these days. Just watch DVD's and tapes.

Fury

Depression is its own reason. Somewhere out there, there is a 48 year old one legged busboy with cancer whistling on his way to work.

You are such a deep thinker Marquis!

It is true that sometime you are depressed enough that nothing seems to work. Then you just have to keep plodding on.

You really amaze me at times.

*grins*

Fury

I used to do that, but then I realized how I'd feel if someone were making me their "it could be worse" example and I got more depressed.

OOH! Netzach! What a terrible idea! *shivers* I see your point! Now I'll probably think that too!

Fury

Then my thought pattern would be...wow, if he can find the strength to be happy, then so can I. But I do tend to be brighter than your average bear (bright as in happy, not bright as in smart)

Good for you Jasonlf! Not always possible for all of us but good for you!

Fury

There is a difference between low days and clinical depression.

If clinical depression is spotted in time and help that works isn't sorted out (medical or natural or whatever) it can be difficult to even think about anyone else who is in a worse situation.

Sometimes its just too damn hard to think.

True dat! Sometimes it is to hard to think but my damn brain keeps going and it HURTS!!!

Yeah there are differences between down days and clinical depression. Some folks need real professional help. I understand that. Then I fucking cross my fingers hoping they get good help and not a freak, lying, ass like my Mom usually gets.

Fury

 

[Marquis]

Then my thought pattern would be...

wow, if he can find the strength to be happy, then so can I

But I do tend to be brighter than your average bear (bright as in happy, not bright as in smart)

"Smart" is good for parlor tricks and shadow shows.

Wisdom is the heart of true success.

Trust me bro, you're way ahead of the game. My father works with super geniuses. These kids can do differential calculus in their head but don't know how to boil water or hail a cab. Most of them are nuttier than a Baby Ruth.

 

[Marquis]

You are such a deep thinker Marquis!

It is true that sometime you are depressed enough that nothing seems to work. Then you just have to keep plodding on.

You really amaze me at times.

*grins*

Fury

I seem to be crossing into hypomanic territory recently, which is a welcome retreat from the depression. Still, I have to watch out.

Does this lithium crap work at all?

 

[canadiancutie]

I seem to be crossing into hypomanic territory recently, which is a welcome retreat from the depression. Still, I have to watch out.

Does this lithium crap work at all?

you should probably mail yourself your credit cards

 

[FurryFury]

I seem to be crossing into hypomanic territory recently, which is a welcome retreat from the depression. Still, I have to watch out.

Does this lithium crap work at all?

It must or they'd stop prescribing it right? Didn't work for my Mom. Nothing does. It has to work for someone though.

Fury

 

[Marquis]

you should probably mail yourself your credit cards

How will I buy the 300 thermos' I need without my credit card?

 

[FurryFury]

How will I buy the 300 thermos' I need without my credit card?

LMAO! Too fucking funny!

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

Today was a good day. I had fun hanging with my gf, son and her sons. How can I still be sad?

Fury

 

[Marquis]

You know, I feel kinda good, but I wouldn't say this is like manic-good.


Could I..... be...... no.... but, yet all signs seem to indicate......


am I just having a good couple of days?

 

[Kajira Callista]

You know, I feel kinda good, but I wouldn't say this is like manic-good.


Could I..... be...... no.... but, yet all signs seem to indicate......


am I just having a good couple of days?

nope, cant be, never happens.

 

[bronntanas]

"Smart" is good for parlor tricks and shadow shows.

Wisdom is the heart of true success.

Trust me bro, you're way ahead of the game. My father works with super geniuses. These kids can do differential calculus in their head but don't know how to boil water or hail a cab. Most of them are nuttier than a Baby Ruth.

And a lot of them end up in our little corner of perve-land too.

 

[Marquis]

nope, cant be, never happens.

Something is about to pop out behind me, isn't it?

 

[Kajira Callista]

Something is about to pop out behind me, isn't it?

uh huh

 

[Marquis]

And a lot of them end up in our little corner of perve-land too.

I wonder about that. I think we attract a lot of mediocre geniuses. The super geniuses I've met seem to be largely asexual.

 

[FurryFury]

Well, I'll be damned! I know better. I know I should have put on a sun block. I almost always do but it was so cloudy. I knew that wouldn't really matter. So there I was swimming with three kids and my gf. It was great. Huge catfish looking at us like they'd be eating us and not the other way around. (Well, I don't eat fish but you know what I mean.) Sand beneath my feet, fun times and I got burned. *grr* I kinda like that pink glow though, real pretty with purple.

