What Are The Biggest Lies We Hear?

[miles]

They can't be:

I won't cum in your mouth
Check is in the mail
I'm from the gov't (or IRS)and here to help you.
Quotes from politicians




Mine, for now:

I get all the sex I need
This will make your job easier
My s/o is always horny
I KNOW there is enough in my account
I didn't vote for that asshole
Oh, it's not so bad!

 

[Pokerman]

The doctor said it's not contagious...

 

[vlvtelvis]

"at least it can only get better from here"

 

[Simply Me]

"I really don't expect you to cook and clean for me. I believe in 50/50."

"This won't hurt a bit", as the needle comes plunging towards your sensitive skin.

"I swear, honey, she's just a friend"

 

[Pokerman]

WHAT GUYS SAY/WHAT THEY MEAN

"I really don't expect you to cook and clean for me. I believe in 50/50."

50/50:

You cook it....I'll it eat.
I'll mess it ....you clean it.

 

[Bubblegum *sugarless*]

He/she would not have wanted you to grieve.

One size fits all.

The speculum may be a little cold.

 

[Simply Me]

WHAT GUYS SAY/WHAT THEY MEAN



50/50:

You cook it....I'll it eat.
I'll mess it ....you clean it.

Spoken like a true man! A man can go hungry around me waiting for me to cook for him all the time. My meals usually consist of crackers and peanut butter, and sometimes, no peanut butter.
But then, on the other hand, I'm not opposed to him cooking for me everyday,if he was so inclined to do so..

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Your call is very important to us.

 

[Laurel]

I'll have that to you in 48 hours.

Oh, I didn't realize that my post advertising Hot Asian Teen Hardcore Amateurs for only $9.99 was spam!

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

They read your script.

 

[Pokerman]

A man can go hungry around me waiting for me to cook for him all the time. My meals usually consist of crackers and peanut butter, and sometimes, no peanut butter.

But are those RITZ crackers?

 

[Simply Me]

But are those RITZ crackers?

They make other kinds?

 

[Pokerman]

They make other kinds?

a woman after my own heart!

Darlin, you bring the Ritz, I'll bring the cheese and peanut butter...

The cheese is to spread on the crackers, the peanut butter is to spread on YOU....

 

[KillerMuffin]

"The shed's almost done, really!"
"Go ahead and write, I won't bother you."
"I got the dishes tonight, hun."
"Don't worry about dinner, I'll make it."
"I'll help around the house."


*grumbles*

 

[Dhalgren]

"Well..I'm 5'8. I have long beautiful, naturally blonde hair. My eyes are a sparkling blue. My measurements are..44.22.36. I weigh 102lbs...."

 

[Simply Me]

a woman after my own heart!

Darlin, you bring the Ritz, I'll bring the cheese and peanut butter...

The cheese is to spread on the crackers, the peanut butter is to spread on YOU....

But, what if I prefer the peanut butter on the crackers, and the cheese on me??

 

[Pokerman]

But, what if I prefer the peanut butter on the crackers, and the cheese on me??

Hmmmm that sounds good too.... Guess I can be flexible.....

 

[Simply Me]

Hmmmm that sounds good too.... Guess I can be flexible.....

Gotta love a flexible man! Oooooooh, the possibilities.

 

[teresafannin]

The first year is the worst.

 

[Debbie]

"It's better to walk away from a fight" (duh and get punched in the back of the head?)

"Elementary, my dear Watson"

"I didn't do it"

"I never saw a thing, officer"

 

[Wyatt]

Army Lie Number One.

Go ahead Sir,we'll cover you

 

[Pokerman]

Gotta love a flexible man! Oooooooh, the possibilities.

Hmmmm am imagining them now..

 

[Simply Me]

Hmmmm am imagining them now..

Ahhh, to have E.S.P.!

 

[Pokerman]

Ahhh, to have E.S.P.!

Ohhhh I think you can imagine what I'm thinking about..lol

Now where did I put that swiss cheese?

 

[Simply Me]

Ohhhh I think you can imagine what I'm thinking about..lol

Now where did I put that swiss cheese?

You mean this cheese that I have dangling out from between my teeth??