Oh and when I took down my hair? It was all curly! WTF? That has NEVER happened before! Wild stuff! Wild hair! Love it!

And I like a lot of drool. Lots and lots of droooooool (it’s all Jenna Jameson’s fault).
XX

I have to admit I uncharacteristically drooled some tonight.

Oh as about that tether ball thing you said. Have you ever read Stop That Ball! by Mike McClintock? It's a kids book rather Dr. Suess-like and with a dirty adult mind and some booze absolutely hilarious! To many that I have personally shared it with. *chuckles*

Fury

you should probably mail yourself your credit cards

Hi CanadianCutie!

That's actually not a bad idea and it made me laugh too!

Fury

nope, cant be, never happens.

Hi Kajira!

I wrote you before on here and it went all *poof!* Anyway you made me chuckle and I thank you. I find your current avatar lovely and disturbing as well as a turn on all at the same time!

*grins*

Fury

You know, I feel kinda good, but I wouldn't say this is like manic-good.


Could I..... be...... no.... but, yet all signs seem to indicate......


am I just having a good couple of days?

Hi Marquis!

That sounds good to me and again made me laugh! I'm glad for you too!

Fury

Hi Kajira Calista!

You guys are all making me laugh! What is going on? You keep this up I might get all happy and stuff!

Fury

And a lot of them end up in our little corner of perve-land too.

Hi Bronntanas!

You think they do? I like smart perves! In fact all of the people around me are smart, in their own ways. Men HAVE to be smart to hold my interest. Women too!

I wonder about that. I think we attract a lot of mediocre geniuses. The super geniuses I've met seem to be largely asexual.

This will probably come out sounding all wrong and perve-like but I was seriously worried that my kids might be that way. *shudders* I love sex so much I'd hate to see them too brilliantly smart and largely asexual! I actually cried when the school told me my girl was gifted. I wanted her to have a normal and fun life! I'm over that now. She doesn't want normal! It's all good now!

Fury

 

[Marquis]

This will probably come out sounding all wrong and perve-like but I was seriously worried that my kids might be that way. *shudders* I love sex so much I'd hate to see them too brilliantly smart and largely asexual! I actually cried when the school told me my girl was gifted. I wanted her to have a normal and fun life! I'm over that now. She doesn't want normal! It's all good now!

Fury

Being "gifted" isn't anywhere close to the intellectual range where being asexual becomes understandable. She can be real smart, and be valedictorian and go to an Ivy league school and still have a kicking and uninhibited social life.

If she gets a perfect score on the AHSME, let her sit home and work on her warp drive all day. She just might build it one day.

I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but I've seen A LOT of kids suffer from not being pushed to be well rounded. I was probably one of them to some degree. I never had an influence in my life that stressed the importance of athletics. I had a LOT of catching up to do when I realized that the dumb jocks weren't all so dumb after all.

 

[FurryFury]

Being "gifted" isn't anywhere close to the intellectual range where being asexual becomes understandable. She can be real smart, and be valedictorian and go to an Ivy league school and still have a kicking and uninhibited social life.

If she gets a perfect score on the AHSME, let her sit home and work on her warp drive all day. She just might build it one day.

I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but I've seen A LOT of kids suffer from not being pushed to be well rounded. I was probably one of them to some degree. I never had an influence in my life that stressed the importance of athletics. I had a LOT of catching up to do when I realized that the dumb jocks weren't all so dumb after all.

Oh I know just what you mean Marquis!

I just had issues from my own childhood, you see, about all that. I was all hung up about giving these kids the "normal" childhood, education and life I didn't have. I totally agree with you and get what you are saying. It just took me a few days to adjust to the idea, you know? Things are great with her and our little nuclear family now.

*smiles*

Fury

 

[jasonlf]

I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but I've seen A LOT of kids suffer from not being pushed to be well rounded. I was probably one of them to some degree. I never had an influence in my life that stressed the importance of athletics. I had a LOT of catching up to do when I realized that the dumb jocks weren't all so dumb after all.

I was lucky. I'm VERY well rounded. Played two years of football in h/s, was on yearboook staff, worked on the newspaper, was 12th in my class graduating, and was a computer geek.

 

[Marquis]

I was lucky. I'm VERY well rounded. Played two years of football in h/s, was on yearboook staff, worked on the newspaper, was 12th in my class graduating, and was a computer geek.

What did I tell you about this kid guys?!!

Is he a mensch or what?

Heh? heh?

 

[FurryFury]

I was lucky. I'm VERY well rounded. Played two years of football in h/s, was on yearboook staff, worked on the newspaper, was 12th in my class graduating, and was a computer geek.

Hi Jasonlf!

Color me impressed!

Fury

I did a couple of those! LOL! Considering I changed schools frequently, I thought that was pretty freaking good! I love to play football, hate to watch! I like to DO things!

 

[jasonlf]

oh, and p.s., I flunked outta college...

*runs*

Hehe, nothing can teach you responsibility but time, I guess.

 

[astralkiss]

I make fun of stupid people to make myself feel better.

 

[FurryFury]

oh, and p.s., I flunked outta college...

*runs*

Hehe, nothing can teach you responsibility but time, I guess.

I dropped a hellva lot of classes and spent most of my class time in various bars studying vodka and video games but I was on the student council, chairman of the Programs Committee (they should have checked academic records better) and it was my job to throw some great parties, that part I got right! God I hated college! High school too!

Life is soooo much better now!

Fury

 

[XXplorher]

Drunken drool – not so much what I’m after. Nope. For that I’d use my own.

Jenna Jameson is the world’s most successful porn star in history. She popularized excessive saliva trails while worshiping the Cock as it’s meant to be done. She did it without apology, and it’s generally lead to a renaissance in cock slurping that I very much dig. Chicks love her because she frees them up to be the sluts they want to be, so girls are using saliva like it’s oxygen. (I never use ‘slut’ as a derogatory term. What, I’m a stud, but you’re a slut? Ridiculous). Drool rules!

The thing to keep in mind about sucking a man’s cock is – it feels pretty good. But it’s probably not on a par with what oral sex feels like for a woman. Your membranes are a lot more sensitive than ours. For a man? I think it’s about having my cock in your mouth, and watching how much you appreciate it. I want to think that my cock is the most glorious gift you’ve ever received. I want to feel like you can’t breathe without it. (And if you make me feel that way? You’re gonna get yours, believe me. Chances are, actually, you’re sucking my cock that way because I already HAVE given you yours.)

It’s more mental than it is physical. Or it feels better physically because of what my brain is telling me. We’re similar in that manner. Most women like to feel a man Take her and Make her. ‘Societies fucked me all up inside. I just want to get fucked like an animal sometimes, but I’m not supposed to tell you that. So do it without asking permission, pleeeeeeeeease! Asking you to do it would ruin everything!’. That’s your mental angle. Our chance to satisfy that particular primal desire is when our cock is all rigid and firm up inside you. However, a man likes to know that a woman is willing to do whatever his dirty mind can think of… without asking for permission. That’ll make us firm. And we want to start out with your mouth. Unfortunately – the ultimate mutual desire might never be achieved. Unless…

I’m a little forceful. And you respond by bathing my cock in compliance.

Droooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool – is the answer. Get it?

This message brought to you by the Jenna Jameson Foundation for Sexual Gratification.


-There’s a nasty girl inside ALL of you (not just some). And thank God for that! It’s lots of fun to find. However, I don’t want anything to do with ‘normal’. I want unique. And while I’m looking for that, I know exactly what I DON’T want. There are certain qualities I absolutely do NOT want. And because they’re very specific, and common – I tend to rip the cord out from under a woman faster than another might. I don’t think that’s judgmental. As much as it is an absolute certainty in what is bad for me (and therefore her).

And because my manner is a little bit ‘sure’ like this, I tend to attract women who want a man that’s certain. Cuz he’ll know what to do. And they - don’t. And that is not what I desire in a mate. That is not mutual equality. And it’s an insult to the abilities of a female… It’s an insult to the woman I should be waiting for.

If your husband and you are on common ground? Why do you feel the need to kneel beneath it? Is it because HE might be a tiny bit less than equal? A tiny bit less than willing to step up there, throw his sword in the dirt and say “Mine!” A tiny bit less than a Man as you perceive it? He’s so MUCH for equality, that it ISN’T equal? It’s putting too much burden on YOU to make the choices? He’ll just simply accept it? And you would rather be the one a tiny bit below? (I’m not judging your man. I’m asking).

Cuz I’m not willing like that. I would never allow myself to be a tiny bit below (in moments, yes. But never sustained). Yet I have no desire to be an obvious imprint above (which is why it’s ‘ego’ – and not ‘arrogance’). That tiny slice of a difference is enough to leave me walking alone. If only to remain available for ‘her’, if I should ever be so fortunate…

Am I still engaged in the discussion you intended?

-Oh, I understand the spanking thing. Ohhhhhhhhhhhh, you betcha. ‘Sting my spine and convince me I’m naughty – god damn it’s gewd to be bad’. The sexual insinuation in the way a woman’s ass moves… just grips my fuckin’ desire. And that’s also the place to punish you for it. Oh darn. I find nothing more exciting than a woman’s ass. And of the many things I want to do to it… spanking is high on the list. “Sway for me, you dirty, dirty girl”.

-So, you’re babalicous and all those dicks (pun intended, again) out there didn’t recognize the value beyond that other than to champion their own insecure desire to say “Look who I’m with. Do you approve?” Something close to that? Hubs knew how to reach inside you and validate you were more than someone visibly worth fucking? He knew how to compliment what you are? But then… you started to miss the idea that clothing-incarcerated cocks all around the nation were no longer available to squeeze? That your sexy ass wasn’t available on the radar anymore. Now all of a sudden everything came with things attached to it. And you sort of miss the simplicity of a cock up your cunt just for the sake of a solid screw? And you feel a bit guilty about that? And it forces a desire to just get on your knees and let the cock lead the way for a change? And besides, you had no decision in the matter… the Man just took over. Yeah – gimme that! Yes?

I get it (or do I?).

I sort of feel like you’re defending the love you maintain for your husband. And I probably brought that to the surface cuz I questioned your dedication during my spaz attack. But… I hear guilt. And guilt is the enemy. If any of what I deduced above is true? It’s perfectly fucking natural. What ISN’T natural, is the fact you chose to tell him about it. And get his blessings. Most women wouldn’t bother to do that. Most women aren’t good enough.

I would like to think your ‘help-mate’ persona could add that to her repertoire and thereby free yourself from the despair that initially brought this thread to life. Cuz that makes for very satisfying sex. The guilt-free kind where she slaps the cock on her tongue and says “I just love a messy cock”. And then sucks it not cuz she HAS to - but because there doesn’t seem any fucking sensible reason in the world why she shouldn’t! Not to mention it’s going to earn her some dangerous dicking since her man now feels secure in his right to pound her like he’s been dying to do since the first time he witnessed her sinful little ass slip by…

All in favor say “I” !!

-Have you ever read Stop That Ball! by Mike McClintock? It's a kids book rather Dr. Suess-like and with a dirty adult mind and some booze absolutely hilarious!

What?! Dirty Dr Seuss? With booze?!!

Wait a sec… I consider Dr Seuss my personal Guru (and I’m totally serious!). Dr. Seuss taught me a whole ton of stuff that I’ve carried with me ever since. He absorbed me within every fantastical story, and then he taught me something by the time I had finished it. (I was desperately searching for Sola Salew… and on the Beaches watching The Sneeches… and in the realm of The Lorax… And I knew right from wrong. Because Dr Seuss confirmed it for me.) And because I felt he understood me? I bought in to what he taught me. The moral of the story ALWAYS made sense. I trusted him completely.

I think he’s an absolute hero and one that never received the proper respect when it was over… for him. The guy… is the rarest of rare.

And I am an absolute pervert. But I don’t know that I want my Dr Seuss memories raped by giant cocks and insatiable women. I mean (I’m laughing here, but) I’m not sure I want to read that. I’ll have to think on that… (funny shit though. Thanks for the mention).

And how was the drooooooool? Did you recognize what it did for you when you did it? Did it get a motivational response? I want to know allllll about that. Put it in a PM (or don’t cheat the rest and tell us ALL about it right here).

-Yes, I noticed there aren’t any stories listed here for you (as I looked for them after my last reply). You not only stopped but had to remove them as well? Umm… why?

I used to be pretty visible around here, several successful stories. But then I yanked them (for reasons I won’t go into). I posted some of them back up that might be worth looking at since you like to ask questions (and for the record, I like a girl who likes to ask questions. Not about me so much as questions in general. Girls who DON’T ask questions? Suck!). The story I referred to earlier is on the slow track but should be posted soon. I’d be VERY interested in your take on how I played it out. I said here I failed, but I don’t think I did… at least… I don’t think I failed ‘her’.

‘Till then, is anyone else interested in my space gobbling blathering? I should probably put an end to this (at least publicly).


And please don’t *pout*. It turns big studs into pools of goo. Unfair practice…

 

[FurryFury]

<snip> Am I still engaged in the discussion you intended?
I get it (or do I?). <snip>I used to be pretty visible around here, several successful stories. But then I yanked them (for reasons I won’t go into). I posted some of them back up that might be worth looking at since you like to ask questions (and for the record, I like a girl who likes to ask questions. Not about me so much as questions in general. Girls who DON’T ask questions? Suck!). The story I referred to earlier is on the slow track but should be posted soon. I’d be VERY interested in your take on how I played it out. I said here I failed, but I don’t think I did… at least… I don’t think I failed ‘her’.

‘Till then, is anyone else interested in my space gobbling blathering? I should probably put an end to this (at least publicly).

And please don’t *pout*. It turns big studs into pools of goo. Unfair practice…

Okay, first the drool wasn't because I had been drinking. It was because of the sex that night being so fucking good.

In fact it's been too long since I have been drinking, yeah, much too long, but that is another story. I need to do that one night soon! *makes a note to herself*

I believe I have already stated why I am drawn to the idea of submissiveness. I've also stated that I don't really have that and never will. Once more, I feel like I am in charge of too much. He likely does as well. We are happy to be able to play each other and do so pretty equally in my opinion.

The discussion of this thread was how to pull yourself up when you are blue. I don't believe any of this was really part of it, so no, I'd have to say you are not still engaged in the topic I intended but these things oft go astray it's no big deal.

Um, no I don't feel guilty very often. I never felt like I was sport screwing. I kind of wish I had. I have fucked exactly four men. Married two of them. I would never consider doing what I am and not tell my husband what I was up to. I would quit if he had a problem with it. He doesn't.

What is true is that I will never feel good enough or loved enough. So online play helps that just a little and it's nice. I get to preview things. I get to meet people virtually. It's convenient. It's opened up a whole lot of great things for our relationship and sex life that were closed mostly due to my first marriage.

What brought this thread about was an uncharacteristically long blue period. It was due in part from losing contact with someone. He was taking me down a path I have so very much wanted to go for years but did not know how to. That was one of the key factors. There were, as there always are, for me at least, a lot of factors that hit at the same time. I got damned tired of being blue and not being able to write.

I don't believe I feel the slightest bit guilty when I have sex with my lover. I'm open to just about any kind of play, eager and willing even. I wasn't that open before online activities but I am now.

Well I do like Dr. Seuss too! I particularly like The Big Brag, Gertrude Mc Fuzz, Myrtle the Turtle and Green Eggs and Ham. I've used them all in programs a few times.

The drool was simply a small thing when I was enjoying what was going on either Thursday or Friday evening. I don't remember anymore what night it was even or that many details. I knew when I wrote that post. How sad.

I do remember I had my head down the way I prefer, and was on my knees. I love that. I had really gotten into things. He wanted to change positions. While doing that I thought, wow I actually drooled, how unusual! Then whatever came next took up all my attention. How irritating I can't remember it all now. I should have writen it while it was fresh.

Let's see Thursday the warm up was figging. Last night it was temperature play. I may have writen more details in those threads though not about drooling as I personally don't find it so appealing at all.

I have never put a story on lit. I have several I am writing but I'm not sure if I will bother to submit. I do have three stories I am thinking of finishing and submitting. One would be in either the loving wives or anal section. One in the BDSM section and the last one in the I dunno, fantasy sex section maybe, where vampires and such are?

When I write though I like interaction. I mostly write in the SRP's. I can throw you some links if you like. I find it much more challenging and stimulating to write with others. In fact one of my reasons for getting into online play was to hone my writing skills in the areas of dialog and detail. I would have said in October that I could never write a sex scene. Boy was I wrong about that. When you do write with others it presents unique challenges that I think will help my skills grow even more. I am thinking about taking some time off and just focusing on my solo projects soon. We shall see.

I will be happy to read your story when available and let you know what I think.

I rarely pout but I will do so when I wish!

*grins*

Fury